Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural, or the characters, and probably never will. Seeing what I do to them in my fics, that's probably a good thing.

Warning! This is a very dark fic. Honestly I'm in a pretty dark place right now, and I just had to write this fic. I hope you like it.

Listen to 'I'll Be There For You' by Bon Jovi

Enjoy!

"By the time you read this I will be gone."

The lone words written in Sam's neat handwriting, on a note pad left on the table of their latest motel room shake a twenty one year old Dean to the core, tearing him apart.

Dean's so worn out from their last hunt, he was only asleep for a few minutes. Surely Sam wouldn't have had the time to do anything, but still, that niggling doubt sparks an internal debate. On one hand, Dean can't believe that Sam would ever do what this note implies, but on the other hand… he's been so down lately.

What does he mean?! This can't be right, no way, Sammy would never…

Things have been kinda rough on the kid the past few months. No, no way, there's no way…

But think about it, the time he spends locked away in the bathroom, the 'accidents' that only an idiot would believe. Stop fooling yourself here Dean, you've gotta do something, before it's too late.

No way, this isn't happening, no, Sam would never even think about, and even if he did, what would he do? The weapons are locked in the trunk, I've got the key right here in my-

Dean reaches into his pocket confidently, and is brought to a crashing halt as he realises that it is missing. He practically leaps over the couch in his haste to look out the window, and sure enough, his seventeen year old, possibly suicidal brother has taken the car, and with it the majority of their weapons cache.

Shit! What the hell are you doing, Sammy?! Where've you gone?

Without any further delay, Dean runs out of the unit, towards the nearest car, an old, beat up pickup. He doesn't even think twice about breaking into it, and hot wiring it, before speeding off towards a small lookout just outside of town, he'd made fun of Sam for spending so much time there, it's the best lead he's got.

As Dean pushes the old rust bucket of a car to its limits he tries desperately to fight off the thoughts that threaten to overwhelm him, the possible scenarios, but when he reaches the lookout the reality is so much worse than he ever could've imagined.

The Impala is parked somewhat out of sight, but Dean sees it straight away, he leaps out of the car, and calls out. "Sammy!?! Sam, where are you?!"

He glances around at the area, and notices something, some kind of material, almost completely hidden from his view by an old stonewall. Dean apprehensively approaches the object, and as he rounds the corner, bringing the object into full view he cannot suppress the gasp of horror that escapes him.

Sam is lying on the ground, a 38 dropped beside him, blood splattered across the wall behind him, rapidly pouring out of a gunshot wound to his head.

In an instant Dean drops to his knees beside his baby brother, quickly trying to assess his condition, ignoring the tears blurring his vision. Sam is barely breathing, the back of his skull has been ripped apart, Dean can barely push down the wave of nausea that hits him as he realises that he can see Sam's brain, torn apart by the bullet.

Dean starts to shake as he remembers that the nearest hospital is over two hours away, he pulls out his phone and calls 911, but deep down he know that there's nothing he can do, there's no way he can get Sam help in time, he can barely believe when faced with the volume of blood that Sam is even still alive now.

Dean slips into a state of shock, frozen until he is snapped back to reality by the harsh rattle of Sam struggling to breathe, numb, unable to even think, Dean pulls his brother off the dirt, and moves so that he is cradling him against his chest.

And as he sits there, holding his baby brother tightly, his tears intermingling with the massive amount of blood that now covers him and Sam, Sam's blood, praying desperately that the ambulance can get there in time, but in his heart knowing that it won't, Dean knows as he feels Sam slipping away what he has to do.

He can't survive without Sam, protect Sam, that's his only real reason for living the look after his little brother, and now he's dying.

As Sam draws a final shuddering breathe, Dean picks up the handgun, left abandoned beside the brothers, and puts it to his own head, he pauses only briefly, whispering to Sam "I'm sorry, Sammy. I'm sorry I couldn't save you" before he gently squeezes the trigger, ending his life at the moment his brother heart finally stops beating.

The End. Maybe?

Thanks for reading! Please review, the more the better, but even just a couple of words would be great.

Do you want to read more of this, or should I leave it as a one-shot? I'm open to suggestions for a second part to this fic.