A/N:

Owiee... yes, I know this has been done a hundred times before, but I just LOVE Gohan-torturing fics. Also I think that I might find a new way of torturing him while I'm going along with it.

But nevertheless, Frozenflower did the best Torture-Gohan-Fic I know so far! I would not dream of being even close to her level of writing, so go read her story "Bring your father to school's day- Revived", if you like mine!

I LIKE Gohan. I think it's highly unfair that he never got any credits for what he achieved and that he was forced to turn out to be the stupid bookworm they made him, so this is actually kinda my way of honoring him!

Might be inserting yaoi in the future somewhere, because I am an addict, nevermind, but it certainly won't involve Gohan, cause I like the idea of him and Videl.

This story takes place after Gohan has entered Orange Star highschool. Nobody knows about any of his secrets. Goku is still dead. (but since I like him way too much he won't stay dead very long).

Me not english native, so please be nice.

Disclaimer:

If I would own DBZ, it would not take two episodes for the fight to start and twenty for it to finish, there would be a LOT more Vegeta and all the cuties would be forced to wear spandex. So... do you think I should own DBZ? Huh? *grins

A Divine Comedy

Part 1

~~* The three assignments of doom *~~

It was just a perfectly normal day for Son Gohan, most powerful being of the universe, also known as The Great Saiyaman, though only to a very few people. He had flown to school early, as always disguised as his superhero counterpart so that he would not catch too much attention (actually his costume and stupid posing while flying DID catch a lot of attention, but that didn't matter, since it was directed to a well known superhero and not towards shy nerdy Son Gohan, who never even dared to raise his voice). But nevertheless he had nearly been late for first class, thanks to Videl, who had somehow managed to follow him for most of the way, trying to catch him and finally find out who this stupid Saiya-guy was anyhow. He had managed to loose her though, by dodging her heli and diving into the gap between two tall buildings. Afterwards he had sped up and made it for school just in time. Now he was having his last class for the day and was already thinking about what to do in the afternoon. He realized, that he'd probably love a good spar – he had not been able to spar in a while, and he was currently thinking about either asking Piccolo to train with him or maybe even have a round with Trunks and Goten. Neither was a real threat to him, but when fusioned they did provide a good challenge.

Lazily he gazed out of the window, not really paying attention to what was happening. He was way ahead of the class anyway, since Chichi made him study so hard. That was why he literally jumped and emitted a small squeak when somebody very suddenly pinched his behind. The teacher gave him a odd stare as he looked around wildly to find out who might have done this to him. Of course it was not very hard to find out who'd done it, judging by the far too innocent look on Erasa's face. Staring at her suspiciously Gohan settled himself once again. The teacher, Mrs. Darrington, glared at him.

"As I was saying just before I was interrupted so very RUDE, this week you will be going on various field trips to facilities, companies and institutions all over the city to get yourself some practical insights into life. Now, I would like you to team up in fours, please."

The students, who had been chattering exitedly at the announcement of this wonderful news, instantly crowded together and then split up into groups of four. While Mrs. Darrington had still been speaking Erasa had just so much as jumped forward, throwing herself onto Son Gohan. As had about a fistfull of other girls, all desparately seeking to team up with the handsome young Demi-Saiyan. Gohan somewhat blushed with all the girls begging him to let them be his company, but was – to his utmost relief – liberated from this difficult task, when someone pushed though the bickering group of girls, who had started to argue about which of them was worty of accompanieing Son Gohan. Videl placed herself at Gohans side, glaring daggers at the other girls who somehow instantly lost interest and broke away. Clinging to Videl was, of course, the inevitable Sharpener.

"So, that makes four of us, then?" Videl asked with a certainty in her voice that dared anyone to go and interfere. The other three nodded in agreement. Despite the hopes of various females it had been clear from the start, that they would team up.

Gohan was actually a little bit exited. This was supposed to be fun, going out of school, finding out about how companies worked and stuff. Finally a diversion from all the studying.

"Quiet now!" Mrs. Darrington ordered the chattering herd of students.

"Listen good, now that you have teamed up, one of each group is going to pick three assignments out of this bag. They contain the names of companies and facilities you are supposed to visit. And remember that you'll have to do a 20-page-essay on each facility. So you better take notes. First is group red, please!"

A boy stepped forward and picked three little papers, tightly folded. He then went back to his group, where they were opening up the little notes and reading exitedly.

"Group blue is next!"

A girl with beautiful green hair was ushered forward by her companions. Shly she stepped towards the desk and picked. When she returned to her group, the little notes where nearly torn apart because of eager awaiting hands. There was some cheering on the first and long faces on the second and third one. Apparently those were boring or difficult.

