It had been a sunny day. The rays of the great heavenly object washing the land were especially warm, allowing a rare day of perfect weather. To knock it all off, the season of summer had just finished reintroducing itself, allowing fishing boats to leave and keep the village full with daily catches.
Toothless had been off—Hiccup remembered that. The dragon refused to leave, even when Hiccup had gotten the crazy idea of having Snoutlout bring Fireworm, his Monstrous Nightmare, in the front of the house and pretend to attack Hiccup. But no matter the circumstances, the results were the same; Toothless remained perched on a wooden beam in the shadows of the ceiling, never moving a single inch. He would occasionally croon, but other than that, nothing.
Having figured that maybe the dragon was feeling downtrodden or just downright angry with the world, Hiccup had shrugged it off and gone down to Gobber's smithy to help him work on some saddles that needed repairing. Toothless had tried to stop him, nervously tugging on the hem of his shirt. But he needed to work to get his pay, since the dragon's saddle rig was becoming rusty and Gobber had become very annoyed with Hiccup's taking of their precious supplies without leaving behind even a single coin.
The long walk had been silent and eerie, making Hiccup feel uneasy the entire way down the hill his house was perched on. He couldn't quite place it, but something seemed off and terribly wrong. Alarm bells rang inside his head for reasons he couldn't understand. His eyes involuntarily darted to and fro, the sky stilled above him, and he sidled past the lonely storage-house.
The relief of making it to the market was immense. Hiccup immediately relaxed in the company of others, shaking off his earlier fears as something silly produced from his overactive imagination. He made it to his workplace a lot slower than usual—he usually rode there—and proceeded to have a rather pleasant, albeit normal, work day, joking with Gobber and chatting with any passerby to the shop.
By afternoon, Hiccup decided to return to his home to check up on Toothless, who was alone. Chief Stoick and several other ships were off trading with other Viking clans, and instead of going, Hiccup was being tested by being temporarily put in charge. At first, he had been incredibly nervous, but things had gone surprisingly well. The trading ships were expected to return any day now and he'd managed to not burn down the entire village in their absence.
So he wasn't surprised at all to walk into a silent, dimly-lit house that hadn't changed once since early morning…
Hiccup briefly glanced up at the ceiling. Seeing no giant black mass roosting atop the wooden beams, he shrugged and made his way up to his room, the only other place in the house that Toothless actually liked. The single sounds of the house were the creaking of the steps and the shrill squeaks of his prosthetic—nothing out of the ordinary. As he was going up, though, he noticed that a part of the banister and floor by his room looked dark and grungy, like something dirty had lied down there for awhile. But the lighting of the second floor was too weak to fully determine what had happened. To Hiccup, it just looked like a bunch of dirt or clay had been dragged in by the resident dragon, who'd apparently gone outside after all. It did smell weird, though…
"Toothless…" Hiccup called out, sidestepping the dirt and pushing open his door. It groaned as it opened.
A pair of green eyes glared weakly back at him from atop his bed. The dragon was melding into the shadows, his form unclear except for the spikes of his folded wings and those brilliant, luminescent irises.
Frowning in concern, Hiccup slowly approached the silent dragon, lightly placing a hand on the beast's forehead when he was in reaching distance. Toothless was so still, he'd be thought of as dead. He was so silent, he may as well have been a statue. He was so cold, he could have been ice.
"Toothless? What's wrong, buddy?" Hiccup asked, panic sparking briefly in his heart. He slid his hands under the Night Fury's cheekbones, forcing him to lift his head. The dragon gave no response, only watching him with eyes that had turned yellow due to the lighting. His uncanny lack of enthusiasm at Hiccup's arrival set off the warning bells from before again.
"Tooth—" Hiccup began to repeat, reaching to scratch the dragon on his lower neck in his favorite spot.
Toothless sprung to life, screaming.
He fell off the bed and onto the ground, belly up, and thrashed madly, knocking over most of the furniture in the room. Hiccup screamed out the dragon's name and ran over to him in a heartbeat, kneeling next to him and fruitlessly attempting to hold the agonized animal's body down so he could see what in the gods' name was wrong.
