This was my fic for Akira's 2012 Gundam Wing Advent calendar. Some of you have already read it over on LJ, but for those that haven't, I hope you enjoy it, get a good laugh from it and forgive me my warped sense of humor.

A very Merry Christmas to you all and thanks for all the kind reviews and support over these past 12 months.

Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing, it belongs to Bandai, Sotsu and associated parties. I just borrow the guys from time to time and return them a whole lot happier. Written for pleasure not profit.

Rating: R

Pairings: 1x2x1

Warnings: sap, humor, fluff, language, innuendo.

Written for the Gundam Wing 2012 Advent Calendar.

Summary: It's Heero and Duo's first Christmas together. Heero has never experienced what Duo terms a 'proper' Christmas and so his braided partner sets out to show Heero exactly what a 'real' Christmas with all the trimmings is all about.

Betaed by Karina *hugs*


" 'Tis The Season "

November 2012 - ShenLong

"Decorate your bum with Holly. Fah, La, La, La La, La, La, La, La."

Heero looked up sharply from his desk as his partner entered the office. He didn't remember the Christmas carol having those words.

"To sit down would be a folly. Fah, La, La, La La, La, La, La, La."

"Duo?" Heero questioned his partner.

The bell on the end of the Santa hat Duo sported tinkled loudly. "Yeah?"

"That isn't how the carol goes."

"Yeah, I know," Duo replied and sighed as he plunked down in his chair.

"Then why don't you sing the proper carol if you have to sing at all?"

Duo gave an evil grin. "But it's more fun to make your own version of it," he replied and then started to sing again. "Don we now our gay apparel – hey, Heero? Gay apparel - does that mean we have to wear snazzy pink jeans and matching shirts with those diamante things sewn all over them?"

Heero shook his head and rolled his eyes. "Next you'll be suggesting we all carry 'man bags'."

"I already carry my man bag," Duo said with an evil smirk and to prove his point, he grasped his balls through his uniform pants and gave them a light squeeze.

"Only you could be so crude, Duo," Heero scowled.

"Aw, come on, Heero. It's the festive season, time to be all happy, peace on earth and goodwill to all men, and women too I suppose."

"I wouldn't know."

Duo got up from his chair and walked over to his partner's desk. He draped an arm across Heero's shoulders and pressed a kiss to his lover's cheek. "I know you've never had a proper Christmas, Heero, but all that is about to change. I promise our first Christmas together is going to be one you will never forget. I'm going to show you exactly what Christmas is all about."

"Hn." Heero really couldn't see what all the fuss was about. Christmas was just another day on the calendar to him. "It's just an excuse to spend exorbitant amounts of money on useless crap."

Duo raised an eyebrow. "Not quite, oh lover of mine. Yes, I grant you that some people do go a little overboard with spending at this time of the year, but it doesn't have to cost the Earth and several colonies to have a wonderful Christmas with all the trimmings."

"And you know that, how?"

"Ah, trust me, Heero."

# # #

"What are you doing?" Heero asked as he placed a mug of cocoa on the coffee table before Duo and took a seat next to his lover on the couch. Duo was sitting with his feet drawn up under him, note pad in one hand and chewing on the end of a pencil.

"I'm making a list of all the things we need for Christmas."

"Looks more like you're giving yourself lead poisoning,"

Duo sheepishly pulled the pencil from his mouth. "It's not lead poisoning either, it would be graphite poisoning."

"I'm not talking about the lead in the pencil, I know that's graphite. It's the lead in the paint used on the wood of the pencil that will harm you," Heero replied, a little smug.

"Okay, Mr. Walking Wikipedia, I won't chew the end of my pencil." Duo lowered his voice to a husky purr and let his eyes take on a hungry look. "I'd rather you sucked on my pencil for me; or I'd happily suck on yours."

"I thought you were making a list of things we need for Christmas?" Heero said as he attempted to get the topic back on track. "Not discussing sucking the lead out of each other's pencil."

"Oh, Heero, the things you do to me," Duo moaned and discreetly adjusting himself he balanced the note pad on a knee. "Okay, back to business."

"What have you got written down so far?" Heero's curiosity got the better of him and he sidled along the couch until he was pressed against Duo's side and looking over his partner's arm to the note pad.

The page was blank.

"I've only just started," Duo claimed in his defense.

Heero snorted.

"Hmmm, first up we need a tree."

"What for? We already have several trees in the garden."

