my deepest feelings...
... feelings I don't tell, I tell it to nobody, I hardly ever talk out them. They are there
most people think I'm a determined and mostly friendly and happy girl. Maybe I am the first
two but the last one I can't be always. I try to hide my deepest feelings by making fun,
laughing and other happy stuff. But somewhere in my heart there's sadness, misery and other
non-happy stuff. Which gets bigger every time somebody says something really mean or rude.
I try not to show It, I stay happy. and then, what comes? A day I don't wanna be happy. Everybody thinks it's weird cuz normally I'm happy and cheerful. Then those days,
I just feel pain and I feel I wanna cry. crying just for nothing. But I can't. Friends are
asking then:
"What's wrong?"
I can't answer properly, I say: "nothing Is wrong, I'm fine", which I'm actually not. I dunno
what's wrong myself. I just feel like being non-happy.
They care about me, but then I feel that nobody can help how hard they try. I just want to
be left alone for some time, but yet I need somebody...
Chapter oneMy name Is Bloom. I'm a fairy and owner of the dragon fire. I have long fire red hair, and
heavenly blue eyes. I'm a member of a girls gang at the school Alfea, school for fairies.
There's, Stella, Flora, Musa, Tecna and Layla.
I have a bunny, Kiko and a boyfriend, his name Is Sky, more about him later. I'm adopted by a nice couple from earth In a little village, Gardenia. Thanks to my older sister, Daphne, I'm still alive. Now I'm searching for a way to find my real parents back, which hasn't succeeded yet. Originally I come from Domino
Well, let's talk more about my boyfriend, erm... He's nice, has cute blue eyes and long
blonde hair. When I'm close to him, I try to forget my problems. He's prince of Eraklyon
And of course I have my Winx friends. Stella is my best friend and the first fairy I met.
She's a shopping freak, likes boys and also has a boyfriend, his name Is Brandon. He has
dark brown eyes and hair. Together they look very sweet. She's from Solaria.
Then you have Flora, shy, friendly, a true and loyal friend. She also has a boyfriend, his
name is Helia. He has long black hair (even longer then sky's) and really intend eyes.
He can be very confusing and mystic... maybe that's what flora likes about him. She is
from Linphea.
Musa, is well, kind of big-mouthed, Inconstant and Indifferent. Yet she has a emotional side.
She's together with Riven, even though they haven't really told each other that they like each
other. But we all know. Her home planet Is Melody.
Our Tecna is the smartest of the group. She's very logical and knows everything about
technologic things. She also doesn't talk a lot about her feelings. That's why Timmy
fits so good with her. He's kind of like her. Tecna Is from Zenith.
The last one Is Layla. She's very sportive and loves to dance. she acts mostly strong but
Inside she's scared, not that something's wrong with it. Everybody can be scared of things.
even me, I'm afraid of lotsa things. Andros is her planet. She's together with Nabu.
Now, I'll tell you how It began...
"I want you to leave me alone!" I yelled to sky. I threw a pillow to his head.
"What's so suddenly wrong with you?" he asked.
"Nothing!" I yelled once again, "Just leave!"
"Ok, ok." he mumbled and left.
After he was gone, I busted out of tears, nobody was around and if it would be, I wouldn't
care about it. All the girls left for a day. I said I would come, after I finished my work.
Suddenly he stood there. Sky. Some days earlier I tried to avoid him. I didn't want to talk.
I think he knew what I was trying to do, so he took his chance. He came in and tried to
talk with me. I told him I didn't want to talk. He thought he had something to do with it.
I told him that it's not true. But he came closer, hugged me and asked: "Are you sure?"
I blushed but told him again that he has nothing to do with it. Then he asked me If I had someone else. "No!" I shrieked then. I couldn't believe he thought about such things. I love him, I still do, but like I said before, I have my days...
He didn't believe me. He asked again. Then I yelled...
For hours I laid on my bed. Thinking of what's wrong. Thinking about a part of the puzzle
to make me complete that's missing. Everywhere In my room laid handkerchiefs spread around. My face was wet of crying. I heard a sound of a door opening. Quickly I jumped from my bed. I collected the handkerchiefs and threw them quickly away in the waste bin. I whipped some last teardrops of my face and tried to smile, even though it was all fake.
