Category: Card Captor Sakura; Sakura x Syaoran (what else?)
Author: Lucy the wandering, lone assassin (AKA Fishie)
Rating: PG-13+ (as of yet)
Disclaimer: The show Card Captor Sakura and all the characters belongs to CLAMP, not me. This story is being written for recreational purposes only, and no profit is being made.
Spoilers: This is an AU (since that seems to be the only type of story I write these days…), so no spoilers, except the appearance of the characters
Progress: 1 of a perspective two figure sum
General Notes: I can't remember why I started writing this, but I got the inspiration from somewhere. Anyway, I may criticize religion at random intervals in this story, so please don't read if that's not your thing. This was written as a humor story (I can't ever seem to get the humor correct), which basically means I'll be ranting a fair bit on tangents before reining myself back to the original storyline. This will all be pretty much written during my idiotic moments, and I will not be doing much editing where removing unrelated material is concerned, so I do hope all who read do not mind much. As seems to be happening a lot with my Card Captor stories, my characters are out of character. Ah well…anyway, hope you all enjoy it and review when you're done.
Genre: Romance/Humor, also some supernatural bits and pieces.
Music: Gladiator Soundtrack
Summary: Someone is trying to break into both Heaven and Hell, just when the Seals of both planes were released, throwing both Heaven and Hell into a state of confusion. Amongst the many Angels and Demons struggling to resolve the problem is the angel Sakura and the demon Syaoran, friends despite their differences and desperate to save both Heaven and Hell, as well as the human plane Earth before it is too late. Or at least…one of them is.

Heaven and Hell

1

Heaven is guarded by one grand gate while Hell is blocked by seven. Only a few have wondered about this fact in the past, and even fewer have ever discovered anything related to the truth. One suggestion was that Hell's gates were erected by God to keep the Devil and all his loyal fallen angels (later on known as demons) within its confines, never to escape. But that is hardly true. In reality, Hell's gates were pulled up not to confine souls within, but to keep unwanted souls out.

The concept of Heaven and Hell has long been obscured and played with over the years. When one encounters the word "Hell", one instantly associates it with an unpleasant place reserved for those who sin. However, this is only the outcome of years of misunderstanding. Hell is not a place where the temperatures are always hot, nor is it surrounded by evil creatures with horns and pointed tails. Similarly, Heaven is not just some realm for those pure of spirit, guarded by fateful, pleasant angels. In reality, neither is too different from the other, only Hell has a bad reputation under its belt.

No human who has ever visited either Heaven or Hell is alive to tell the tale, and so in its place, other humans have made up stories. However, Heaven definitely should never be associated with complete purity, nor should Hell be linked immediately to absolute evil.

This is the true story of Heaven and Hell.

2

The city streets swarmed with life, undeterred by the darkness that veiled the sky above. In the olden days, this would have been resting time for humans. But Tom Edison happened, and now streetlamps shone like beacons every few meters, and every building glowed with lights of varying colors. Using stars and the moon as sources of light had become something only strange hermits living so far away that it could only be described as wasteland, and even they had satellite dishes sitting high above their houses over the solar paneling roofing, both sending and receiving signals every millisecond and keeping the "hermit" up-to-date with what was happening with the rest of the world. In fact, even the "hermit" had a lot of light, with his solar panels and all. After the first few years, he was probably living off the excess energy that his trusty roof leached off the sun, earning himself a good deal more on top of the cows grazing in the various pastures on his thirty acre property. Yes, the "hermit" had it pretty damn good. In fact, the "hermit" with his high-tech house was probably not a hermit anymore. It would after all be no big deal for him to order a great deal of alcohol off his high-tech refrigerator (which probably has a voice), call a group of his friends over from other parts of wasteland with his high-tech phone (which would use IP technology, allowing him to call people halfway across the world in Canada for no more than five cents per hour), and spend days drinking and playing cards and watching football off his high-tech plasma television which would easily take up a good portion of the wall (and was obviously connected to his satellite dish, which probably had endured a bit of tweaking itself from one or two of the hermit's friends in the past and could now access Top-Secret military channels filled with non stop porn twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, usually used only by military personnel). Yes, it would only seem fair that the other hermits would kick him out of hermitude, not that any of the other hermits living in their respective high-tech houses around the world were really hermits themselves. But explaining would take up too much time. In any case, it was all Thomas Edison's fault that now Sakura could not find a single dark place in the city. Not that she liked dark places, but they generally helped obscure the fact that she had wings sticking out her back.