"We need a pine tree, in here, as a Christmas tree," Duo patiently explained.

"Oh, okay. Where do we get one of those?"

"We make a trip out into the woods and find one."

"Isn't that called stealing? Chopping down a tree on someone else's land?"

"The woods are a public area, Heero."

"It still doesn't sound right to me, besides, I've never chopped anything in my life. I wouldn't have a clue how to wield an axe."

"Lucky you have me then." Duo gave a wide grin and made a couple of 'swishing' motions through the air.

"Great, I'm dating an axe murderer," Heero muttered.

"Decorations," Duo said, ignoring his partner.

"What for?"

"The tree."

"Aa." Heero decided not to question further, he'd seen quite a few homes decorated to the hilt with lights, baubles, miniature Christmas scenes and such and knew they must have cost the owners a small fortune or second mortgage to purchase. The last thing he needed or wanted was for Duo to decide their home needed to have all that 'over the top' accessorizing as well.

"Food."

"We have food in the pantry and freezer, I only went grocery shopping a couple of days ago," Heero replied. "Don't tell me you've eaten it all already?"

"Not normal food, Heero, Christmas food. And no, I haven't eaten us out of house and home," he added, a little miffed.

"What's the difference between normal food and Christmas food? It's all food, isn't it?"

Duo sighed. "Yes, it is, but Christmas food is slightly different. We eat things like turkey, pork, ham, roasted vegetables, Christmas pudding, fruit cake, mince pies, drink egg nog and nibble on pretzels, nuts and so on."

"Mostly junk food then."

"Not all of it. Can we get back to the list?"

"Sure."

"We need to get Christmas cards and presents, then some mistletoe, crackers, lights..."

Heero sighed and sat back, letting his lover drone on. He was beginning to wish that Christmas didn't exist.

# # #

"There should be a good one over here," Duo said and pointed the flashlight through the curtain of falling snow and green boughs.

"Why can't we have a fake tree like normal people?" Heero muttered. "My fingers and toes are freezing," he added as he trudged behind Duo. Clasped in one mittened hand was an axe. Duo had insisted they come out here under the cover of darkness to get their tree as it would be quieter, no other people around to swipe their tree from under them. Heero still said it was because they were stealing and Duo didn't want to get caught. Suddenly Duo stopped and Heero ran right into the back of him as he'd not been watching where he was going.

"Oof," Duo huffed as he stumbled forward. "Watch where you're going there, buddy."

"Sorry. Why did you stop?"

"There."

Heero peered ahead into the clearing where a solitary tree stood. The moon decided to come out from behind the clouds at that point and bathed the clearing in silver light, a moonbeam choosing to shine directly on the tree itself and illuminate it. Heero shook his head. This was getting to be too much like the movies, he thought.

"Our tree," Duo sighed softly, his eyes taking on a dreamy look. Heero snorted and shouldered past his partner, axe swinging experimentally in his hand.

The moment was lost.

Heero stopped at the base of the small tree and stared intently at it. He gauged the height, thickness of the trunk, sharpness of the axe and put it all together in his head to come up with the amount of swing he would need to put into the axe to chop it down successfully. Eying the trunk, he gave a couple of practice swings, Duo ducking for cover as he was nearly decapitated by the flailing axe.

Heero lined up the trunk and took his first swing. The axe blade glinted in the moonlight as it swung in a perfect arc towards the trunk – and bounced right off.

"Shit!" Duo exclaimed as the axe bounced off the trunk and clean out of Heero's hands, sailing through the air and embedding itself in the trunk of the tree he was hiding next to. "Fuck, that was close," Duo commented turning to look at the axe that was sitting mere centimeters from his head. Pulling it out, he handed it back to a surprised Heero. "Better luck next time?" he offered.

"Hn." Heero took the axe, planted his feet, tightened his grip and with a grunt, swung the axe again.

This time the blade hit the trunk hard, the vibrations traveling along the handle, up Heero's arm and rattling the ex pilot's teeth in his jaw. When his eyeballs had stopped jumping in their sockets, Heero bent to examine the trunk where he'd hit it. There was just a tiny mark.

"What happened to that superior strength of yours?" Duo questioned as he too examined the tree trunk and noted the pathetic dent in the bark.

"Hn. Stand back," Heero ordered. Duo took shelter behind a clump of rocks. Heero pulled off his mittens, spat on his palms, rubbed them together and grasped the handle of the axe. "Hn," he told the tree. "Hn," he told the axe as he brought it back in the air. "HN!" he cried out and swung the blade.

