Title: Come Back To Me
Author: Luciel89
Rating: Mature, for later chapters
Pairings and characters: Dean/Castiel, Gabriel, Sam (mostly only mentioned, sorry), appearances of other characters from the canon
Word count: ~17,800 in total (all 5 chapters)
Spoilers: None
Warnings: Angel-phobia, a bit of violence, m/m sexual content, wing!fic, wing!porn
Summary: Angels and humans live side-by-side, but not in harmony. Dean and Castiel were childhood friends, but their cultures tore them apart. Now, 18 years later, Cas returns to Lawrence, only to find that Dean doesn't remember him…
It took me some time to write it, but here is my first AU fic! It'll have 5 chapters and will be updated regularly. This is the first time I've ever written an AU, so please go easy on me.
This fic will be mostly from Castiel's POV, but sometimes it'll switch to Dean's, so be aware of that. Usually I write fics with Dean's POV, but I decided to make an exception. Can't just ignore poor Cas like that, can I XD
I hope you enjoy my fic, and I might even write a sequel to it if you like it :) I have a few ideas for a sequel.
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Castiel returned home from a long day of work, and immediately made his way to the couch to throw himself on it. He had barely even managed to lock the door before he collapsed on the couch.
He worked at a big distribution warehouse where he helped putting the goods on the shelves to later be redistributed by retailers. It was mostly a boring job, and many of the things he carried were quite heavy, but he hadn't been able to find anything else. It was at times like these he cursed at his wings, which were strong and heavy on his back, and which made it so tough to carry heavy things around all day long.
He sighed and spread his wings out, letting them rest over the couch and the floor. The wings were black and sort of unkempt. It's hard to groom your wings when you cannot reach all your feathers.
It was already late when the doorbell to Castiel's apartment rang. He woke up from his short nap and groaned as he got up from the couch. He willed his wings out of sight and walked over to the door and opened it, only to face his brother Gabriel.
"Hey bro, long time, no see," Gabriel cheered at him.
Castiel glared at him. He had just come home from a long day's work, and only wanted to lie down on the couch to rest a bit longer, and now he was facing his brother who had the biggest grin on his face. Even though he loved his brother, Castiel didn't feel in the mood for hanging out with him right now. Besides, it had only been two days since they saw each other last time.
"What is it, Gabriel?"
"Ow, don't sound so annoyed," Gabriel said, pretending to be hurt. "You sit in here every day after work. How about we go out and spend some time together?"
"Go where?" Castiel said, frowning at his brother.
"You'll see," Gabriel said and practically dragged Castiel out of his apartment. Castiel barely had time to lock the door before Gabriel guided him away.
Ever since they moved back to Lawrence, Castiel and Gabriel had spent a lot of time together. Gabriel had moved out when Castiel was thirteen to get a career as a so-called 'angel warrior', meaning hunting down demons and other evil things. So he and Gabriel had some time and things to catch up on.
It had been eighteen years since Castiel had last been to this city. He was born and grew up here with Gabriel and their parents, in the outer part of Lawrence.
His family belonged to a another kind of angels – the ancestors of angels from Heaven, who had for some reason come down to Earth and settled there. The angels on Earth weren't quite as strong as the angels from Heaven, and were physically somewhat different (they didn't need a vessel, they had their own human forms, but still had wings and grace), but they remained the strongest beings on Earth, and had formed a society that now lived side-by-side with humanity. Though, the tension between angels and humans still existed, even today.
Shortly after Castiel's seventh birthday, his father had been offered a new job in Texas which he couldn't decline, so his family had been forced to move there. It had broken Castiel's heart that they had to leave, since like any other angel he was very attached to the place of his birth.
Now, eighteen years after having moved away, Castiel was back in Lawrence with his brother, Gabriel, who had wanted to come back as well.
It surprised Castiel that Gabriel wanted to return to their hometown as well, especially after he had just been promoted to the status of archangel by the leaders in the angel society. But Gabriel had insisted that he had enough of always doing what the leaders wanted him to do, and wanted to lay low for a while and enjoy life. Castiel couldn't blame him.
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Gabriel took him to a small café in the outer part of town. It was small, yes, but it seemed cosy and quiet, and Castiel kind of liked the place.
When they first entered the café, Castiel was met by the smell of food and coffee. Castiel wrinkled his nose; he wasn't so used to the smell of cafés, and the coffee smell was kind of strong. He figured he'd get used to it after a few minutes so he shrugged it off.
There were two people behind the counter, a man and a woman, Castiel noticed. They both nodded their heads at them and smiled as a greeting when they entered the café, and he and Gabriel nodded back. And that was when Castiel looked into the bright, green eyes of the waiter behind the counter and froze.
