This is the beginning of a long story about my absolute favourite T.V couple. They're just perfect to write about. I hope you enjoy and once we have gone past the immediate things that happen I hope to expand the story into whole new territory. Please keep checking for new chapters and especially appreciate feedback/reviews as it inspires the writing knowing you actually have readers!! Thanks

Christian and Syed following on from Friday 16th September

Chapter One. Christian and Syed

Syed's face was full of emotion. Christian could hardly bear to look at him. ." I couldn't do it- I'm sorry." He looked at Christian pleading with his eyes for Christian to understand "I was going to,….I really wanted to. She needs me too much right now, I… couldn't hurt her."

"But hurting me is okay is it?" Christian knew at that moment it was always going to be like this. Syed would never tell his family, or his precious Amira. Syed could still barely admit his feelings to himself. It just wasn't enough, "Then you made your choice" Christian said. He got up and walked. He had to get out, now, anywhere, as long as it was away from Syed. He felt sick, shaky.

Christian had never felt so vulnerable to anyone, never felt such an addictive compulsion for any man until Syed. The more Syed fought his feelings for Christian, the more intensely he expressed them when they were alone together. The passion consumed them both.

Until he'd met Syed, Christian had been confident in himself. When he'd first come out as a young man, he'd often had to deal with people's ignorance, even outright hostility. But he wasn't the type to become bitter or defensive. He had a healthy self respect, and a developed sense of humour and until recently was not afraid to challenge any prejudice. Lately though, he had found himself uncharacteristically biting his tongue on more than one occasion. The recent violent attack he'd received, the emotional turmoil with Syed had shaken him, left him open and hurting. He had taken more ignorant remarks from Syed's mother than anyone should have to deal with. 'Enough,' he thought as he headed home.

James was still there, zipping up his bag. He looked up as Christian came in. "Sorry," he apologised, immediately feeling in the way. "Took me longer than I expected to find somewhere….. I left the food in the fridge to say thank you."James cared for him. Christian knew James would stay if he asked and he was here now, free from conflict, uncomplicated. All Christian wanted was to get rid of the feeling that was gripping his insides. He needed to dull the pain, to take it away. He threw James' bag on the bed. Walking towards him, he moved in deliberately close, so there could be no mistaking his intention "Don't worry 'bout it," he paused, holding James' gaze, "we can … eat it later." He pulled James to him.

At first he was tender, but his need to drive Syed from his mind made him more aggressive in his lovemaking. James responded instantly to Christian. He'd always found Christian attractive. Who wouldn't? Christian was a beautiful man. What most attracted him was Christian's confidence and sheer physical presence. Christian pulled him down to the bed, kissing him, undoing his belt, sure in his movements. And then just like that everything stopped, someone was ringing the door bell and Christian was pulling away. James, still breathing heavily, hardly knew what was happening. He sat up, reaching for Christian to pull him back to the bed, still full of desire. "C'mon, Christian, leave it." But Christian was all ready standing up, doing up his trousers. The bell rang again, more insistent.

"James will you answer it?" Christian said.

"Are you serious?….Can't we just leave it?"

"James, … please, answer it" Bewildered, James got up, did up his belt and picked up the intercom. The voice on the other end came through immediately, "It's me, Syed." James looked at Christian and put his hand over the receiver.

"It's Syed…what do you want me to say… shall I let him in?"

"Tell him it's late ….no …I'll tell him," Christian said, covering the space in one stride and taking the receiver from James.

"What do you want Syed?"

"I need to talk to you Christian, open the door."

"It's late Sy, I'm busy."

"Christian, please, let me in,"

Christian pressed the door release. 'Let him come,' he thought knowing full well what Syed would see, would think. As soon as Syed entered the room, he took in the scene – the atmosphere in the room was charged, James was still breathing fast, his chest rising and falling, and the bed sheets were in disarray. Syed felt as if he'd been stabbed, so sharp and quick were his jealousy and anger. He fought to hold it down, to keep his voice steady.

"James," he acknowledged, "Still here?" He couldn't keep the accusatory tone out of his voice and James noticed and was surprised.

Syed looked at Christian, 'Oh, God forgive me,' he thought. He knew then, if he hadn't known before, that he loved Christian, wanted him like he could never want Amira.

"You know what Syed? If you've come to talk about work, or moan about your mother, forget it, it's late, James and I are about to go to bed." Christian said the words quietly, with deliberation, knowing their effect. "So whatever it is, it's going to have to wait."

"You know I'm not here about work Christian," said Syed challenging him.

