AN: Okay, I know I'm supposed to be on hiatus, but with the end of Angel Beats! last Saturday, I couldn't get this concept out of my head.
Angel Beats! is property of Key Visual Arts, Aniplex, and PA Works. Please don't sue me, as flattering as that may be.
"I might have said it before, but I want to be with you," intoned the orange-haired boy solemnly as the sun streaked down the horizon in the distance, its rays slowly bearing down on the boy.
In front of him was a small, white-haired girl, looking at him passively with great interest in his words. She was standing on the stone steps on a level above him, looking down at the baseball diamond in the distance, where a few students could be seen playing a game. At the level she was standing, her eyes were level with the boy's eyes, looking at him intently as he began to speak once more.
"It's because I…" trailed the boy off into silence, courage not coming to him momentarily for him to say the words he so longed to tell the girl.
The girl took his fumble as an opportunity to walk down the steps past him, stopping a meter away from him as his eyes tracked her progress.
"I… really… love you," the boy said suddenly, an imploring look on his face.
Without waiting for the girl to react, the boy took a big step, in more ways than one, and hugged the girl, gently cradling her in his arms, leaning her against his chest.
"I love you," he whispered once more, loud enough for just the girl to hear him.
She didn't react despite being hugged, but after a short while, she closed her eyes and a small smile appeared on her lips. She snuggled further within his embrace, and she continued to smile serenely for a short while.
"Why aren't you saying anything?" asked the boy tentatively, afraid that his actions may have ruined their current friendship. The thought of losing her caused him to unconsciously raise his voice by an octave.
"I will not accept your feelings," said the girl softly.
The boy felt stunned to his very core; his worst fears were confirmed. Right here and right now, the girl he had grown to love over time, a time whose length he didn't even have the slightest idea of, bluntly said that she was not going to accept his feelings.
In a pained voice, he asked her, "Why?"
The girl opened her eyes, still not looking at the boy, yet still locked in his embrace.
"If I accept your feelings, I'm going to disappear from this place."
Confusion punctuated the boy's facial features, as he could only ask, "Why?"
"The reason that I came here to this place, this 'afterlife'… it was all to thank you, Yuzuru," said the girl.
"What do you mean?" asked Yuzuru, still gently cradling the girl's head in his hands.
"In my life, I was able to remain living because of your heart," said the girl softly, gently placing her hand on Yuzuru's chest.
She wriggled out of his embrace, and looked at the boy in front of her.
"Even now, your heart is beating in my chest," said the girl quietly, placing both of her hands on her chest. "My reason for being here… my life's regret was that I was never able to properly thank the person who saved my life by donating their heart for my operation."
She paused momentarily, and then continued.
"I wanted to tell that person badly how much I was indebted to them. I wanted to completely express my heartfelt thanks to the person who had donated their heart to save my life. That regret was so great that I was able to enter this 'afterlife', a place originally for people who weren't able to live out good lives due to the skeletons in their closets."
"No way…" whispered Yuzuru, completely stunned and blindsided by this revelation from the girl he had grown to love. As he died in the previous life due to starvation and dehydration following a train accident, he had indicated that his organs were available for recovery and transplanting on the health card in his wallet. The odds that the person he had saved in the previous life was the person he had fallen for in the "afterlife" was too staggering to consider. Some people would like to call such a thing as "destiny", or "fate".
"But… how did you know that my heart was the heart used in your transplant?" asked Yuzuru.
The girl walked by him and said,
"I realized it when you first appeared in this world, not knowing anything. You asked me to prove that you couldn't die, so I stabbed you, as you may recall. When that happened, there was a gaping void where your heart should have been. Even now, you don't have a physical heart; that heart is beating within my chest, a clear sign of the regret that led me to this world to begin with."
Yuzuru moved to stand beside the girl, who was looking down at a pool of shimmering water that was located on either side of the wide stone steps that led down to the terrace.
"But how were you able to pinpoint that the heart you received was mine?" asked Yuzuru.
"In the infirmary, when I was recovering from an internal battle that came about from absorbing the five-score of aggressive clones that Harmonics created. While you looked after me, you fell asleep on my chest, right above where my heart is located. Your body recognized the beat of its own heart, and you recovered your memories, which you told me about the moment you woke up," said the girl simply.