The man behind the counter… Castiel knew him.
It was Dean. Dean Winchester.
It couldn't be.
But there was no mistaking it. He was older now, but Castiel still recognized his eyes when the man looked up at him. And his soul – one of the brightest souls Castiel had ever seen.
Castiel must have stood there for a while, staring wide-eyed and with open mouth at Dean, because suddenly he felt Gabriel grab his arm and drag him away. "Cas, are you okay?" he heard his brother ask.
"Uh…"
"I'll take that as a yes. Stop standing there like an idiot and come over here," Gabriel said, sounding almost amused, before he dragged Castiel over to an available table. The table was at the window row, almost right in front of the counter where the waiters were.
They sat down opposite each other, and it took Castiel some effort to look away from Dean. Finally he forced himself to look away from the man and faced Gabriel.
"Someone you know?" Gabriel asked with a smirk.
"Um…" Castiel was cut off when someone came to take their orders.
"What can I get you guys?"
Castiel flinched when he noticed that it was Dean. He glanced up at the man, but Dean showed no signs of recognition; he only smiled friendly at them.
It made something inside Castiel break and he looked into his lap. Of course Dean wouldn't recognize him. It had been eighteen years, and Dean was only a human; humans didn't recognize others the way angels did – by sensing grace or souls.
"Well, I think I'm taking a bacon-cheese burger with fries and a beer," Gabriel said, smiling up at Dean. "Dunno about my bro. Cas!" he said, snapping Castiel out of his thoughts and making him look at him. "Whatcha want?"
"Uh," Castiel said, taking a minute to realise what Gabriel meant. "Oh, err, just the same as him," he said, trying to smile up at Dean but pretty much failed. Gabriel snorted from across him, but Castiel ignored him.
"Okay then," Dean smiled, staring into Castiel's eyes for a moment before leaving to get their orders.
Castiel made himself stop following Dean with his eyes and tried to focus on Gabriel again. When he looked at his brother, he was smirking at him.
"Dude, gay love between you two?" Gabriel teased.
"Shut up, Gabriel," Castiel muttered and blushed, making his brother roar with laughter.
When Dean returned a few minutes later with their food, Castiel forced himself not to look at him.
Dinner with Gabriel was pretty relaxing. They talked about their family, and how it went at their perspective jobs. Gabriel was working as a janitor at the University of Kansas. Though Gabriel said he repaired and took care of a lot of stuff every day, Castiel knew his brother was probably also doing a few other things there which weren't so respectable – such at pulling pranks on poor, unsuspecting people – but he decided not to mention it.
When they were done eating Gabriel asked for the check and they both paid for the respective meals. They got up and Gabriel put his arm around Castiel's shoulder while telling him some joke as they walked towards the exit.
Castiel smiled at his brother's ridiculous joke and shivered slightly when he felt Dean's gaze on him as they left the café.
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It was almost a week ago that Gabriel had dragged Castiel into that café where he had seen Dean again after so many years. But the fact that Dean didn't seem to recognize him had hurt, even though they hadn't exactly parted in the best of ways when they were kids. Castiel wasn't sure if he wanted to go back to the café again.
But another part of him desperately wanted to go back and see Dean again, and that part grew larger and larger every day.
It wasn't a big surprise to Castiel when he found himself walking into the café after work on a Wednesday night. There were two girls standing behind the counter, a blonde and a brunette, but Dean was nowhere in sight.
Castiel hesitated before he sat down by the counter. The brunette – Ruby, said her name tag – came over and Castiel ordered a coffee. He could need that right now after such a long day carrying around heavy stuff at the store. He might be stronger than humans, but that didn't make his job a luxury.
He looked around in the café. It wasn't very crowded, there were only five or six people in it right now, but Castiel didn't mind. He liked quiet places.
That was until he heard people arguing and turned to see Dean and some woman standing in the back of the café, having an argument.
"Seriously, why did you have an angel to come over and repair the damn pipes?" the woman shouted at Dean. "You know how I feel about them, Dean! How could you?"
"Rachel, honey, I told you; I forgot, okay?" Dean said. Castiel observed how Dean grabbed the woman's biceps to calm her down. "But seriously, if I hadn't called someone, the damn apartment would be flooded by now, and you'd be even more pissed! And angel or not, he repaired them, didn't he? Now, would you please stop shouting at me at my freaking workplace, there areguests here."
Dean's firm, annoyed voice made the woman calm down and take a look around at the people who were staring at them now. She snapped something at Dean before she stalked out of the café.
Castiel felt his heart drop.
