Paradise Event
Day 1: Surprise!
Pixel City, 1997 Christmas Eve; a day so full of lies and materialism that it's enough to make the Statue of Liberty cry blood. A day that would normally be utterly cheesy and boring as hell if it weren't for the special incoming events. This Christmas everyone will be burning up from pure happiness, so much that they would remember such a day if it weren't for the fact that they'll all die painfully. This year, the 'x' in 'X-mas' stands for Death, have a happy one full of warmth, ashes and unspecified gooey substance.
Initiate Surprise
An old rusted taxi drives dangerously and kills a hobo before pulling over near Canary-Energy Hall, almost losing a tire; tonight they welcome an opera singer who's going to be burned at the stake, one more opportunity to prove how Christmas is pure evil. The yellow car remains there but nothing happens, normally the valet would step over and open the door but he's been frozen on place hours ago having succumbed to harsh cold. Thus the woman inside pushed her own door open anyway, it's not like she didn't know how to do that already. Stepping out she stands there to admire the nice building; she never really cared for architectures but oddly decides that it's a good time to start doing so. Meanwhile, her so-called date looks at her from inside the car, his face too close from the glass, still waiting for the valet to give him a hand.
The woman shoves a five dollar bill in the valet's pocket; poor guy's going to need it to buy himself a hot coffee later, if he somehow resurrects until then. The date eventually figures out that he'll have to produce effort by himself in order to exit the car, which is a pain because according to him rich people shouldn't have to generate the slightest effort in anything. Anyway it was about time since the taxi driver had been looking at him strangely for the past two minutes…. now including leveling up a big knife coated with something brown.
The blond man stepped towards the woman, looking at her he sees that she just stands there appearing not even to blink, he gets confused, «What's wrong?...Are your eyes frozen? » She doesn't answer still so he continues, «You're the one who wanted to go to the opera so you better not make a fuss over this. Especially since I got us free tickets—I didn't say that. If you do complain, I just might….», a tear formed at the corner of his eye which froze in place leaving his left lid stuck shut.
She still looked straight ahead and said monotonously «My name's Aya Brea, 25, NYPD Officer and damn good at it. »
«…..what? »
«….I dunno….I just…..air bubbles clogged my synapses for a second. Well I guess I better try to have some fun, or at least fake it so as not to hurt your feelings. »
«…. »
«Sorry, guess I shouldn't have said that out loud. At the same time I didn't expect you were listening because it occurred to me during the drive to here that you lacked a functional brain due to saliva dripping from your mouth and your vacant stare. »
«…Erm, anyway, lighten up, we're gonna have a good time! You'll see! »
Oh he was so right.
Brea nodded for different reasons, «Let's go, the sooner we get in the faster we'll be out, so I can cleverly never see you again. » she started walking, leaving her unwanted-date behind.
He'd better hurry if he wants to live, December is so harsh.
They marched on the red carpet leading to their seats, the act was actually starting, must have spent too much time outside zoning out. Luckily they didn't die from cold else they would have missed the great show that was about to commence. If Aya knew how excellent it would be I'm certain she would have brought sticks and sausages to grill. Next they sat down and she eyed the huge chandelier standing over the stage, thinking that if that thing dropped it would kill all the actors and destroy the floor along with it; right now it shun with force as if powered by the Sun so much it was bright.
It was a miracle nothing had caught on fire.
Aya yawned thinking, if I make it out of here alive, I'm going to need some sort of emergency kit to reinvigorate my spirit, so it was decided that when she'd arrive at her place she'd order an extra-large pizza. She finally paid attention to the stage, there were four actors and one of them was a tall figure wearing a red dress.
The one playing the guard clearly had it rough as for he didn't have to learn any script, poor man; the other two started saying theirs but Aya didn't listen. Instead she stared at the statue in the back; it was far more interesting than anything else at the time. Then suddenly the woman dressed in red moved, Brea was surprised as for she thought it merely had been an object so far. Then she wondered if the woman would pass out soon because there was no way the actress could breathe in that goddamn corset, even if her breasts clearly could.
The actress started singing and the cop thought, alright she's good I'll give her that, although I think I'm feeling some unknown liquid starting to run down from my ears. Everyone was in awe and someone threw pop-corn towards the stage; then the singer stared the cop's way, directly in her eyes. Aya wondered why the 'noise' kept coming out of the singer's closed mouth as the two women blinked in synchronicity, the actress smiling at her because her little secret was so damn good.
Brea might have felt like pointing out how weird that was, until something weirder occurred; the singer looked back at her colleagues and set them aflame just like that. The guard, who had done and said nothing so far, kept doing just that as the other men burned screaming in horror. Great job.
The Prince stumbled off the stage thus allowing the fire to spread into the crowd, hence inventing a new way to share the story with the clients. People did what they do best, which is usually nothing worthwhile; they started to scream and panic, running in all directions while stepping on each others. Seriously, there really was no reason to be that terrified; ordinary people are always overreacting. Still on stage, the guard finally caught on fire and grabbed the left-side curtain in a most awkward manner before succumbing to scorching fire. I guess he told himself that if he was to go down, so would the curtains; now that's just wicked.
On the second floor ground some people were still watching because they thought that all the stench of burning flesh and people puking was part of the act. Meanwhile the actress stood in the middle of the stage looking quite pleased, colored spot lights clamoring her. Aya looked around thinking that maybe things had gone too far. But clearly not enough still as she merely watched the man at her immediate left while he wondered in horror why his hand hurt so fucking much, before catching on fire himself.