Yuzuru was stunned into silence, while the girl closed her eyes momentarily, contemplating her inner turmoil. She also loved Yuzuru, and she had already thanked him. If she accepted his feelings, she would disappear. She didn't know what choice to take; to ignore his feelings so that she could physically exist near him, or to accept his, and by extension her own feelings, disappearing from this world afterwards.
In a heartbeat like that of an angel, she knew the choice she would make. Opening her eyes, she continued to gaze down at the pool of water when she spoke.
"Please… Yuzuru," she said quietly, turning around slowly to face him with a smile on her face. "Say what you told me earlier once more."
The one action Otonashi Yuzuru would not want to repeat. He knew that if he told her what he felt about her once more, she would disappear from this world, leaving him behind. He didn't want that to happen.
""N-No! I can't do that! If I do that, you're going to disappear!" exclaimed Yuzuru in despair. "Your request is leaving me in despair, Kanade!" [1]
Undaunted, Kanade pressed on in her request; to hear the feelings of the person she truly loved once more so that she could finally be at peace.
"Please, Yuzuru!" pleaded Kanade.
A wave of anguish settled over Yuzuru, his hands on his chest.
"No… I just can't do it," he spat out, a pained look on his face, shaking his head vigorously.
"Yuzuru!" implored Kanade.
Yuzuru choked momentarily, and he knew that he had no choice. Tears began to drip from his eyes, while his facial muscles involuntarily twitched due to the bittersweet direction this was headed.
"Prove it to me! I want to also believe what you always believed, Yuzuru!" exclaimed Kanade, looking straight at his eyes. "Living is wonderful, you told me. So please, let me experience what you truly believed in."
And in a fell swoop, Yuzuru was won over against his own personal desires to have Kanade stay with him in this world. He closed his eyes for a few seconds while Kanade looked at him expectantly, the tears continuously flowing from them. Reluctantly, he opened his eyes a short time later; gritting his teeth at the deed he was going to do.
"Kanade… I love you," he whispered gently, belying his fears at what he knew was destined to happen.
He moved towards her and she moved towards him, and they met in the middle, embracing each other, trying to convey the fiery love they held for the other.
"Let's be together forever, Kanade," said Yuzuru, tears pouring down his face onto her shoulders, happy that she had accepted his love and sad that she was going to disappear from this world due to that same thing.
"Thank you, Yuzuru…," whispered Kanade into his chest.
"Stay with me forever… Please…," choked out Yuzuru, dreading the moment she would disappear from his sight.
"Thank you so much… for loving me," whispered Kanade.
"Kanade, I love you!" repeated Yuzuru, the anguish breaking further into his voice, as though he was imploring the heavens not to take Kanade away from him. He felt that the more he expressed his love for her, the more that God would take pity on him and let her remain with him.
She nodded, nuzzling his chest, and replied once more,
"Thank you so much for loving me…"
The two began to slip into calling each others' names, trying to convey the love they felt through saying each others' name repeatedly.
"Please, please, don't disappear on me, Kanade!" wailed Yuzuru in despair, sobbing uncontrollably now.
Kanade didn't mind in the slightest; she was cherishing this moment, a moment that she would surely remember when she crossed over into the next life.
"Promise me… Promise me that we'll meet again, Kanade. I don't care how, when, or where, but I want to meet you again, somehow," spluttered Yuzuru.
"This gift of life that you gave me… Thank you so much, Yuzuru," mumbled Kanade, nodding and nuzzling Yuzuru's chest for the last time.
In an instant, the weight that Yuzuru was cradling in his arms disappeared, and he nearly fell flat on his face due to his awkward position. He knelt on the ground, grabbing at the air, scrabbling for any remains of the girl he had held in his arms mere seconds before, but he found nothing. Not a trace of Kanade. It was as if she never existed, as if she never was in his arms, as if he never told her that he loved her, as if she never expressed that she felt the same way.
Yuzuru breathed wildly, a glazed look in his eyes, the tears still streaming uncontrollably from them. He looked skyward and hugged his own chest, an insurmountable void opening up within himself.
