It's just a really short one-shot, something that I wrote for fun. Beware of the major innuendos. Rated T because K+ wasn't cool enough, or something.

Disclaimer: If I owned the 39 Clues, Isabel Kabra would've fallen off a cliff before the tenth book.


"I'm just a bit afraid, Ian. You see," she confessed, "it's my first time."

Ian looked at her, careful not to let the shock appear on his face. "It's your first time?" he asked.

Amy nodded, looking away from him bashfully. "I-yeah," she said. "I'm scared- what if I do something wrong?"

Dan Cahill was walking past his the bedroom door that was left slightly ajar when he heard his sister's voice. What was she talking about? He paused for a minute to hear what Ian's answer was.

Ian looked at the girl laying next to him. "Don't worry, Amy," he said confidently. "It'll be fine. Remember, I'll be with you the whole time. We'll do it together."

Amy looked at him. "Promise?" she asked.

"Promise," he said. "I've done it thousands of times before."

Dan didn't know whether to scream or run or go find a samurai sword and a memory potion so he could destroy Ian with the sword and use the potion to relieve his mind from the horrible things he was hearing. His body, however, forced him to stay and hear what Amy would say to Ian's disgusting profession.

"Oh," she said, sounding grateful. "Well, that's good. My first time, and I'll be doing it with an expert."

Ian smiled at her. "Lucky you."

"Lucky me, indeed," she said. "Is there anything I need to wear, specifically, maybe like-

"No, love," he said, amused. "Such a worrier. You won't need to wear anything, specifically."

Dan fell to the ground and being retching.

"Alright, then," Amy said sounding considerably less nervous than before. "Then I'll be right back, okay? I've got to go to the restroom," she excused herself, then walked out of the door, not paying much heed to her thirteen year-old brother who was rolling around on the floor, looking like he wanted to commit seppuku.

When she came back, she noticed Dan was gone. She didn't wonder too much about where he had gone, and when she heard the door slam downstairs she assumed he had gone to Matthew or Roland or one of his friend's house.

"Okay, love," she called to Ian. "Ready?"

He sprung up. "Let's go," he said. "Let's do this."


Claire, the newly-hired salesperson, stood inside Bath and Body Works, warmly welcoming customers while handing out little baskets for them to keep their selected items in.

"Hello, welcome to Bath and Body Works," she greeted to the old lady in purple flowered capris. "Would you like a bag?" The lady obliged.

The little bell on top of the door rung again and Claire turned to the door, a good-natured smile plastered onto her face, ready to welcome the next customer.

The next customer, however, turned out to be a teenage boy with lovely green eyes. He was as pale as a ghost, though, and looked as though he had just seen one. He was carrying what looked like a ninja's sword, and Claire couldn't be sure whether it was real or not.

"Hello, welcome-

"You wouldn't happen to have a memory destroying potion here, would you?" he asked hurriedly, getting straight to the point.

"I-er, no, sorry," she said, not used to such questions being asked to her. She was new to the job, after all. But the poor boy looked so dejected at her negative response, she thought she should do something to make him feel better.

"Don't worry," she said hesitantly. "I'm sure you'll find, um, a memory destroying potion somewhere," she said.

He sighed, fingering his ninja sword.

Then Claire remembered that she worked at Bath and Body Works, and couldn't just let a customer go without trying to get him to buy something.

"But since you're here, do you want to buy something?" she asked brightly. "Perhaps for a cousin, or maybe you have a sister?"

The boy paled even more, if possible. "Sister-Ian-sister-commit seppuku," he began spluttering.

Claire gulped. Was this boy mentally stable? She looked at him, and then at the ninja sword in his hand. Was it safe for him to have that?

"Uh, sir," she asked tentatively, "Is that sword real?"

His eyes flashed and he looked up at her, his blue-hoodie clad arm pointing the sword up at her. "Wouldn't you like to know," he said ominously.

Then he disappeared out the door, the bell ringing as it closed.

Claire stared at the door for a minute in shock, till it opened again and another customer walked in, this one a tall blonde lady with pearls in her ears.

"Hello, welcome to Bath and Body Works. Would you like a bag?"


"That was really fun," Amy told Ian. "Let's do it again sometime, okay?"

He grinned. "Of course. Bowling is always fun, I told you!"

"Yeah," she said. "And there I was, all worried for nothing."

"When you're with the bowling expert, there's nothing to ever worry about," he said. "Have a nice night, love."

He kissed her chastely on her front porch, then drove off.

Amy smiled to herself. Overall, she'd had a nice day.

Though, strangely, Dan wouldn't talk to her for the next four days; every time she said something to him he'd turn a nauseating green and sprint upstairs to his room, muttering something about a memory destroying potion.


Review, please, even if it's to tell me that if I continue to write you'll murder me in my sleep.