Porn.
Dean Winchester's favourite past time, only thing he has to look forward to after a long monster hunt, and after today it was definitely needed.
After hunting an army of demons right outside of Kansas Dean settled himself down in the dingy motel room he called home for the night with Sam's laptop prepped up on the bed beside him waiting for the site to load up, drink in hand he watched with delight finally feeling settled.
Ahh that's better, he thought to himself.
With Sam away at Bobby's he had time alone which now and then was something he always craved, it was rare but when it happened, he cherished the moment.
Watching as the Double DD'd woman got 'punished' by the pizza man sent a jolt up his groin. He smirked taking a sip of his drink a shot of hunter helper cures anything, he tensed his muscles feeling his cock harden nearly letting a soft moan when a certain someone interrupted his movie.
"Hello Dean", came the familiar voice of Castiel standing at the end of the bed a slight look of amusement on his face as he stared down at Dean.
Dean immediately slammed the laptop lid down and blushed "I wasn't…its not what you-"
Really Dean you're really explaining yourself to him, to an angel of the lord, really? Stupid son of a bitch, he's going to know, god I'm so embarrassed.
"I know what you were doing…so this is what you do when your alone, interesting." he tilted his head to the side intrigued. He never quite understood the fascination with Sex, why humans felt the need to rub up against each other, as an act of pleasure it was all so strange to him.
Dean cleared his throat sitting up zipping back up "I erm…I don't know what to say."
"Don't say anything" He stared lovingly into those deep beautiful emerald eyes Gosh he's beautiful He would never admit it to himself but after saving Dean from the pits of hell Dean was all he ever thought about, it should not be aloud but this bond, this connection they shared made Castiel feel on top of the world.
Dean raised an eyebrow slightly feeling Cas moving closer to him, there it was again invasion of personal space, he gulped nervously looking back up at him "why are you here Cas?"
I came because I missed you, because all I want is to be close to you and be with you every minute of everyday, I love you Dean.
"I was just checking in, I wanted to make sure you were okay."
Dean's smile softened as he said that, it was a great feeling knowing he had his own personal guardian angel looking out for him "well I'm okay, little tired but hey comes with the job description."
"you need to rest I'll wait until morning, we can talk then."
The melody of his wings fluttering filled up the room and Cas was gone.
Dean smiled, letting out a soft sigh, that was definitely the way he needed tonight to end. A visit from his angel.
Chapter 2
The Sun beamed down through the cracks in the curtains causing the older Winchester to wake, he groaned much to his distress, he hated when he never got a decent amount of sleep especially when he had a lot to catch up on.
He forced himself up knowing there was no point fighting it, he wasn't getting back to sleep.
FREEKING SUNLIGHT,WHY DO YOU INSIST OF PREVENTING THIS ONE OTHER BIT OF PLEASURE.
Coffee was next on his agenda, he pulled out a change of clothes from his duffel quickly got changed and headed out to the nearest diner he could find.
Getting into the impala his phone vibrated in his pocket, pulling it out swiftly he answered "Hey Sammy, what's up?"
"Sorry did I wake you, I know this isn't usually the right time for your wake up call."
"it's fine, what's wrong?"
Sam sat up against Bobby's dining table, not that it was ever really used as a dining table "oh nothing, just telling you that I think I'll be sticking round here for a bit longer, Bobby's found some leads for where the demons are going next, so get your ass back here when you can Kay?"
Dean held one hand on the wheel as he reversed out the motel car park "what lead's?" he asked him a hint of irritation in his voice, its bad isn't it, you're going to tell me the worlds going to hell again aren't you?
Sam hesitated, this really wasn't something to discuss over the phone "just get over here okay, and make it quick.", with that he hung up not letting Dean get another word in.
Dean gritted his teeth throwing his phone down on the seat beside him "dammit-"he cursed under his breath. He knew it, he knew once things got good again that there would be something else that made everything come crashing down, because something always does.
He had only been away an hour at the most and already he felt like the world was going to end, great freeking fantastic.
Reaching a diner he quickly ordered coffee and the special to go, he wasn't waiting around.
He got back in the car and drove back to the motel where he found Cas waiting on him. He couldn't help but grin at the way he presented himself, so awkward and coy.
