So this is my first one shot.

You can read this without any of my stories.

It's all Sam's point of view. Bella and him were together but then she left for a hunt and hasn't returned yet and he doesn't know where she is at. If it's in bold it means it's a dream. If it's in italics it's a memory. Then of course both is both. I'm rather proud of the way this turned out. Haha. Anyways it's based on the song Here Without You by 3 Doors Down. It inspired me to write this and it's an amazing song. So I hope you really enjoy this like I do.

If you enjoy you should check out my other stories on my page. Fighting the Unknown is complete and the sequel is in progress. The other two I am still working on.

If you really want this to turn into an actual story I can swing that but I have to get enough reviews to know people really want that.

But read and review and of course enjoy! :)

Sam POV

Dean slowed to a stop as I opened the door and jumped out bolting for the Motel office. It was December and the snow hadn't let up. The wind was strong tonight, blowing everything off the ground. As soon as I was in the office I felt warmer.

The office itself was decorated for Christmas with dim lights and a Christmas tree. The man at the desk was probably in his forties and enjoying the holidays.

"I need a room, please."

"Alrighty I just need you to sign your name here and it'll be 55 dollars."

Grabbing the clipboard I wrote down 'James&Thomas O'Conner' and pulled out the money shaking my head.

"Seven C. The room is yours from now until Monday morning. It being Christmas and all it seems fair Mr. O'Conner."

"Thank you."

As I turned around towards the door I heard the man call out, "Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays now!"

"You too." I smiled. Yeah the joys of Christmas.

I jumped back into the Impala.

Dean headed in the direction of the room and parked right out front the door. I grabbed my bag and headed inside hoping for the better.

Once the door was shut I looked around. Hideous green carpet and white walls, two beds, a cream and green colored bathroom, a broken TV and a radio. Though it wasn't anything special I had seen way worse so I found myself not complaining.

"Well this is fancy." Dean muttered sarcastically.

I just shrugged. I wasn't in the mood to argue with him.

"I need a drink. You coming?"

"No, I'm gonna stay here."

"Whatever. I'll be back later."

I nodded and dug into my duffel. Then I found what I was looking for, Dad's journal.

I laid down on the bed and started reading.

-Time Lapse-

I woke up and looked around. I must have fallen asleep. After sitting up I finally felt the chill in the room.Slowly but surely the little warmth of the room was escaping. It was December and nightfall came much faster than it used to. Along with the early night it was also early cold. The snow was almost ankle deep and it didn't look like it was done snowing for the night. As I could tell from the window near the door.

I set Dad's journal on the table on the scattered papers that I barely remembering writing. I thought about turning on the TV but realized I didn't have the attention span and settled for the radio.

I was cleaning up the papers and getting them organized when our song came on and stopped me in my tracks. I wandered to my bag and pulled out a letter I had found in Dean's bag. As soon as I felt my fingers brush against it I knew that I didn't need to read it. I already knew what it said word for word. But I had to see it. It was the only thing that made the memories real.

Dear Sam,

I hope you get this. I'm giving it to Dean, well more like leaving it on his car but it's about the same thing. If he doesn't give it to you I suppose he did it for the best. And maybe he's right. Don't be mad at him, he's trying to keep you safe. Anymore that's all he knows how to do.

I'm leaving. There's a hunt that I have to take. It hits close to home with me and I know I need to do this. You can't come. I need to do this alone. By the time I get back you'll probably be gone and I'm not sure that I'm going to try and find you.

That hurts me to write but I can't lie to you and I don't want you to wait around for me. Just know that if I want to find you I will, so don't come for me. Right now I don't want to be found. I know we had something special. We always will have that. I promise you that. Never forget that we were together. And never push off your feelings as unreal. They were real and I felt the same.

I'll be alright and I want you to be careful too. And watch out for Dean. I couldn't imagine losing either of you.

I love you always,

Belle

-Flashback-

"Dean how could you not give this to me!" I raged with letter in hand.

"Because that little bitch left you! Left us! And you're better off without her! We both are!" And with that he slammed the door behind him.

He wasn't right though.

He knew I still had the letter but he said nothing and refused to mention her name. It had been 100 days since I had seen her face and I wish I could say I had moved on but it'd be a lie.

I had gotten older, older in the heart making me wearer every day. A thousand lies were spoken to help hide my feelings inside.

-Flashback-

"Sammy!"