Watching from behind the safety of the rocks, Duo couldn't help but be impressed with the speed that Heero moved at. The man became a blur of movement, axe swinging back and forth, raining blow after blow against the trunk of the tree. Five minutes later and Heero lay flat on his back in the snow, gasping for air, the axe lay beside him and the tree still stood defiantly upright with minimal dents in its bark.

Duo scratched his head as he walked around the tree. "I don't understand it," he muttered, "It should be chopped down by now. Maybe you're not doing it right."

Rolling over in the snow, Heero managed to get to his feet. "Here," he said thrusting the axe at Duo. "You're so fucking smart, you chop it down. I give up." Heero stalked off to sit on the clump of rocks and glower at the tree.

Duo shrugged and fiddled in his pocket for a moment. Extracting something, he dug under the snow at the base of the tree, placed the item there and then ran like hell towards Heero. "Fire in the hole! Duck!" he yelled as he leapt over the rocks to hide behind them.

Heero didn't stand a chance. One minute his lover was flying through the air to hide behind him amongst the rocks screaming 'Fire in the hole! Duck', the next there was an almighty 'BOOM', Heero finding himself blown backwards and through the rocks whilst sods of turf, dirt, and the odd bough rained down on him.

Coughing as the air began to clear around him, Heero sat up and took stock of his body. He was covered in dirt and grime, his back hurt from where he'd connected with the rocks and his head was aching from where a low flying bough had thumped him. He glanced around for his lover; Duo was scrambling over the rocks and seemingly completely unaffected by the explosion. Wearily, Heero dragged himself to his feet and towards where Duo was standing scratching his head again.

"Have you got nits again?" Heero asked when he came to a stop beside his lover. "Because if you have I flatly refuse to wash that lot with the nit shampoo and listen to you whine like a baby."

Duo scowled. "No, I haven't."

"Then why are you scratching?"

"I'm trying to figure out what went wrong." Duo pointed to the tree that still stood defiantly in the ground. A large crater surrounded it, the root system exposed but still clinging desperately to the earth. A few lower limbs were missing and the remaining ones looked a little worse for wear, but the tree remained upright.

Suddenly there was a blaze of light and the sound of rotor blades. Both men looked up to see the police helicopter coming over the tops of the trees, searchlight panning around.

"Errr, exit, stage left," Duo called out and snagging the arm of Heero's parker, he hauled them out of the clearing and back into the dense foliage of the woods.

# # #

"It's still not as good as the one I found," Duo grumbled.

"Who cares, it was purchased legally, it's a damn tree and didn't cost an arm, leg or any other body part to obtain," Heero shot back and twisted back around to continue dabbing antiseptic on several cuts to his lower back.

Ignoring his lover, Duo continued to grumble. "I still say it was a complete rip off what that guy charged for it. It's hardly got any branches to it." The tree stood in a small pot in the corner of the lounge room. It wasn't the best specimen of a pine tree by any means with a thin trunk and spindly boughs, many of which were sparsely populated with pine needles. "It doesn't even smell like a pine tree."

Heero had to agree with that, the tree definitely had a sort of rotting wood and decaying pine scent to it, but there was no way he was going to admit to it. They had a damn tree and that's all that mattered.

"I hope it will stand up to the decorations," Duo said as he studied the innocent tree.

Decorations? "Ummm, what exactly are you planning on putting on it?" Heero asked, capping the antiseptic and shrugging back into his shirt.

Duo shrugged. "Oh, just the usual type of things, baubles, tinsel, candy canes, lights, you know." Duo left, returning after several minutes with a large box which he set on the floor. Opening the top, he fished around inside and began to pull out several smaller boxes.

Heero's curiosity got the better of him and he sauntered over to see what his lover was up to. "Shit, where did you get all that stuff?"

"Yard sales mostly," Duo replied absently as he continued to unpack boxes.

Heero gazed at the numerous boxes that contained all one would need to decorate a fully foliaged tree of eight feet. He glanced to their tree standing all of three feet with gaps of around a foot between the limbs. Good luck, he wished the tree mentally.

The tree didn't say anything, it just dropped a few pine needles onto the carpet.

"Here, Heero, check these for me will you?" Duo asked as he tossed a bunch of cable with lights attached towards his partner.

Catching them, Heero gave them a look over. "How?"

"Unravel the damn things and then check that each socket has a globe in it."

"Okay."

