Dipper's heart beat fast. This was the moment he'd been waiting for forever. Wendy was so close to him. Finally… After all this time, they… she was going to...

Wendy was finally going to loan him five bucks.

Dipper jumped up happily. "YES~"

"OH DIPPER-CHAN!"

"YES WENDY-DARLING?~" Dipper became Mettaton out of nowhere.

A barfing gnome appeared, and said he was Mettaton's cousin, Naptstabloooooooooooooook

"Waow blooky iz it rlly u" MettaDipper cried happily, posing fabulously in his short shjorts and SHUT UP I CAN SPELL PROPERLY

"Why yes it's widdle ol' me!"

"Gideenon?!" Maybe screemed.

Robbie poofed out of nowhere and said that he shouldn't be happening!

"WHY IS THIS HAPPENING MY EX-GIRLFRIEND SHOULDN'T LOAN ANYONE MONEEEEEEEY! I DESERVE ALL HER MONEY!"

"Wait, you were dating me just for my money?" Wendy asked incredulously. "Wow… you must have been REALLY poor…"

Then STan pops out of nowhere, complimenting Robbie as a money grunbbbing miser. "You learned so much from me kid I'm so proud!"

"Yes, grandpa!" Robbie said. THUS THE PLOT TWIST WUZ REVELED: ROBBY IS SATAN'S GRANDCJILD! That meens he iz also related to Dooper and Mable!

And then, with a dramatic music number playing from nonexistent speakers, soos appears.

"BUT I WANT TO BE UR SON, STATATANTANTA!"

"I thought u wanted 2 be my lover" Stan said confuzed.

"Luvr and sooon!"

"Wewlp I see nothinh wrong with tha" so satan adopted soos as his cgild and then they were a couople.

"YOU AR ETH LIGHT OF MY LIEQ!" soos sobbed happoly.

"But I was ur light, STanford!" Gideenon

"NMy nameis stanhy, giddeeenlononlkdfbhgkdffbn"

"You dont even kno my name" gideenon sobbed cuz he wuz so sdad. He had alwayz luved stan and he only pretedned 2 luv mabele becauz he wanted 2 try and get over his luv for SAtan.

HUNKLE STAN borfed. "But gideenon"

He was interruptededded when wendyl had these heart thigns apeear in her eyes like animu pepeos do. She screeemed "HUNGLE KINGLEA SATANA!" Funning up to the man and throwing herself in his embrace. "I REELIZED I WAS IN LUV WITH U ALL ALONG!"

"Oh no" hunkle Satana was sad because he had so many people who liked him but he had 2 brake there hearts. "I dont know who to choose" he cried.

"HEYA PI NETREEEEE" Bill scrreeetched. ":WANNA GO ON A DATE WITH ME!?"

Dipper punched Bill in the face and gave him a black eye.

"NUUU MY ONLY I"

Dipper grew animu sparkles in his eyes, and like Shmipper and Shmable, he said, "I wuv u wendypie… y u no come back to meh?"

"Becauz this is da man 4 me!" she sobbed and fell into a ball on the ground and jus cried 4 a rlly long tiem. "I LUV STAN!"

Dooper angsted.

Then candy ran up to every1 and giggled. "I just came back from my third moon trip!"

The end