The woman seated next to him though didn't seem to realize something was wrong until she also shared his exciting fate. The humans that weren't burning ran towards the exit while some people jumped from the terrace above; I don't see how that would help. A valet was seen trying to direct the masses towards the exit, too bad he's going to burn alive; this job is so cruel. Aya, who was still just sitting there because she enjoys a warm fire, managed to avoid a man falling from above by rolling on top of the seats in front of her. Somehow, her date was nowhere to be found near her at that time.
During that beautiful pandemonium, the actress leveled her arms above her head in satisfaction as everything burned around her; now that's a high-quality show! Everyone was now dead, the theater filled with the sweet stench of burnt humans and pungent regurgitated meals; Merry Fucking Christmas. The blond man got up from the floor, looking around frantically. «BABEH JESSUS! I… don't wanna pee my pants! OH MY GAWD! I just DID! » he looked terrified as dribble flew from his mouth.
The cop woman already had her handgun aimed at the actress, more or less; she itched to point it to her right though….but mustn't. Still staring ahead towards the stage she said «Unless you want to die I suggest you get out of here. NOW! » she abruptly bumped into him with her right side; making him hit his head on the nearby seat before being knocked on the ground. It makes no difference since he doesn't have a brain to damage. The woman made her way around the chairs and into the isle, now that's more like it, alright let's see if she can explain what the hell, hah pun, just happened.
Making her way towards the stage among bits and pieces of human-leftovers, she adjusted her equipment accordingly, threw away unwanted junk unto the nearby cadavers before choosing the proper gear from her previous Ex Game…..we authors love to break the fourth wall. Armed properly with her deadly gun and incomparable protective vest, she got up the stairs and fell because of her damn high-heels (or high-Hell), unglued her face from the sullied floor then went onto the stage.
The actress stared at her, «Take your time…»
Aya eyed her, «…You're hovering….above the floor. »
«Yes indeed, that is what hovering implies. »
«You made quite a mess, explain yourself! Oh and, freeze! »
«I call it art. If I freeze I won't be able to hover anymore which will upset me. You don't want that. »
«How do you manage to be singing right now while talking….? »
«After everything you've witnessed, that's your question? I've got a couple of my own, like why in nucleus' fuck weren't you part of the fireworks? »
«You tell me. »
«I indeed will. » she cleared her throat and said with a more cryptic voice, «You will be awakening soon…. »
«…Mhk, what else? »
«Listen…. you cells are trying to communicate. », she lifted her arm over her head, «They're calling out…. » she remained that way.
Aya blinked, «…What are you doing? »
«Initiating Battle Mode. », on that a cool song was heard and the actress started to show her powers.
The cop dodged, «That is some serious attack on an officer of the law, now it's my turn! » she fired at the woman's face but it only made her laugh. «This extremely powerful gun should have obliterated your head. How did you survive that…? », suddenly Brea stopped aiming, «What's happening! My body…..it's getting hot….! Hotter than usual I mean. » then some magic orange crystals surrounded her with a magical sound, «Shit I hope I'm not turning into ''Sailor Moon'' or some crap like that else I'm definitely gonna shoot myself right here…. »
«Just as I thought; we're not stereotyped women, you're meant to be bad ass just like I. Although, technically I can't be called a human anymore…. »
«What is this? What did you DO TO ME?! »
«Damn, at least wait until I really do something before panicking. Our bodies are communicating with each other…. Oh and by the way, I am a bad ass; you should have guessed that already. »
«Communicating what exactly? The hell do you want? Is it because I didn't pay attention when you sang? »
«You just got some awesome super powers, the least you could do is appreciate them. And the more you're going to use them, the more you'll become like me…..SO BAD ASS! »
«…Okay I admit, I always wanted to be like spider-man and superman….., but who are you…? »
«Not that it won't be some cliché…..I'm Eve. »
«…The Eve…? The one in that shitty science fiction book they call The Bible? »
«…By no means, no. I'm just simply bad- »
«OK fuck sake, I get it! »
«In fact no, that's the problem, you don't get it. I'm surprised you don't know me, Ava…..»
«It's 'Aya'. »
«That's what I said. You should know me well… »
«…Well, in case I sound stupid or redundant…what? »
Next a very bright flashback occurs, so much the two needed to put sunglasses on but players actually bled. The very painful flashback included a little girl freezing on a hospital bed with some invisible dude playing a creepy tune on an invisible piano. The girl seemed to be unable to blink, which went well with the ominous background vibe. There was also a PS3 near to the oxygen tank but sadly the girl couldn't play because she is stuck in a shitty flashback; now that is extremely cruel.
I just had an emotion because of that. End of torturous white screen.
Aya robbed her eyes, severely poking herself with her gun consequently making it bleed. «What was that…? »
«You just stabbed yourself in the eye with your handgun, frankly that was quite unprofessional and stupid. »
«No, I mean the poor little girl freezing to death in that room. »
«….Whatever the fuck-cell-organelle do you mean? »
«….whut?...That girl! The hallucination you just showed me. » Eve simply grinned so Aya shouted «You know what I mean! »
«Hahaha…. » on that Eve just flew to her right, straight into the fake column that broke in half consequently fell on the stage; not so bad ass, then she was gone.