When the Night Fury moved into a ray of sunlight supplied by the window, Hiccup gasped and recoiled. There, on the dragon's neck and torso, was a perfect, bloody, yellow-tinged outline of his saddle's skeleton—it looked almost like the framework of the contraption had come to life and bitten the dragon midflight. Even the parts of the rig that were covered with leather—though they still did hold the worn metal in need of repair beneath—were shown, though they were much fainter than where the exposed areas had been.
Hiccup desperately tried to keep Toothless from struggling any more, but his weak human strength was no match to that of a panicking dragon. Toothless' tail whipped up and smacked Hiccup right in the thigh, just above his stump. He fell back and doubled over, curling in on himself and hissing and cursing at the sudden pain in his leg. The Night Fury didn't even acknowledge him, too lost in his own pain.
The fit only lasted a couple minutes, but with his leg smarting (and subduing him) and Toothless' wails rising to a deafening volume, it felt like hours to Hiccup. All he knew was that he was suddenly aware of a sound that wasn't there anymore, that there was a dull throbbing in his left leg, and that his throat felt dry and hoarse. It took him a couple seconds to realize that he had been screaming, too.
A thick, putrid scent was stuffed inside the room; a quick scan revealed that Toothless had thrown up at one point. The bile looked unearthly and strange, tinted with streaks of blood.
And Toothless was…
Taking in a shaky, raspy voice, Hiccup scrambled to his feet and hobbled over to the still form of his companion, hidden in the shadows once more. His stomach dropped at how quiet everything had become—he was almost afraid to put his hand on Toothless' wing.
Shaking it off, Hiccup sprinted around the dragon's body and dropped to his knees, one hand on his neck, the other on his side. The boy slumped in relief when he felt both a pulse and the heaving of Toothless' chest. But they were so very weak.
Toothless' eyes fluttered open and he turned his head so that both eyes were resting on Hiccup. They were dim, the edges lined with red and veins popping, leaving little splotches that stood stark against the lime-green. A noise that Hiccup had learned to be something to convey fear—a sound he'd only heard a few times—weakly rose from the great beast's throat and his body went limp.
Hiccup hugged the dragon's head to his chest, mind working at hyperspeed, whispering false words of comfort and rubbing the spot between Toothless' ears. Where had the marks come from? They hadn't been on Toothless last night—or, at least, he hadn't seen them under the moonless sky. Why were they placed where only the metal parts of the saddle had been? Why did such thin, gruesome lines have this massive effect on his Night Fury? Should he go get help?
That last thought brought up the most dreadful question of all: what if Toothless died while he was gone to get help? Listening to the unsteady breathing and feeling the fluttering, halting heartbeat of his beast friend, he was forced to consider the possibility.
Hiccup opened eyes he hadn't known he'd squeezed shut and looked down at Toothless. The dragon's eyes were barely open and his breathing had become even weaker in the few minutes it took Hiccup's shocked mind to asses the situation. His limbs would shake rapidly in short bursts, and the lines of the saddle had opened and were leaving his side and neck blood-soaked.
With a heave, Hiccup set down Toothless' head and yanked the sheets off of his bed, returning to his friend and frantically pressing them against the wounds. Toothless whimpered upon contact.
"Ssshhh, it's going to be okay," Hiccup soothed, gently adding pressure to the cloths. He glanced over at Toothless, who had curled up so he could watch his human. The boy reached out a hand to pet his dragon's head again—and stopped.
His hand had turned crimson.
Horrified, the teenager snapped his head around to his 'bandages' with a disbelieving look. His mouth dropped open in horror at seeing the once-tan covers already soaked in a deep, sickly red.
Toothless moaned and heaved, frantically trying to breathe. Each gasp was visibly shallower than the last. Hiccup slumped over in shock and horror and buried his face in his hands, knowing that all of the healing herbs in his house had been thrown out when he'd found mold on them the other day, knowing that Toothless was dying from some strange illness never seen before, knowing that his house's lonely, secluded placement made it impossible to get healing supplies in time. Knowing that if he left, Toothless would die scared and in pain and utterly alone.
And then it all clicked.
The marks. Toothless' behavior this morning.
The rust on the saddle.
