A/N So this is my first fic in a while, and yes, it's another songfic, and, yes, it's another sad one. But for a different category this time.
Disclaimer: The song 'The Last Day On Earth' belongs to Kate Miller-Heidke and her producers etc. Harry Potter and all characters therein belong to J..
*FLASHBACK*
All around me I heard the sounds of a battle raging. All around me. I tried desperately to open my eyes. To help. But I couldn't seem to get my body to respond.
Look down the ground below is crumbling
Look up the stars are all exploding
Finally I was able to open my eyes slightly, just as a massive explosion illuminated the night sky. I rolled haphazardly onto my side, ignoring the splitting headache that I was sporting. I groggily lifted my head and saw chaos; utter chaos. Flashes of spells being cast, people running, screams piercing the night air…and bodies…everywhere.
I started to panic when I realised he was no longer with me. He had told me that he wouldn't leave my side and that no matter what happened, he would stay with me, but he was not there; he had broken his promise. I would have been angry if I wasn't so frantic. My eyes roamed through the sea of faces, looking for his distinctive features, but I couldn't see him anywhere. I began screaming his name, all traces of the headache gone, because I had gone numb to any other feeling except fear.
And there he was. Through the gaps in the crowd, I could see him. Flash after flash flew from the tip of his wand. He had the uncanny ability to hit his mark every time. I took a few shaky steps towards him, but at that moment, I heard an ear-splitting crash and the ground beside me seemed to implode. I screamed his name and my eyes widened as his locked onto mine. He began to run towards me, but in his panic, he didn't notice a spell being cast from his previous adversary. It hit him square in the back of the head and the terrified look on his face just froze as he fell. This all spanned the space of about 5 seconds. As the very ground beneath me began to collapse, I felt myself falling down fast.
*END FLASHBACK*
It's the last day on earth
In my dreams
It's the end of the world
And you've come back to me
In my dreams
I never could quite get rid of the look on his face as his life force was extinguished forever. It haunted me still. I had never seen his face contort that way before. All that fear, the terror…it was for me. He was scared for me. If I hadn't have yelled his name, if he had have just kept fighting, he would have had time to block the spell. He would have lived.
It had only been 2 weeks since the end of the battle. Lord Voldemort had been destroyed, but the casualties to our side were absolutely devastating. I now sat next to one of my best friends, the other having been…the other…because of me.
And I dreamed of him. Every night since it happened. I always dreaded the dreams before I went to sleep, but strangely I just couldn't get enough of them once I was having them. Waking up was the worst part of it. It was like losing him all over again. I felt like I would never be whole again…and I wouldn't. How could I be? I gave myself to him in every sense of the phrase; I was his, and he…he was mine.
Between the dust and the debris
There's a light surrounding you and me
*FLASHBACK*
I landed heavily with a dull thump. Having heard two more thumps, I looked wildly around to see who else had fallen. One was a man of no more than about 25, his eyes closed, a torrent of blood streaming down his face. I had never met him before in my life, but I knew he was on our side because I had seen him talking to Lupin just before this gruesome business began.
I turned my head to the second person and I instantly felt sick. Neville Longbottom was lying, spread-eagled, in front of me, his legs sticking out at odd angles. Dead.
"Neville," I whispered, but then my voice stuck in my throat as I tried to comprehend just what I was seeing. All sound left me and it seemed like everything had gone away; it was just Neville and I now. I moved slowly towards him and I saw with a pang of horror and sadness that his eyes were wide and staring. I quickly closed them. But then another explosion from above reminded me of what I had seen before I fell.
The crater that I had fallen into was not so deep that I couldn't get out of it, but it was a struggle. I finally managed to claw my way out, but I was momentarily disoriented as I tried to remember in which direction I had seen him fall. My head swung rapidly from side to side, sifting through the multitudes of people.
Then my eyes locked onto him.