#

"Doesn't it look great?"

Heero gave the tree a worried look. Duo had decorated it with all the baubles, tinsel and anything else he could find. Right now the boughs were drooping very low and the entire tree was in danger of either collapsing or having the limbs snap off. "Hn."

"Come on, all we gotta do now is turn the lights on." Heero looked up to where the lounge room light shone brightly. "The tree lights, Heero," Duo clarified with a roll of his eyes. "Here, you do the honors." Duo pushed the switch which was connected to the power point and lights by a cord into Heero's hands. "On the count of three. One... Two... Three..."

When Duo said 'Three', Heero flipped the switch.

There was a blinding flash, a sort of fizzing sound, a sudden scream from Heero and all the lights went out.

Duo grabbed a flashlight and turned it on. "Heero? Heero, you okay?" He shone the beam directly where Heero still stood, the switch in his hand, hair stuck out at all angles and smoking slightly. Beneath his feet the carpet looked a little on the black and crispy side.

# # #

"I don't know, Duo," Heero said dubiously.

"Jeeze, Heero, we're only going to the mall to browse for Christmas presents, there's nothing dangerous about that," Duo replied.

"There shouldn't have been anything dangerous about decorating a tree either, but look what happened there," Heero snipped.

"I know and I've apologized several times already for that. The doc did say your hair will grow back properly and the flash burns were only superficial."

"Hn." Heero fiddled with a stubby lock of his singed hair.

"Come on, Heero," Duo wheedled. "What could possibly happen buying Christmas presents?"

Heero had his doubts and against his better judgment, he allowed Duo to drag him to the local mall.

#

"See, nothing at all remotely dangerous," Duo said with a wide grin as he opened his arms and twirled around in the middle of the mall. Heero opted to glower, there were far too many people around for his liking, but he kept his objections to himself.

After an hour of browsing around the stores, Heero felt as if his brain was disintegrating and his feet falling off. Duo's enthusiasm hadn't waned though and despite the numerous items they had already perused, they were yet to purchase any potential presents for their close friends.

Walking out of another store without having made a purchase, Heero was beginning to wish he'd stayed home and done his shopping on line when out of the corner of his eye something caught his attention.

Duo was rambling on about a couple of things he thought might suit Trowa and Quatre and didn't realize that Heero was no longer with him. "I think we should get that book on the history of the pre-colony circus for Trowa. What do you think, Heero?" Duo turned to look at his partner, only he wasn't there. "Heero?" Duo began to scan around when a small crowd to one side captured his attention. Then an unmistakable voice was heard.

"Put her down you pedophile."

"Fuck! Heero," Duo muttered to himself and took off running towards the fast increasing crowd. Several burly security guards were also racing towards the crowd. Reaching the throng, Duo, alongside the security guards, managed to elbow his way through the mass to the front where he froze. Right in front of him stood Santa's grotto and just inside was Santa's chair with a terrified looking Santa sitting in said chair, a young girl of around five sitting on his lap. Just behind Santa, stood Heero, one arm wrapped around Santa's neck whilst the other hand had pulled one of Santa's behind him.

"I said, put her down you pedophile," Heero growled again.

Shaking, Santa allowed the girl to hop off his lap and she happily ran across to her mother.

"Freeze!" shouted one of the security guards.

Heero turned his head slightly to take in the security guards. "Aa, re-enforcements," he said and went to address the security. "About time you – oof!"

The moment that Heero's attention was on the guards and not Santa, the four security guards all jumped him.

#

"Thank you for explaining things, Mr. Maxwell, although it really doesn't excuse your partner from scaring the living daylights out of the customers, not to mention poor Santa," the head security guard said as he shook Duo's hand.

"I know," Duo replied, "and I sincerely hope that Santa recovers from his heart attack in time for Christmas. If you can let me know which hospital they took him to, I think it would be nice to pay him a visit."

The guard looked at Heero. "I don't think that would be a good idea."

"Maybe some flowers then," Duo conceded. "Well, we'd best be getting along. Thank you officer." Grabbing Heero's arm, Duo dragged his lover out of the security office and back into the mall. "Heero, what the hell were you thinking? You don't go around pulling a stunt like that on Santa."

Heero crossed his arms over his chest. "He was molesting that girl," he stubbornly replied.

"Heero," Duo sighed, "Santa sometimes has to pick up the children to sit on his lap so they can tell him what they want for Christmas."

