Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's Anatomy. Seriously. Wish I did, but I don't. I'm not that cool.
Rating: PG... maybe a little more... I don't know, I'm not great with ratings.
Summary: Burke is no longer Burke with a bad hand, and both Cristina and he know it. Can Cristina step up and fight for her man, or will she leave him for once and for all? One-Shot...
Author's Note: It's almost completely AU, just so you know. Oh and it takes place a week after What I Am.
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Cristina had gone over it in her mind for the past two days. She needed to make it perfect. She needed to make it work. Having been caught off guard by what he had said, she needed to find if she really wanted Preston Burke, or if she could suffice with the once great Preston Burke. She wasn't sure when he asked. She wasn't sure that whole night as she lay tucked under his strong arms. She wasn't even sure when he had kissed her lips, asking without words.However, she was sure now.
Cristina looked at Burke, and reached her hands out to him. He cocked a single eyebrow, and opened his mouth to say something, but she hushed him. She needed to get this off her chest. It was like weight that had held her down for over 48 hours, and she needed to be free of it. And yet, more than that she needed him to know the truth. Even if it was hard for her to say.
"You may be Preston Xavier Burke, a widely renowned cardiothoracic surgeon." She started, looking at his hands. She then lifted her head, needing to see him.
"No, you are. However, you are also stubborn as hell, and macho, and controlling, and you snore, and you never put the toilet seat down, and you withhold surgery when I'm a bad girlfriend!" She took a deep breath in, and noticed his look of shock and hurt, but she needed to keep going.
"But…" Her voice was almost a whisper, before she raised her volume, "You also have the best smile when I catch you looking at me, and the way your nostrils flair when you try to lie, and the way you hold me when you think I'm sleeping, and your laugh, and your ability to make the best chicken I have ever had in my life…" She exclaimed, releasing his hand. She held a hand to her temple before continuing, knowing that the hardest part was coming.
"When we first… I mean… I never thought we would end up living together. I held my guard around you. I don't let very many people in. My dad…" She started, before a small sob escaped from her lips. Gentle tears fell from her eyes and slid down her cheeks. Burke reached out for her and wiped them slowly with his fingers, mumbling sweet things in her ears.
"My real dad… he died when I was just little. He was a cardiothoracic surgeon too… and then he died. No-no one knows this… I have never told anyone. I-I-I keep myself guarded, but somehow… somehow you got in." Her lips trembled, yet she wasn't yet done.
"And that's why I love you, Preston." She sighed, her whole chest falling in triumph. She had been more honest with him then she ever had in her life. He now knew the truth. She loved him, but she couldn't loose him. She lost her father, they had a Shiva. She couldn't do that with Burke – Preston. She could never loose him, it would break her.
A silence hung in the air. The only sounds auditable were the two hearts beating simultaneously. She waited. With every bone in her body she waited for him to say anything to break the silence.
"You called me Preston." He mumbled finally.
"That's all you got out of that. I spilt my heart out, and you question me about-" She asked, frown lines appearing across her forehead.
"You're right… I'm sorry. Uh, why did you call me Preston?" He asked timidly, trying to ask her without being yelled at.
"It's your name, isn't it?" She snapped, growing tired of him and his stupid questions. If she had a dog named Rover, was she expected to call him dog?
"Well yes…" He started, before being interrupted.
"Am I not allowed to call you by your first name?"
Cristina was not used to spilling her soul to anyone, and afterwards she hadn't expected him to ask such simple questions. Wasn't he supposed to admit something as well? She didn't know what she was doing. Perhaps it was all a mistake. Maybe she shouldn't have said anything in the first place.
"No, I mean yes… But why?" He persisted.
"Because." She said stubbornly, before melting at his touch. His left hand on her cheek, made her smile in spite of it all. Once his hand left her flesh, she found a new courage inside of her. She could answer him. She needed to tell him what she had been thinking for the past week.
"I admire and look up to Burke the doctor, but – I love you, Preston the man… I always have."
"Oh." He said after a brief silence.
"Oh? Oh? All you are going to say is 'oh'?" She exclaimed, her voice raising after each word.
"Shut up and kiss me." He replied, his lips near hers.
"Oh ok." She managed to string together as he cupped her face between his hands. His lips met hers and she fell into him. She loved him with all of her heart, and he loved her. In spite of her hiding from it as long as she could, she had actually found love. Her lips tingled, then her arms wrapped around his neck.
That night she learnt what it meant to 'make love'. She learnt what it meant seventeen times.