"Boy am I glad to see you" he said as he pulled himself out of the car, breakfast in hand, slamming the door shut.
Castiel send him a warm smile standing upright the way a soldier would "I'm glad, I told you I'd be back.", he followed Dean inside "you need to eat up, I have a surprise for you."
Dean turned placing the paper bag with his breakfast in it on the table, enticed "a surprise, should I be worried?"
"No, infact I think you will very much enjoy this, now eat."
Dean raised an eyebrow a little not exactly liking how mysterious he was, surprises never usually ended well for Dean, but then this was Cas, couldn't be that bad could it?
He munched on his bacon burger glancing up at Cas as he suddenly gave him the silent treatment
"oookay, are you not going to give me any hints at all?"
Castiel looked down on Dean and frowned "no I'm not, you'll find out soon enough."
He loved his this was driving Dean crazy, he could see it in eyes and to be honest you could read it in his face, he was excited and nervous, this is just what he wanted.
Moments later Dean managed to wolf down his food "whenever your ready happy meal I'm all yours" he smiled wanting to completely forget about the conversation him and Sam had earlier.
Cas had his serious face on raising his hand to Deans forehead transporting them to a small room a lot nicer than the motel.
It was dimly lit with scented candles with nothing but a wrought iron double bed with dark crimson silk sheets covering it, beside the bed was an unopened box full of god knows what, and a stereo .
.
Dean looked around the room confused feeling a little light headed after that trip
"Where the hell are we, it stinks like sex in here?" he frowned looking to Cas for an explanation.
Cas smiled up at him placing a hand on his shoulder "well it should, this is your fantasy Dean" he gave a simple nod.
This is your fantasy.
Chapter 3
Dean widened his eyes suddenly looking back around the room it all becoming very familiar to him, he smirked and the frowned looking to Cas in disguist "you've been inside my head?"
Castiel put his head to the side not seeing a problem "and-"
"AND…and, invasion of privacy Cas, I mean something's aren't meant to be shared-"he frowned again looking around the room "I mean I love what you've done with the place, but this, this is too much." he stuttered .
Castiel smiled sweetly walking over to him, pressing a hand against Deans cheek" don't be afraid Dean, I thought you'd be happy about this, this is what you want right?"
Dean put his head down to the floor closing his eyes feeling a little ashamed "it is…but I can't, this is just a dream." He pulled himself away from Castiels touch already feeling a tingling sensation down below.
What the hell was happening, he shouldn't be feeling this, make it stop, just make it stop.
Castiel made his way over to the box and opened it a small smile on his face "I could make it real for you, give you what you need, like you said I've been inside your head I know what you need, what you want, just let me give it to you." he was practically begging him.
Dean had his back turned to Castiel feeling Cas's words wash over him the light headedness getting worse now, he turned to face the angel in the trench coat giving him an inviting smile.
"I trust you." he nodded
Castiel smiled back at him "okay good, take off your clothes, all of them and then lie on the bed" he said in a dominant tone. He had to make sure to act this all out to Dean's needs, he wanted to make him the happiest he's ever felt. He grabbed what he needed from the box and turned to Dean who was already doing as he was told.
Cas reached over grabbing hold of his wrists and roughly pulled his arms up cuffing them to the bed's headboard "hmm that's more like it" he stroked his face gently, teasing him.
He grabbed a black leather blindfold and positioned it over Deans eyes tying it securely.
Dean winced slightly pulling against his restraints. Fuck this felt great. He knew the fun hadn't even began yet but Jesus he already felt aroused.
He forced him up positioning him the way he wanted, pulling his head back by his hair " I'm going to eat you alive bitch."
Dean smirked letting out a chuckle" damn..Cas never knew you were a kinky son of a bitch" he grinned .
Truth of the matter was Dean was terrified, he had never done anything like this well not with another man anyways, I mean there was one time back when he was 20 where he briefly hooked up this Goth chick who was all into the bondage thing, this was just like taking a trip down memory lane.
Castiel glared as he spoke "be quiet… you will speak when I tell you too." he finished off restraining him moving onto his legs now he spread them wide attaching a spreader bar to his ankles and grinned. This was going to be fun.