"That's exactly what he would say," Heero snorted. "He picks them up, gets in a quick grope, sits them on his lap and who knows what else he gets up to while they're sitting there."

"For the last time, Heero, Santa is not a pedophile, he's a harmless, elderly man who finds out if a child has been good or bad and what they want for Christmas so he can bring it to them on Christmas eve."

Heero still didn't look convinced.

Duo shook his head. "Forget it, Heero and come on, I think we'll skip the presents and maybe get those on line. We still need to get cards, Christmas stockings, the food and some crackers though."

"I still say he's a pedophile," Heero muttered under his breath as he followed his lover back into the mall.

# # #

"What's that?" Heero asked, watching Duo put another item into their cart.

"Mince pies," Duo replied. "Ah, Christmas pudding," he continued as he grabbed another item off the shelf.

Looking at the volume of food their cart currently contained, Heero couldn't help but frown. There was no way they would eat all of that!

"Just need a turkey now and I think that's it for the food," Duo stated and walked off to where the fresh poultry section was located.

There's more? Heero thought as he pushed the cart after his lover. He was seriously beginning to doubt if the trolley would be able to handle anything else in it, already the wheels were making some funny noises. Noting Duo looking over the many 'birds' on display, Heero let his attention wander over the crowd. A few people were gathered around what looked like a demonstration area. Curiously, Heero pushed the cart over to see what was going on.

A woman was dressed in a chef's uniform and standing behind a bench, as she demonstrated something on the bench so she was explaining her actions to the crowd . Unable to resist, Heero pressed closer.

On the bench sat a turkey carcass – a freshly plucked turkey carcass.

"As you can see, ladies and gentlemen, the innards do come away quite easily," the chef said as she withdrew her hand from inside the bird, a pile of entrails that were in said hand were quickly tossed into a waiting bucket.

Heero's stomach began to protest and he turned a little green.

"Once you have washed the carcass out you can stuff it with the prepared stuffing." The chef picked up a handful of stuffing and proceeded to shove it through the hole and into the cavity.

"Yuk, that's so gross," Heero muttered.

"What's gross?" Duo asked, appearing beside Heero.

"That," Heero said with a nod of his head towards the chef.

Duo looked in the direction Heero nodded. "Ah, shoving the stuffing up the turkey's ass," Duo stated matter-of-factly.

"I think I'm gonna be sick."

Turning back to his lover, Duo noted how Heero seemed a little 'off' and an evil glint appeared in his eye. He leaned closer to whisper in Heero's ear. "Watching that has given me an idea. Wanna try fisting when we get home?"

"Omae o korosu."

# # #

"I think there's a large enough selection in that pack," Duo said as he handed Heero a box of assorted Christmas cards.

Heero took the offered box and looked at it. "What do you plan on doing with them?"

"We write in them and send to our friends," Duo patiently replied as he led them through the store to where the bon bons and table decorations were.

"Duo, there's fifty cards in here." At the raise of Duo's eyebrow, Heero elaborated. "We don't have fifty friends."

"The rate this Christmas is going we'll be lucky to have five by the end of it," Duo muttered. "Heero, we don't need to have fifty friends to send to, we simply write out cards to however many friends we do have."

"But, that's a waste, there will be at least thirty to forty cards left over; we only have around ten friends to send to."

"Speak for yourself."

"Pardon?"

"I said, we can put the ones we don't use away for next year, that way we won't have to shop for cards next year, we can use what's left of these."

That made more sense to Heero. "Sounds logical."

With Heero still absorbed in the box of cards, Duo began to look along the shelves for the Christmas crackers.

*BANG... BANG...*

"Everybody down!" Heero ordered, dropping the box of Christmas cards and pulling out his gun, waving it around as his eyes scoped out the area for the terrorist.

Women screamed, babies cried and people scattered in all directions.

Locating the source of the shots, Heero sprang around the end of the aisle, gun drawn and pointed ahead as he lined up his target. "Drop your weapon and freeze!" he yelled.

A terrified boy of around seven dropped the cracker to the ground and raised his trembling hands into the air. "I was gonna pay for it, honest," his little voice wavered.

# # #

"Maxwell, Yuy?"

"That's us, officer," Duo replied and stood up from the small cot to walk across the cell and stare out the bars at the police officer. Heero remained sitting on the cot.

Placing a key in the lock, the officer opened the cell door. "Come on, you made bail," he informed them both.

"We did?"