"Now would group gold please pick their assignments!"

That was their group. Without even looking Videl stepped forward, taking the leadership as always.

~~~***~~~~

Meanwhile in the palace of kami:

Dende stood at the edge of the lookout, watching earth as the dutyful guardian that he was. He had recently taken care of two major earthquakes and a volcano, but now earth was unusually quit. And it had continued to be that peacefully for the whole day now. Dende was really trying hard to be a good guardian, but right now he was bored out of his wits. There was absoluetely nothing to do. So he decided to have a look after his cloesest friends on earth. He did not have to look for Piccolo, since the tall Namekian was meditating just a few feets away in the shadow of a big palm tree. He was hovering in mid-air and had his eyes shut firmly. He was humming out a low tone and had continued to do so for the last few hours. He was also a darn boring sight, as Dende thought for himself. So the teenage god just looked around, noticing Muten Roshi going on with his usual businness – watching aerobic shows on TV - in Kame House, watched Trunsk and Goten play outside in the gardens of Capsule Corp - they were apparently trying to knock each other senseless with smal ki-blasts - and was now searching for Son Gohans Ki. As to be suspected he found him inside school. Dende watched fo a while, then snickered. He had taken a liking in playing practical jokes on Son Gohan, though he thoroughly had regretted doing so the last time. He still had to laugh despite the ghostly memory of a severely sore butt when he thought about Son Gohan's face, as he was opposed to a very angry saiyan prince who accused him of having ripped his spandex in some HIGHLY revealing places throughout sparring ON PURPOSE. Vegeta then had beaten the shit out of Gohan, who had returned the favor to Dende only a short while later.

But still... it was so darn boring and Dende really could not think of any other distraction. And Son Gohan was such a tempting victim… And if he managed to pull a joke on Gohan without the powerful Teen-Saiyajin even noticing, what could possibly go wrong? So Dende firmly shut his eyes, concentrated and rearranged reality... though only a very small part of it.

~~~***~~~~

Videl slipped her hand into the bag and randomly chose three little pieces of paper.

Then she returned to the eagerly awaiting Gohan, Erasa and Sharpener.
Erase nearly jumped on her.

"What did we get, what did we get?!? Open it, Videl, quick!"

"Allright, don't rush me, you'll see soon enough!"

But Erasa had already grabbed one piece of paper from Videl's hand and opened it in a hurry.

"Lucky Dragon Sportscenter" she red out loud.

"Hey, that does sound interesting!" Sharpener said.

Gohan, Videl and Erasa agreed, not a bad start so far. Videl then opened the next one herself.

She visibly paled. The other three curiously watched her swallow.

"What is it? Something really bad?" Sharpener asked in a concerned voice.

"Videl? You okay?!" Even Gohan was concerned about the girls attitude. Videl steadied herself.

"Yeah... geez, it's nothing. Guess what.. our second one is.. err.. "The Mr. Satan Dojo for extended Martial Arts"!"

Her announcement instantly caused some trouble as those around her picked up attention, as always with the word "Mr Satan".

"What?" a blonde boy exclaimed, "You got the dojo? Isn't that a bit of a coincidence?"

"Aw c'mon, you just jealous, Shinto, of course it's just a coincidence! How could she have done it on purpose?" his girlfriend calmed him.

Various statements of envy and jealousy declaring that they would just LOVE to go to the dojo were uttered around the four lucky winners.

Videl shook her head muttering under her breath and held the last paper out to Gohan, completely ignoring Sharpener who had been trying to get her attention all along.

"Here, you get to read the last one."

Gohan sighed and took it. It wasn't that bad so far. The first one sounded fairly interesting, the second one was going to be hell annoying, but if he kept himself nice and low, what could possibly happen? Besides that he had to put up with that freak Mr. Satan, but he was used to the guy's irritating behaviour by now and should be able to survive at least one day. Carefully he opened and red the small note, who held their third assignment. His eyes grew bigger and bigger and his mouth stood open gaping.

NO!

This could not be!

This was not happening!

Videl glared at him, as he stood silent, completely frozen in shock.

"Gohan? Hey? Son Gohan?? Now, what is it? Tell us!"

tbc…

Harr.. I guess, you all wanna know where they have to go to. This is kind of a real bad cliffie, since everyone should be able to guess where I will send them – it's not that hard, c'mon! I'll try and write on soon, if you promise me to review. By the way, I am always open for suggestions (though not for where they are going to go to, that I have already decided) so feel free to write what you would like to see in this fic, 'kay?