Fuck. Dean thought…I cant move I cant fucking move, he had no idea where Cas was or what he was doing and you know what that kind of excited him.
It went silent for a moment.
"C-Cas?" he stuttered feeling his insides churning inside him as his nerves got to him.
Castiel watched him and smiled now also stripping to his vessels boxers, wow even Jimmy was up for this.
He moved himself towards Dean's naked body sliding a hand along Dean's now hard cock rubbing it gently .
Dean jolted up as Cas appeared from nowhere letting out a small whimper "oh god-"
Dean had his eyes closed, not that it mattered anyways cause he was in the dark anyways " Cas, holy mother of… yes…please…more…that feels incredible." he didn't care that he was talking against Castiels will, it felt so fucking good.
Castiel looked up as he spoke slapping him hard across the face "what did I tell you, do not make me use the gag." he glared.
Dean grunted his cheek stung now. Cas was taking this whole dominant thing way to seriously, not that he minded.
He clenched his fists together tugging on the restraints feeling Cas sucking him off now. He clamped his lips together trying so desperately not to make a sound.
This was incredibly simply incredibly, he felt his whole body burning up as Cas picked up the pace.
Cas forced his mouth so far into it that it almost hit the back his throat, he gagged slipping his mouth out spreading his saliva and cum all along Deans torso.
Dean shuddered his cock trembling now, he wasn't sure he wanted this anymore…but he was helpless ,powerless and that now excitement turned to fear. He felt sick and dizzy, this surely wasn't a good thing.
DON'T BE A PUSSY DEAN,BITE BULLET AND JUST ACCEPT THIS GIFT THAT CAS IS GIVING YOU,YOU'RE ENJOYING IT FOR FUCK SAKE.
Terrified to say another word he put his head to the side and gritted his teeth Castiel sucking him off once more " Cas…wait….I don't feel so good-"he said truthfully wanting to throw up
Cas on the other hand wasn't having any of it, he glared back at him once more as he disobeyed him for the second time removed himself from Deans moist dick and pulled himself up, he got the ball gag from the box and tied it round his mouth then grabbed him by his hair pulling his head back roughly "I warned you, I didn't want to do this but you've left me no choice" once gagged he took hold of his wrists unclipping the cuffs from the bed only to turn him round forcefully so his ass was in the air, Dean grunted hearing the clicking sound of the restraints now bound to the headboard once more.
Fuck Cas was actually good at this.
"I'm going to fuck you hard." he removes his own dick from his boxers and lathers it up with lube, sliding into Dean's hole with ease. Holding onto his waist for support he thrusts inside him hard and rough keeping at a slow pace for now but only to punish Dean more, he hears Dean whimpering and it feels so good. He grunts as he now picks up the pace.
Dean bit hard on the rubber ball in his mouth drool sliding out his mouth as Castiel fucks him, his muscles tensed and he cries out feeling like he's close to a release but its not enough, it hurts, it hurts so bad and yet he cant hit the spot. Not yet. Why cant this end, he needs this release.
Castiel grunts in the back of his throat enjoying this way too much, the power he had over this Winchester felt amazing, moving at a extremely punishing pace he thrusts into him as deep as he could, abusing the poor mans ass. He refuses to stop, being an angel he never felt that urge that release that you would get once you finally hit that peak.
Dean lets out a heavy sob unable to take this anymore, he tugged on the restraints trying to attract the angels attention, screaming out now as he finally hits his climax, he was all fucked out he couldn't move a muscles, everything inside him just fell limp.
Cas slipped out of Dean finally and grinned gently stroking his cock leaking cum, he lathered his fingers with it and smeared over Deans cheek "good boy, you played your part well." he removed the blindfold, his eyes streaming with tears, wiping them away and Cas smiled.
Dean stared space feeling sore all over but boy did that feel incredible, never in his life has he felt anything like that before, it was exactly what he needed. He looked up towards the headboard expecting Cas to release him any moment but instead Castiel got up off the bed and paced around the room as if deciding his next move.
Dean whimpered now, tugging on the restraints once more letting out a muffled "get me the hell out of here".
Castiel turned as Dean tried to speak and shook his head" Oh Dean, have you forgotten?" he smirked standing at the end of the bed "It's not over yet…"
Chapter 4
Castiel raised his arm once more slapping him hard against Deans face causing his nose to bleed, he glared and smirked "like to punished Dean?"
