Unicorns
"Remember, you don't remember anything," he repeats the words over and over, like a song or a prayer. A prayer, that I wouldn't remember. I don't want to remember. But memories of any horrible kind stay. Would stay. Silence is not unknown to me. Won't ever be unknown to me. Too many memories now to speak them all. My mind will not stay blank, though I have tried to make it so. Many times. I would try now but the words keep repeating, bringing with them a multitude of memory. I hear you, I remember, don't you remember why I'm here?
Unicorns, Doctor, unicorns.
He's repeating while his pretty poisons take effect. He doesn't know I always remember. That his sweet tasting poisons never have an effect. Not on me. The other girls retain nearly nothing, and barely that, but enough to be afraid. A great fear of something unknown.
You haven't met any unicorns, Doctor? Your medicines erase the girl's memories of all pretty things too. They see the ruined children of the cildru dyathe, and feel no fear. Why should they, when they will end up like them? Like in features, but not alive. Your poisons drain all thought of life, giving no will or want to remain.
I was riding with the unicorns before I came here. Now they are memories. No, now they are dreams.
Dreams, doctor, I dreamed the unicorns. The feel of warm healthful life holding me up, streaming faster than wind. The dreams are so real. I can feel...
The stiff bed beneath my legs, protected by a thin sheath of fabric. Ruffles. There is no wind to chill me. The air is thin. The fabric is safety. Why is it so important? Because when it is gone it will be worse.
Much worse.
Why? I can't seem to remember.
Thank you, doctor, for curing my precious daughter. Who said that? Be obedient. Thank you, doctor, I shall not dream of unicorns. They were so real, so, stop. Good girl.
You can't cloud my memories. I know what you do. I remember. I want to be home. There is another girl there.
No! You can't take my sister! I
There is a goblet at my mouth. It feels wrong. I have no thirst. Something is wrong. There is no choice but to drink. The liquid is like fire, burning. I remember the other drinks.
Sister knows a spell for fire. She knows how to but one out. I couldn't ever learn. But she never rode on a unicorn. Poor sister, she never flew.
Unicorns. Doctor, what are unicorns? I should remember. Memories, torn away. Shelter, torn away. I can feel the sheets clearly now. Is that good, Doctor? You have torn away everything.
Your hands are warm, Doctor. I remember them cold and dry, shaking hands. A pat on the cheek. She's a pretty one.
Can't be. He never saw me. Masks. Should I show him what's behind my masks? Unicorns are real. I shouldn't remember. I should remember. I can't remember which. I can't feel my body anymore, Doctor. Is that good?
You like the body, don't you, Doctor? The husk. I should show you my body. You can have the husk. I don't care for it. I should give you the husk. Good girl. You can have it.
No- it belongs to someone. Who? No, I belong to someone. So you can't have me. It is promised to someone. But I'll give you the husk. You like it, don't you. The body that's ridden on a unicorn.
Bad girl. Leave your dreams. Leave your nightmares. I'll make you better ones. I remember all your nightmares. But you can't make me forget my dreams.
The body is bleeding. Thank you, doctor. Now I can return to the darkness.
But one more thing, Doctor. You're to come with me. I want to show you my dreams.
Fool, to think you could play with Witch.
And Witch will return from the darkness on the back of a unicorn. I'm sorry, Doctor, but you should know. Witch will live. She belongs to someone. She promised to stay. Witch doesn't break her promises, Doctor.
I'll always remember.