The brunet angel fell lightly to a seat on top of a streetlamp, her legs swinging under her as she gazed bored at the city beneath. She instantly spotted four men who obviously had way too much to drink, and as a result kept walking into walls and poles and then either apologizing profusely to the object in question or starting a fight with it. As far as Sakura could tell, the offending objects were winning, and two men were already sporting very bloody foreheads from smashing it repetitively into the wall in an attempt to stun the "enemy". Sakura felt an eyebrow twitch, and turned away instantly in search of something less so pathetic to look at. A car caught her attention. It was a silver convertible with its roof down, something which was particularly strange during peak crime hour in the city on a Friday when all the criminals were busy trying to round up cash to spend over the weekend. The car screeched to a halt next to the lamp post she was sitting on, startling a man who had been arguing with a letterbox. The man complained loudly to the driver for interrupting his most engaging conversation with "Ms. Bigrack", and the driver apologized profusely. It might have sounded sincere, but the smirk on the driver's face was far from it. It looked like the man was going to complain again, but Driver pulled out a revolver and put a bullet into the ground beside the drunken man's feet. The man shrieked and ran, managing to cover more distance and retain his balance much better than before. The other idiots within the vicinity decided to take the shot fired as a sign to go home as well, for there was not a drunk man in sight within two minutes of the trigger being pulled. Driver looked up at Sakura sitting on the streetlamp pole and smirked, bidding her down with one hand while the other holstered his gun. Sakura sighed and jumped, landing gracefully on the ground beside Driver without ruffling her feathers, the man was such an exhibitionist.

'Sakura!' He smiled, taking her in a hug. The angel protested, but Driver would hear none of it as he enclosed her in a tight embrace. When he let go, the stupid smile was still on his face.

'Syaoran.' She acknowledged with a nod of her head. 'You're late.'

'Had to make a pit stop on the way to help an old lady cross the street.' He replied calmly, leaning backwards against his car. Sakura snorted, her green eyes showing obvious skepticism.

'Sure you did Syaoran.' She muttered back sardonically. 'There are just so many old ladies wandering around the city at this time of the night who need demons to help them cross the street. I'm surprised she did not attack you with her walking stick for trying to approach her, especially wearing that stupid trench coat of yours.'

'Hey, don't bag the trench coat.' Syaoran defended immediately, amber eyes flashing. 'I happen to like it.'

'It makes you look like you just stepped out of a Marvel comic.' Sakura intoned, giving the coat a look of distaste before staring up at her companion. 'So, heard anything recently.'

'Hmm...' Syaoran looked considerate. 'Lucifer told me off for meeting you again and threatened to demote me from being right under him on the hierarchy if it continued, but he won't actually do anything because he's almost my brother, and brothers don't do that sort of thing to each other. That and he told me that I can't cook if my life depended on it, well, that's why we have a cook so I don't know why he's making such a fuss about it.'

'Syaoran...' Sakura looked tired. 'For once in your life, do try to be slightly serious. We may actually have a problem on our hands. The seal in the Forbidden Temple has been broken, and somebody has been attacking at the main gate of Heaven! That sort of thing just doesn't happen Syaoran.'

'Yea, the seal broke in Hell as well.' Syaoran admitted, lighting a cigarette and taking a long drag. Sakura glared in distaste, but did not comment. 'And some idiot has been attacking at the First Gate as well, but unlike Heaven, we in Hell are more intelligent. We had the brains to erect seven, so one gate falling isn't as much worry to us as it is to you.'