Dean stared up at the lusted up angels sapphire eyes trying to smile, but the gag prevented any type of movement, his stomach muscles spasming inside him, this felt so intense he couldn't quite figure out now weather he wanted this to be over or for this to continue, his mind playing tricks on him.
He tried to speak clenching his fists together, not taking his eyes off him
"Why Dean, why do you want this, you want the pain not the pleasure, I don't understand?"
It was very confusing to him, he had seen inside Dean's soul that day , the day when he gripped him tight and raised him from perdition. Dean somewhere along the lines got broken, hell had definitely changed him and not for the better. I mean okay he was like this way before he was cast off into the pits, finding out his brother was a psychic freak, losing his father, the apocalypse.. yeah Dean was defiantly cursed. But why torture himself like this everyday, surely he was not blame for everything that had happened?
He wasn't.
"You want this right, you want me to hurt you?" He took out of the box a knife rubbing his fingertips along the end of the blade staring into Dean's eyes once more.
Dean's eye filled up with tears and simply nodded, it wasn't like he could communicate any other way, using his eyes as a way of communication JUST DO IT he screamed out inside his mind PLEASE CASTIEL JUST DO IT.
Cas really didn't want to do this, he wanted to see him happy, not hurt but what Dean wanted he got, he had a duty towards him, taking the knife towards his cheek he carved a small indentation watching as a little trickle of blood ran down, he moaned leaning in and used his tongue licking it up tasting the iron in his mouth. He moaned slightly the blood tingling the back of his tongue, it was like heroin, sending him into some sort of mad frenzy.
Dean shuddered closing his eyes tightly his other cheek pressed up against the mattress arching his back trying to speak.
"What is Dean, what do you want me to do?" he put his head to the side a look of sadness in his eyes now, which slowly turned to that same lustful look as Dean gave him his orders.
Castiel smirked pulling himself away from Dean for a moment "as you wish" he moved round the back of him once more grabbing hold of Deans behind spreading it out not even bothering to lube up this time. He slipped into Dean once more penetrating it, grinding and slamming into him just like Dean wanted.
He leaned over still working into his ass not holding back this time, feeling beads of sweat dripping down his forehead. Grabbing hold of his hair once more he pulled his head back Dean probably wasn't going to survive this one not at the rate he was going…fuck.
"I understand you now, you fuck all these whores for a means of making you feel alive, the porn and the drinking, you think it will make all the pain disappear."
Dean whimpered closing his eyes as the tears kept streaming down his face, not because he was sad but because Castiel understood, he knew how to make it all right for Dean, sure he was a little twisted and broken inside but no one really understood what he wanted, how to connect with him, except for Cas.
Castiel thrusted hard pushing in and out in and out until he heard Dean scream under the gag, he smirked.
"that's not it all though is it? You might enjoy fucking the brains out of all these women, but deep down that's not really true, your tired of feeling lonely, deep down you want to die, this is your fantasy -" He slid his free hand down cupping Deans balls in his hand squeezing them gently.
Dean trembled at Castiels touch hearing his words, yes I want to die…yes you bastard you brought me back from hell when all I wanted was to stay and take the pain, I deserve it…why Cas why did you deprive me of my resting place?
The restraints dug so deep into his wrists now as he struggled to keep himself comfortable, Castiel abusing ever part of him, and it felt so fucking good. How was he still able to feel anything, Damn he was good he would defiantly feel the pain in the morning.
Castiel pushed harder and faster into the hunter grabbing him by his neck, choking him but just enough so that it didn't harm him.
Deans eyes widened gagging on the ball gag finding it difficult to breath from everything that was happening to him, he just couldn't keep up ,his whole body tensed up slamming his eyes shut once more not even fighting it anymore, he just let Cas get on with it.
If felt like an hour, but it probably wasn't and Castiel was finally done, he slipped back out a satisfied look on his face as he stared back at his 'victim', he immediately removed the spreader bar from his ankles, next came the gag, unhooking it and threw it down to the floor. He rubbed his thumb along his spit covered lips wiping it away as Dean lay practically unconscious, Damn he had really run Dean down into the ground, quite literally.
