I Hate You, My Darling
"What were you thinking!? I mean, hitting on a taken man! Are you stupid?" Hilde stared down at her feet. What was this person telling her? It seemed so... wrong. She couldn't think of another word for it. How could Duo -Her Duo, no less- be... taken? It was last year, she remembered, that this had all started. It started with those damned three words, and she wished they'd never been uttered. Or that she could alter the structure of the sentence in some way, so that it was different, had a different meaning, a difference... In anything. She sighed looking back up at this lie she called her life. The person in front of her had cold eyes. Dark hair, and cold eyes... But it wasn't Heero. It wasn't even a person, really. A mirror. She stared back into the heartless eyes, decieving her once more as it told her all the things she had done wrong. She desperately wanted to silence the voice- hide it away, kill it, destroy it. She couldn't, it was a part of her, always had been and always would. It was her conscience. Hilde's bangs flew erratically as she slammed her head into her hands, on top of her wardrobe.
"Duo." Hilde drew her arms around the pilot, his arms caressing her shoulders, her essence. She smiled and brought him closer, into a hug. Over his shoulder she could see his chestnut braid, which seemed so carefully looked after, she almost envied him for having such perfect hair. Duo looked up in mild suprise, but a smile lit up his face. It was a beacon of hope, a ray of light that Hilde never wanted to fade.
But it did.
"Duo... I love you, Duo." These words blew everything out from under them. The smile faded, their arms dropped. The pilot didn't respond. No more words were uttered, and Hilde felt the faint glistening of tears in her eyes. 'Say it Duo, say I love you back... Duo...' Hilde chided him on in her mind, hoping, wishing, wanting him to respond, somehow. He looked down, and Hilde knew this false joy was over. Duo shook his head, in shock. 'Hilde, what are you saying? You can't love me. I barely even have a soul anymore..' Duo turned whistfully, and felt himself brimming with sadness as well. His words came out harshly, like nails on a chalkboard.
"I'm sorry Hilde," He said flatly, outwardly. "I'm sorry." Hilde felt her fists clench. It wasn't supposed to end this way, not now, not ever. Not like this, anyway. If at all, it would be over her dead body.
"No." Duo looked down, suprised, possibly even hurt, Hilde noted, but trying to conceal his emotions.
"I'm sorry."
It was then that Hilde ran. She ran long and hard, harder than she could ever remember, even in a race. Her heart pounded inside her chest, and tears stung her cheeks. She didn't care where she was going, it didn't matter, so long as she got out of HERE. She would rather be anywhere than HERE. There, where, any place would do. In front of her, a light shone, a beacon of light, like Duo's smile, she thought sadly. She turned slightly, which decreased her stability and angility for a mere second, which was all the ground needed to conspire with her shoes and to add insult to injury. Hilde fell with a sickening crack, and duelly noted that she had probably fractured her wrist, not that it mattered. Dusting herself off with her one good hand, Hilde stood back up, ignoring the pain in her wrist, the pain that threatened to overtake her along with the pain of losing Duo. How could she have said those three little words, and so soon? She knew all too well in her heart that he wouldn't have returned the favor. So why did she say it?
She glanced back over to the light, and noticed it had gone out. Hilde wiped the tears from her face impassively, and started down the road for home.
*****
Uhhh.... Okay, let me explain this one. Geez, that's going to be difficult. You see, I wrote this one morning, ((Actually just before I typed this little blurb..)) when I was feeling really... weird, I guess would be the word. So this is from Hilde's POV, and I just wanted to know what you all thought about it. I may or may not continue, but I probably will nayway for my own amusement!!!! So have fun with it, OK?
Secondly... I'll dedicate this fic to my pal Umi, who managed to actually sign my last poem!! Rah, rah rah!! Lol. Okay, I'm just a little bit hyper!!!!
Third... =P I can't think of anything... But I might not be able to update untill after I hand in my huge science project... Unless that is, I GET ALOT OF REVIEWS THAT INSPIRE ME TO WRITE. ..::hint, hint...::.. Lol, I'm soooo subtle. Anyway, please review! Thanks! ^_~ Luv to all. Hehe. Or Shi ne, if anyone knows what that means. =D Sore wa himitsu desu!!!
