The strong one the broken one.
A/N: We all know I don't own them so….I hope you like it I enjoyed writing it while I should be sleeping. Thanks for taking the time to read it and please Review!
It was late in night or very early when Hermione woke up in her room at Grimmauld place she wasn't sure, but something was telling her she needed to go down stairs that there was something wrong. She got up and walked toward the living room cautiously, even if the order had won war without losing any members about a year ago she was still cautious because you never know. When she entered the living room she saw Severus Snape her boyfriend from the past 5 monds sitting on a couch illuminated by dim candle light. After war he started to look much better he wasn't as mean as before he also had taken his teaching glamurie off even when he was teaching, he cut his hair, had grey-blue eyes, a smaller nose, white tooth, broad shoulders, was still tin but muscular in other words he was a real hunk… But as she got closer she saw his eyes were red, puffy and unfocused she also saw a bottle of what must have been firewhiskey on the table in front of him. She crunched before him lowering her wand. Put a hand on his arm hoping she could get his attention she knew he must be pretty drunk by then and asked herself what could have driven him to drink it wasn't like him. She squeezed his upper arm softly and his eyes started to focus.
"Hermione?" He asked confused.
"Right here Rus." She told him kissing his knuckles; he looked so vulnerable right now like a small scared boy instead of a brave young man.
"No…." He said shaking his head.
"No what baby? Talk to me please."He was still shaking his head.
"No...No…Leave me, stay away."She knew he wasn't talking about leaving him alone now but as in forever.
"Why should I do that?" She asked him as she took his head between her hands to keep him from shaking it, she saw his eyes full of tears and his lips tremble.
"Because…because I…me…you…"She saw he was having an internal battle. "If you stay with me your sky will only get greyer because I'm already walking under the storm." Tears were slipping from his eyes and he was holding her hands in his own. "The light in me it…it is fading. Escape, stay away please….please understand that even if I'm asking you to go I don't want to lose you. But I have to protect you, you should not walk with pain anymore take a breath…"
He was starting to sob now and Hermione just wanted to take him in her arms and promise him that everything is alright that they would be alright but she knew what was happening. He was breaking no he already had been broken from a long time but as always was good at hiding it and broke down just now and she could not help him, not yet she needed to know what had finally broken him down to help him mend himself. She felt anger toward herself and the rest of their family and friends who all had blundered him after war and during because he was the strong one the one that didn't felt instead of helping him the one that had suffered the most to heal. He stopped crying and kissed both her hands before continuing.
"So leave me my love I know you are still in time to. I'm not who you and everyone thinks I am…I'm not heaven send, I'm not strong, I'm not brave I…I…I am just broken. Please go now before you see the real me: I can only hurt and deception those who come close to me. I would like it to be the one you think I am and not be saying you this, but I am not…..and you know it deep inside and you also know I don't deserve you or your time…." Hermione finally had enough and put a hand on his mouth to silence him.
"Shhh…Stop that line of thought right there." She told him firmly and sat down onto his lap while she put her arms around his neck laid his head onto her shoulder and passed her fingers through his hair massaging his scalp…Comforting him. "I don't know why you are telling me all this or why you believe it Rus, but none what you said is true. You are brave. You are strong. You are really heaven send and yes you are also broken but that doesn't matter." She whispered in his ear.
"Really?" He sounded so…so lost it broke Hermione's heart. How could they not have seen him fade?
"Yes baby really…it's not even your fault you are we should have given you time to heal, to be angry, to be sad not making you feel like you needed to there for all of us." She kissed his head and felt him relax slowly. "Rus why do you think you hurt and disappoint those around you?" She felt him tens before he answered crying again.
"Wwhen I ca…came here…I had a dis…discussion with father he, he said so he said he doesn't love me that I don't deserve you that…that…that he…that I…" Hermione thought this was strange because Albus Dumbledore was in the continent in some kind of convention, not at Grimmauld. Of course she could not tell Severus that.
"Shhh….shhh…I am sure he didn't meant to…shhh…and if he did he is wrong." He nodded in her neck and she knew she would need to take him to bed before he fell or cried himself asleep. "Why don't we go bed?"
"Bed?" Was all he could mumble.
"Yes let's go." She told him while she got up.
After she did he tried to imitate her but as he got up he saw the world move faster that himself. Hermione steadied him immediately and he grinned at her, it was official he wasn't drunk he was very drunk. The way upstairs toward her room was long and they almost fell servile times, she took him to her room because his room was too far away…screw Molly's rule about none sleeping together until those who did were married. She opened her bed to him while he held himself upright with the help of the bed post. She grabbed his hands and sat him down slowly, after he sat she took of his shoes, helped him with his dress pants and shirt. When he was in condition she laid him down and covered him. Once he was in bed she also got into and laid on her side caressing his head, she thought he was asleep when he opened one eye.
"Sorry…will get you in trouble with Molly…"
"Don't be and I would not be the only one mister. Now sleep." He hummed and closed his eyes again Hermione did the same and soon they were both asleep.
A/N:CONTINUE?
