Okay, this is my first story ever so I hope that it doesn't totally suck. It was supposed to be a one shot but it turned out to be a little longer than expected so I made it a two shot. The story takes place one year after the winter war has ended.
Pairing: Renji/Ichigo
Warnings (if that's what ya want to call 'em): past character death, attempted suicide and maybe some smut and fluff in the second part.
Disclaimer: I don't own bleach just the plot in this fic.
Ichigo's P.O.V
Dream~
"Please don't. Let her go. She hasn't got anything to do with this" he whispered as he watched Aizen lift his sword to her throat. Aizen had already killed his other sister, his father and many of his comrades during the war and now he was going to kill his other sister too.
"Please don't" he begged but Aizen just laughed and cut her throat and let her fall to the floor of Las Noches.
"NOOO! YUZU!" he screamed.
~Dream end~
Kurosaki Ichigo woke up to a familiar dream once again. He had the same nightmares ever since the war ended a year ago and they didn't seem to be going away at all.
"Why won't they go away?" he mumbled to himself. He was now 19 and he lived in a small flat alone. He went to college but mostly he spent his time alone at home listening to music or watching TV. After the war he had somehow ended up pushing all his friends away. They had tried to talk to him but when they didn't get a response from him they had stopped trying. Inoue had been the last one to go but before she left him alone she had said that he could come and talk to her if he changed his mind. Sure he greeted them at school and if he saw them in the street but he never hung out with them anymore.
His shinigami-friends on the other hand hadn't even stayed in touch but then again he thought that maybe they were just busy rebuilding Soul Society and actually he wasn't even sure if he wanted to see them either.
But sometimes he couldn't stop himself from wondering what they were doing especially what Renji was doing because Renji had been the one to carry him out of Las Noches after he had killed Aizen and ended the war with that
*Knock knock*
Ichigo turned his head towards the sound. It came from the window.
'Wonder what it is', he thought. He remembered very well that only the shinigami used to come in through his bedroom window but since there weren't any trees close to his window and he highly doubted that a bird would be pecking at it either so he got up and opened the window. And in jumped no one else than…
"R-Renji?" Ichigo stuttered.
"Yep. The one and only" Renji answered with his usual grin plastered on his face. "Did ya miss me?" he asked still grinning.
"What are you doing here and how did you know where I live?"
"What? Can't I come ´n´ see how an old friend of mine is doing? And I followed your reiatsu of course. First when I arrived from Soul Society I couldn't locate it but then after a while I suddenly felt it. I must say yer control has improved a lot."
"Thanks but what do you really want?" Ichigo asked a little suspicious.
"You don't believe me?"
"Nope. Now spit it out before I kick you out again."
"Okay, okay. No need to get pissed. First, I really came to see how you were doing."
"Oh? And secondly?"
"I was wondering if I could crash here during my stay here."
"Why don't you just go to Urahara's?"
"I'm tired of him always calling me "freeloader-san" all the time. So can I stay?"
Ichigo looked at him for a while and sighed "You can stay for tonight but I dunno about the rest of your stay. I'll think about it tomorrow" he said as he walked back to his bed and lied down.
"Thanks man…..Ano, Ichigo?" Renji asked.
"What?" came an annoyed reply from the bed.
"Where am I going to sleep?"
"There's a spare futon and blankets in the closet. Take what you need from there." Ichigo said without even looking up.
"Okay. G'night."
"Hmmm…"
Renji's P.O.V.
'This is weird. He actually let me stay. I was expecting at least an argument about it.' Renji thought while he took out the futon and a blanket from the closet. 'Maybe he has changed after I last saw him or maybe something's wrong with him. Maybe I should ask him about it tomorrow. Nah, then he'll never let me stay here during my leave. I'll probably have to ask his friends if I want to know something about Ichigo' he thought and lied down on the futon and pulled the blanket over himself.
