Title: Being Slytherine
Author: Paulette909 a.k.a. Cooper666 and BornAgainPagan
Rating: PG
Spoilers: none, set in Pansy's sixth year
Summary: There are good days and bad days. Pansy has a bad day.
Disclaimer: It's all JKRowlings
Dedication: Jessyca, Jessica, Ally, Parveen, Maris, Amanda and Kristina
Response to the Featured Challenge at Harryimprove (yahoo group)
A/N: YEAH!!! I made the deadline! Finished it about ten minutes ago and then had hell editing it, but it's still the 31st!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I woke up with a headache. Ouch. My mind was pounding and my body felt heavier than it should have. I yawned widely and looked over at my alarm clock. Yikes, five thirty. I turned over and shut my eyes, hoping my headache would go away so I could get some more sleep when something dawned on me. I blinked and looked at the wall I was staring at. Quickly, I turned over and looked back at my alarm clock and the miniature table it sat on.
The wall was deep purplish colour and my table was painted a lighter shade of it with a clean white cloth covering it.
Huh?
What about proud green and silver, proud Slytherin colours?
My sheets and pillow were pure white and my cover was the same with the exception of the purple prints of a winged horse. My jaw dropped. But...but...Slytherin... This isn't right. My entire room was different. Different meaning everything that had been green was now purple and what had been silver was now white. Millicent was still sleeping peacefully along with Blaise in the identical beds next to me. We had been lucky enough to have one room to three girls; most rooms were packed with more. I could hear Millicent snoring softly and shivered slightly.
Millicent was nice enough, but she was...disgusting. In every aspect. She spat when she talked and her entire face was covered with zits and pimples. She didn't even try to lose her one hundred and eighty two pounds. I'm proud to say, I weigh only one hundred fifteen. But then again, my mother had forced me on a diet since I was born and I can't remember otherwise. Oh, yes, Melanie Parkinson had problems with her keeping her weight but why was I blamed?
I slipped out of my bed and was prepared to wince at the cold stone floor when something strange happened. To be exact, nothing happened. I blinked again and leaned over the bed and looked down at my feet. Holy crappers. The icy coldness that always seemed to stick with the stone flooring was gone and in its place a fresh light green carpet. I winced but not from the cold. Green carpet, purple walls and white trimmings? Ick. Who decorated this place? Lorelei Cooper?
I walked out of the bedroom and to the common room. The main colours were everywhere, with the obvious expectations like the wood tables and furniture. Paintings were hung on the walls in the same places as always but...who was that? The main painting of Salazar Slytherin that hung over our fireplace wasn't the wizard we all adored, but a woman! I think my jaw would have dropped again if it hadn't already been sore from being dropped too much.
I walked up to the fireplace and it automatically roared to life. The frame looked the same but...was that another horse? The woman was tall and was standing straight with one hand petting a tall white stallion. She was wearing a medieval amethyst-coloured gown with puffy ivory frills along the sleeves and chest and the rest of the trimmings. Her dark brown hair hung in ringlets around her face--the type of face that you look at and get inspired by, the type that make you want to achieve what they achieve because you know it's worth something--and her eyes shown with...damn. I'd never seen eyes like that. They were a wine colour that seemed to sparkle brightly. I waited for her to move or twitch or her horse give a neigh, but nothing happened. It was if--dare I say it--a muggle painting.
The name Sylvia Slytherine was written in spirally, swishing handwriting in the bottom right corner. Slytherine? Where'd the e come from?
"What are you doing up so early, Ms. Parkinson?" a smooth voice sounded behind me and whirled around to see Snape standing in his full glory of dark purplish black robes waiting expectantly.
"Professor Snape, I...uh...I...huh?" Oh, that was lame. But seriously, huh? Who is Sylvia Slytherine?
Snape raised his eyebrows. Oh damn, I hate when he does that, makes me feel stupid. His piercing eyes darted at the painting quickly and then settled back at me. "Are you feeling quite alright?"