The metal had long-since turned red and orange, but most of it was covered by leather, and Toothless hadn't been bothered by it. It was only until it started creaking with every movement that he'd decided to repair it, and by then, the covering had been worn thin and even torn in some places. But Toothless had actually gotten mad at him when he'd taken the saddle, initiating a game of tug-of-war to try and wrestle it back from his human so that they could fly. He'd had no reason to think that it would cause this.
The constant exposure to it must have been toxic to dragons, rubbing the scales thin and causing the deep scratches—and once that toxin got into the bloodstream…
…and Toothless must have felt it earlier this morning, which was why he'd refused to leave. He'd known that something was wrong.
Hiccup heaved a sob, hugging the dragon's head tightly.
"I love you," he choked out, voice cracking. "More than anything in the world."
Toothless' intelligent, terrified eyes twisted up to him, almost overcome by red. He weakly flicked his now-dark, swollen tongue out and licked Hiccup on the chin. Then, apparently having no strength left, the Night Fury's weight dropped fully into Hiccup's arms. He closed his eyes and gave a weak rumble.
Hiccup tightly held onto Toothless' head, vision blurred from the tears that were running down his cheeks and landing on his dragon's eyebrow. "I love you. I love you," he gasped, attempting to pet the dragon but receiving no response. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry."
.
Later on that night, when Chief Stoick returned home after being at sea for two months, he walked in with a beaming grin and booming hello, ready to congratulate Hiccup on a wonderful job at keeping the village intact. He was caught completely off-guard when the answer he got was a long, sorrowful wail coming from his only son's room.
Stoick was up the stairs with his torch faster than his mind could perceive, gaping at the now-visible bloodstain on the ground and preparing himself for the worst.
Inside the room, his eyes fell on the wrecked form of Hiccup, still tightly hugging Toothless' limp head and whispering an endless mantra of "I'm sorry, I love you, I'm sorry".
Stoick sucked in a shaky breath, the weight of the situation crashing into him, and carefully stepped over to his son. He wordlessly embraced the mourning child, squeezing him tightly against his torso when the boy launched himself into his father's arms and screamed.
It wasn't until hours later that Hiccup had been able to shakily explain what had happened through tears, blaming himself the entire time. Stoick tried to comfort him, to tell him that nobody knew much about dragons and that this entire thing was impossible to predict. But Hiccup wouldn't listen.
Astrid found him in the cove that he'd befriended Toothless in. Hiccup was sitting on a rock, scratching in the dirt with a stick. When he'd finished his picture, he looked up and glanced around. A moment later the boy slumped and gave a barely-audible sigh, his forehead almost touching his knees.
The blonde frowned, eyebrows pulled down, and carefully guided Axie, her Nadder— who was sporting a new wooden saddle—over to her friend. "You're just torturing yourself here," she softly told him, unclipping herself from the mount and landing smoothly on the ground. The Nadder clicked her beak and shook her head, bringing her wings into a resting position and turning her head sideways to watch the both of them.
Hiccup gazed longingly at the dragon and dragged his pale green eyes to Astrid's with a visible effort. He said nothing.
In the silence, Astrid moved towards him and sat on the same stone as he was, placing a hand on his knee.
She waited for him to say something. Of course, he didn't. He hadn't been speaking much in the past month.
"Can you just try?" She asked, gesturing towards Axie. "You haven't been near one dragon at all—"
"I'm not getting another dragon."
The words were said with so much venom that Astrid was taken aback and Axie tensed. The two females stared at their friend worriedly, glancing at each other to make sure that the other was feeling the same way.
"Look, Hiccup," Astrid sighed, running her free hand through her hair. While their relationship hadn't lasted long, she and Hiccup had somehow managed to keep a solid friendship. She was the last person to confront Hiccup, though, because of their strained past. "I never said to do that. You don't have to ride one, or get a new one, or anything. But you do need to recover…and right now, you're just going backwards."
Hiccup stared at his feet, occasionally adding little details to the drawing of Toothless in the earth. His extremely delayed reaction was to shake his head vigorously. "No," he hissed, "I'm fine."
"You're not," Astrid stated. She squeezed Hiccup's knee and cupped her other hand under his cheek, turning his head towards her to force him to look at her. "You're killing yourself."
Those pale green eyes welled with agony and torment. "I killed Toothless," Hiccup whispered.
