I know I should be working on fics and posts for the numerous RPs that Shadow and I have started and are working on… but this bunny bit me and I kinda just had to write it. Hope you'll all enjoy.
Maggie…what the slag are you ingesting?"
"Hu'?" Maggie looked up at Ratchet and made a face, the variety bag chocolate in her lap falling to the floor as she moved. The human held it up before pulling out a couple of the wrapped candies, the plastic making a strange crinkly sound. At the same time Sam, sitting on Optimus' shoulder chuckled, already sensing what was going to happen after falling prey to mother-Ratchet.
"Its just chocolate Ratchet, it's really good." Maggie said, ripping open the wrapper to a mini-Twix and taking a bite of the sugary goodness. "I'll probably finish off this whole bag by tonight…"
The two humans could see the autobot medic's optics flash as he searched the internet, Optimus silently and discreetly doing the same… and then calmly watching Ratchet glare at the young women in front of him, still munching on her candy happily.
"Do you not know," he fumed, "that that stuff is high in fat content and other chemicals that will increase your body weight exponentially over time? and also you don't need-"
"Are you saying I'm fat?" Happiness gone Maggie stared up at Ratchet with fire in her eyes, returning his glare.
"Say good-bye to your medic Optimus…" Sam muttered, leaving the autobot leader to watch in wonder at the battle that had brewed and was waging… what was Sam?... oh. Ratchet had snatched up the bag of chocolate and was trying to pull it away from his charge, scowling as his optics glowed.
"Of course not!" He was saying. "I just know it's not healthy for you to…" He trailed off and nearly dropped his hold on the bag when he looked into Maggie's eyes, feeling dread snake through his spark at the promise of pain those expressive brown eyes held.
"Drop the chocolate Ratchet." She growled, voice a deadly calm. "Drop it now and I won't hack your systems and turn you into a puppy dog while you sleep, I'm sure Jazz and the twins would love the blackmail."
"You wouldn't… you couldn't…"
"Try me, I've been learning from Frenzy and Jazz. Now let go of my candy!"
Not surprisingly Ratchet stood his ground, stubbornness kicking in at exactly the wrong moment. "It's not healthy!"
"RATCHET LET GO OF MY FUCKING CANDY NOW!!"
Silence descended on the base as they all heard Maggie's shout, except Sam's comment to Optimus as the human turned to him to explain. "Rule number one here on earth, never touch a women's chocolate, it's what keeps them sane and happy."