Oh, that's a good way to make sure that I know exactly how lame I am this morning. I thought about asking about the colour scheme going on and Sylvia Slytherine, but...was it really a good idea to be asking that? Snape seemed not at all surprised at the common room or the painting, and I was a sixth year...
"I'm fine, Professor Snape," I lied, my hands twisting in knots behind my back. Lying to him is never good, he can always tell.
Snape narrowed his eyes on me and it was obvious he knew I was lying. "If you are feeling fine, Ms. Parkinson, then why do you keep calling me Snape?"
I froze. Uh, oh, I feel another 'huh' coming on. "Uh...I...Professor, I...think I should go back to bed, you're right I'm not in the best of mind. It's too early, maybe in a few hours I'll be better," I smiled my best 'how-could-this-sweet-girl-in-front-of-you-possibly-do-anything- wrong?' look that only worked on other Slytherins and never Snape or the other houses. They're too suspicious.
"Perhaps, but one question before you go," he took a step towards me and his height seemed to make him even more intimidating. That's not supposed to happen to me, only to Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws! What's happening here? "Ms. Parkinson, what is my name?"
Huh. Well, this is not good. Not good at all. Suddenly, a voice boomed out from the stairway, "I thought I heard voices. Professor Snarp, Pansy, what are you doing up so early?"
We both looked up to see Millicent half-breaking the stairs as she walked down. Snarp? His name is Snarp? This is soooooo not right! "Hello, Millicent!" I said cheerfully and bounded over to her and grabbed hold of her arm for dear life.
Snape--no, Snarp--looked at her and then narrowed his eyes on me, as if knowing I had mistaken his name and had been saved only by Millicent's good timing. "Ms. Bulstrode, I suggest the two of you go back to your beds."
We quickly agreed and left to the bedroom. The moment we were out of sight I pulled Millicent to the side of the hallway. "What happened here?"
"What do you mean?" She asked, confused.
"I mean, what happened to Snape and why is everything purple and white and what in the world is up with the horses, I mean, really, and who is Sylvia Slytherine?"
"I...are you feeling alright, Pansy?"
I scowled at her. What is wrong with these people?!?
An hour. A full hour and I know that something is wrong.
I knew that when I first woke up, but now, I know details.
They are, of course, wrong, too.
The house colours for Slytherine are purple and ivory, but most of our clothes and sheets are white. Sylvia Slytherine is one of the four members that started Hogwarts, much like Salazar Slytherin was. Our house animal-- or logo as Millicent so boldly put it--is a winged horse. Gryffinvor is our enemy house, the ones who will become supporters of Harry Potter the moment they're old enough.
That's right. Harry Potter is evil. It took me nearly ten minutes to get Millicent to say his name. I figured this much out. The same positions apply to my Hogwarts and this one except different people have different positions. Harry Potter in this world is as evil as Voldemort. What? I'm not afraid of him; I'll say his name all I want. Voldemort in this world in the Prime Minister and everyone likes him because he's so fair and nice. I swear to Salazar above me that I shuddered when Millicent called the Dark Lord nice.
Hungers are Death Eaters. For some unknown reason, this world got a sucky name and my world got the good one. Maybe we won the coin toss.
At one point, I got so annoyed at Millicent I told her to shut up and that I'd ask a Ravenclaw. She gave me the funniest look and asked if I meant a Fishtalon. Wow. I was so surprised at the horrible name that I forgot I was so annoyed at her.
Fishtalon.
Fish. Talon.
Hehehehe. Isn't that funny?
Fishtalon.
I can't help but giggle each time I hear it. The Fishtalon's (insert giggle here) are what the Hufflepuffs were, not smart enough to be Hawkelduffs (insert second giggle)--Ravenclaws--nor devious enough to be a Gryffinvor. And get this: not brave enough to be a Slytherine. Hear that? We're Goody- Two-Shoes!
You cannot imagine how shamed I felt when Millicent first described the houses. I could have cried, but I didn't because true Slytherins don't cry.
She wouldn't even say that the Fishtalons (giggle) were stupid, they are just the ones left over.
