**Almost all of these characters are not mine. They belong to the esteemed
J.K. Rowlings. Jamie, however, is my own creation, so I trust you will not
use her in any of YOUR stories. Thank you.**
"August 31st, 1996 A.D.
Dear Mum and Dad,
I'm at Hogwarts now. I'm never going to see Salem again. Yes! Yes! YES! That place was AWFUL! I was an...um.... "lab rat" for lack of better term because of my... um .temper. But I'm out of there now! YES!
Guess what! My godfather (you know who he is) isn't a werewolf anymore! (Yes, Dad. It's still his Animagi form.) But you have to be 21 to get the cure, drat it! I haven't lived with him since I was 12, even though he's my legal guardian. He's teaching again at Hogwarts, Defense Against the Dark Arts. Dad, I'm aware that this subject isn't your favorite, but I'm good at it anyway.
Mum, everyone is saying I look a lot like you. Remus let me look at a photo of you when you were sixteen. You and I look almost exactly alike, 'except for the eyes', everyone points out, 'she has James's eyes.' Personally, I'm glad I look like you two.
I miss you lots. How would life be like if you hadn't died? Harry Potter, the famous kid, any relation? Hmmm... Potter.. He can't be related to me. Remus is my guardian because I have no other (living, sorry,) family.
Or could he be? (An awkward silence would probably be right about here, no?)
I'm really angry with Vol... HIM for doing this to you. (I didn't write it 'cause I can't spell it)! There was news of more attacks today, but I really can't keep track of all of them. As soon as the Ministry announced to the public that HE was back, the attacks were happening left and right. I can't do anything to stop it! The Order of the Phoenix won't induct people who aren't out of school yet! I feel so HELPLESS!
I miss you everyday. When are you coming back? Stupid question. Never.
Love,
Jamie
PS. Big hugs for both of you...And Sirius too.
PPS. While I'm talking about him, please tell Sirius that I say hello and we (Remus, Dumbledore, and I) miss him lots and lots. Things aren't the same without him around.
PPPS. I'm not supposed to know this, but Remus cries every night. He wakes up with big, blotchy eyes so it's not really that hard to miss. He won't talk to me about it, but I think it's cause he misses you two and Sirius. It's not funny at all, and I really shouldn't be talking. See, Remus isn't the only one who cries themselves to sleep..."
I stopped writing, brushing a stray tear from my eye. Sirius had been killed by Death Eaters a few months ago. He had thought I was dead for awhile; everyone but Remus had. Then, last year, Remus had told Sirius who and where I was. Sirius had written me owls and occasionally I escaped from SWI and visited him. We had been really good friends, but everything came to a heart-rending stop. He was killed while trying to rescue Harry Potter from the Department of Mysteries. Murdered by Belllatrix Lestrange, another Azkaban escapee, who was very, very guilty of being a Death Eater. She still was on the loose, and as Sirius had never been cleared...
I pushed the paper away and put the pen and quill aside as I laid my head down on the desk and wept. The wound was still open. I was still easily hurt by the mention of his name. Friends in this day and age were hard to come by. I think I've only had a handful of friends in my entire life. Sirius was one of them. I MISSED him so much that it hurt. It never hurt like this for my parents, but I was only a year old and they died almost fifteen years ago so I can't remember them very well.
"But at least I had the chance to say good bye to him," I thought bitterly, "But does good bye really mean anything? "
I still was afraid to let Remus out of my sight, even nearly two months after Sirius's death. I was still afraid that if I wandered too far away for too long, I was going to come back and Remus was going to be dead. I was scared that I would never say good bye, never get the chance to tell him until it was too late... Remus was the only family that I had left, and I knew that I could never make it without him.
I hadn't ever admitted to this, but I was beginning to think I should tell. After all, next time I might not be so lucky as to have a chance to say good bye...
"Jamie? Are you okay?"
Remus was standing next to me, his hazel eyes full of concern. Worry had made his hair go almost all grey, and had carved deep lines in his forehead. He put one hand on my shoulder.
"I'm okay, Remus. No, really, I am."
Remus raised one eyebrow. I was not a very convincing liar, and both of us knew it.
"Okay, so I'm not. But there's nothing I can do about it! Sirius's gone, irretrievably, irrevocably gone! And nothing I do or say can bring him back."
"So it's not just me that's feeling that way..." Remus whispered sounding a little relieved.
He heaved a deep sigh, then pulled up another chair behind his desk. He sat down next to me and glanced at the letter. "You still writing your parents?"
"Yeah, but I stopped sending the letters after you told me why Stupid kept coming back with them... I've saved everyone of them... just in case...you know, the recipients ever get a chance to read them..."
"They won't ever be able too, Jamie. You know that."
"So? Dreams and you are all I got left now. And I don't want to let go of either. So don't plan on going anywhere anytime soon.