Right then, he didn't care if James knew, he wanted him to know; more than that, he wanted James to know that Christian was his. James looked from one to the other and realisation hit him. All those questions Syed had asked, seemingly so casually, the friendly warning to steer clear, Christian's erratic behaviour.

"Christian, I'm gonna go."

"James, wait, I'm sorry …. …" But all James wanted at that moment was to be gone. He was in the way; he felt it and he wanted to be out of that room, fast. He felt somehow dirty. All the feeling of half an hour before had vanished and been replaced by the cold reality that Christian was consumed by someone else. He grabbed his packed bag and without looking at Syed said with some bitterness, "I'll see you around Christian"

"James I'll call you…" said Christian, but James was all ready closing the door.

"What do you want Syed? – I've told you I'm not doing this anymore, I want you to go."

Christian moved to the kitchen, Syed followed standing in the doorway.

"Ahh Syed, just go will you. James has gone, You've got what you wanted haven't you? Mission accomplished, run back to Amira, that's how it goes isn't it?"

For the first time that night, Christian looked Syed full in the face and Syed saw him then, as if he'd never really seen him before, as if a layer had been removed, a veil that he'd blinded himself with. Christian, clear in his self belief. At that moment all Syed wanted was to cut this thing out of himself, this shame. He was a coward. He couldn't live up to anyone's expectations, least of all, his own. He had failed everyone and everything that really mattered to him. 'You're too hard on yourself,' his father had said to him only yesterday- 'I'm proud of you son.' But Syed knew what he was, and now all he wanted was to attack Christian, force Christian to fight him back. He wanted Christian to hurt him, he wanted to hurt and be hurt. As if somehow that would absolve him, cleanse him.

"It didn't take you long to move on, that must be a record even for you" he said bitterly. " He moved closer, his features twisted with jealously and self loathing

"Good is he? What did you tell him? 'If you want me you can have me," he said mocking Christian with his own words, trying to goad him. He knew this must hurt. Christian had said them earlier that day with such naked, open hearted feeling.

"Get out." said Christian,

And then Syed leapt and pushed Christian so hard he fell against the sink, taking him by surprise, banging his hip painfully against the side of the counter. Syed was no fighter, but he was wiry and his emotion was driving him. He came at Christian again, before Christian had time to recover, pulling him down and then they were wrestling on the cold kitchen floor. Christian held him then. Of the two, Christian had the edge when it came to sheer physical power. He pinned Syed down with the full length of his body, holding his arms. Christian lifted his head and Syed looked up at him, eyes dark, lifted his head to meet Christian's and then they were kissing, both of then drowning in the powerful intensity of their connection.

…Syed's body was burning, every bit of him was melting, turning to heat and liquid and the tightness between his legs was so hard and sweet he groaned. Christian pulled away a little, risked moving his hand from Syed's arm to his belt. "Nothing happened Sy, nothing, do you understand me?" He undid Syed's trousers, Syed moaning for him. He undid his own, still holding Syed down with one arm. Syed moved against Christian, felt his blood pounding, the cold floor, the heat and skin and stiffness of them both. Christian, kissed his neck, his mouth, using his tongue, running one hand up and down Syed's slim form, pulling open his shirt, kissing more deeply now, tasting him. Then he rolled onto his back, Syed with him, not breaking the contact and Syed kept up the pressure his movements slower now, more sensual.

"Sy, I want to be inside you,"

The first night they had spent together Christian asked but Syed had refused. He felt that if he could resist this one thing then somehow he had kept some honour with his religion. But in this moment there was only Christian.

"Okay" he said, his voice so quiet and suffused with passion Christian wasn't sure if he'd heard it or not.

Without speaking Syed pulled away, got up and walked to the bed. This thing with Christian seemed to have a life of its own. And now here, for him, on the edge of the abyss, there was no going back. He lay face down, felt a little cold and then Christian was behind him kissing his neck, his back, turning him on his side and running his hands over Syed's thighs, between his legs, warming him, rubbing oil into him, making him harder again and then using his finger to help Syed. He took his time and Syed relaxed. Syed could feel himself, slippery with oil, then Christian was entering him, carefully at first and then with a little more force, sweeter and deeper until Syed felt he couldn't breathe, that he was transformed. The rhythm and the heat of Christian's thrusts were bringing Syed to a point of explosion, absolution. Christian lifted him then, held his hips and Syed pushed back. He could feel Christian's balls against his buttocks, it seemed indescribably erotic. Then they were both coming, Christian deep inside him, Syed spontaneously, freely all over himself. They lay there for a long time, Christian completely covering Syed's body, breathing together. Syed laid one cheek against the bed and Christian stroked his face, so gently, that Syed almost wept with the overwhelming tenderness he felt.