We eventually made it back the bedroom and found Blaise trying on a thousand different outfits but both of us were so tired we didn't even try to stop her.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Breakfast had been interesting. I expected Dumbledore to be there along with Snarp and the other teachers but instead, Bumblebore is the headmaster.Snarp sent me a nasty look when I laughed aloud and made everyone turn to me. The tables were plain wood and the benches looked so worn I thought I'd get blisters. The food was even worse.
I can't remember the last time I've had porridge. It was lumpy and disgusting. I barely ate.
After breakfasts, I double checked that my class orders were the same. Thankfully, they were. Kind of.
Defense Against Dark Angels was the first class of the day, along with the Gryffinvors. I don't know why I'd expected the Gryffinvors to be the same, or at least act like they do in my world. But I'd forgotten something. Harry Potter is evil. Hermoine Granger and Ron Weasley are too, but they still go to school.
Professor Bupin taught the class. Normally, the first thing he says (not that I actually listen...) is to take out our books or homework and wands. Today, he said, "Alright class, get out your books and pencils. We'll be finishing the presentations on famous law-breakers so be ready to take notes. Any volunteers to go first?"
Since when do wizards at a private school use pencils? And law-breakers?
I'm getting tired of saying this but I've got to say it: Huh?
Are you wondering what my mistake was?
Simple: I said it out loud.
Everyone turned their heads to look at me. "Pansy, is there something you'd like to say to the class?" Professor Bupin asked. This makes no sense. Lupin--Bupin--is a werewolf. He's not allowed to teach because of all the complaints.
"You're a werewolf!" I exclaimed. Maybe in this world not everybody knows and Dumbldore--Bumblebore--wants it to be a secret.
I'd expected the class to gasp in shock, to see Bupin's face go pale with dread, for an eerie silence to take over. Instead, something else happened.
They laughed.
In the real Hogwarts, no one laughed at the Slytherins without regretting it later. We're experts at hexes and curses, only the Gryffindors pissed us off and then they always paid the consequences. But here I was, in a class full of Slytherines and Gryffinvors and they're all laughing their heads off. So is Bupin.
I blushed profusely even through Slytherins don't blush. No one will know, right?
"Oh, Pansy! Werewolves aren't real. Somebody's been reading too many of her horror books!" Bupin teased, pinching my cheeks.
Oh, merciful Zeus! Salazar help me! HE PINCHED MY CHEEKS! Breathe, must breathe...
My lower lip is trembling and I don't even try to control. My eyes are frozen wide in shock and horror and I know I'm making little noises with my jaw hanging low.
The rest of the class has gone quiet, staring at me. Bupin's smile is fading and he's looking at me worriedly. "Is something wrong, Pansy? Are you feeling alright?"
I shook my head no and whispered hoarsely, "I need to see Dumbledore,"
I didn't wait for him to answer just grabbed my unopened bag and rushed out of the classroom. I ran to the common room and shouted 'Serpent's Den' as loud as I could. I waited for the painting to swing open, but instead, nothing happened. "Serpent's Den!" I screamed at it a second time.
I grasped onto the sides of the painting and pulled with all my might. The entire frame came off and I stepped back and dropped it on the floor, my breath ragged.
I realized for the first time ever that beside the outline of clean fresh paint where the painting had hung, on the same worn paint was a doorknob. I stared at it open-mouthed. Since when was there a doorknob on the Slytherin common room? I reached out and slowly twisted it.
Surprisingly, it opened.
I think if I don't figure a way to get back to the real Hogwarts, then I'll be shocked to death.
I ran through the ugly puke purple, lime green and w-something white decor (I'm angry, not creative. What adjective starts with a W can be used to describe white?) and straight into my bedroom. I jumped down face-first onto my bed.
And heard a crack.
I waited a second before pushing myself over to the wall. Two pieces of a recently broken pencil rested on the ugly bed cover. I gave a half-hearted sob as I looked at the broken wood. Usually, I would have had my wand lying on my bed in that exact same place. Although I always had it for classes and meals.
I heard a cough from behind me.
How come people never know when you just want to be alone?!?