«…..That was dumb too! Shit…..if only I could hover as well. And how the hell am I supposed to know what kind of power I've got? Where do I see that, how?! », she grabbed her stupid shoes and threw them away at the statue, «Fuck it I'll just go barefoot, the cold filthy and possibly-bacteria-filled floor can't be worse than what those malevolent apparatus are making me go through; why the fuck some women put up with this shit? »
The cop followed Eve backstage and soon realized that no matter which side of the burnt curtains she went behind, she'd still end up at the same spot. «….weirdest thing that happened tonight…. »
She now faced a big hole in the ground, looking down she felt a draft of decaying tissue, «That evil-yet-awesome actress is down there, I can smell her. » then with her unparalleled sense of hearing she was able to caught on some tires screeching on the asphalt outside, «Sounds like my backup's arrived, they missed all the fun. They better have brought something to eat; if it's for food, Eve can certainly wait. »
Before leaving she saw a box nearby and decided to look through it, she found a small plastic bottle labeled 'medicine 1'. «Who wasted so big a box for so small an item, and what the hell am I supposed to do with this, sniff it? » She threw the bottle away, «Not like I'm going to need it, my vest has more than the required strength to protect me, it's so superbly evil I barely need to level up and will beat this third Ex round in less than two hours. »
Making her way back along the isle she stumbled upon a wallet, searching through it she picked up the fifty dollars before discarding the object. In the hall there were two red corpses, she stared at them briefly wondering what human tastes like; now was the perfect time to find out since they were all cooked but Aya didn't particularly want to come out with her mouth and fingers all suspicious. So it was a completely unfazed woman that walked on crispy fingers and out the building.
When she exited two policemen opened fire at her, she would have required that ambulance if not for her outstanding protective gear. «Thanks guys, nice to see your judgment has improved…. »
«Shite, sorry Bread. It's just that we're so on edge, didn't want to catch fire y'know? »
«It's 'Brea', and yes I-» she got shot again, «Seriously?! »
«Crap my finger was still on the trigger! Please don't kill me! »
«Wha-?... », she sighed, «It'd help if you stopped aiming at me so I can actually make a move. »
«No prob. »
«Yeh, we're pros….where's the safety switch already….? »
She ignored that and walked towards the paramedic, he looked at her wide-eyed asking «I wonder if it's that thing called…um…..spoon…..spoontaneous combusted? »
«It's 'spontaneous combustion', and no sadly it wasn't. Science weeps. »
«…pretty sure it's spoontaneous combusted though…. »
«Stop being so unscientific and move away from me, I don't need your useless assistance; why don't you help that poor valet instead, it may be quite unclear to the untrained eye but he's in mortal danger of hypothermia. » she turned towards the two officers. «Well why are you standing there for, aren't you supposed to be backup? »
The first cop answered «Huh? Hell nah, we were just called here but no way I'm gettin' in there! I fear for my body hair. »
They stared and she said «Fantastic, you'll have a brilliant career…. »
« I think so too! »
«…..as an imbecile. »
«….errr…. ya think we'll be on TV? I just laundered my suit yesterday. » He awkwardly rubbed his chest. « Speaking of clothes, why you wearin' a dress? I thought you said that if you wore women's clothes your flesh would melt off and your soul be taken by Satan. »
«Pretty sure it happened tonight. »
The second cop, who had been staring at the paramedic poking the valet suspiciously, suddenly flared back to life, «Hey, why don't you have any injuries? »
Brea ignored that, «Plenty of people suffered hell itself before dying but I don't care. Probably could have made it if only the paramedic wasn't busy being inept.»
«You're barefoot by the way. »
She frowned «Thanks, I hadn't notice from the cold and all. »
«Hey I've got the same gun! Got bullets for that if ya want. »
Aya sighed «First, you need glasses because we really don't have the same gun; that or a functional brain. Second, my special firearm can hold up to 127 ammunitions plus I've already got a crate filled with 999 bullets at the precinct. Lastly, why do you keep talking like a retard…? Plus am I to understand none of you morons brought any food? »
«…..err….. »
She thinned her eyes, «….you'll pay for that…. », before stepping back inside Canary-Energy Hall. While running back towards the hole she kept cursing to herself how she was surrounded by idiots, then looked down the black opening, «I hope I won't break a leg….because that would possibly hurt, I think. » she jumped in and landed on someone. «Why are you in the way?! », she realized it was a little girl, and that she might have killed the kid if not for her being wraithlike. «Hold on, you're that girl from the excruciating flashback, how did you get here? But more importantly, where's the PS3? …Don't tell me you left it behind all by itself? What's wrong with you?! »
The transparent form giggled before running away, vanishing just like that. Aya stood there staring, «….damn brat, will probably die if she keeps wandering here…..not that it matters. Strange though…her pale sick face and dark eyes not blinking reminded me of someone….. well I hope I don't run into her again. Now I've got to find this pyromaniac woman, all I have to do is follow the mouth-watering scent of burnt flesh. »
She investigated the hallway but most doors were locked, however on the last one she tried, a muffled voice came from beyond, «Can't you see that it's locked?! Go away! I'm rehearsing! »
«NYPD police, open up! »
«I wouldn't even open if you were FBI! »
«Oh perhaps I should mention that everyone is dead? »
«Tsh, right….. go rehearse somewhere else! »
«Fine, die. » she turned around in time to see a cute little rat running her way, «Aww, I'm glad you didn't burn little one, go on and escape while you still can. I have your back. »
The rodent abruptly stopped now looking in pain, it also growled like a dinosaur. Aya blinked, «…was that your stomach…? »
Then the rat started to grow bigger as its organism shifted in many ways; skin was torn showing bones and tendons, fangs grew much longer, its tail split in three plus a strange liquid covered the floor.