Astrid was shaking her head before he even finished his sentence. "No. No!" She said with resolve, forcing confidence into her voice. "It could have happened to anyone, Hiccup. You need to stop blaming yourself for a fluke! You didn't kill Toothless! Nobody did! It was an accident, and that's it."
Hiccup lowered his head, hiding his eyes under uncut, dull hair. His shoulders quivered slightly Astrid quickly brought her hands onto his shoulders, gazing at him sadly as he broke down right in front of her.
After several long moments, the dragon tamer finally wrapped his arms around Astrid's neck, burying his face into her shoulder and sobbing. She squeezed him tightly, rubbing his back and pressing her cheek against his matted hair. "It's okay, it's okay," she murmured, shifting her position a little to fully face Toothless' former rider.
Axie chose this moment to sit behind the two and nuzzle them both with a deafening purr. The dragoness knew that something was wrong—most dragons had figured out by now that humans leaked from their eyes when they were very sad—but didn't know what was the cause. Her kind nature simply told her to try and comfort the only two humans who had personally connected with her—though she only saw the male occasionally.
Astrid gave a weak smile and Hiccup stopped, turning his tear-soaked face to look at the gentle dragon. Slowly, he pushed himself away from Astrid, wiping his eyes and cheeks with the base of his palm. The teenager sniffed and looked up at Astrid's Nadder with half-lidded eyes, biting his lower lip when the dragon realized that it was he who was the one who was upset and focused all of her attention on him.
Axie sniffed at Hiccup's face, inches from it, and lowered her head and turned it to look at him worriedly. She chirped at the boy's lack of reactions, twitching her tail in agitation and ruffling her wings.
Hiccup looked at Astrid, completely lost. She nodded encouragingly and smiled, hope fluttering in her chest. "Go on."
Little by little, he raised his hand in halting steps, his fingers shaking and knocking into each other. Axie was perfectly calm, turning so that Hiccup was in her blind spot. He blinked several times at this and swallowed.
Then he placed his hand on her snout.
The teenager looked as if the weight of the world had been lifted off of his shoulders. He drooped back, an incredibly tiny smile on his face—but it was there. After a moment he removed his hand from the Nadder and wiped at his eyes, which had somehow generated even more tears.
Astrid beamed at him and wrapped an arm around his shoulders. "Feel any better?" She asked quietly, as if afraid that if she spoke too loudly, she would spook him.
Hiccup paused, glancing at Axie and then lowering his eyes to his feet. "I think…a little."
The blonde punched him in the arm and quickly pulled him into a hug before he could even yelp. "Good."
They shared a short embrace and Astrid pulled away, standing up and wiping her skirt. "Want to go for a ride?" She offered, holding a hand out. Maybe after that he'll be able to ride a dragon and get better—
Hiccup also stood, but shook his head. "No…no, I think I'm going to..." He stared off into space, sweeping the entire cove with his eyes like he was scared that it would disappear if he left. "I…can I be alone?"
Astrid thought about this for a moment. "No," she finally said. "You've been alone for too long. C'mon, let's go to Town Hall and get some food. You need it." As she said this, she grabbed his arm and yanked him forward, causing him to stumble and cry out in surprise. "I'm not leaving until you come," she added as an afterthought.
But instead of the usual sarcastic remark, he actually straightened out, and after a moment of consideration, gave her a small nod. They departed from the cove, Axie flying overhead and Astrid and Hiccup climbing out through a tiny crevice. When they reached the peak, Hiccup stopped and turned around, looking towards the cove.
"So long, buddy," he whispered.
The three took the long way home. The entire time, Hiccup's hand was placed on Axie's neck, rubbing her slightly and smiling softly.
Why, yes, I did add references to my other works!
Working on emotions. How'd I do?
I was listening to 'Finale' from the Tron Legacy soundtrack (which, by the way, completely blew me away!) and felt like writing something angsty to it.
I PROMISE my next oneshot will be nice and bright and fluffy. D: Sorry for flooding you guys with depressing things. But at least it ended on a bright note?
Hope you all liked it! (Or genuinely hated it!)
DISCLAIMER: I don't own How to Train Your Dragon. If I did, something like this would probably happen and…well, I'm pretty sure I'd be out of a job!