"I'm sorry Dean, but its what you wanted, you know I had to right?"
Dean lay there still bound by the cuffs and slowly looked up at Cas a small smile on his "you bastard-"he smirked unable to keep himself awake any longer and passed out.
Chapter 5
Hours had passed, Dean had received about 5 missed calls, all from his brother. Cas had removed the cuffs from his wrists right after he had passed out. Watching him as he slept he smiled as he lay there peacefully.
"I'm sorry Dean" he repeated like before "I wish I didn't have to do that to you." he ran his fingers through his hair.
All these feelings he was having for this human, it wasn't right, he was an angel, it was a sin and after what he had just done to this man, he knew he would be cast out from heaven.
He continued to stare at him and smiled lovingly stroking his cheek now where he had cut him
"I…I feel regret for what I've done to you…I never wanted this, I feel sorry for you Dean, for the weight you have on your shoulders, looking after Sam, dealing with the pit-"he sighed heavily looking down taking his hand now "but I'm going to help you through it.
Deans phone rang again, causing Cas to jump. He frowned a little worried now that Dean wasn't waking up, it had been a few hours now he should be awake.
"Dean?" he called out to him staring down at him, Dean not moving a muscle.
He placed a hand of Dean's bare chest "wake up Dean"
Dean finally gasped for breath sitting up in a fright looking up to Cas who had this guilt ridden look on his face. He fell back down his head hitting the pillow needing a moment a process everything that had happened.
He wasn't exactly sure if it actually happened or not. Until he went to sit up finding himself stiff, his whole body sore.
"Cas…I have one thing to say to you-" he glanced up at him, licking his cracked lips "don't ever do that again."
Cas stared back at him confused he swallowed hard looking down at the floor upset "I thought…this is what you wanted, you told me, you said you trusted me?"
Dean glanced up ever so slightly at his angel, looking hurt "well I guess I changed my mind-" He pulled himself up the best he could and sighed turning away from Cas, he could hardly look at him now " how could you Cas..huh you had no right invading my mind like that."
"I'm trying to help you Dean, you may not understand now, but I care about you, these were your desires,I wanted to give you something, let you know that I know what your feeli-"
Dean interrupted clearly pissed off now "HEY..you don't know jack swat about me, just because your all hooked up on your angel juice doesn't mean you know me."
Castiel looked up at him fixing his trench coat and nodded "was my mistake, what can I do to make it up to you?"
Dean pulled himself up off the bed and stumbled still feeling exhausted falling against the side table in the room gripping his fingers round the corner of it for support "just leave me alone for a while, I can't even look at you right now."
Cas stared back at him tears in his eyes as he said that and disappeared out of the room.
Dean turned back sadly, gritting his teeth trying to hold back all the emotions that he felt.
DAMMIT CAS, WHY DID YOU HAVE TO DO THAT? TELL ME WHAT I ALREADY KNOW.
He made his way over towards the liqueur cabinet, this was his fantasy room after all and poured himself a drink, his hand trembling as he put the glass to his lips, he took a deep breath he forced the drink in his mouth swallowing hard feeling the bitter taste of the liqueur burn the back of his throat, with that he poured himself another, and another, you get the drill.
He must of blacked out cause he woke with his phone buzzing beside him, also now fully clothed how did that happen?, he groaned reaching out for it, seeing double now flipping it open answering it "sorry Dean can't come to phone right now." he widened his eyes trying to keep them open.
"Dean?" Sam frowned on the other line, he sounded weird, this couldn't be good "Where the hell are you, you were supposed to be here hours ago?"
Dean forced a smile and laughed hysterically "oh I was…wasn't I, sorry got a little tied up." he groaned trying to move and frowned trying to focus on anything but the whole room was spinning "is this real?" he muttered to himself.
Sam frowned glancing up at Bobby who was in the room with him mouthing to him "I think he's drunk". He gulped "erm what…Dean where are you?"
Dean closed his eyes, having not felt this drunk for a very long time "doesn't matter, whatever it is we can't stop it, I won't be able to save the world this time." he took another drink "and I'm fooling myself if I believe otherwise, it's over-"
Sam widened his eyes, he certainly wasn't expecting that "Woaw Dean, no don't you ever think that, seriously dude what's going on, where are you, I'm coming to get you."