I didn't look to see who was at the door but instead collapsed on my bed. What happened to Hogwarts? To wands, hexes, curses, Defense Against the Dark Arts, Professor Lupin, Snape, Dumbledore, silver and green, devious Slytherins, brave Gryffindors, meek Hufflepuffs and smarty-pants Ravenclaw? What happened to charms, spells, Salazar Slytherin, green robes, teasing and scaring first years, editable food, house elves, smooth benches and moving paintings and passwords?
What happened to magic?
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I ended up in the medical wards with Professor Bumblebore. Bupin had sent a student to tell Snarp, but he was to busy with his second years so the Headmaster was told. I tried to explain to him about magic but he kept twinkling his eyes and told me that my imagination was getting away from me. I learned the difference between Bumblebore and Dumbldore today.Bumblebore is a bore. A mean, nasty bore that nobody likes. True, his eyes sparkle like the stars but he's still a freak. He offered me--rather than a sweet--baloney. Who could possibly want baloney?
Dumbledore is too nice. It's a weakness. He sees the good in every person where as I--along with my fellow Slytherins--see the bad. If he sees a little good he thinks the person can be saved. A little good in a lot of bad rarely think that the person with the good and bad needs to be saved and therefore cannot be saved. I don't like him much but he was able to see the good in Professor Snape and only because of two things do I respect him. One: Professor Snape respects him. Two: He listens. The odd time when Snape thinks he ought to know, Dumbledore will listen to everything you say. No interruptions, no questions.
That is something that you rarely find. Bumblebore is like the rest. They just don't care.
I was sent to the medical ward not long after I finished talking to him and have been in bed all day. I don't know how in Tartenus I'm going to get back to my Hogwarts without magic. With magic, there might be a spell...but without? Hopeless.
And Madame Pomfrey?
I have no idea what happened but instead Monsieur de Pomper (pronounced pomp-eh, as I was told by him after he was greatly insulted by my mispronunciation,) is here. He's French. He speaks French. He says 'me talk no English' quite often. Thankfully, my father took me to France for six months a year before I started in Hogwarts and I can speak some French, although the last time I even said 'Bonjour,' was about six or seven years ago.
Monsieur de Pomper wanted to give me a sleeping pill (It's much better than sleeping potions, which normally taste bitter. You don't even taste it!...although you have to be careful not to chew it. That sucks,) but I refused to take it. Ten minutes of repeated 'je ne veux pas dormir, maintenant' (I don't want to sleep right now,) afterwards, he called Snarp, who was between classes.
Slytherins have a partial immunity against Snape's eyes, but here, in this world, I had nothing.
One piercing look and I downed that pill and glass of water so fast I almost choked. I hate to think of how much courage the other houses--the ones in my world--have to have not to run away when he comes into their vision or cry when they get scolded.
Snarp said he would wait till I was asleep before going back to his class-- seventh year Slytherines and Gryffinvors that would normally kill each other except they actually like chemistry, like me, so will work on their assigned projects with no supervision--and helping his students. I relaxed into the soft mattress and waited to be enfolded into slumber.
Twenty minutes later, I was still waiting.
My theory is that because I'm a witch, the sleeping pills don't work. Snarp looked at me like I most likely hadn't taken it and had instead drunk the water and hidden the pill. Thankfully, he didn't accuse me out loud because I think I would have confessed to it, even through I'm innocent of that crime.
Monsieur de Pomper wanted to do something called 'x-ray' on me but I refused and Snarp was merciful and didn't press it. De Pomper was going wild meanwhile Snarp read his book and I tried to sleep. He told me that he had given me his strongest pill and that yada yada yada blah blah blah. His voice is boring-er than Professor Binns on a bad day. I almost fell asleep to it.
I was lucky enough to have been rescued by Snarp, who told De Pomper to shut his trap right in front of me. I think De Pomper looked insulted, shocked and was pouting at the same time. Very laughable. And laugh I did until Snarp sent me a glare which shut my trap too. Just before lunch, Snarp told me that I could leave the ward and skip my classes for today but had to stay in the common room.