«Is that, caramel…? »
It shrieked at her, its huge jaws opened and shaking its strange tail, a nice song was also triggered then. The unfazed spectator aimed at it, «Calm down, I'll give you some biscuits, just don't eat my arm. ». It shot three fireballs from its tail, she merely stood there as it did no damage, «Okay looks like we're about to have some fun together. »
The woman fired once and the rat exploded all over the corridor. Removing tissues from her face, she looked around at the remains, «Shame, I always wanted a pet… did Eve do that to that poor rodent? I mean, human is fine but cruelty towards animals? Now she'll pay…», then she patted her vest, «Good job by the way, Void. » and kept on investigating. Where in X-Mas' fuck the cop was able to conceal all her gear is no mystery at all.
She finally was able to enter one of the rooms, «Hello, are you dead? » There were two immobile bodies on the floor, Brea walked passed them to examine the lockers which all made a horrible noise when being opened, «Damn, maintenance have been slacking. »
A noise came from behind, it would seem that one of the corpses wasn't fully dead yet, «Uh…urgh….»
«Damn you survived that?! Too bad you probably won't live to tell how tough you are. And your gender is hard to tell seeing that you're so burnt and disfigured…. »
«….come….closer…..»
«…You want some peanuts? That's a very weird request…. » Aya obviously was faking since she's got super hearing skills as demonstrated earlier.
The person coughed and it seemed to hurt a lot, «….CLOSER….! », he/she had a violent spasm.
«It's not like you'll do something if I don't….but. » Brea went nearer, «I'd call the paramedic but he isn't going to be of any help so you'll have to suffer until you die, for real this time. Also, I was wondering if you have any food in here. »
«…you're….inhumane…. »
«Not at all, my name's Aya Br-»
«M-Melissa…. »
«…Are you deaf? »
«…you're a monster, just like her…. »
«I don't think you're in a position to start a fight so if I were you I wouldn't go there. »
«….it hurts….horribly….. »
«I wasn't born with skills to sympathize, so you don't have to fake it. I could always tell you not to talk only to ask you another question right after, like in the game, but that would be too dumb. So instead I am going to just leave you here because I don't need whatever ''hints'' you think you can provide on this whole situation. »
The victim twitched, «She probably got to Suzanne too….you have to stop her…..»
«Stop Suzanne? But you just said she's dead, and in fact I think that's her dead body right there behind me. »
«...fuck, you... »The person wheezed, some liquid came out of the deformed mouth, then sighed way too long for someone who was dying, then died. Aya searched the cadaver in hopes to find roasted peanuts or something, but this person had really been of no help at all. «Some acting that was. », she straightened and kept searching the lockers. Aside from shitty outfits and a baseball bat with dried blood on it, she found nothing of interest. Brea harshly shut the locker door which bounced back open before being torn off its hinges, «Damn it! Is it too much to ask to find one goddamn bag of chips in this hell?! »
The woman entered another room and aimed at the monster that had been seating, the man dressed like a clown stood up scared shitless, «AHHHH! Don't shoot! » then he threw his wig plus fake nose her way, «Here take everything! I swear they're not mine; I just found them there on the counter and decided to wear the costume! », he started to remove it with anxiety, «It has nothing to do with some weird fetish or anything! »
«Alright calm down Kefka! And put those buffoon pants back on, you made me nervous enough as it is. »
He appeared hesitant, «Youuu, sure you don't want me to strip? »
«Unnecessary. »
«K, your loss. »
Still she didn't lower her handgun, just in case he abruptly wants to chew on her face; we never know with these lunatics…. «I'm a police officer. Perhaps I should have said that first.»
«You're the one who scared me! I was just getting ready to steal all this stuff because I thought everyone was busy on stage. », then remembering he's talking to a cop, «Shit. »
«You mean you didn't hear people scream in pain nor noticed the strange aroma floating in the air? »
«You know, only STAFF are allowed in here…. »
«…K?...»
«At least I'm aware I'm not one of them. »
«…Didn't you hear what I said…? Unless you want to burn alive atrociously before having you body gnawed at by evil mutated rats, I advise you evacuate; still, merely a suggestion….»
«You must be pulling my leg. »
«No. »
«You're KIDDING? »
«I really am not. »
«You're fucking with me….. »
«…»
«Awright, subtleties aside…., anyway I didn't plan on dying here tonight, so I'm going now even if this room is probably the safest place so far since I haven't died yet. » he ran passed her, «Call me… ;) »
She did consider it, he seemed nice, minus the act of thievery, but she always have had a soft spot for—an atrocious scream came from the corridor followed by some clownish giggles, then some more screaming which ended abruptly. Aya ran back outside and found his corpse at the end of the hallway; only the ginger wig was left intact in a corner where it looked suspicious. She laid one knee beside him but the pixels made it seem as though she touched his butt doing so. The fiery fumes stung her nose, he looked sad, and it wasn't just because of the ludicrous makeup. Something in his face implied regret…..like someone who indeed should have stayed where he'd been.
«Oh well. »
The heartless officer straightened and ran back to the remaining doors, when she entered she saw a corpse sprawled over a desk. «Excuse me-» the body fell backward, «…Sorry to interrupt but, are you dead? », Aya stared at it, then fumbled around in the crispy flesh, «I hope you don't mind me touching your burnt skin, it's for my investigation. », she got the theater's cremated key. «Hmm….we might have a killer here who locked the others in the nearby rooms….. or I just might be building some pretty stupid theory…»The woman spotted a telephone and thought it might be a good idea to notify the department about all this mess, if only she remembered what to dial…. «Dammit, those three numbers are always so hard to remember….! Fuck it, BakeHer doesn't need to know, doubt he'd understand anyway. »
The Chief of the NYPD was only good at one thing, and it was not his job.