" I need you here, Remus. And I know I'm an ungrateful little snitch sometimes...okay, a lot of times, but really, it's not your fault at all! Please, don't disappear on me now. I really need you, no matter what happens!"
Remus embraced me, and I let him. It's been a long time since my godfather last hugged me, and to tell the truth, I've actually kind of missed it. He held me there for a while, hands clamped around my back as if he was never going to let go. I didn't mind at all.
"Jamie?" Remus asked finally.
"What?"
"I'm afraid that I can't promise anything, Jamie. I don't know what's going to happen. I'm not sure about anything anymore..."
"ANYTHING?" I asked him, stunned, braking away from his hug, "ANYTHING? You just think that I'm going to let you say that?"
"I take it back, Jae," Remus said, using my old nickname, "I know that there are some things that I can count on."
"Taxes, death and Dumbledore...and me,"
"Yeah," he ruffled my hair affectionately, "And you... Would you mind if I read your letter?"
"No," I answered, since Remus hadn't asked to read the letters since I was seven.
Then I remembered the PPPS and regretted it. But there was no way that I could take it back and explain it to Remus. Besides, he was a fast reader and was already handing it back to me a minute later. "And?" I asked.
"One, it's really good writing. Two, I never realized that you would notice me crying. Three, You talk to them as if they were still alive. And four..."
"Four?"
"I have an answer to your question."
"What question?"
" The 'Is Harry Potter Related to Me' question."
"Oh. He's not, is he?" I looked at Remus's face. "Oh...my...No! Really?"
"Really. He's your brother, Jae."
"My...brother? That's impossible! All my family's dead!"
"Very funny. Now do you want to know about this or not?"
"YEAH! How come nobody mentioned him to me before?"
"Dumbledore's orders. You too aren't technically supposed to know about each other. It was safer, in case Voldemort got a hold of one of you, you wouldn't know about the other...But it doesn't really matter anymore..."
"Why?" I wondered. "Why keep a secret for sixteen years and NOW tell?"
Remus shook his head. "You don't get it do you, Jae?"
"No!"
"Remember, Sirius died in the Department of Mysteries?"
"Yeah, but I don't see what that has to..."
"Hear me out, Jamie!" Remus commanded, "Sirius knew about you, who you are... who you are related too... Some Death Eaters can look into people's minds and find out things...and live to tell their master about it..."
"So the reason it doesn't matter if I know I have a brother," I asked slowly, "is because Voldemort already knows?"
I could tell by the worried look on Remus's face that the answer was "yes" . After all, next time it might be Harry or I, and he might not be so lucky as to have a chance to say good bye ...
"August 31st, 1996 A.D.
Dear Mum and Dad,
I'm at Hogwarts now. I'm never going to see Salem again. Yes! Yes! YES! That place was AWFUL! I was an...um.... "lab rat" for lack of better term because of my... um .temper. But I'm out of there now! YES!
Guess what! My godfather (you know who he is) isn't a werewolf anymore! (Yes, Dad. It's still his Animagi form.) But you have to be 21 to get the cure, drat it! I haven't lived with him since I was 12, even though he's my legal guardian. He's teaching again at Hogwarts, Defense Against the Dark Arts. Dad, I'm aware that this subject isn't your favorite, but I'm good at it anyway.
Mum, everyone is saying I look a lot like you. Remus let me look at a photo of you when you were sixteen. You and I look almost exactly alike, 'except for the eyes', everyone points out, 'she has James's eyes.' Personally, I'm glad I look like you two.
I miss you lots. How would life be like if you hadn't died? Harry Potter, the famous kid, any relation? Hmmm... Potter.. He can't be related to me. Remus is my guardian because I have no other (living, sorry,) family.
Or could he be? (An awkward silence would probably be right about here, no?)
I'm really angry with Vol... HIM for doing this to you. (I didn't write it 'cause I can't spell it)! There was news of more attacks today, but I really can't keep track of all of them. As soon as the Ministry announced to the public that HE was back, the attacks were happening left and right. I can't do anything to stop it! The Order of the Phoenix won't induct people who aren't out of school yet! I feel so HELPLESS!
I miss you everyday. When are you coming back? Stupid question. Never.
Love,
Jamie
PS. Big hugs for both of you...And Sirius too.
PPS. While I'm talking about him, please tell Sirius that I say hello and we (Remus, Dumbledore, and I) miss him lots and lots. Things aren't the same without him around.
PPPS. I'm not supposed to know this, but Remus cries every night. He wakes up with big, blotchy eyes so it's not really that hard to miss. He won't talk to me about it, but I think it's cause he misses you two and Sirius. It's not funny at all, and I really shouldn't be talking. See, Remus isn't the only one who cries themselves to sleep..."