After a moment of listening to Ichigo breathe calmly Renji started to think about how he had found Ichigo from the ruins of Las Noches. Ichigo had been covered in blood, his shihakusho almost thorn to shreds and he was crying next to his sisters body. Aizen had been lying dead a little further away, his body covered in injuries caused by Ichigo going all out with his hollow on him. Renji had run to Ichigo to check if he was okay but Ichigo had just pushed him away until some other shinigami had come and carried his sister's body out of there. After that he had let Renji pick him up and carry him out of there. While they had walked Ichigo had been clutching his shihakusho and crying until he couldn't anymore and by the time they got to the gate to Soul Society he had been only sobbing in his sleep. He had carried Ichigo to Unohana-taicho but when he tried to put him down Ichigo had refused to let go and mumbled 'don't leave me'. Renji had looked at Unohana-taicho and she had just smiled and nodded that it was okay for him to stay there while she healed the sleeping teenager.
Renji was pulled back to reality by a soft whimper coming from Ichigo. The said teenager was whimpering and tossing and turning like he was in pain and to Renji it seemed like he was having a nightmare and he was just about to get up and wake Ichigo when he stopped moving an became peaceful again.
'He's still havin' nightmares about the war, huh. Maybe I really have to ask his friends how he's been doing lately 'couse I know he's too damn stubborn to admit if he has problems whit somethin'' Renji thought and closed his eyes and soon after that he fell asleep. He didn't notice that Ichigo woke several times that night to different nightmares.
~Next morning ~ Ichigo's P.O.V.
Ichigo woke up with a groan. He had slept more than usually but that didn't mean that he had slept well which he certainly hadn't. Dreams about his family dying and friends getting hurt had bugged him like they had for the past year and prevented him from sleeping properly. And on top of that he had a terrible headache.
"Damn it", he mumbled and sat up. Then he noticed the redhead sleeping on the floor and for a moment he thought 'what's he doing here?' but then the memories from last night returned.
"That's right. I promised to think about letting him stay here during his leave", he said to himself while got up and dressed. After that he went to the bathroom to brush his teeth and wash his face and it didn't take long before he was back in his room gathering and stuffing his books into his bag. Few minutes later he was standing in the doorway looking at Renji who was still sleeping peacefully. 'I wish I could sleep without disturbances like Renji ', Ichigo thought and walked out of his flat locking the door behind him.
While walking to school Ichigo was still deep in thought and that was proved by him almost getting hit by car three times during the not so long way to school. He thought about what he was going to do at lunch, after school and if he was going to let Renji stay at his place even though he already knew the answers to all those questions. At lunch he was going to sit in the art class and draw something, after school he was going to drop his stuff at his place, change clothes and go to work and then go out drinking like he did every weekend. And he was going to let Renji stay at least for now. Why? He didn't know. Maybe he had missed the redhead.
Renji's P.O.V.
Renji woke up a few hours later after Ichigo had left. He yawned and stretched a little before relaxing again. 'Wonder what time it is? Ichigo's not here so guess it's already kinda late. Should probably get up', he thought and sat up. After getting dressed he walked in to Ichigo's kitchen to look for something to eat but even after looking trough every cupboard he didn't find anything but some noodles and a frozen pizza in the freezer.
"Doesn't the kid eat anything?" he said out loud even though he knew he was alone. So instead of eating he started to look around in the small flat. Everything seemed to be as simple as possible, there was nothing unnecessary like plants or pictures on the walls. Renji walked back to Ichigo's bedroom. It was almost as plain as the rest of the flat. The sheets in the bed were black but there was a bookshelf crammed with books and a desk covered in papers and different kinds of pencils. 'Probably school work' Renji thought but decided to take a look anyway. But when he walked over to the desk he saw that they weren't school work but drawings, some in colour some in different shades of grey.
"Wow, I didn't know that Ichigo could draw so well" he said as he looked through the drawings. The drawings were of different objects: landscapes (there were pictures of the view from Ichigo's window at different times both in colour and in shades of grey), random people walking on the street, bowls with fruits, Zangetsu both as a sword and in his materialized form and other various things. But it was the last picture that caught Renji's attention. He found himself staring at a drawing of him and Rukia smiling under a sakura tree with petals falling around them.
"Amazing. Every detail is perfect" he mumbled and traced the picture with a finger. 'When did he draw this?' he thought and turned the paper around to look at the backside. It said "spring before the war". "I see. So that's what he was doing back then."
