A/N: This series is simply a resting place for all my 'homeless' drabbles and oneshots - so be prepared as there will be no continuity, complete randomness, and a variety of genres.
Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach. It is the property of the awesome Kubo Tite!
Superheroes
Urahara resisted the urge to bang his head against the wall as Ichigo scratched the back of his head, signature scowl in place.
"I still don't get it".
"I know how to explain it," Inoue said brightly.
Everyone regarded her with trepidation, unsure of where her unusual train of thought might lead.
"You've read American comics right, Kurosaki-kun?"
"Sure," Ichigo said cautiously.
"Well you're like the toxic goo that turns ordinary people into superheroes."
"Toxic...goo?"
"Yes, only you're much less slimy and we don't have to fall into you."
"So what you're saying," said Ichigo slowly, "is that my enormous reiatsu is causing the people around me to develop supernatural abilities?"
Inoue nodded happily, while behind her Ishida and Chad attempted to pick their bottom jaws up off the floor.
Ichigo turned towards the shopkeeper.
"What the fuck, Getaboshi. How was that hard to explain?"
.
Unable to fully resist the temptation any longer, Urahara decided to compromise by banging his student's head against the wall instead.