She walked to the back of the room and found another box with nothing inside but some useless medicine; Brea looked to her left at the outfits and got the idea to change this uncomfortable dress for something else. She tossed some hangers aside but a parrot flew out repeating «They forced me! They made me ingest the key! », the bird then oddly just kept 'flying' on the same spot. Aya looked at it weird and ran off hurriedly; maybe it just wanted to be left alone in order to eat its owner. Better him than her.
Aya unlocked the first door to her right finding herself in a stylish room, «This must be the main lead's room. », she explored the closet, «…Doesn't explain why she's got ammo in her purse….along with kerosene in the back…. » Aya started sneezing; she spotted the flowers and started emptying her whole 127 bullets into it until nothing was left, «Allergies. » she then noticed some kind of book on the desk. «Might as well take my time reading this while potential survivors are awaiting my help. »
''November 3/ Mon / (Ugh, I always HATED having to fully write the day, takes such a long time I can't stand it.)
The Christmas show is set, makes me upset though. This has been my unsatisfied dream for so long that I don't care about it anymore but I need the cash so I'll do it. After that I can buy myself that HD TV to play games. That's my new dream! While I waste energy on this useless diary, the main actress has a solo concert at the theater in Non-Central Park. I hope it rains dead animals that day. I took shitload of medications to get here. I ABSOLUTELY FUCKING HAVE to get the lead part; else people will BURN. I need that money so bad I'll even sell my soul to Samael if I have to! Heard he's nice.''
Aya glanced around, unsure, before turning the page.
''November 17 / Mon/
The cast was announced, Suzanne and I are double cast. I mean, why was she picked she's deaf-mute….? ''
Suddenly someone started playing the piano, the nosy reader looked around but couldn't pinpoint where the creepy tune came from. So she just resumed her reading.
''I want to play the part alone but everyone knows I can't sing for shit…..doesn't mean I have to stop breaking their balls though.
November 21 / Fri /
Some people say I'm overdoing it, they know I can't sing. Point is Suzanne can't either but somehow they seem to like her more…. probably because she dyes her hair blonde. My body is getting hotter than ever for some fucked up reason. At first I thought it was because I abused spicy food too much but that's not it. I better take more medicine….if only I could recall where I hid them.
December 6 / Sat /
I collapsed today. I wonder if it has to do with me taking too much medicine and falling down the stairs. One of my teeth seemed to have gone through my upper lip and I bled a lot, but, I don't care if I die from this extremely huge wound. I just want to get through this show so I can get paid. I swear once I get that long-awaited TV, I'm going to take it out for dinner.
December 10 / Wed /
Crap, I somehow ran straight into a wall and passed out again…they told me to seek psychiatric help but they don't know what the hell they're talking about. Just because I see dead giraffes wanting to share cheeseburgers with me doesn't mean I'm mentally unstable. If I keep stumbling into walls Suzanne will definitely take my part. She's always been so good at what she can't do; so compared to me who actually can do it, that says a lot.
I better take way more medication tonight; maybe I'll pour an entire bottle into the blender along with yogurt and cigarettes.
December 11/ Th/
Suzanne was burned in an apartment fire. I was told she'd been practicing the play while cooking bacon, when suddenly the meal backfired. That's why I'm vegetarian. Well I can't say that she had it coming considering I wanted the part so bad; but I can at least write it.
She asked for it, no one messes around with my DREAM of having a TV! Hers were NOTHING compared to mine. Besides, her sick baby brother did ask to have cancer when SHE tested me.
December 17/ Wed/
Well it looks like I'll be the lead, unless someone who's actually competent barges in here suddenly. I'd better take more medication and work work WORK IT!...that seemed insane, though. But no one will know…..
December 23/ Tu/
Opening night. Everything went smoothly. I'm this close from my egotistical dream, I can taste it; tastes like plastic, fiber wire, electronic parts, lead and LED.
Tomorrow is Christmas Eve and we should have the biggest crowd in the season; oh HOW they're all going to BURN of excitement! Plus the solo concert next day at the park is also mine. But I'm not feeling too well…perhaps it has to do with the fact that I've taken my year-due medications in two months only. But that is just stupid thinking, I obviously haven't been taking enough; so I'd better take some more medication! It's the only logical action possible! TONIGHT IS PARTY NIGHT!''
The piano stopped, Aya removed her hand from the last page as if in a trance, then she realized her eyes burned so much from lack of blinking. «Why in opera-damnation is she taking so much?! She's taken more drugs in two months than I did in seven years! », the cop grabbed the rehearse key from within the diary. «And where's that psycho woman? What is she doing while I wander aimlessly and shamefully search through rusty lockers that alarmingly contain nothing? I swear if I find out she's been sitting somewhere while having a nice warm meal, pun, I'll go berserk. »
The blonde left for another room to unlock, where she found that parrot from earlier. «Apparently you can open doors…. and strangely your image isn't reflected in the mirror. »
It stared at her and followed with its eerie eyes as she searched the room for who knows what, doing so the woman found some useless breath mints and a moldy sandwich.
Aya approached the bird and it said «Merry! Merry fucking Christmas! »
«I abhor x-mas. »
«….DIE….! »
The parrot flew off and started to change just like the rat did, she aimed at it «Well, looks like being able to open doors isn't your only secret. »
The bird grabbed a chair with its now-abnormally long limb and threw it her way, she received it in the face and stumbled backward «Hey! », Aya fired once and the parrot died, dropping a mutated cookie. Next she picked up the chair and rammed it on the cadaver repeatedly until it broke. «I should have killed you earlier, seeing you hover above ground endlessly should have hinted me that you were fucked up! »
The officer searched another room and found a box containing a sheet of paper; someone had drawn a shitty pistol on it and written 'offense +1' beside it. She picked it up, stared, frowned and glanced around then back at it. «…..what am I supposed to do with this, eat it?» Brea tossed it aside and it flew gently towards the wall, upon contact with the solid concrete however the material crumbled violently, revealing a hidden room beyond. Some dead guy was hung on the wall there for some reason; poor dude might have committed suicide after discovering so many useless items lying around, the fake pistol must've broken the last bit of sanity he had left then.