"Yeah, what?"

"Pay attention. You've been so unfocused lately. You sure you're alive over there?"

"I'm fine Dean, just fine."

Dean and I had been arguing more than we ever did. He wanted to kill her in a way, but there was also the fact that he loved her. In what way I didn't know but I knew he cared. When she left, though, he was furious instantly.

-Flashback-

"How could she leave? Just up and left. Didn't even say good bye, didn't even say anything for that matter. How could she? She was supposed to have our backs! We trained her! And now all of a sudden she just thinks she can leave!"

I kept looking back at Dad's journal and shook my head. I couldn't think the same. After she left she left me with a new perspective and I couldn't even look at things the same way anymore.

-Flashback-

Maybe, I thought, there was only evil in the world because the people were to narrow minded to realize what the worthwhile things were in life…

She was miles away. I knew that deep down but I forced myself to hope for the best. Every day. All day. My day I could control, mostly. But my dreams were a different story. Every night she managed to find her way into my dreams. And when the morning came the hole in my chest grew just a little.

Dean realized partly of the pain and I think that just made him madder. We didn't always fight but it's not like we got along either. I traced my memory for thoughts. Anything that didn't involve her but everything reminded me of her.

Hunts, songs, places, she was everywhere.

With every new place Dean and I went to there were miles that just kept coming and going. Closer then farther like a long but unending song. The people we meet and help gain peace of mind from us and go far out of their way to help us when we need it.

Dean keeps saying that life isn't what people make it out to be. The hunts, the music, and the places we go almost everything is overrated. I can't completely disagree with him but I hope that it gets better as life goes on.

-Flashback-

"Sammy, you ever think of giving up the fight? Think it's just not worth it anymore? This life is overrated. The people are getting dumber and dumber. The music is worse and worse. Even the hunts are getting to be a waste. No matter how many people we save I can't fight the feeling that there's really no point to everything we do..."

And here she came again. Back into my mind and back into my heart. And I was here, alone, without her. Yet tonight, it seemed to be just her and me.

Everything that I know seemed to fade away when I was with her. The further I go away from where she left me it gets harder. No matter where I go, my love for her never fades. When the last hunt comes and the evil finally falls it can be finished and done. It will be hard and maybe one will not survive but nothing can take away my love for her.

-Dream inside the Dream-

"Sammy…I'm sorry I left you. Please don't leave me…"

I opened my eyes and say my body lying on the ground. Chest covered in blood.

"No…" I whispered.

"God damn it Sam. Wake up!"

But my body didn't move

With that I woke up startled and breathing hard and fast.

I was awake and it was all a dream. One big dream with smaller memories and dreams inside, that's it. It wasn't real. But the feelings were.

The memories had been real, they had happened. The feeling I had for Belle was real too and still was alive within me.

Dean was still gone. It was almost midnight. I looked out the window and snow was still falling, though it had slowed.

I wanted to crash back down on the bed and go to sleep again but I knew my dreams were going to take control again. And as much as I wanted to see her face I couldn't risk falling apart and Dean walking in.

So I sat there with the radio on. I recognized the song that came on, it was I'll be home for Christmas sung by once again another person than before.

Their voice was strong and determined but still honest and kind. Tears came to my eyes as I listen to it closely.

Then there was a knock on the door.

Who could that be? I got up and looked out the window. Not seeing much I went to the door and opened it slowly.

"Hey stranger." An innocent voice chimed.

"Belle…" And with that I hugged her close and held her before letting her go and welcoming her inside.

She took off her coat and I really got a look at her. She was in dark blue jeans and a red long sleeve shirt. With her snow boots.

"Go take a shower Sam."

"But…why?"

"Just do it. I'm not leaving. Promise."

I didn't know what to say to that so I just nodded and closed the door behind me in the bathroom.

-Later-

I opened the door and didn't recognize the room before me.

The beds were made with different bedding; the window had lights strung around it, the radio was still playing and there was a small decorated tree. Underneath the tree there were presents wrapped and Bella reading on the ground nearby.

"What is this?"

She looked up surprised by my question. It took her a moment to answer but when she did she simply said, "This is for you."

She looked at the clock, nodded her head and kissed me. It was planned by her but still full of emotion. I had her back; I only hoped that she would stay.

When she pulled back she smiled her sweet yet devious smile. Then looking at the clock again she whispered,

"Merry Christmas Sam."