Dean ignored his question randomly and drunkenly belted out the lyrics to eye of the tiger.
Sam pulled his eyes phone away from his ear "DEAN…focus ,where are you ?"he repeated running a hand through his hair honestly worried, he hadn't heard his brother like this since their father died.
Sam got cut off "Dammit" he cursed knowing he had to look for him, not having a clue where to begin "I gotta go." he told Bobby almost tripping up on his own feet as he got up too quickly. "I'll let you know what happens." he rushed out .
Chapter 6
Hours had pasted, the sun was about to go down and Dean was still stuck in his fantasy world calmly singing away to himself as he poured the last of the bottle ignoring his phone the past hour, raising his glass he then downed it in one "cheers".
Usually in situations like these when things were getting to him, it was easy for Dean to just push it aside in his mind, forget about it until it all becomes too much but this, Cas making him realise how messed up he really was… and it hurt.
Dean groaned sitting up at the edge of the bed now the alcohol in his system taking over " I'm sorry" he rubbed his eyes trying to stop himself from breaking down but at this current moment it seemed impossible.
"Cas…I'm sorry, please I need you, you're the only one who gets it." he begged with tears in his eyes, hating to really admit it to himself but it was true, he was alone so very alone and he had been for a very long time.
"Please?" he begged once more.
Cas eventually made an appearance standing behind a look of sadness on his face "I'm right here Dean." he said in a calm, soothing voice.
Dean turned standing up to face Castiel how the hell was he standing up in his condition he had no idea.
"I owe you an apology" he looked down ashamed of himself, guilt filling up inside him "you were right, about everything." he reached over hesitantly taking his hand in his, needing to sit down again
He wasn't gay by any means…he wasn't, he knew he wasn't but there was definitely a connection between them.
Dean stared up into his eyes rubbing his fingers along the angels knuckles " I need you to… you know-" he could say he wanted sex from him again, cause damn he was still in pain from the first round but atleast if they tried it again it might make him feel better "fuck me Cas, like before, I need it." Or perhaps this was just the alcohol talking.
"Not yet, not until you've…erm I think this is the word but sobered up." replied Cas, knowing it would do the Winchester no good getting what he wanted just yet. "I'm taking you to Bobby's" he nodded.
Dean resists, pulling his hand away from him "no…no…no-no" he pleads, panting for breath "please, I don't want to see them, can't I just stay here with you."
Castiel hated this, he felt like he had to make a choice but knew this was for Deans own good.
Dean frowned "Come on Cas, don't be a dick."
Castiel put a finger onto Deans forehead sending him unconscious, the hunter falling limp in his arms, staring down at the beauty in his arms he smiled weakly stroking the mans hair.
A familiar shift in the air erupted the living room of the Singer household making the Younger Winchester jump out of his skin. He hadn't been able to find him earlier so thought best to let Dean come to him, he knew it would happen sooner or later.
Startled he pulled himself up immediately "Dean?" he hurries over to him in shock "what in gods name happened to him?" noticing the cuts and bruises along Deans face,
Cas meant business, he would explain to Sam in time, or not who knows but right now his main focus was getting Dean to safety "help me get him to the panic room." he instructed.
Reaching the panic room they lay him down on the cot cuffing one of his wrists to the metal "this is for your own good Dean." he glanced up at Sam now who looked furious.
"I'm so sorry Sam…this was my doing."
Sam crossed his arms leaning up against the cold hard metal wall and frowned staring right down at his brother, shifting his eyes towards the angel now perplexed. "What do you mean?"
Cas glanced up feeling guilty, Dammit he thought he was going to figure it out, Sam was smart that way "I said some things, he took it pretty hard I guess."
"You guess? He looks like he's been hit by a car" Sam sighed heavily, he didn't have time for this, he already had an apocalypse hanging over their shoulder.
Castiel stared over at an unconscious Dean, gosh he was beautiful when he slept, he gulped rubbing his lips together nervously turning away so not to attract attention to himself "I err…I just thought he should be here with his family."
Sam frowned finding all of this a bit suspious, especially since Cas was acting all weird "okay well thank you." he heard the flutter of wings echo around the panic room. Again Cas leaving so abruptly caught his suspicions
Sam was now alone with a comatose Dean, figuring out how to fix this.