Aya decided it might be best to leave him in peace and left, locking the door on her way out. Just in case.
Using the backstage key and allows to find Eve playing the piano, Brea stared «So it was you playing those eerie tunes, nicely done, but now I'll have to ask you to step away from the dark musical device slowly and without further delay; also, try not to set the room aflame, things have been bad enough for insurances as it is. »
Eve ignored the cop so Aya stepped closer, now realizing something of paramount magnitude, «Hey this is the Main Theme song of this game, doesn't make sense that you'd know such a thing…..wait, how did I knew that…? What have you done to my brains with your evil mutated brainwaves?! »
«For the love of superior cell evolutions, keep quiet! You're ruining this PS1 masterpiece with your incessant worthless ramblings. »
Aya aimed, «I don't even listen to my own boss so why would you think I'd take orders from you. »
«Because I'll kill you if you don't. And because I'm…..I am...Melissa…. », the host seemed to be fighting for control over Eve, «NO! I am a BAD ASS! Shut up like the puny human you are! »
«…not that it's especially weird just standing here watching two entities compete for control over the same organism; but I've got food waiting for me at my place, so if you could hurry this up. »
The actress resurfaced «Aahhh…!, I'm getting HOT!... », then Eve again, «I kept playing the tune flawlessly while taking back control, how's that for skills? Shows you that nucleic domination has finally come to an end once and for all. »
«K?»
Then Eve furiously struck the piano's keys obliterating them, «It saddens me that your limited IQ isn't capable to understand the beauty of this song: now you'll die. », she lifted off the floor and some unknown appendage grew from under the dress, now poking out onward like a solid curled tail.
Aya kept her aim at the mutating being ascending, «…You better tell me what this is not what I think it is…. »
Eve's only answer was to emit maniacal laughter, before setting off the battle tune once more.
«…..Fine, I'll shoot at it no matter the lack of most-required explanation. »
Eve hovered above ground, «It's not what you think, I'd just rather use this to hover than make use of those useless human legs. Once again…. the day for the mitochondria to be free has finally arrived! This'll be the biggest party in history! », she pointed one enlarged blue hand at the blonde, «But you didn't get any party invitation so I am in the obligation to terminate you. Not that it'll make the slightest difference in this overrated world. »
Brea shot at the blue appendage but it didn't fall off, «It's just like Osmund Saddler's, only less gross! »
Eve stopped moving, «Pff, looks like you still need some time, small-time hero…. I'll just let you live so your mitochondria become completely FREE! Then it'll be more of hassle to get rid of you, moreover the chances that you'll completely ruin my plans will grow as your powers mature, consequently my kind will have waited this long to control your specie for naught. My flawless logic and supreme tactical maneuvers scares even me… »
«I, um…», the screen became white, «Oh no not- !», back in that hospital room with the girl on the stretcher, «…That kid again, is she somehow endowed with powers to teleport…? », a man with a white lab coat approached, «...that doctor….his greasy hair reminds me of someone… » when the flashback ends Aya is left rubbing her bleeding eyes before realizing Eve is gone. She wipes her stained hands on her dress, «Mitochondria to be free….?...does this mean it'll violently erupt from my skin pores like some abrupt painful mutation? I hope not….. else, it might hurt. I'm 27% positive of that…..»
The cop glanced in the direction of the piano noticing another hole in the ground, «If she keeps doing that the heat system will definitely have a hard time keeping this building warm. She's so evil…. » Aya looked down but couldn't gauge how far it stretched into the thick darkness, «….oh well, time to break my remaining functional leg it seems. » Brea ended in the sewers, apparently Eve wanted to bathe in icy filthy waters and be surrounded by the smell of human wastes. «Charming…..but still not the last place I'd want to be, it's better than being stuck with my boss. »
She looked ahead and saw this tall arch above two parallel set of stairs, someone had made a graffiti there which read ''Heavenly Gate'', even though there was no way to reach that part unless one was equipped with wings.
«Whoever did this is abnormally tall and has little taste in art. » Aya then heard someone crying and thought her comment had hurt the feelings of said ''artist'', which she did not care about. Besides there were more urgent matter to attend to, like the two mutated rats that had just pounced out of nowhere, along with the giant toad. Its overgrown tongue lashed about but missed as the woman rolled in the dirty water, she spat some liquid out while blinking fast, «Bad idea. » Not interested in making new friends she then shot them all to Hell in no time with her powerful gun. Then she got hinted at receiving the parasite Scan power, which is utterly devoid of any help and much more so for experienced players.