*BEEP BEEP*
Renji was pulled out of his thoughts when his communicator started beeping. H flipped it open and read the message:
"Freeloader-san, your gigai is ready to be picked up at Urahara shoten anytime you need it."
Urahara Kisuke
"Stupid Urahara" Renji mumbled as he sent his reply:
"Arigato Urahara-san. I'll be there soon."
Abarai Renji
*Sigh* "Maybe I should get going then" he said and checked what time it was. The alarm clock on Ichigo's nightstand showed 11.30. "Yep, definitely time to go." But before leaving through the window he stuffed the pictures inside his shihakusho. He was going to ask Urahara where he could find Inoue and the rest of Ichigo's friends (and maybe Ichigo himself) and them about the drawings and Ichigo.
After a few minutes of jumping from rooftop to another he reached Urahara shoten and walked in.
"Hello? Urahara-san? I came ta pick up my gigai."
"Aaah. Abarai-san, I was expecting you yesterday. Did you get in trouble on the way here?" said the blond shopkeeper who had appeared from a backroom. He was wearing his usual striped hat and holding a fan in front of his face. The ex-captain didn't seem to have changed one bit.
"Nah. I spent the night at Ichigo's place."
"At Kurosaki-san's place? How is he doing these days?"
"What? You mean you haven't seen him?"
"Correct. I saw him a couple of times right after he got back from Soul Society but after that I haven't seen him. So, how is he?"
"I'm not sure. He was acting a little strange yesterday when I arrived. He let me stay there without even an argument but I dunno if it was because he was tired or because of something more serious. His control over his reiatsu has also improved a whole lot. Apparently he can suppress it completely but sometimes his control slips, I think it happens if he's stressed, scared or annoyed."
"How do you know that?"
"Ichigo had a nightmare last night and then his reiatsu spiked a little ´n´ I think that's what happened when I first arrived from Soul Society. First I couldn't feel it at all ´n´ then I suddenly could, maybe he had another nightmare before I came because he was awake when I arrived there."
"You seem to have analyzed this already, Abarai-san. You think the nightmares might be about the war?"
"Dunno. Maybe. After all, he lost his whole family."
"My, my. You have been observant, haven't you? Maybe you should try and talk to him even though he'll probably say that everything's alright, the stubborn person he is."
"Shut up. That's why I came here besides ta get my gigai. Ya wouldn't happen to know where to find Ichigo ´n´ his friends?"
"I'm pretty sure that their lunch break starts in about 15 minutes. Inoue-san mentioned once that they usually eat at the school rooftop. They all go to the same school but they take different classes. Ishida-san is studying to become a doctor, Inoue-san studies to become a nurse I think and I believe that Sado-san studies have something to do with music."
"What about Ichigo?"
"I'm not sure but I've heard rumors that he'd be majoring in art but somehow I find it hard to believe that Kurosaki-san would be an arty person."
"No, it might be true. Look at these. They're from Ichigo's room" Renji said and pulled the stack of drawings from his shihakusho and handed them to Urahara. While Urahara was looking through them he got into his gigai in the other room and after that he walked back to the front of the shop.
"Well?" he asked.
"It seems like Kurosaki-san has been hiding hi talent from us for a very long time" Urahara said and handed back the papers. "Especially the last one was really good."
"Can ya tell me where the school is?"
"Just follow Inoue-san's reiatsu and you should find it. By the way, are you going to stay at Kurosaki-san's place for the rest of your leave?"
"I dunno yet. Ichigo said he was gonna think about it so I gotta find him and ask about it."
"In case he refuses you're always welcome here Freeloader-san."
"Shut up ´n´ thanks for the gigai. See ya around" Renji said and walked out of the small shop. When outside he started to scan the town for Inoue Orihime's reiatsu. It didn't take long to locate it since she tried to hide herself unless it was necessary. He started to run towards it so he would make it before their lunch break ended.
~10 minutes later~
Renji was walking up the stairs to the school rooftop. It had been easy to find the school and only a little harder to find the way to the roof through the school corridors. His looks had earned him lots of looks from the students but he just ignored them. He reached the top of the stairs and stepped out through the door.