Chapter 7
Dean could feel himself coming too, unaware of drunken conversation he and Cas had shared earlier, eyes fuzzy as he opened his eyes and frowned as he tried to regain focus seeing a blurred figure of someone sat opposite him, he knew that figure anywhere.
"Great" he groaned slowly pulling himself up finding some cuffs attached to the bed, not realising they were for him at first and closed his eyes, putting his head in his hands the room spinning feeling like he had been hit by a ton of bricks.
"Morning sunshine, sleep well?" Sam slammed his book shut staring at his brother not amused.
Dean licked his lips already guessing Sam was pissed "I know what your going to say-"
Sam folded his arms a stern and slightly pissed look on his face "oh really?" he said forcefully sitting in the same position not moving, he needed that small distance between him and his brother otherwise he might hit for being so stupid.
Dean rubbed his forehead, this was always the worst part, the hangover "look I'm sorry Sammy if I worried you okay…but I'm fine." clearly that was a lie.
Sam didn't take his eyes off him reading him like book "you're not fine Dean, I'm not an idiot, you only get in this state when something's really wrong so talk"
Dean shook his head perked at the edge of the cot shifting away a slight hesitation in his voice "Sam-"
Sam rolled his eyes, here we go again bottling it all up like he always does, he pulled himself up throwing him a bottle of water and pills "take these they'll help with the hangover." he knew Dean wasn't going to talk, whatever was bothering him he wouldn't tell him, he never does. Shaking his head in a mood he stormed out the panic room locking it behind him, he wasn't letting him go that easily.
Dean shuddered looking up and around him slowly pulling himself up off the bed and wandered around feeling a sickly feeling at the pit of his stomach, groaning he stopped, trying to stop himself from throwing up.
He sat back down and let out a little whimper, all he wanted was his angel to come in and make everything okay again, he popped a couple of pills downing them with water and sobbed, slamming his fist down on the cold hard metal of the bed he forced himself to toughen up God damn you Castiel, you've turned me into a pussy.
Castiel had appeared hours later after being summoned by Sam, having explained everything to him, well except the sex part, okay so maybe not everything, lingering at the bottom of the stairs that lead to the panic room, he heard Dean having one of his moments.
He braced himself, taking a deep long heavy breath and approached the door and unlocked it and walked through it.
Dean glared up as he saw Castiel having trashed the whole panic room in a fit of rage, storming over to him he grabbed hold of his shirt and slammed him against the wall" what the fuck have you done to me Cas… why are you screaming in my head? I can't stop it, you're all I think about"
Cas grunted as he was thrown to the wall looking into the hunters eyes and pulled a little smile, not fighting back " I guess my plan worked, abusing you like this, it makes me feel better."
Dean glared the vein at the top of his head bulging out now furious "WHAT…what the hell is wrong with you, stop messing with my head, this is killing me Cas." he pleaded.
Cas continued to look into the mans eyes and smiled "I'm sorry I thought this is what you wanted?" referring back to his 'fantasy'.
He had it all under control.. Dean was like a puppet to him. "I know how your mind works now, your coping mechanism" he shrugged "you wanted the pain, you wanted to suffer, so I gave you exactly what you wanted to make you realise, your worth a lot more than you think, you're special, you're a survivor…a hero. There's so much darkness in you Dean, I just wish you would see the light." he was desperate to get through to him now.
Dean gulped staring up at the angel his lips quivering with fear as he spoke those words to him, loosening his grip slightly "Damn you Castiel" he voice breaking now staring down at his feet needing a moment to compose himself, he never considered himself a hero, but hearing Castiel, an angel of the lord saying those words to him he believed it just for a moment.
Without any hesitation he grabbed him roughly once more pulling him into a kiss, their tongues colliding together, moving rhythmically like a dance, he moaned against his mouth, not even giving a shit how wrong this was.
Dean purred running his fingers through the brunettes hair "Fuck me Cas, just like before" he smirked, this time it was different, this time he knew he wanted it.
Cas stood there, feeling like he was in paradise, he loved it,
Between two points, the line that had been drawn between them was finally bringing them closer.
The end.