Christmas was the worst season for the CCG.

(Mainly because they're corrupt and ran by ghouls, but the public don't need to know that.)

To start off with, the amount of Christmas decoration that went up in the offices was almost dangerous, as everyone decided that tinsel, paper chains and decorated trees were a great idea to put up around the arguably most trigger-happy humans in Japan, who are all grumping over the weather, the amount of paperwork left for them to do and about the possible raid that was coming up.

(The main reason as to why the biggest raids happened during the winter was to make sure that people didn't get too festive, but again, there was no need for people to know that titbit of information.)

There was mistletoe is every possible door way, meaning that everything was slow since nobody wanted to be caught under it, and if an unlucky pair were, well, it took at least ten minutes for the deed to be done. People just had to have a real tree too, but not a single one of the humans either had the time or the number of fucks needed (which was about a 3) to give to properly take care of them, leaving Sasaki to run around all 23 office blocks to make sure all the trees were fed and watered, often bringing along majority of his squad and occasionally Mado, Juuzou, or even Arima on one occasion.

Every year someone somehow starts a fight with the fairy lights, with one year a delivery boy not only managed to start three separate fires on three separate occasions but major power cut in the entire building during the third fire, losing major reports on some of the 20th ward ghouls, one of Arima's favourite books (there's a rumour that that's the reason why the kid went missing during the raid) and the desk that the lights were on (as well as the browsing history, so there was a silver lining...).

(It's a wonder how the kid managed to get employed in the first place.)

(There was now a rule to not employ college kids.)

People, despite what the CCG told them during Halloween, still thought it was a great idea to put up candles (which still goes against their heath and safety regulations!) and sing loudly and badly while in the offices, yet they moan about the amount of paperwork they had left and the fact they had to work over Christmas (it wasn't like ghouls were going to be taking a break, they still had to hunt!). Most of them decided that it would be best to try and book the Christmas off, to the point that they had to book the day off in January to make sure that they had the day off, and by Easter time they could not accept anymore requests due to how thinly they would have to spread their resources otherwise.

(It was bad enough with the fact that people just didn't want to join the CCG anymore unless they wanted vengeance against ghouls or they were brought up to hate them with a burning passion, and even then, the humans were too lazy to do anything about it, preferring to celebrate a holiday than killing off a threat to their kind)

(Honestly, humans these days. And they wonder why they're the ones hunted instead of being on the top of the food chain. At this point, they're basically asking to be eaten.)

That didn't even begin to cover the amount of Christmas parties or 'Secret Santa's' there were, distracting people from their work and fuelling the gossip wheel of the CCG, neither of which were very good. Did it really matter what Mado got Amon that made him blush so hard that the college kid tripped over the fairy lights and started a fight in his laughter? Was being invited to Sasaki's Christmas party that much of a privilege?

It was like trying to control school children in the playground after letting them have five candy canes each.

(In all honesty, the kids didn't get paid a decent wage to act like that.)

(You could probably get away with killing a few of them too.)


A.N. When suffering with writer's block, write that one oneshot you planned last year but never go round to so you had to wait a year for it to be relevant again. Merry Christmas.