Brea just stared, «….the hell...? ... What was it that just appeared in front of my eyes….? »
The now-smelly blonde ran towards the arch as unspecified things flopped around her ankles, the sniffling became even more distinct and then she saw that transparent girl once more. «This is no place to be crying….among other things. I can see why you don't want to remain in that hospital but surely you could have decided to teleport somewhere nicer than here…? »
The mute appearance ran to her right and vanished again, «….what's her problem anyway? » Aya dismissed the encounter as being of no importance, she deemed more urgent to investigate the box that stood nearby. When she opened the lid a voice said, «Your inventory is full…..of shit! »
The cop turned around «Who's there? » but no one seemed to be stupidly hiding in the shadows. Not one to be fazed by ghostly moronic voices or nauseating objects floating about, the woman decided to investigate the staircase. There she had to fight two additional rodents who tried to gnaw her head off or BBQ her alive, plus more boxes containing insignificant objects such as a broom and an XButt360. «Nice background vibe playing in the sewers though, makes it almost worthwhile having to spend some time here gathering disgusting residues in between my toes. »
She went back down and found a hidden room containing three boxes, the first was full of air, which is something one has little use for unless suffering from CO2 buildup. The second had a piece of paper with ''Range +2'' on it, Aya roughly threw it away but the sheet only made it as far as the amount of range indicated.
The last included a vest named ''Null Protector''. Taking a look at the stats on the vest's tag, Brea realized the name was more than fitting; therefore proceeded to magically remove the small points from it with her Super Tool Kit in order to augment her own indestructible vest. «There, not much but still better than nothing, wouldn't you agree VOID? », she looked around, «Still, who in the fuck put these here….? » Not a mystery with much appeal at being elucidated, the cop just left and finally went where the girl had run to.
There Aya came face to face with a gateway but not to worry, the switch was conveniently placed left of it, along with a phone….and someone dead floating next to that. She dismissed the cadaver as just another inconsequential substance drifting in soiled liquid and pulled the switch. As the gate opened she got assaulted by two toads which she shot effectively not even looking their way as she ran off. «Got no time to chat; wandering in sewers was never part of some unattained childhood dream. », then thinking about the girl, «Not for me anyway. »
Brea ran through the next small passage seeing that the charming lady in red was waiting in the back near a second gate. «Freeze! »
«Told you I can't do that while hovering, moreover asking such a thing to an all-powerful creature like me is a ludicrous request. »
The cop felt her body getting hot again, «Goddamn how am I supposed to concentrate while having these early menopause symptoms!? A least Melissa was fortunate to die young so she won't go through that shitty phase. »
Eve laughed, «That's the one right thing you said since we met. So….ready to take me on by yourself? Or you plan to flank me with your brown colleagues…? »
«Huh? You know Daniel? »
The unnatural being grinned so Aya suddenly made a face, «...you're referring to the feces aren't you…..that is just messed up, even for you. »
«Well even if you had more people with you they'd just BURN, right?! », she laughed maniacally for a very long period of time whereas Brea just stood there watching. Then after one hundred years the cop coughed, «…Still here. »
Eve pointed her oversized finger at her, «Everyone else but you….YOU are destined to be part of this awesome adventure….that is until they make two other games and ruin everything. I really should burn them all as well to prevent such atrocities…. Paxton Fettel is also right, you ALL deserve to die. »
«Tell me Eve, why?! Why am I the only one?! »
«You're not, plenty of other ruined sequels out there, hell Silent Hill was put to shame after the three first classics. Damn, the shit they made…..and people actually bought that. »
«…what in holy bacon are you talking about?! »
«…..You really should take your medication; your outbursts of questions are getting quite irritating; even if you know what medicine did to Melissa… », she smirked.
«I don't need any goddamn placebo! All I want is to put bullets in your forehead. »
«No you won't. » on that Eve faced the bars and turned into an orange gooey substance allowing her to dematerialize passing through the metal structure and reconstruct on the other side. What do you know, Raziel isn't the only who can pull that trick. The unconcerned creature coolly glided off not looking back, showing her middle index at the cop.
Brea could have easily followed seeing she was so thin but decided it was about time she exited this stinking hell. She lowered her gun, «Fuck it. », and was about leaving when something else than feces moved in the water. A giant crocodile of sort emerged, electric sparks gathering at the tip of its mouth. Some out of nowhere voice indicated her that there was two targets, Aya frowned while aiming, «Shut it. » and got rid of the whole beast with one devastating bullet. Then she got informed that the parasite power Slow became available, as if this would change anything at all; along with the ''Worthless Vest'' she immediately Super Tooled Shazam Bam Nothing To It into her equipped vest.
Brea finally returned in the jolly icy winter outside where more useless morons awaited, for some reason the two clueless police officers and the medic were nowhere to be seen. She suspected they'd left to enjoy a hot cup of coffee in the Café nearby; the dead homeless man's body was still in the middle of the street though. Instead, a reporter and his cameraman where there to instill new bothersome feelings in her.
The reporter, who was wearing a very shitty coat that reminded her of some feces she'd seen down in the sewers, was talking into his bare hand as if it was a microphone; while the cameraman was busy filming the poor valet who still stood there frozen.
«We're live-» he suddenly giggled, «Haha, ''live'', do you get it? », then was back at being serious, «In front of Canary-Energy Hall which has become a scene of complete chaos!...from what I've heard anyway since we're not allowed to g inside by fear of dying an atrocious death by spoontanious comb-potion.
Brea approached, «Fuck's sakes, it's ''spontaneous combustion'' AND that's not what actually happened here; they were set on fire by a powerful being who sings opera very well. Although she's rather narcissist and…..well…..pretty. »
«Miss! You are the survivor of this whole very much fucking horrible ordeal, CORRECT!? »
She received some saliva in her eyes but only stared in anger. The cameraman finally got tired of filming a clothed popsicle and approached her, the reporter resumed his annoying interview, «Until now, this combo-tion theory has been acknowledged only by occult enthusiasts…and some Satan cultists which no one gives a shit about. Oh and schizophrenic people somewhere. Probably at Mount Massive. »
«You shouldn't laugh about mental disorders….at least they appear to be smarter than you.»