"What were you thinking!? I mean, hitting on a taken man! Are you stupid?" Hilde stared down at her feet. What was this person telling her? It seemed so... wrong. She couldn't think of another word for it. How could Duo -Her Duo, no less- be... taken? It was last year, she remembered, that this had all started. It started with those damned three words, and she wished they'd never been uttered. Or that she could alter the structure of the sentence in some way, so that it was different, had a different meaning, a difference... In anything. She sighed looking back up at this lie she called her life. The person in front of her had cold eyes. Dark hair, and cold eyes... But it wasn't Heero. It wasn't even a person, really. A mirror. She stared back into the heartless eyes, decieving her once more as it told her all the things she had done wrong. She desperately wanted to silence the voice- hide it away, kill it, destroy it. She couldn't, it was a part of her, always had been and always would. It was her conscience. Hilde's bangs flew erratically as she slammed her head into her hands, on top of her wardrobe.
"Duo." Hilde drew her arms around the pilot, his arms caressing her shoulders, her essence. She smiled and brought him closer, into a hug. Over his shoulder she could see his chestnut braid, which seemed so carefully looked after, she almost envied him for having such perfect hair. Duo looked up in mild suprise, but a smile lit up his face. It was a beacon of hope, a ray of light that Hilde never wanted to fade.
But it did.
"Duo... I love you, Duo." These words blew everything out from under them. The smile faded, their arms dropped. The pilot didn't respond. No more words were uttered, and Hilde felt the faint glistening of tears in her eyes. 'Say it Duo, say I love you back... Duo...' Hilde chided him on in her mind, hoping, wishing, wanting him to respond, somehow. He looked down, and Hilde knew this false joy was over. Duo shook his head, in shock. 'Hilde, what are you saying? You can't love me. I barely even have a soul anymore..' Duo turned whistfully, and felt himself brimming with sadness as well. His words came out harshly, like nails on a chalkboard.
"I'm sorry Hilde," He said flatly, outwardly. "I'm sorry." Hilde felt her fists clench. It wasn't supposed to end this way, not now, not ever. Not like this, anyway. If at all, it would be over her dead body.
"No." Duo looked down, suprised, possibly even hurt, Hilde noted, but trying to conceal his emotions.
"I'm sorry."
It was then that Hilde ran. She ran long and hard, harder than she could ever remember, even in a race. Her heart pounded inside her chest, and tears stung her cheeks. She didn't care where she was going, it didn't matter, so long as she got out of HERE. She would rather be anywhere than HERE. There, where, any place would do. In front of her, a light shone, a beacon of light, like Duo's smile, she thought sadly. She turned slightly, which decreased her stability and angility for a mere second, which was all the ground needed to conspire with her shoes and to add insult to injury. Hilde fell with a sickening crack, and duelly noted that she had probably fractured her wrist, not that it mattered. Dusting herself off with her one good hand, Hilde stood back up, ignoring the pain in her wrist, the pain that threatened to overtake her along with the pain of losing Duo. How could she have said those three little words, and so soon? She knew all too well in her heart that he wouldn't have returned the favor. So why did she say it?
She glanced back over to the light, and noticed it had gone out. Hilde wiped the tears from her face impassively, and started down the road for home.
*****
Uhhh.... Okay, let me explain this one. Geez, that's going to be difficult. You see, I wrote this one morning, ((Actually just before I typed this little blurb..)) when I was feeling really... weird, I guess would be the word. So this is from Hilde's POV, and I just wanted to know what you all thought about it. I may or may not continue, but I probably will nayway for my own amusement!!!! So have fun with it, OK?
Secondly... I'll dedicate this fic to my pal Umi, who managed to actually sign my last poem!! Rah, rah rah!! Lol. Okay, I'm just a little bit hyper!!!!
Third... =P I can't think of anything... But I might not be able to update untill after I hand in my huge science project... Unless that is, I GET ALOT OF REVIEWS THAT INSPIRE ME TO WRITE. ..::hint, hint...::.. Lol, I'm soooo subtle. Anyway, please review! Thanks! ^_~ Luv to all. Hehe. Or Shi ne, if anyone knows what that means. =D Sore wa himitsu desu!!!