The girls came in. "Where were you? We were waiting for you!" shouted Stella Irritated.
"Sorry" I tried to apologise myself. I totally forgot about it. "I'm just done with my
work." I lied. I couldn't tell them the truth. "They won't understand me." I thought.
The others left, accept Flora, cuz I share my room with her. We kept looking at each other
for some time until she said two simply words: "You cried."
"No I didn't." I lied again.
"Your eyes are red."
"Oh, that's nothing, just from an allergy." I replied. Lying again. Flora didn't ask anything
else. I was glad that she believed it. Maybe she didn't but I didn't care.
Later, bedtime. I couldn't sleep. I was still thinking about my feelings and I was sorry
that I yelled at sky. I felt sick. Sick Inside. Weird feelings in my stomach. I looked at
Flora. She was asleep and wasn't about to wake up.
I got out of my bed and went to my desk. I simply took a sheet of paper and a pen.
I wrote on the letter: "Dear Sky."
I thought: "Is this a good Idea?" I wrote some other things. It took me the whole night. It wasn't much but that didn't matter. When the light of clear sun came up, I was ready. I putted it in an envelope and hid it under some books. I felt a lot better. I dressed up and wanted to get my stuff for school today, but by accident, all kinds of stuff fell over. Flora got awake. "Sorry!" I said.
"It's ok." she replied. She looked at her watch. "I was about to get up soon anyway."
I smiled weak. A little bit of my sadness remained, but not enough to be down. That day
I was back my own happy me. I laughed and made fun with my friends. We had a great time
like everyday. I forgot about my problems and all the rest. Then In the late afternoon, a
girl came running to me. "Sky Is here," she said, "He asked for you."
I was shocked and replied to her that I would be there in a minute. I ran to my room and
took out the letter I wrote last night. I looked at it and then out of my window.
I saw Sky waiting on his windrider. He had his helmet in his hands. I ran downstairs and almost bumped into somebody.
When I was out of the building I started walking again. I was kinda
out of breath but I didn't show It. I came closer and he saw me. "Bloom..." he started.
I laid my finger on his mouth and gave him the letter, turned around and left. Confused
he looked after me with his blue eyes. When I got back Inside In the building I sighted and
ran to my room. I looked outside...
-sky pov-
"Why did she just do that?" I thought. I opened the letter and started to read. there stood:
"Dear sky,
I'm sorry about yesterday. I was kind of In a bad mood. I dunno why I was so angry suddenly.
I feel strange the last time. It's like nobody can help me. I think I need to solve this
myself. I hope you can forgive me. It's not your fault of somebody else...
goodbye."
After I read It, I stared in front of me, put my helmet on again and left. The whole
trip to red fountain I had to think of what she wrote. She says It's all her fault...
-Bloom pov-
I was glad that that was over. Days passed by and I didn't hear a single thing of Sky.
My sad feelings grew. The girls saw that I wasn't my happy self anymore.
Stella couldn't see me suffering anymore and she asked: "What's wrong? You know you can
always count on me..."
I didn't want to reply so I did like I didn't hear her. With her sunny brown eyes she looked
worried at me. "Is this about Sky?" she asked.
Water got Into my eyes and I said: "No."
I left. I walked, looking down. I didn't want to see a thing. I felt miserable, alone...
My feet brought me to my favourite place. A place that nobody knows and where I can be alone. I started to cry and I hid my face in my hands. After a good time crying I got up and anger was bursting out of me. I hit with my fist a wall. Tears were flowing from my eyes.
Sometime later I got back In my room. I stared at the ceiling. Doing nothing. all my
friends were very worried. Every time they asked me what was wrong, I ignored them or I
replied that nothing's wrong. Why do they always wonder what's wrong? I couldn't help it myself. This weird feeling hurt so much. I didn't know where it came from and how to get rid of it. Even my magic wasn't what it was. I thought I should just forget everything. That everything would be fine afterwards... but it wouldn't...