"Abarai-kun! It's nice to see you again. How have you been? What are you doing here? Are you on a mission? When …" Orihime started blabbering as she saw him and run to him to hug him.
"Calm down Orihime-chan. It's nice ta see ya too. Besides lots of work I've been fine but now I'm on leave for the next three months. Now can ya let go of me, can't breathe."
"Oh, sorry." She said and let go. "But why did you come here on your leave? Not that we don't want you here but … I mean …" she said waved her hands in front of her.
"Ya mean why I came here instead of staying in Soul Society?"
"Yes that's what I meant."
"Came ta see Ichigo. And you guys of course. By the way where's Ichigo?"
Orihime's smile faded.
"He's probably in the art class like always." Ishida said. "He doesn't eat with us anymore; actually I'm not sure he eats at all. I've heard rumours that he just sits and draws something during the breaks but I haven't seen it myself."
"Neither have I." Chad said. "And I don't think anyone of us has seen his works so we don't know how good he is.
"He's really good." Renji said.
"How do you know?" Orihime asked.
"Look for your selves" he said and handed the stack of pictures to her. "I stayed at his place last night ´n´ found these on his desk."
"Wow, these are amazing. Look Sado-kun, Ishida-kun, it's a picture of Kuchiki-san and Abarai-kun."
"Hate to admit it but seems like Kurosaki is really good at this. Maybe he actually had a good reason to stop hanging out with us." Ishida stated.
"Wait a minute. He doesn't hang out with you anymore? Why?"
"We don't know." Chad said. "After the war he sold the clinic, moved to a small flat somewhere and stopped talking to people any more than necessary. From what I've heard he speaks only if being spoken to. He's just not the same Ichigo we used to know."
"I see he really has changed. Gotta talk ta him later. Any idea where ta find him after school?"
*RIIING*
"Oh, we have to go now. Sorry but I don't know where to find Kurosaki-kun for sure but maybe you should try the art class or his place. I think he gets off earlier than we do" Orihime said apologetically. "Can we talk some more after school?"
"Sure. I'll meet ya outside when ya get off. At what time?"
"At four o'clock. See you then" Orihime chirped and waved as she ran down the hall.
Renji stayed on the roof for a while before deciding to go back to Ichigo's flat.
Ichigo's P.O.V.
Ichigo was sitting alone in the art class during the lunch break. All other students were somewhere outside eating while inside drawing since he didn't eat at school anymore. Actually he didn't eat much outside school either because he simply hadn't felt like eating a lot after the war.
Ichigo sighed and straightened up a little in his chair. He put his pencil down after adding the finishing touches to the picture of a bouquet of flowers lying in front of him.
"Flowers. How girly." he said to himself even though he didn't really care. He took his things and left for his next class. After that he was going to go home, change clothes and go to work in the library for a few hours. Then it was time to drinking and get totally wasted once again. "Can't wait until then," he mumbled as he walked through the hallways.
He arrived to his classroom and sat down for another boring class.
Renji's P.O.V.
"Damn it! How hard can it be to find a damn flat?"
Renji was currently extremely annoyed because he couldn't find Ichigo's flat. He knew how to match a person with a place based on the spiritual signature but this was somehow harder because Ichigo had learned to suppress his reiatsu completely but there were some places where his control had slipped and left a trace. He had already been to two places and was now on his way to the third when his communicator started beeping.
"Damn hollows! Why do they always pop up when you least need them," he said frustrated about the new problem but took out his gikongan anyway and popped one into his mouth.
"Stay here" he said to the soul now habiting his gigai and ran of to mind the hollow that had appeared.
"Yes master" the soul answered and sat down on a bench to take a nap because it was a really lazy soul that pretty much always slept when it had to wait for Renji to come back.
Renji jumped from rooftop to rooftop until he saw an ugly hollow sitting on the roof of a building up ahead.
"Well aren't ya an ugly one? I'm gonna make ya regret that ya ever decided to show up here. HOWL ZABIMARU!" Renji shouted as he jumped towards the hollow and released his zanpankuto. But to his surprise the hollow dodged by spreading its wings and flying a little higher up.