Dean had a girlfriend. And she didn't like angels, it seemed. His invisible wings twitched nervously behind him at the realization.
Maybe Castiel made a mistake in coming back here after all.
He didn't even notice it when Dean walked over behind the counter to continue his work, and suddenly spoke to him.
"You here alone today?"
Castiel snapped out of his thoughts and saw Dean standing on the other side of the counter, leaning towards him and smiling. The smile alone made Castiel's grace jump inside of him.
"Um, yes, my brother is still at work," Castiel said, shifting.
"Ah," Dean said and leaned back somewhat. "Sorry about that earlier, hope it didn't bother you too much," he said and gestured at the place where he and his girlfriend had just fought.
"It's okay," Castiel said, attempting to smile.
"Good," Dean said, almost with relief. "So, what brings you here today, Cas?" Castiel looked up at him with a confused frown and Dean explained, "I heard your brother call you 'Cas' last time, so I figured that's your name."
"Oh," Castiel said. For a moment he thought about correcting him and tell him his name was actually 'Castiel', but then he remembered that Dean's girlfriend hadn't seem too pleased about angels. If Dean were to recognize him and start a friendship again, the girlfriend would most likely be angry and disapprove.
They been through this kind of thing before, end it had ended badly.
So Castiel decided Dean didn't have to know who he was. It would do more damage than good. So instead he just smiled at him and said, "Yes, yes it is."
Dean smiled at that. "I'm Dean, but I bet you already read that from the name tag," he grinned.
Castiel was about to say something when the blonde waitress came over.
"Dean, what are you standing there for? Hurry up and get that guy his— oh," she trailed off when she noticed Cas, and stared between the two, but mostly on Cas. "Someone you know?" she asked Dean.
"Maybe. What's it to you?" Dean teased.
"You're an ass. Just get that guy his coffee already," she said, gesturing at a man sitting in the far end of the café, before she turned around and walked into the kitchen in the back.
When she was gone, Dean turned to look at Castiel again and smiled. "That's Jo, never mind her. I should probably get back to work," he said and moved away from the counter.
"Yes, you should," Castiel smiled.
Dean stared at Cas' smile for a few moments, before snapping out of it and gave Cas a smile and went over to the other man with his coffee.
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Castiel decided not to go back to the café again. Dean had a life now, he had a girlfriend and a job, and if Castiel interfered, he would only destroy what Dean had built up. Besides, angels and humans were rarely ever friends, and when they were it often had complicated side-effects because their cultures were so different. Humans still looked at angels like they were lower than them, and looked down on those who had close relations to angels.
It was better to leave Dean alone and not drag him into this. Not again.
Castiel found himself lying on his stomach on the couch in his living room once again. He tossed around and sighed in frustration.
His grace was in pain. The same pain he'd felt eighteen years ago when he had lost his most precious friend. It was almost unbearable.
Seeing Dean again had made his grace jump with joy inside him; making him want to be with his long lost childhood friend and crush again, even if Dean didn't recognize him.
But Castiel knew he couldn't risk it.
Days passed, and the pain didn't get any better. Every day when he came home from work, he'd walk back and forth in his apartment, or just lie on the bed or couch; hoping the pain would go away soon.
But it didn't.
He didn't even feel like seeing Gabriel anymore. But his brother was persistent, and sometimes he managed to drag Castiel out his apartment and take him somewhere. He had asked Gabriel to go somewhere else with him instead of the café where Dean worked. His brother had looked at him in worry and asked what was wrong, but Castiel didn't answer him.
Gabriel had even asked if it was because Castiel was 'in love with the waiter' that he was too shy to go back. Castiel had denied it and told Gabriel that Dean already had a girlfriend, so it was not the reason.
Castiel was quite happy that his brother didn't seem to recognize Dean. It wasn't like Dean and Gabriel had met often when they were kids – only on a few occasions, and it was not long enough that Gabriel would have a reason to remember his soul. And if he did, he didn't show it.
Weeks had passed since Castiel last saw Dean, and it was on a Friday night that Gabriel found Castiel on the couch again, and then decided to drag him back to the café where Dean worked.
"Gabriel! I told you I don't want to go back here," Castiel snapped as he found himself outside the café with his brother.
"Aw, c'mon, just because you have a crush on the waiter – who has a girlfriend – doesn't mean you have to stay away from here forever, or lie around miserably on your couch all day," Gabriel said; still trying to push Castiel inside. "I don't remember teaching my bro to be a coward. Besides, I like this place, so get your butt inside."