"Kanade!" he screamed in despair, looking skyward to a God he imagined to be there, sitting on his throne, knowing that he took away the thing he cherished the most on this world.
As Otonashi Yuzuru contemplated being alone for eternity in this world with the loss of Tachibana Kanade, he suddenly felt light; in fact, he felt like he was light itself.
"What's happening to me?" he looked at his body in disbelief.
He was rapidly disintegrating into light, and before he knew it, everything in his vision faded to white.
"Mom, I'll go shopping for today's dinner now!" shouted Hanazawa Kanade[2] as she changed from her indoor shoes into her outdoor shoes. "We'll need basil leaves for spaghetti al-pesto, right?"
"The money for the greens is on the counter by the door Kanade-chan!" her mother called from the kitchen as she began to make preparations for kani salad as well.
"Roger that Mom!" called back Kanade as she took the cash from the counter by the door. As she stepped out of the door, the glazing heat of the early afternoon sun bore down on her mercilessly.
"Oh dear; I'm going to need something to shield me from this ridiculous summer heat," she muttered to herself.
She dashed back inside the house to grab an umbrella and a wide-brimmed hat that she placed neatly on top of her neatly trimmed hair that barely reached her shoulders. She noted that it was fortunate that she chose to tie her hair in a ponytail and wear a skirt on this hot day and set out from her house on the outskirts of the city towards the urban shopping district.
It wasn't exactly within walking distance, and to her dismay, her bicycle was in the shop for repairs; an accident the week earlier had left one of the bike's inner tubes busted. She opened the umbrella and sauntered towards the bus stop where she would take a 5 kilometer bus ride to the shopping district.
When she arrived at the bus stop, she saw that it was deserted save for a girl in a tracksuit who appeared to be steadily sweating. Kanade guessed that the girl was jogging to or from somewhere, but under this ridiculous heat? She noticed the girl's yellow ribbon affixed on top of her magenta coloured hair and immediately thought that that ribbon would completely absorb heat. The girl's hair was about as long as Kanade's and something about the girl piqued her interest; it was as though she had seen her before. Oddly, she thought that she had fought this girl before… Oh but no, that was impossible. Kanade was one of the least violent people in her school; sure, she had 1st dan in Shotokan karate but she only fought in self-defense, and ever since she put an unarmed mugger her age in his place did she actually put her skills in combat to use. She sensed that this girl would be really great to spar with, she also felt an onee-chan vibe coming from her for some unknown reason.
Shoving all these irrational thoughts aside, she looked at the girl, who caught her looking at her. The girl with magenta-coloured hair raised an eyebrow, and Kanade looked away in embarrassment.
For the next three minutes she waited for the bus, she felt the girl's eyes appraising her, staring at her, when she finally heard the low rumble of a bus headed toward her direction.
"The Doppler Effect in action," she thought absentmindedly, trying to distract herself from the piercing stare she knew that the girl in the tracksuit had on her.
The bus stopped in front of the station and Kanade got on, giving the tracksuit girl one last look before she boarded the bus. Their eyes met and instantly, both of them knew that they had met somewhere before, but neither could remember the circumstances of this event.
As the bus sped away, Sakurai Yuri[3] was wiping her sweat off, only beginning to wonder where she had met the petite girl in a jacket and skirt before...
Kamiya Yuzuru[4] was late. He was supposed to arrive at the auto-store about ten minutes ago for his shift, yet he was still at his home, hurriedly dressing up in a white shirt, a jacket with the scheme of military fatigues, and jeans.
"Damn, the chief's really going to murder me for being late on a Saturday," cursed Yuzuru.
He had woken up late because he spent the entire evening and twilight hours playing a visual novel. He only fell asleep at 6 in the morning when he was fed up with getting bad ends repeatedly due to innocuous choices such as "watching TV" or "resting and having a snack" after dinner. When he finally got his clothing into order, he left the house in a hurry without bidding goodbye to his parents, cursing the name "Matou Sakura[5]" while he took a brisk walk towards the train station that he lived near to. He had to take a short train ride to get to the shopping district, where he worked in a Mitsubishi auto-store.