"HAHAA! Did you think you could defeat me that easily, little shinigami?" it cackled. "That's why you always get killed by us, because you underestimate us."
"Ya think yer better than me because ya dodged one blow? Think again ´cause there's no freakin´ way that I'm gonna lose ta a filthy hollow like ya!" Renji shot back and started a new attack.
~about 45 minutes later~
Renji was still trying to dispose of the hollow because it had shown to be a little harder than he thought since the hollow could fly. It stayed out of his range and shot some kind of acid from its mouth at him so he had to dodge.
"Damn it" Renji growled. He was now extremely annoyed and had run out of ideas of how to kill the annoying thing flying above him a long time ago. Then it hit him. A grin spread across his face as he put his plan into action.
"HOWL ZABIMARU" he commanded and Zabimaru extended once again.
"HAHAHAAA! Haven't I told you already that that won't work on me, little shinigami" the hollow cackled and turned around to look after the tip of Zabimaru.
"Destructive art 31: Shakkahou!" The hollow turned around but too late. The spell had hit it square in the face between its eyes.
"NOOOOO! This can't be happening" it shrieked while Renji just smirked at it.
"Told ya I would defeat ya. Now I gotta go an' continue with what I was doin' before ya so rudely interrupted me. Bye bye." And with that he shunpoed back to his gigai.
~a few minutes later~
Renji was standing in front of an apartment block that he recognized as Ichigo's. He walked to the backside, scanned the wall for Ichigo's bedroom window and when he found it he got out of his gigai and jumped up look for Ichigo. Soon he noticed that Ichigo wasn't at home and it was almost 4 o'clock so he had to go. When he returned to the bedroom he saw a piece of paper taped onto the window that he had missed on the way in. He took it and read it:
Renji,
You can stay here at least for now. I'll be home late so don't bother waiting. There's a spare key on the table so you don't have to use the window with your gigai but don't lose it.
Ichigo
'Okay, now he's creeping me out. He's lettin' me stay without even a fight. Something's definitely wrong with him. Gotta talk ta him when he gets back no mater how late it is. But now I gotta go an´ see the others' he thought and jumped out after he had taken the key from the table.
Ichigo's P.O.V.
Ichigo was standing between two shelves in the library organizing books. Yes, he worked in a library and he knew that if Renji found out he would probably laugh his ass off but he liked the peaceful atmosphere there and the fact that very few people knew him there and because very few of his friends went to the library since their college had one of its own.
He had been working for four hours now, organizing books and helping people find what they were looking for, and in an hour he would be free to go.
~about an hour later~
After a short walk from the library Ichigo was standing outside a small bar he usually went to every weekend. He stared at the blinking sign on the roof for a while and sighed and walked in. When inside he sat down on his usual place in a corner and ordered a drink which was going to be the first of the many he would be having this night.
~sometime later that evening~ Renji's P.O.V
Renji stepped in through the door to Ichigo's flat and tried to be quiet since it was almost 2AM and he didn't want to wake the neighbors. He saw Ichigo's shoes on the floor so he guessed that he was home and the lights were on he was probably awake too. Renji walked to the kitchen but no one was there so he went to the bedroom but no one was there either so he went back to the living room from where one could go to all the other rooms. He stood still and listened for any sounds from the rooms and after a while he heard something from the bathroom. He walked to the door and listened again. What he heard surprised him big time. Ichigo was sobbing quietly which was kinda unnerving since Ichigo wasn't the kind of person who cried often. 'He must be really hurt mentally if he's crying and has pushed all his friends away' Renji thought and decided to knock and see if Ichigo was okay.
"Ichigo? Ichigo are ya okay?" he asked carefully.
"G-go away R-Renji. Leave m-me alone, I-I'm f-fine" came the muffled reply from behind the door.
"Ya don't sound too good ta me an' besides, I wanna talk ta ya so I'm breakin' this door now if ya don't open it now."
"N-no you won't. I'm f-fine so go away already. We can talk later."
"That's it. I'm coming in now 'cause yer not okay an' we need ta talk now." And with that Renji kicked the door open. The sight that greeted him inside wasn't pretty.
"Ichigo!"
Thanx for reading. Hope ya liked it.