He dismissed that, «This awesome incident happened on of Christmas Eve of all nights! That's like the best Christmas present ever! »
Fuck he was annoying, and the woman would have pulled her gun on him if not for her partner showing up… «No Aya don't do this…. » and shooting him in the head himself. Empty cranium pieces flew everywhere; the cameraman didn't know what to do but the two NYPDs just started talking as if nothing had happened.
Brea finally wiped the saliva from her face, «Excessive use of Police force, good job Daniel. »
«Sorry I'm late, I was kind of busy sleeping seeing this crap occurred in the middle of the night…. »
«It's only 7PM. »
He ignored that and embarked in the police car, she blinked and followed. After driving for a while Daniel turned to her, «Say….what's that stench? Changed your perfume?...oh, and you OK? Maybe I should have asked that first…. »
«You know me, as tough as adamantium. I'm fine. », she just recalled something which made her laugh.
Her partner glanced at her, «Oh shit not again, don't tell me you're going crazy like last Christmas….. »
«You'd like that…no it's just that I remembered my date must still be there knocked unconscious among the cadavers. No doubt he'll be confused as hell once he comes to, if he does! »
He remained quiet as she kept on laughing, his ass tight because he never really knew what to expect from her. Better not say anything, nor move or breathe.
«Anyway I went out with him because he kept harassing me to go, even dropped to his knees once and started crying; and it was very embarrassing because we were waiting in line at ShitDonald's. So it was either have him escort me to that opera nightmare or repeatedly bash his face on another customer's head, then go to prison for double murder. This whole shitty affair turned out alright in the end thanks to her. »
She seemed to return to her stoic self so Daniel replied, «Yeah but the OPERA of all places?! Usually you go spend the evening at the shooting range or play games by yourself while stuffing your face in pizza and such greasy shit that'll make you look like me very fucking soon. »
«…..saw the ad in the newspaper…..I dunno, caught my eye…probably because when I noticed the article I was face first on the floor since I had tripped over a banana peel some dumb ass had tossed in the apartment's stairs; having rolled down the steps I ended face to face with a bunch of wet and dirty papers another dumb ass had discarded there. I live in a world full of dumbasses…. »
He looked at her, «So you were on this case, literally. Finally got some cop instinct in ya, huh.»
She turned her face towards the window, lost in her own thought. Nothing new there though. After a while a shoe hit the glass violently, «Killing civilians again, Daniel. »
Instead he turned the sirens on and went faster, didn't want anybody to write down the car's plate numbers and make a deposition against him. Again. While he raced towards the NYPD, Aya vaguely asked, «Shouldn't you be with your son? I mean you barely see him. »
«It's fine, he's still a newborn, won't miss me until he's a bit older. »
«…..Your son's seven now. See what I meant? »
He just changed the subject, «Anyway, not to change the subject but yeah, I heard things from people who were there…. »
«There was nobody there, Daniel, except burnt corpses. »
«….This is ONE HELL of an incident, huh?! »
«You're way too happy about murders for a sane cop like yourself. Besides, 'incident' is not fitting for that situation… »
«Then what would you call it? »
«A big fucking happy bon fire. », then she started mumbling to herself which scared him, «….mitochondria…symbiosis…hospital beds with creepy tune…..fleshy rats and human dejections… », she then zoned out, her eyes becoming dryer as she stared vacantly.
Daniel glanced her way, «…You asleep? », then upon realizing her eyes were still open, «Hey you're not having one of those psychedelic silent moments, are ya?! », the woman didn't respond so he glanced on the back seat at his baseball bat, feeling relieved to know he could count on it if needed. Sometimes, she was just too weird.
He killed another civilian by mistake before entering the station, failing to break in time hence destroyed both the car and the brick wall. His partner didn't react to any of it so when he exited the wreckage and bust open her door, seeing that dribble pearled down her chin he had to slap her into sense for her to come to.
«…..sorry, I was thinking about something….. » she exited and stepped on broken glass which dug in her bare feet.
«Must have been some intense mathematics for you to look knocked out like that. »
Then the camera cut to an overview of the pixel New Yerk City as a ghostly Eve sang the game theme. Some unemployed dude in a helicopter was flying around the whole island, obviously wasting fuel for absolutely no other reason. Brea's thoughts appeared floating over the bridge for everyone to see; apparently she had unlocked telepathic capabilities as well.
«It all started with that joyful bon fire, six days that were to become a serious big ass party for all….. »
We revolve around a boat that seems not to be floating on darkened blue water but ice since it's so damn reflective and solid-looking.
«People will eventually forget and go on with their lives….the ones that survived, that is. »
Floats over a second bridge with way too many lights on it, that ought to be bad for electric bills.
«But I'll never forget it….just like Leon S. Kennedy never will. And even though it just happened an hour ago I'm talking about it as if it occurred last week….that or I have superpowers to bend time also. Anyway, it was pure ecstasy…. »
Camera shows that fuel-wasting helicopter revolving around the Statue of Liberty, time and again as if the pilot was having a seizure.
«….but the worse is it was also six days filled with familiar memories that I would have rather not recalled because they freak me out. Like that time on Christmas I had received a shitty pink pajama with cats on it….. the atrocious thing actually made my eyes bleed plus I puked all over it….. My mother blamed it on Santa of course, but I knew better. »
Screen faints black and the song fades out slowly. That's some peculiar powers.
Author Note: if you're interested into parody/humor videos on Parasite Eve (plus other games or music video tributes), I have it on my YT channel. Since Fan Fiction doesn't allow copying of links, just type the following in your browser:
SURPRISE – Parasite Eve (Humor, part 1 of 6)
You'll find it under the username De Void.