I stopped writing, brushing a stray tear from my eye. Sirius had been killed by Death Eaters a few months ago. He had thought I was dead for awhile; everyone but Remus had. Then, last year, Remus had told Sirius who and where I was. Sirius had written me owls and occasionally I escaped from SWI and visited him. We had been really good friends, but everything came to a heart-rending stop. He was killed while trying to rescue Harry Potter from the Department of Mysteries. Murdered by Belllatrix Lestrange, another Azkaban escapee, who was very, very guilty of being a Death Eater. She still was on the loose, and as Sirius had never been cleared...
I pushed the paper away and put the pen and quill aside as I laid my head down on the desk and wept. The wound was still open. I was still easily hurt by the mention of his name. Friends in this day and age were hard to come by. I think I've only had a handful of friends in my entire life. Sirius was one of them. I MISSED him so much that it hurt. It never hurt like this for my parents, but I was only a year old and they died almost fifteen years ago so I can't remember them very well.
"But at least I had the chance to say good bye to him," I thought bitterly, "But does good bye really mean anything? "
I still was afraid to let Remus out of my sight, even nearly two months after Sirius's death. I was still afraid that if I wandered too far away for too long, I was going to come back and Remus was going to be dead. I was scared that I would never say good bye, never get the chance to tell him until it was too late... Remus was the only family that I had left, and I knew that I could never make it without him.
I hadn't ever admitted to this, but I was beginning to think I should tell. After all, next time I might not be so lucky as to have a chance to say good bye...
"Jamie? Are you okay?"
Remus was standing next to me, his hazel eyes full of concern. Worry had made his hair go almost all grey, and had carved deep lines in his forehead. He put one hand on my shoulder.
"I'm okay, Remus. No, really, I am."
Remus raised one eyebrow. I was not a very convincing liar, and both of us knew it.
"Okay, so I'm not. But there's nothing I can do about it! Sirius's gone, irretrievably, irrevocably gone! And nothing I do or say can bring him back."
"So it's not just me that's feeling that way..." Remus whispered sounding a little relieved.
He heaved a deep sigh, then pulled up another chair behind his desk. He sat down next to me and glanced at the letter. "You still writing your parents?"
"Yeah, but I stopped sending the letters after you told me why Stupid kept coming back with them... I've saved everyone of them... just in case...you know, the recipients ever get a chance to read them..."
"They won't ever be able too, Jamie. You know that."
"So? Dreams and you are all I got left now. And I don't want to let go of either. So don't plan on going anywhere anytime soon.
" I need you here, Remus. And I know I'm an ungrateful little snitch sometimes...okay, a lot of times, but really, it's not your fault at all! Please, don't disappear on me now. I really need you, no matter what happens!"
Remus embraced me, and I let him. It's been a long time since my godfather last hugged me, and to tell the truth, I've actually kind of missed it. He held me there for a while, hands clamped around my back as if he was never going to let go. I didn't mind at all.
"Jamie?" Remus asked finally.
"What?"
"I'm afraid that I can't promise anything, Jamie. I don't know what's going to happen. I'm not sure about anything anymore..."
"ANYTHING?" I asked him, stunned, braking away from his hug, "ANYTHING? You just think that I'm going to let you say that?"
"I take it back, Jae," Remus said, using my old nickname, "I know that there are some things that I can count on."
"Taxes, death and Dumbledore...and me,"
"Yeah," he ruffled my hair affectionately, "And you... Would you mind if I read your letter?"
"No," I answered, since Remus hadn't asked to read the letters since I was seven.
Then I remembered the PPPS and regretted it. But there was no way that I could take it back and explain it to Remus. Besides, he was a fast reader and was already handing it back to me a minute later. "And?" I asked.
"One, it's really good writing. Two, I never realized that you would notice me crying. Three, You talk to them as if they were still alive. And four..."
"Four?"
"I have an answer to your question."
"What question?"
" The 'Is Harry Potter Related to Me' question."
"Oh. He's not, is he?" I looked at Remus's face. "Oh...my...No! Really?"
"Really. He's your brother, Jae."
"My...brother? That's impossible! All my family's dead!"
"Very funny. Now do you want to know about this or not?"
"YEAH! How come nobody mentioned him to me before?"
"Dumbledore's orders. You too aren't technically supposed to know about each other. It was safer, in case Voldemort got a hold of one of you, you wouldn't know about the other...But it doesn't really matter anymore..."
"Why?" I wondered. "Why keep a secret for sixteen years and NOW tell?"
Remus shook his head. "You don't get it do you, Jae?"
"No!"
"Remember, Sirius died in the Department of Mysteries?"
"Yeah, but I don't see what that has to..."
"Hear me out, Jamie!" Remus commanded, "Sirius knew about you, who you are... who you are related too... Some Death Eaters can look into people's minds and find out things...and live to tell their master about it..."
"So the reason it doesn't matter if I know I have a brother," I asked slowly, "is because Voldemort already knows?"
I could tell by the worried look on Remus's face that the answer was "yes" . After all, next time it might be Harry or I, and he might not be so lucky as to have a chance to say good bye ...