He then added that he expected to see a two page essay on his desk written in pen, single spaced on his desk tomorrow morning on the effect of the sleeping pill and all of its chemicals.
I don't think it's possible to have Snape or Snarp grant you a free day without adding some kind of homework. Although, rumor is that Snape did let a girl that had been hexed (by her older brother, a fifth year,) on her first day of Hogwarts get off scot-free. But even that isn't positive.
I went to lunch in the Great Hall.
And still regret it.
Everybody had heard of my 'fantasy' and apparently, Bumblebore had told the other teachers at sometime (I have no idea how or when,) the full story and they had had a laugh much to my chagrin. It got around to the majority of the school and the moment I was in view of all the house tables, people started pointing and laughing.
I took one look and wished that the sleeping pill had worked and I was still in the medical wards. Snarp was sitting with the other teachers with a suspicious look on his face. I wanted to blush desperately but I held my head high and walked towards the Slytherine table. I sat next to Millicent and didn't say a word to anyone the entire time.
The food was even worse than it had been at breakfast. Get this: They served cold ham sandwiches at Hogwarts.
Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!
If I don't get out of this...place soon, I'm going to starve to death. I might die of embarrassment as well, depends. Whichever way I go out, it's going to be in the very near future.
Blaise caught up with me after lunch. She had left her ruler in the common room and need it for Math Six, her next class. "So is it true?" she asked, getting that 'tell-me-so-I-can-gossip' look in her eyes.
"Is what true?"
"That you had a fit in DADA and got sent to the medical wards because you're Wiccian?"
"Wiccian? The muggle magic?" I asked offended. Only when I saw the confused look on Blaise's face did I realize what I'd said. "I mean...of course not! I'm not Wiccian because that's...not...um..."
"I know, it should be okay but everybody would have thought you were a freak but it's alright, I'll tell them that you're just a confused, mislead freak rather than some myth that you're actually sane," Blaise confided seriously in me. I pushed her away from me and continued walking, resisting the urge to giggle in public.
We walked in silence and passed the Gryffinvor common room with only two icy glares and three chuckles. We turned a corner and to my shock, up against the wall, clad in leather and silver studs, were Granger and Weasley. And what were they doing? Snogging, of course!
I think I almost died right there and then. My jaw dropped and I stopped walking. Or thinking. Hermoine Granger and Ron Weasley? I think I started sputtering but Blaise, who seemed used to it and disgusted, pulled me along and yelled "Get a room!" back at them.
I shivered at the thought of them. Damn, I'm going to have nightmares.
Blaise looked at me funny but didn't say anything else. We entered the common room in peace and Blaise grabbed her ruler and left, leaving me alone. I watched her walk to down the hallway, her bag swinging to each side when I heard something from down the hall. I walked towards the noise and turned the corner.
Neville Longbottom and Colin Creevey stood tall with their arms crossed, facing the wall. It took me a moment to realize that one of the first years was behind them. She was small for her age with fiery red hair that stood out brightly with her brown robes--a Hawkelduff colour.
She looked exactly like a younger Ginny Weasley. But that Weasley was a Gryffindor and in fifth year. Longbottom grabbed part of her robe and tugged at it leaving a shoulder exposed. He leered at her and said something nasty. Ginny seemed to pale even more and tried to push her robe over her thin t-shirt.
Ginny is a Hawkelduff. Hawkelduffs--Ravenclaws--are smart.
Longbottom and Creevey are Gryffinvors. Gryffinvors--Slytherins--are devious jerks/seducers.
Fishtalons (giggle)--Hufflepuffs--are stupid and slow.
And then there's me. A Slytherine. The brave one. A true Gryffindor would march up and stand between Ginny and the guys. But I'm not a Gryffindor, I'm a Slytherin. No E at the end. But...at the moment, right here, right now, I'm a Slytherine. Shouldn't I...Blaise and Millicent wouldn't...would they?
"Leave her alone," I commanded. Uh, oh.
Creevey turned towards me. "Well if it isn't Pitiful Parkinson. What are you going to do, you going to turn me into a frog?"