"I'm not a coward, Gabriel, and nor do I have a crush on Dean," Castiel said stubbornly; still struggling with his brother who was determined to push him inside the café. But fighting an archangel was pretty much useless.
"Yeah, whatever, bro," Gabriel said and finally pushed Castiel inside.
As soon as they were inside, Castiel stopped struggling and stood straight as people stared at him. His entrance had been rather awkward, after all. He flushed and followed Gabriel over to their usual seats and sat down.
Castiel hadn't seen Dean around when they had entered, but that didn't mean the human wasn't here. He prayed he wasn't. He couldn't stand to look at Dean and know that he couldn't have any kind of relationship with him – Dean was forbidden territory for Castiel.
"C'mon, bro," Gabriel said, snapping Castiel out of his thoughts. "You can't possibly be that scared that the man is here." Castiel didn't answer and just looked away. Gabriel leaned closer and smirked. "Have you even told the guy that you're angel? You haven't, have you?"
Castiel immediately turned to look at his brother. "No, and you mustn't tell him, Gabriel!"
"Whoa, easy, calm down bro," Gabriel grinned, throwing his hands up in defence and leant back. "I was just asking."
Their conversation ended when Dean came over to take their orders. Castiel had almost forgotten that the tables in this area seemed to be 'Dean's tables', and of course Dean would be the one to take their orders.
"Hey guys, what can I get you this time?" Dean asked, smiling as he looked between them, but mostly he was looking at Castiel.
Castiel felt his grace jump inside him again as Dean's green eyes landed on him, but he tried to ignore it.
"For me, the same as usual, and the same goes for my bro I think," Gabriel said, looking over at Castiel who only managed to nod.
"Alright then," Dean smiled, his eyes meeting Castiel's for a split second before he left.
Dinner was the usual; they talked about what had happened since last time they met, and Gabriel said that their older brother, Michael, had just gotten a promotion within the angel army as a Sergeant Major. He had been an archangel for quite a few years now, so it wasn't a surprise that he kept getting promoted at his job. He had always taken his job at the military very seriously.
Castiel had no intention of trying to become an archangel. A job within the army or anything like that didn't interest him, and he was satisfied with the powers he already had.
Everyone in his family had gone for high educated jobs or ranks, and his father hadn't been very impressed when Castiel had said he didn't want to follow the example. Gabriel had been the only one to support his decision, which he was quite grateful for.
Angels usually got jobs within the military because they were good at the jobs, and their powers made them better soldiers than humans. Besides, it was pretty much the only job that was 'acceptable' for an angel.
"Man, I like this place – best burgers ever!" Gabriel said when they were done eating. He leaned back in his seat and patted his stomach in satisfaction. He looked somewhere behind Castiel and suddenly his expression changed and he stood up.
"I need the bathroom, might take a while, just wait here, will ya?"
Gabriel gave Castiel a wink, and before he could say anything, Gabriel was gone. He wondered what had gotten into his weird brother, when suddenly he sensed someone's presence. He looked up and saw Dean.
"Hi there," said Dean, sitting down in the seat opposite Cas that Gabriel had occupied earlier. "Do you mind if I sit here for a bit?" he asked, uncertainly.
Castiel's eyes widened in surprise before he stammered, "Uh, no, not at all."
Dean's eyes lit up, but only for a second and then it was gone again.
"So, um, I haven't seen you around for a few weeks. Everything ok?"
Castiel was taken a little aback by the question and shifted in his seat. "Everything's fine, it's just… it's complicated."
"Yeah, tell me about it," Dean muttered and looked down at the table, and somehow Castiel knew he was referring to his girlfriend, whom he had argued with a few weeks earlier.
Dean snapped out of his thoughts and Castiel watched as his face almost lit up. "You know, we do offer the world's best pie on Wednesdays. You should come by some time and try it out; you won't regret it."
For a moment, Castiel wanted to say no thanks, but Dean was looking at him so hopefully, that he eventually found himself nodding and saying, "I would like that."
"Awesome," Dean grinned. "See ya around, Cas," he said, before getting up and went back to work before Jo yelled at him again.
Castiel feared that Dean had recognized him after all, since he kept talking to him and smiling at him. But he didn't sense any proper sign of recognition in his soul, so Castiel was sure that Dean remained oblivious of who he was. Probably, Dean's soul recognized Castiel's grace from their childhood years; making Dean feel comfortable in his presence, and that was why Dean was trying to talk to him and get to know him better.
The situation was getting more and more dangerous…
To be continued…
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The second chapter will be up very soon, as I already wrote it. But I won't post the chapters on the same days, sorry.
Hoped you liked it so far, chapter 2 should be a little more interesting. Please review and let me know what you think :)