Title: There Were Times

Pairing: None (omg, can you believe that?)

Summary: There were times Tsuna wished for things. There were times he got what he least expected.

Disclaimer: No, no you little darling, this is Amano-sensei's brainchild.

Author's Notes: First attempt at a KHR fic. A very short drabble. Post-Varia arc. Un-beta'd so expect slight errors on some parts. I just needed to get this out of my head since it's been sitting on my brain cells for quite some time now.

There were times when Sawada Tsunayoshi just wished to vanish. There were times when he couldn't stand the pain the members of his famiglia were going through. There were times when the only thing he needed to do was reach out but found himself not to be able to because of his weakness. There were times when he could've said the right words but didn't because he wasn't sure he believed them himself. There were times when he would do anything, even die for them because he didn't want to lose them.

And...

There were times when he could only reminisce because there were those times and those times were no longer there.

But...

There were also those times that kept repeating themselves, those times wouldn't go away; times when he didn't know what exactly to do because everything happening around him just seemed so absurd.

Take this time for an example. He was sitting on his bed and the other guardians were playing Spin-the-Bottle on his bedroom floor. This was one of those times when he was torn between two options: to watch them with amazement or to sleep and forget that his—this set of guardians were capable of such mundane source of entertainment and that they actually take part in something which didn't involve blood and murder. Or punishment and retribution.

"Tsunayoshi."

There were times when Tsuna would do anything to get close to these guardians but this time, he didn't like the way his name rolled off this particular guardian's tongue. He would rather stay put on his bed and watch them play their little game or sleep, whichever made the faster move.

"Care to join us?"

The tenth Vongola boss shook his head before lying on the bed, sighing.

"Maybe next time Mukuro-kun."

There were times when past experiences with his guardians floated in his subconscious and they wouldn't stop giving him nightmares and those horrific moments in his friends' lives would even invade his daydreams. There were times he would shiver and close his eyes because he couldn't stop the images from coming back to him. Knives cutting open Gokudera's fair skin... a sword piercing Yamamoto's lean form... Thunder burning Lambo's fragile body... Tentacles squeezing the life out of Chrome...Mukuro...whoever... Metal crunching the bones of Ryohei's hands...

And the one that haunted him the most, the one he didn't see happen before his eyes, but brought numbing chills down his spine...

Hibari being beaten almost to death by the person he didn't know would be one of his guardians...

Those were painful times, times he would like to forget but would never forget because doing so would be failing to acknowledge the protection his guardians have given him; the risks they have involved themselves in just to keep the famiglia safe and the sky untainted. That would mean turning his back on their sacrifices and he would never do anything that would render his guardians' efforts to waste. Never.

He stared at his dark-haired guardians spin the bottle lazily.

There were times when he never imagined he would find Mukuro and Hibari at his feet, turning a little bottle around without finding the need to use it as an instrument for inflicting bodily pain.

Those times were gone. This time, he would take it all in, he would watch and he would emblazon this memory in his mind as his Guardian of the Ring of Cloud spoke in a solemn voice.

"Will there be a next time Sawada Tsunayoshi?"

Tsuna smiled.

There were times when the 10th Vongola Famiglia Boss would do anything just for a happy moment to repeat itself. This wasn't one of those times. This wasn't a happy moment. It was just special. And special things need not be repeated for they lose the radiance and beauty they give off after the first time. Once was enough. The memory the only three of them shared in this simple room would be a secret. Even ten years later it would still be a secret. A secret when...

There was that time. And Tsuna would always smile about it even if his most powerful guardians would not.

-end-

A/N: Criticisms and comments accepted. I'm not that satisfied with it but at least I got it off my head. No flaming please, Tsuna's X BURNER is the only thing allowed to ignite.