Longbottom turned slowly to me, one hand holding on Ginny's shoulder. "Yeah, go back to your cauldron,"
"Well if the two of you haven't grown spines as well as attitudes!" I exclaimed. "You betcha I'm going to turn you into frogs if you don't let her go!"
Of course, now I remember that they aren't going to believe in the slightest possible way but at least I said something. Creevey sneered and took a step towards me.
"Oh, are you? Well then, go ahead!" He urged. My eyes flared. I really hate him.
"Just go away, Creevey," I said with disgust thick in my voice.
"Make me," he challenged and walked up to me so we were face to face. I saw something flick in the corner of my eye and realized Ginny was trying to inch away. Good for her. Longbottom wasn't paying attention to her but his hand still rested on her shoulder.
"What's going on down 'ere?" a rough voice said from down the hallway. "Hagrid!" Ginny cried out. Longbottom jerked his hand away from her and backed up as Hagrid came down the hall.
But it wasn't Hagrid.
I mean, it was Hagrid.
But it wasn't.
A thin, short man with a clean shaved face and short, dark hair that resembled a toothpick wandered towards us. Apparently, this was Hagrid. Can you choke on surprise so badly you die? I think by the end of the day, I'm going to prove that theory.
"'ey, there, Ginny, what are you doin' out of class?" Hagrid asked as she huddled against him. Creevey and Longbottom seemed speechless--pitiful, and they call themselves another version of Slytherins! Ha!--and neither said a word.
"They were bothering her, I heard it from the common room." I told him. "I should get back," I fled back to the common room, ignoring Ginny's protests. I ran towards my bedroom and shut the door behind me softly. The purple interior seemed somehow comforting although the lime green still bothered me.
I slowly made my way back to my bed and sat down. I had stood up for Ginny. For a First year. And she was okay, even through all I had done was talk to her tormentors for a moment before Hagrid came. It was enough. And damn, it had felt good.
I examined my tiny table for something to write with. This is never going to happen again, I'm never going to help someone out again, because I will hopefully be in my own world soon. All I could find was a broken pencil, a dying flower, a glass of water, three murder mystery books and my alarm clock. I sighed. Nothing to write with or on since I had no paper or a sharpener.
Then suddenly, I realized something was wrong. I looked back at the alarm clock. It read five twenty nine. A.M.
That's when I woke up. Any previous thought was forgotten as I examined the appliance. It was one of the few things that I had of the muggle world at Hogwarts. It had been charmed to work on batteries, despite the fact that most electrical things wouldn't work because of all the magic. I had pressed it this morning and then opened my eyes to this muggle world.
I reached out and pressed the alarm button...
...and then rolled back over to try to get a few more minutes sleep. My head was pounding like a carpenters hammer and I felt like I'd been walked on by a giant. So much for a night of peaceful sleep. I'm beginning to think it doesn't exist. Memories of a complicated dream floated back to me. Ginny Weasley and Longbottom and Creevey...why would I dream of them? Gryffindors! I can remember Snape being normal and Dumbledore being mean and Lupin pinching my cheeks and getting laughed at...
...Damn, that's one hell of a complex dream. I opened my eyes slowly and saw Millicent and Blaise still sleeping. I closed my eyes again and tried to remember the dream. I was good, brave, and strong. Nothing evil like Death Eaters or Voldemort. I rolled flat on my back and stared at the ceiling. It was grey stone like the floor was and the walls were a dark green. My sheets are silver and the bed cover is green. There is no carpet...so why am I thinking of horses, purples and whites?
The entire dream came rushing back at me at once. I remembered details that I shouldn't have been able to remember...
...but it can't have actually happened right? It's just a dream!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I saw Crabbe and Goyle teasing a second year Ravenclaw just after breakfast. I don't know why, but I blame my headache because for some reason I marched over there and gave them a scolding they'll never forget.And for some unknown reason, when I passed Ron Weasley and Granger in the hallways, I told them that they're disgusting and to get a room. I have absolutely no idea why.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
and that's it, thank God.
Just so you know, Lorelei Cooper is my older sister. She has no fashion sense.