'Syaoran, I'm worried.' Sakura fretted, hands flailing. 'Both seals have broken and there are people trying to sneak into Heaven and Hell, and the only lead we have is that the seal from Heaven broke and leapt into the body of a human girl.'

'Wow, that eliminates half the world's population. Nice going.' Syaoran smiled. 'That leaves you with another four billion people to sort through, but hey, that can't be too difficult. But if it makes you feel any better, we in Hell are no where closer to finding out where our seal went, not that Lucifer is particularly worried. He's just been staring at a map of Hell and devising ways to prevent the possible perpetrators from entering Hell and causing havoc. Everybody down there is on Third Level Battle Alert and the First Gate hasn't even fallen yet. I think they are all just a bit hungry for some action, seriously. I can think of a million better things to be doing. And just to clarify things, we don't know if it is actually people doing it, in fact, I highly doubt that it has anything to do with people at all.'

'Syaoran you idiot, you're not hearing me!' Sakura exploded, alerting a few stragglers who have just decided to enter the neighborhood to leave immediately. 'Of course the demons in Hell are going to be under Third Level Alert, we in Heaven have already moved up to the intermediary between Orange and Red Alert. This could really be trouble if both Heaven and Hell's Gates fall simultaneously, which seems to be the objective for these idiots who we can't see.'

'I don't think they're idiots.' Syaoran muttered thoughtfully, taking another drag from his cigarette. 'To do something like this, they must have brains. But I can't see why everybody is so worried. Why don't you all fall back and depend on the power of your oh powerful God. He'll save you.'

'Syaoran...' Sakura growled. Syaoran threw up both hands quickly, indicating surrender while the brown-haired Angel calmed down. 'You know as well as I do that God is not some divine being that knows all. He is merely in charge of Heaven, as is your half-brother is in charge of Hell. God is no closer to knowing how to prevent further mishaps from occurring as the Devil is.'

'Lucifer.' Syaoran said firmly. 'He hates being called the Devil, makes him feel evil.'

'Right...' Sakura sighed. 'In any case, I'm going to do some looking around and search for the girl holding the Divine Spirit of Heaven. I suppose you should go look for the person who now holds the Evil Spirit of Hell.'

'Must you stick so closely to human stupidity?' Syaoran asked crossly. 'We don't have an "Evil Spirit of Hell" wandering around, and anyway, why must you give it such a long name. Can't you just call it the Seal or something?'

'The seal is the thing that broke, not the thing that is now on earth, idiot.' Sakura rubbed her temples irritably. It seemed that Syaoran always had that effect on her, so much so that she did not know why they were still on speaking terms with each other, especially at such a big risk for themselves. Heaven and Hell, although not opposites, have always been against each other, and friendship between Angels and Demons were definitely not allowed.

'Fine, fine, I'll go do some looking as well.' Syaoran sighed, took one last drag from his cigarette and threw it on the ground, killing the flame with his foot. A cool wind blew by and the Angel shivered slightly, cursing herself silently for not wearing a cloak. She was just about to head off when Syaoran pulled the black trench coat around her shoulders. He gave her one of his stupid smiles, got in his car and drove off.

Sakura stared as the car rounded a corner and disappeared from her line of vision. She clutched the coat tight around her, smelling the heavy scent of tobacco smoke and rain. She gazed upwards, checking for clouds that weren't there. She sighed, gaze falling to the floor where the crushed cigarette was still smoking slightly. Funny, in all the years that she had known him, never once did she realize Syaoran smelt like rain. And tobacco too, she thought to herself, wondering just when he first picked up that habit.

The light overhead flickered once. When it came back on, Sakura was gone.

The cigarette but continued to smoke on the sidewalk.

---

To be continued…

Endnotes:

Not much to say really. Hope you all enjoyed it, and please review! I crave feedback (like practically every other author).