I stumbled forwards and fell with an arbitrary thump half on top of him. I tugged at his dead weight, willing him to roll over and eventually he succumbed. As his head lolled to the side and I saw his eyes, as wide and staring as Neville's had been, I knew. Realisation flooded me like a torrent of fire coursing through my body. And then suddenly I went cold. As the war raged around us, I cupped his cheek in my hand and planted a soft kiss on his, still warm, lips. Tears ran errant down my face, as I stared dumbly down at him. The ghost of fear still lingered in his features and I immediately drowned in sorrow as I realised that this was exactly how he didn't want to die. He wanted to go out in a blaze of heroism, something dignifying. But he didn't. His last emotion was fear, his last action was to run, his dying words a terrifying screech into the night.
*END FLASHBACK*
It's the last day on earth
In my dreams
It's the end of the world
And you've come back to me
In my dreams
But in my dreams, he was there with me. He was happy. And I was happy. It's just the goddam waking *up* that I can't handle. Every time I do, I feel like there's no point in getting out of bed. There is really no point. I lived for him. He was my soul-mate, my best friend, my confidante, my everything. How was I supposed to keep on living? I barely even noticed time passing. My body slipped out of anything resembling a routine and I found myself becoming more and more lost.
And you hold me closer than I can ever remember being held.
I'm not afraid to sleep now, if we can stay like this until
But when we are together…well…it's a feeling I can't describe. I know that it's a dream, but all that means is that I know I don't want to wake up. The dreams…they used to scare me. But after a few nights, I realised that it was the only time I got with you now. I know that it isn't real and that it's just a you that has been manufactured by myself from memories and imagination, but it's the closest thing I have now. I feel like I'm going insane. What kind of life is it when you just want to sleep all the time? When life seems pointless and it hurts just knowing that I am alive, and you…you are not.
And you know what I miss the most? It's not the little presents that you used to leave for me. And it's something different than the way you make me feel. It's the way you used to hold me. Like I was the most precious thing on Earth and it was your job to protect me. Some girls might say that it makes them feel inferior, or vulnerable, but to me, it let me know you cared. And so when I dream, most of the time, we aren't even moving. You are just holding me. Holding me to you, the way you used to. But it seemed so much more intimate, as if it were actually you and not some figment of my dreams.
It's the last day on earth
In my dreams
It's the end of the world
And you've come back to me
In my head I replay our conversations
Over and over til they feel like hallucinations
You know me? I love to lose my mind
And every time anybody speaks your name I still feel the same
I ache, I ache, I ache inside.
*FLASHBACK*
"You are so beautiful, did you know that?" he smiled at me, his eyes glinting in the light.
"Stop it," I giggled and playfully hit his elbow.
"No, I mean it," he laughed as he took my hand in his and with his other, he pulled me close.
It had been so long since we could just sit here and do this. The Order kept us very busy at home, at school, everywhere. We always managed to find small moments in which to squeeze some time together, but it was these moments I really, really cherished. I don't know how long we sat there, just murmuring things to each other. One of the things that I really loved about him…about us, was our ability to talk for hours on end and never run out of things to say. We could talk about anything under the sun and no matter what it was, it was still meaningful to us. The fact that we were able to just sit there and talk.
"Hermione, I love you so much," he breathed as his hand cupped my cheek, "I will love you for as long as I live and longer, of that I am sure."
I opened my mouth to say something to him, but he shushed me.
"I have never been more positive about anything in my whole life. I want to spend my life with you," my stomach dropped and I suddenly felt giddy, "Hermione…will you spend eternity with me? Will…will you be my wife?"
*END FLASHBACK*
Of course I had said yes. I loved him just as much as he had loved me, if not more. The fact that we had never been able to say our vows and cement our partnership forever made it hurt all that much more. I would never be able to say that I was Mrs Hermione Granger. Mrs…
"Hermione," I felt bad that Ron had to comfort me, "Harry would have wanted you to live and be happy."
Mrs Harry James Potter.
A/N *cry* Poor Hermione. Mmmm, it felt good to write again. I mean…not that this is a feel-good story, but…you know. Uhh…anyway, hope it was ok =] Review if you like, I do like to read a good review. And I *will* reply to every review I receive (if any…lol).