Marius looks down at the girl, her soft sweet brown eyes now closed forever. She was breathing a second ago, but now Eponine lay dead in his arms, and he thought she looked even more beautiful now since she was finally at peace. He just couldn't believe it, his best friend since he could remember. Gone. Just like that. He was just 10 years old when he met her, he remembered the day clearly.
Young Marius saw her try to steal bread from the Vender and grabber her arm as she tried to get away. He remembered thinking it was so thin and delicate. She had brown hair that fell a little past her shoulders, tangled and knotted. Her skin was dark from being in the sun all day, and she was wearing nothing more than rags. What really stuck out to him, was her beautiful brown eyes. They were the kind of eyes you could read someone's soul in, and there was something in his eyes that made him shutter. "You must pay for that Mademoiselle." He shouted at the girl. Marius came from a wealthy family where manners and proper behavior was everything.
The girl turned around, her face at first frightened, but then relaxed when she saw he was only a boy no older than herself. The corners of her mouth curled into a smirk, a smirk Marius would come to know very well. "You can't tell me what to do! I'll take this bread because I'm hungry, and Papa told me I must find my own dinner!"
Marius took pity on her, and reached in his pockets for money to give her so she could eat and her Papa wouldn't be angry with her.
The girl looked at him, she laughed again, that deep genuine laugh Marius loved so much. "I don't need nobody's money." She said proudly. She was now standing up straighter than before. She looked so sure of herself, so sure of the world. Her brown eyes seemed to radiate with life.
Marius was shocked, no one had ever turned down money before, that's all anyone ever seemed to care about these days, but not this girl. This strange girl seemed to see something else in life no one else did. "Well, I'm Marius if you ever need any."
She smiled, "And I'm Eponine." And just like that she was gone.
Eponine always did come and go when she pleased. In the first few years of their friendship, Marius always thought she was free, much like a bird or the wind. He always admired her audacity and her spunk. She would speak to people and say exactly what was on her mind. He always was jealous of her, how she always seemed to be able to do what she pleased. Until one day, when they were 16 he found her crumbled in a ball in an ally.
"Eponine?! What are you doing here?! And What on earth happened to your arm?!" He said running his fingers over the large hand shaped prints on her forearms. She flinched at his touch. He noticed she was crying and he became uncomfortable because Eponine always came off so strong and carefree, and to see her in such a state was painful. She looked more lie a child than he had ever seen her. Even the day they met 6 years ago, she had looked grown up and sure. Now she looked lost and afraid.
Eponine didn't look up at him when he sat beside her. Marius was scared. When he asked her what was wrong, she didn't move. In fact, she didn't seem to hear him at all. It was like she was no longer there anymore. Her brown eyes usually so full of life now empty. The next day she was chatty and pleasant, but Marius now saw emptiness in her eyes where there once was life, and when she spoke, there was a certain softness to her voice, like she had been defeated.
He never did find out what happened that night, but he knew it wasn't the first or last time something like it occurred. After that night, he knew Eponine's life was cold and dark, yet, she was unafraid.
Suddenly Marius felt a tear roll down his cheek. How stupid he had been to let his little Ponine follow him to the barricades. He should have noticed her sooner, he should have stopped her. He brushed a strand of her deep brown hair away from her face. Why did she do this? Why did she give her life to him?
"People don't belong to people." Eponine once said when Marius was telling her about "his" Cosette. "Well they do sometimes, but only when they're not enough of a person to complete themselves, and once you belong to someone it's miserable. You're good enough to complete yourself." She told him in a grave voice, gazing at the ground with such sadness Marius just wanted to reach out and hold her.
"You're right," Marius told her. "Well you're half right, I belong to Cosette because I want to, but I would never want anyone to ever have to belong to me. How terrible?"
Eponine just smiled, a sad empty smile. "Unfortunately Monsieur you cannot choose who has given themselves to you already." And with that Eponine left.
This memory made Marius cry harder because it was just too sad to think the most whole person he knew, didn't think she was good enough for anything. Eponine didn't even think she was good enough to be with him. This was the last time he spoke to Eponine before the barricades. He would give anything to see those eyes again, just one more time, so full of life.
Marius was so focused on Eponine he hardly heard Grantaire come from behind him and put his hand on his shoulder.
"She's happier now" Grantaire told him. "She's been dead for a long time now, her will to live escaped her back when she was only a girl."
Marius looked up, tears streaking his face, "But I wish I could have helped her, or saved her or something, she didn't need to die like this she should have let me die instead."
Grantaire smiled. "You saved her every day. She loved you, and you were there for her when she needed you. Your happiness was more important than her own, and I guess your life was too."
"But oh how I talked of Cosette must have made her feel terrible! And I made her find the house for me, I'm terrible and she was so good!" Marius said now not even trying to stop the tears from falling. He kept frantically feeling for a pulse, feeling for a breath. Ponine had to live!
However, Eponine didn't stir, she was gone forever, and Marius knew he had to let her go, so she could be happy with God.
Marius looked up and Grantiare had walked away to give him his last few moments with Eponine alone.
"She loved me." Thought Marius. "She loved me all along." Marius smiled. "Eponine Thenardier, thank you for gracing me with your presence for all these years, I do believe I was a little in love with you too." He kissed her icy cold forehead for the last time, and he was glad he was able to know what true happiness felt like, even if only for a second.
Please please please please let me know what you think! I really want to improve my writing to the best it can be. Thank you so much :)