"Christian," he began.

"Syed, don't say anything"

Later they got up, cold and sticky, moved to the shower, Syed leading Christian this time. They didn't speak and Syed could feel the sadness in Christian. It was always there, in the back of Christian's mind. However wonderful this was, it was stolen time. Syed would go back to Amira and there would come a day when it wouldn't be enough. He didn't want to think about that day coming. Christian turned his back, leaned his forehead to the wall, folded his arms above his head and as the hot water pounded them; Syed pressed against him, loving the indecent joy of flesh on flesh, the hardness of Christian's body. All Syed wanted at that moment was to reassure him. He kissed Christian, took the lead, soaping him, running his hands all over him, stroking him, soothing him, trying to make him know all he felt.

In the morning it was Syed who woke first. His mind was troubled. His religion, what made him the man he was and wanted to be, was in conflict with these new feelings. He shouldn't think this way. It wasn't right to feel this much desire for and surrender to, another human being. But through Christian he felt that he was beginning to discover his true nature in all senses of the word. The Qur'an itself taught that life was a test for the individual to come to know his nature.

He looked at Christian, in the innocence of sleep, 'I love him but I'm so full of fear,' he admitted to himself, ' but I do know what's in my heart, and what I have to do.' The thought of facing his family terrified him but he knew he couldn't go on with the lies. Christian stirred then, woke and reached for Syed laying his head on Syed's chest and Syed held him.

"Christian, I'm gonna tell them today. I need to be with you, I can't keep lying to myself and I have to stop this wedding. Amira should know the truth"

Syed felt the most alive he'd felt in a long time. Full of the energy that inner conviction brought. He moved Christian onto his back and Christian didn't protest, still sleepy and afraid that if he woke fully he'd find that Syed had not just said those words. He lay still, not wanting the moment to end... Syed pulled the covers back, the room was warm, he moved down the length of Christian's body until his face was next to Christian's groin. He took Christian in his mouth then, something he had done to no other man. He loved that he could make Christian harder, make him moan with pleasure. He licked, sucked and teased, pressing his head against Christian, until Christian buried his hand in Syed's hair and came. Christian was all over Syed, in his mouth, on his face and hair and Syed loved it, the taste of him, the tension between the beauty of their connection and the deep lust of it all.

Christian woke later to find Syed gone. Syed had left a note which read,

'Christian, wait for me '

All day Christian stayed in the flat, moving things around, showering, watching TV that didn't interest him, making food he wasn't hungry for. His mind ran over and over the last twelve hours. Why did Syed have have this effect on him? He'd never been more scared in his life. Last night was beautiful and even this morning he had allowed himself to believe that Syed would face up to everyone. But now, here on his own, it seemed impossible. Syed was asking him to be patient yet again and he didn't know how much longer he could go on.

Syed had left Christian's early. A number of people saw him leaving the flat including Roxy who was on her way to the doctors for Amy's check up. 'No way' she thought and immediately put the idea out of her mind-Syed was engaged – it was Monday morning; they worked in the same place. It was nothing. Yet the idea kept nagging at her. Christian had been really preoccupied over the last few months and the old jokey Christian had been replaced with someone more serious, absorbed. 'Course, he still hasn't got over the attack' she thought but still, she knew there was something else bothering Christian. Later, she called at the flat but there was no answer. Christian had seen her coming down the street and couldn't face her.

Syed went straight to Amira's.

Amira felt physically sick. This could not be happening. Not Syed. How could this be true? Part of her had known for a long time that Syed was not fully hers. She had felt it, thought maybe he was seeing another woman -tried not to think it. But this? And with Christian? Unbidden pictures came into her mind. No! It was disgusting! Not Syed! What was she going to do? Syed was luminous, he didn't even seem ashamed. He was full of concern for her, but Amira could feel that something was released in him. He looked terribly tired but also somehow full of light and energy.

"I need to go and see my parents, while I've still got the courage. I am so sorry Amira, truly, I didn't set out to hurt you. I did love you; I do love you, you're beautiful."

"So why can't that be enough for you?" Amira said.

"Amira I just can't do it, it's not you, you're wonderful, any man you choose is a lucky man. It just ….can't be me." said Syed,

"I have to be honest. It's been tearing me up. I've been so confused… but surely it's better I tell you now than we marry... I'll only hurt you."

Amira could hardly believe what she was hearing. It seemed so shocking that he was actually saying those words. Syed left then and Amira cried as if her heart would break. Where could she go now? She would be an outcast. Syed had lost his mind. This couldn't be the end of it; someone must make him see sense.