Lately, he'd been getting this weird feeling that this day would be an important day in his life, a day that would have a life changing experience occur or something along those lines. As he was standing in the train, he thought about his personal life all of a sudden.
He was quite popular in his school, and he'd often get confessed to by multitudes of girls. He'd always turn them down though, because he was a believer in the single-bullet theory. He felt that his heart had been in someone else's all along, and when he met that person, he would know that she was truly the one.
The train called out his stop and he jostled amongst the other passengers, exiting the station and headed towards the Mitsubishi shop where he worked, dreading the wrath that his boss would have in store for him. He walked briskly, not taking note of his surroundings, when he heard a tune that he swore he had heard once before.
naiteru kimi koso kodoku na kimi koso
tadashii yo ningenrashii yo
otoshita namida ga kou iu yo
konna ni mo utsukushii uso ja nai hontou no bokura o arigatou
He turned to his left and saw a petite girl in a blue jacket and skirt, her angelic white hair in a ponytail, a wide-brimmed hat on her head quietly singing the song while leaning against the wall. She took her phone out from her bag and opened it.
The girl then eased away from the wall and she began to walk away, leaving Yuzuru to ponder just how he knew that song.
"My Song...," muttered Yuzuru to himself.
At that moment, it hit him; this girl was suddenly very interesting to him. He threw away all his worries for being late for work and turned around, walking briskly so as to catch up with the girl who was walking away. He reached her and extended his right hand, gently touching her on her left shoulder.
"Uh, excuse me, do I know you?" inquired Yuzuru in a gentle tone.
The girl turned to face him and their eyes met. In that instant, Yuzuru knew that she was the one, the girl that had his heart. He didn't know how that was possible, but he just knew.
A faint memory stirred within him, and he knew that there was one way to check if he was right.
"Yes?" inquired the girl timidly, looking at him.
"Can I ask you… What is your first name?" asked Yuzuru nervously.
The girl, sensing no hostility whatsoever from Yuzuru, felt that she could trust him enough to tell him her full name.
"My first name is Kanade. My name is Hanazawa Kanade. If it's not too much trouble, could you also introduce yourself to me?" asked Kanade.
Yuzuru's heart jumped in his chest; he was right, she was the one. At that moment, everything came back to him; the events of the "afterlife", his time with the SSS, and most of all, the days where he fell in love with Tachibana Kanade. Though her last name was different, he was sure that it was her. Keeping calm, he said in a steady voice,
"My name is Kamiya Yuzuru. Pleased to meet you… Kanade."
The girl's eyes grew wide and suddenly they shimmered in tears; tears that began to cascade down her face uncontrollably.
"It's you, Yuzuru. After all this time, it's you. I've been waiting my entire life for this moment, the moment where we'd meet again, Yuzuru," whispered Kanade softly.
"It was a promise, remember, Kanade?" chuckled Yuzuru.
"Yes. Yes it was a promise Yuzuru," mumbled Kanade as she moved forward and hugged Yuzuru, dropping the umbrella she held in her hands.
People began to stare at them but they didn't care; against all odds, Otonashi Yuzuru and Tachibana Kanade had met again in the next life.
"Kanade… I love you," said Yuzuru.
"And I love you too, Yuzuru," replied Kanade, tiptoeing and kissing him on the lips.
[1] – An extremely unsubtle reference to Itoshiki Nozomu from Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei.
[2] – I picked the surname Hanazawa because Kanade is voiced by seiyuu Hanazawa Kana.
[3] – In the same vein, Sakurai because Yurippe is voiced by seiyuu Sakurai Harumi.
[4] – In the same vein, Kamiya because Yuzuru is voiced by seiyuu Kamiya Hiroshi.
[5] – Matou Sakura of the Visual Novel Fate/stay night is the heroine of the Heaven's Feel route, which is littered with the most Bad Ends in the game. Funnily enough, Kamiya Hiroshi voices Matou Shinji in Fate/stay night.
I found it particularly heartwarming that it was Iwasawa's last song that brought Kanade and Yuzuru together again in the next life. I cried buckets at the Angel Beats! finale. ;_;
Read and review please! :)