So.

I've kinda hit a wall with Unknown Soldiers (not that anyone seems to care), so I'm starting something new. This is gonna be my biggest project ever. A Legend of Zelda oneshot every week. For 104 weeks. In other words, two years. I'm going to be thoroughly sick of it by the end of this.

Basically the way it works is this: Every Saturday I go onto a random word generator and get my word. Then I have a week to write a oneshot related to that word. The next Saturday, I post the oneshot and get the next word. You guys can suggest any pairing or AU you want; in fact, with two years ahead of me, I'm gonna need the help!

So without further ado, let's begin!

Disclaimed.

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1: Wardrobe
Saving the world is all well and good, but what does one wear to a goddess' ball?

"Link."

"Yes, Zelda?"

"I'm going to throw a ball to commemorate the completion of the castle."

"Good for you."

"You're going to be there."

"Of course I am."

"And you're not wearing your uniform."

"What?!"

Zelda has to laugh at the utterly stricken look on her old friend's face. He looks like she told him she'd killed his Loftwing, rather than informed him he can't wear the uniform he's been wearing for Farore-knows-how-long to a formal occasion. "You are not wearing your uniform."

"But Zelda-!" he whines. "My uniform is special! I saved the world in this uniform! You can't take it from me!" He looks like he's about to start crying.

The goddess merely rolls her eyes. "You're not a child, Link. You're almost twenty. And I know you have a perfectly serviceable wardrobe full of clothes in your rooms. Just pick something."

He drops his head, sticking out his lower lip. "Yes, Your Grace…" Then he wanders off in the general direction of his rooms.

"What was that all about?" a new voice asks.

Zelda turns. "Hey, Groose, good to see you. Link's upset because I told him he couldn't wear his uniform to my ball."

The redhead chuckles. "Of course. It'll be weird to see him in something else at this point. I swear he never takes that thing off."

"He says it's his good luck charm." Zelda rolls her eyes again. "I can't wait to see what he does now."

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Having spent two hours combing his wardrobe, then his bags, then the rest of his room, Link has come to a conclusion. Other than his uniform, he has nothing to wear to a formal ball.

"Oh, goody," he mutters. "Just this once, why couldn't Zelda make it easy for me?"

Of course she couldn't. That would be too simple. She has an annoying tendency to forgot that he saved the entire world. Surely that means he can wear whatever he likes to a ball?

Except… not. Because Zelda is a goddess, which means she can do whatever she likes. So now he has to find something suitably formal to wear.

This will be harder than fighting Demise. Link is not a formal person. In fact, his uniform is the most formal outfit he has! But that's not an option, apparently, so he has to think of something else.

He could borrow something off someone else, make something on his own, or just buy a jacket or something and throw it over his other clothes. But everyone he knows is either a girl or taller than him, so that's not really an option… And buying things is too simple, so that leaves making something.

He can borrow—read: steal—some fabric off of Zelda and cobble something together… The ball is in three weeks, so that would be… a bit rushed, maybe, but doable…

Link grins. This will be interesting.

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"Link? Why are you inside your wardrobe?"

Link jumps, banging his head on the top of his wardrobe and falling out onto the floor. "Ow! Hey, Groose. What brings you here?"

The other teen shrugs. "Boredom. Seriously, what were you doing in there?"

"Plotting world domination," comes the airy reply.

"Ha ha. What were you doing?"

Link groans, sitting up and running a hand over his face. "Working on my outfit for Zelda's ball. What else?"

Groose stares at him. "You do know that's tomorrow, right?"

"Oh, I know," the hero assures him. "That's why I'm panicking."

"You don't look like you're panicking."

"Nope. But trust me, I am." He grins ruefully. "Give me a Demon King any day."

"Instead of sewing?"

"Instead of Zelda's face when I tell her I haven't finished." He smirks. "But her face if I do finish will be brilliant. She may kill me."

Groose knows better than to ask the shorter man questions at this point. Plus, if he doesn't know, Zelda can't kill him for it later. Well, she can, but she probably won't. "Alright, then. Good luck."

"Feel free to stick around," Link invites. "I could use the company. And I think Crim's mad at me; he hasn't come down from Skyloft for a while." He ducks back into the wardrobe as he speaks. Why he's making his outfit inside the wardrobe is beyond Groose, but then, heroes are a strange breed.

"…Why are you doing this inside the wardrobe?"

"Because if I'm outside the wardrobe, people will see it. That'll ruin the surprise." Link says this in the tone of someone explaining something that should be obvious. Groose ignores that.

"Well, it's somewhat logical, so I guess I'll accept that." He runs a hand across his pompadour with a sigh. "Why will Zelda kill you when she sees this outfit of yours?"

"She'll think I'm mocking her previous champion. Which is kind of mocking myself, if I understood her description properly…"

Groose doesn't ask about that. Some things are best left to the hero and the goddess to think about. "Are you mocking him?"

"I prefer to thinking of it as reliving the legend. And getting around her restriction on my uniform."

So technically yes, but not exactly. "Alright, then. I'll just… leave you to it."

Link waves, but doesn't otherwise reply. Groose can't help but wonder if this is the last time he'll see his friend alive.

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"What did I say?"

"You said I couldn't wear my uniform."

"And what did you do?"

"Well, I'm not wearing my uniform."

Zelda has to admit that he has a point. But he doesn't have to look quite so pleased about it!

Link, after much deliberation, chose to wear a formal version of the Ancient Hero's uniform, with a long green robe, white shirt, brown leggings, and that red scarf Hylia remembers so fondly draped around his shoulders. At least he left out the hat.

Technically, he obeyed her. Well, he obeyed the letter of the law, if not the spirit. And she has missed that scarf…

She grabs it and pulls hard, nearly dragging the hero to the ground. "You knew what I meant, Link."

"Did I?" He's going to play innocent. She sighs, releasing the scarf and letting him back away with his typical wide-eyed grin. "Come now, Zelda. You can't say I don't wear it well…"

"No, I can't say that," she admits. Then she glares at him. "I can, however, get you in serious trouble for disobeying a goddess…"

She gives him a five second head start in consideration for his hard work. Then the ball is partially ruined by various screams as she makes her old friend suffer.

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That was… interesting. I did good, yes? Yes?

…It involves wardrobes. So I passed the first week. Only 103 to go!

I am so fucked. Oh well. At least I have a plan for next week's already. A very vague plan, but a plan all the same.

Next time: Laugh
He thinks his biggest accomplishment is making him laugh.

See ya~!

-Bird