Quinn knows that everything is downfall from here. There is no anchor; there is no savior, there isn't anything. She doesn't want to think and doesn't want to hope. She's sure soon, her parents will find out and she will truly have nothing. Yet, having twelve people dressed in the same black and white attire, singing to her, does help to ease the numbness her head has been swimming in.
Since the first day she stepped onto William McKinley High School, Quinn Fabray had a plan. She had meticulously prepared goals and ways to achieve them. She had several layers of walls built up in order to keep herself safe. The first day Quinn Fabray walked into High School, she had an armor.
Needless to say, it's all gone now. She stands in the middle of the stage, and there isn't a single person not belting their hearts out in order to comfort her. But Quinn can only hear one, can only see one. People dance and turn around her, and she follows their moves, but her eyes are trained in just one girl. There's all there is right then.
Her shiny armor firmly in place, pristine, powerful Quinn Fabray walks down the hall. There isn't a single care for the people that surround her, she doesn't see the jocks, she doesn't see the geeks, nor the other cheerleaders that are less than her, and she doesn't see the losers. Quinn Fabray cannot distinguish a single face from the other, they're all a blurry. None of them matter.
Quinn doesn't know at what point it began to be too much. Maybe it was the message, the song or her face; she doesn't know. But the numbness is gone and so are her walls and her mask. The tears start to fall, and the look Rachel gives her, the one that pleads, that almost supplicates, it all that she needs.
It hit her like a train, like a chain ball; like a warm, soft body. They collided in the middle of the hallway and Quinn Fabray wasn't really sure what had hit her, until she looked down. If there was anything that was proved to her that day, it was that it really was possible for the world to stand still. Her eyes connected with brown, wide ones, a single thought running through her mind. Fuck.
Despite their argument, and after all that happened, if there is one thing Quinn is sure, is this. Because in pretending and hiding and replacing, there is thinking. Because trying to deny it so much only led her to think about it more. Quinn knows the number is about to end, and there are only so many tears she can spill without crumbling. She has to make a decision that is proven already made by the look in Rachel's eyes and the tears also running down her cheeks. They're communicating, and she's almost sure they're saying the same.
It took more than Quinn Fabray thought to build that armor again. It remained cracked for a very long time. Even after a year and some, there were still fissures in her mask. Every time she saw her, it would show. Quinn Fabray was sure that, from day one, Rachel Berry knew. It had always felt as if she could see right through her eyes, the looks they gave eachother were never unwitting. Then, every once in a while, Rachel would plead with her eyes silently. Every once in a while, Quinn Fabray felt that something deeper fractured.
Quinn doesn't see the confused looks that everyone casts at Rachel when she breaks the choreography. They're not supposed to end in this position, and as they belt out the end of the song, Quinn and Rachel face eachother. Matching tear strained cheeks and pleading eyes. Quinn lifts a hesitant hand to cup Rachel's cheek and the brunette brings up both, cradling the blonde's face. They're trembling, and everyone's watching, astonished and confused. She raises her other hand to Rachel's face, a small smile playing on her lips. Everything stands still as her eyes connect with wide, brown ones. When she strokes Rachel's cheekbones with her thumbs to wipe her tears, the brunette lowers her gaze, biting her lip. Quinn takes a deep breath and a step forward, their bodies flushed and faces close. Looking up at her through her eyelashes, Rachel nudges their noses and stares deep into her eyes, communicating silently and asking the single question running through both of their minds. The one that will change them finally and forever.
-Are you brave again?