Hi people!

So this hit me in the middle on the night, while I was watching cat videos. (Everybody does, no judging). And Jesus, cats on a waterbed are just hilarious! So, yeah.

I was thinking they were not enough fics around (or I don't know where to look, which is possible too) where we could see Minerva in her animagus acting like a cat, and so I thought, hell, I'm gonna write it.

So this will be a series of one-shot, updated very randomly (when the urge hits me, really). It is crack, obviously, and very OOC (for Minerva, anyway).

This one features Minerva and Hermione as a couple (most of them will).

Enjoy!

She was once again at her girlfriend's, for a lack of better word. She still didn't know the appropriate way to call Hermione. Girlfriend seemed too childish for her, but she couldn't call her wife, not yet, or betrothed; so she didn't know quite right how to address her, and girlfriend would have to do for now.

She was waiting for Hermione to return, having left in a hurry because of a problem at the Ministry — and Minerva was proud of her girl, she had made such a good life for herself, and Merlin was she glad she had a part in it — therefore leaving her … girlfriend alone in her apartment. They didn't live together, not yet, mainly because Minerva lived at Hogwarts, and that the castle couldn't be their home, if they were not married. The Headmistress was thinking about proposing, before for now she was still a little too insecure. She couldn't quite yet believe Hermione will still choose her, a few years later. After all, she was young, she had other things to live than to trap herself in an unwanted relationship, especially with someone as old as Minerva. "You're not old, Minerva." Hermione would say. Yes, well, fact was she was old, or at least, older than Hermione — not that it was hard, as Rolanda Hooch would love to tease her — and that's that.

Not that it mattered at the moment, anyway. She was sitting on the couch, looking around her in a kind of awe. She had been here countless times, and still she couldn't help but wonder that the technology displayed around her. Hermione mixed muggle and wizard technology well, of course, and it was very entertaining. She looked at the clock, and decided she had enough time before Hermione got back. Slowly, she morphed, still on the couch, and a few seconds later, a small tabby cat was sitting in her place.

She liked her animagus. She liked to see, and feel the world as a cat, and she felt that lately, she wasn't using her form enough. Of course she still ran in the castle on four legs, but around Hermione, she avoided changing form. It didn't make sense, because it wasn't like Hermione was allergic to cats — wouldn't that be ironic — but she didn't feel comfortable enough to be a cat around her; mainly, because she sometimes acted like a cat. And that meant she purred. And this was completely mortifying.

But for now Hermione wasn't here and she therefore decided to explore. She jumped from the couch, and trotted around: first the kitchen, smelling around a bit, then the guest bedroom, jumping easily on the bed. Bed that moved.

As a witch, a pureblood one, Minerva had never encountered before a waterbed. It was muggle technology, and up until late, the guest bedroom didn't even have a waterbed. But it was one of Hermione's last eccentricities, and for a cat … it was a wonder.

Sometimes, Minerva's animagus true nature was getting the better of her. Normally, she was conscious enough to fight her first instincts, but the bed moved. And so, she acted like any cat would act: try to see why it moved. And so she jumped on the bed again, attacking the mattress with her paws. Which wave of water caused her to jump once again, hitting the sheets with her tiny paws and really not helping her situation. The bed still moved, and her curious mind was killing her. She was jumping — attacking — and jumping, restless, excited and afraid at the same time.

She was so engrossed into the moving bed she didn't realize Hermione was standing by the door, a hand on her lips, trying to muffle her laughter. But of course, the cuteness, the look of complete awe of the cat's face — her lover's face — got the better of her and she burst in laughter. The noise caught Minerva's attention instantly and she turned her head, before freezing, seeing the girl standing in front of her. Damn.

She fought her primal instincts, and sat on the bed — but Merlin why did it move? —, tried to look tall, dignified, acting as she wasn't, mere seconds ago, jumping like a lunatic. This made Hermione laugh even louder and the young brunette could almost see the frown on the cat's face. A blur later, Minerva was sitting in the tabby's place. And indeed, she was frowning, pursing her lips, and trying to look annoyed and intimidating. Of course, after what Hermione just saw, she just couldn't take her seriously.

"It's a waterbed." Hermione said, and just laughed some more, hysterical by now, barely able to stand. She was leaning against the door, clenching her stomach, and doubling in laughter.

Minerva tried to look stern, again, and tsked, before standing, in all her might. Useless, it was, and the Headmistress realized, because she just rolled her eyes at her lovers antics', a slight blush on her cheeks. Not that she would admit it, but she was indeed slightly embarrassed knowing her … girlfriend had witnessed that.

"Oh, for Merlin's sake, why do I even bother." The Scottish brogue was thick, proof of her embarrassment, and she went to pass Hermione, making her way towards the front door. That stopped the girl instantly — though she had a hard time to stop random giggles to escape her lips — and she ran after her lover, catching her wrist just after she stepped through the door, forcing her back in, and closing her door behind her.

"I'm sorry, Minerva, it's just … Merlin you're adorable!" It made her frown and she pouted, petulant. It really wasn't helping her case, though, she realized.

"I am not adorable." A smile broke on Hermione's face, and she just had this knowing look that annoyed Minerva so much.

"Okay, darling." The pet name made her blush, and she adverted her gaze, biting the inside of her cheek. "Come here." She stepped into the embrace after a couple of seconds and returned it in kind, loving the feeling of being in her arms. "Do you chase butterflies too?"

"Oh, sweet Merlin!" The Headmistress snapped and stood back, staring back at a once more laughing Hermione. She rolled her eyes, and went out the door once again, leaving behind her hysterical lover laughing on the floor of her apartment. She had a smile on her face, though, when she apparated. And she swore she would never, never again, morph around the younger woman. Though, she wondered how it felt to be pet by her. She would have to ask Crookshanks.

Thoughts?

If you have a nice and hilarious idea, a prompt, send me a PM!

'till next time!