"Yes. A Quatre Winner posted bail for both of you. Now, if you will follow me there's some paperwork that needs to be dealt with before you will be free to leave with Mr. Winner."

"Thanks, Quatre, we owe you one," Duo said as the three of them stepped out of the police station.

"No problem, Duo, glad to help out." Quatre turned his eyes to Heero. "What I do want to know is; what the hell did you think you were doing pulling a gun on a seven year old and in a crowded mall of all places?!" he demanded.

"I was protecting the public and keeping the peace," Heero defended.

"He had a Christmas cracker!"

"I didn't know that. It sounded like gunshots to me," Heero snipped.

"Death by Christmas cracker, now that's a new one," Duo snickered.

"I really don't think it's all that funny, Duo. Someone could have been seriously hurt," Quatre said, rounding on the braided man.

"And I really don't see how anyone could be seriously injured by a Christmas cracker, unless the little toy inside suddenly developed unnatural powers to enable it to zoom through the air and maybe collect someone in the eye," Duo replied and then stopped to think for a minute. "Oh, you could be right, if you tried to beat someone up with one there's the risk of getting a paper cut which in turn could get infected and cause gangrene to set in which would result in the amputation of the affected limb if not death from the disease itself. Then there's those gaudy, colored paper hats which would be enough to make anyone want to commit suicide..."

Quatre threw his hands up in the air. "I give up!" he shouted.

Heero looked suitably impressed with Duo's little comeback.

"Come on, I'll take you back to the mall to collect your car," Quatre muttered and stalked off to where his own car awaited.

# # #

Christmas morning had dawned bright and clear. During the afternoon a light snowfall had passed through and a fresh powdering of snow lay over the landscape, untouched by human presence. Inside the Maxwell/Yuy residence a log fire burned brightly, warming the entire house with its heat and sending a subtle aroma of cherry wood though the dwelling.

"Merry Christmas, Heero," Duo said and sat on the couch next to his partner.

"Merry Christmas, Duo," Heero returned and sat back on the couch. They snuggled up close, sharing the warmth of their respective bodies. Heero draped an arm around Duo's shoulders, Duo resting his head against Heero's chest and stared into the flames.

"It's been a tiring day," Duo said with a yawn.

"Hai, it has."

Unable to hold his curiosity any longer, Duo shifted slightly and gazed into his lover's eyes. "How was your first 'real' Christmas, Heero?"

Before answering, Heero thought back over the past few days. He glanced across at their little tree, branches looking a bit on the scorched side, almost completely bare of any pine needles and the bottom boughs sagging to touch the ground with the weight of the adornments. The small star on the top listed drunkenly to one side. The fairy lights scattered amongst the branches were not lit, but they still managed to twinkle in the firelight, despite several of them being melted together.

Lunch had consisted of turkey sandwiches. Pressed turkey sandwiches as the little grocery store down the block didn't stock much in the way of festive fare and what it did have had already been sold out.

Their friends had at least received a Christmas card, along with the promise of a gift just as soon as they were able to purchase them.

Heero wondered just how long they would remain banned from the local shopping mall.

"I know we had a few hiccups in there, but I did promise you a Christmas you'll never forget."

"That you did." Heero leaned in to kiss his lover. "Despite all the mishaps, it was a Christmas to remember, Duo, one I will not forget in a hurry," he added wryly.

Duo gave a lopsided smile and cuddled closer.

The soft sounds of carols drifted to their ears. "Did you put the stereo on?" Heero asked.

"No," Duo replied as he lifted his head and inclined it slightly to listen better. Frowning, he stood up and moved towards the window, Heero following right behind him. He pulled the curtains back a touch and glanced through the glass and into the front yard. "Carol singers," he stated with a smile.

"Oh, fuck," Heero muttered as he peered over Duo's shoulder.

"What?" Duo turned to his lover.

"They're in the front yard."

"I can see that, Heero."

"I've set all the alarms and booby traps."

"Shit!"

One poor, unsuspecting carol singer shifted their weight from one foot to another and in the process managed to step on a pressure plate hidden beneath the snow. Immediately the yard was lit up with a blinding white search light, an alarm began to shriek madly followed by a voice demanding the intruder freeze and put their hands in the air.

"You think Quatre will mind some company tonight?" Duo asked as he took off running through the house, grabbing his parker and keys, shoving his feet into his boots at the same time. In the distance the wail of police sirens could be heard.

"How can he object?" Heero called out, grabbing his own jacket and shoes, following his lover outside and into the dark of the evening. "It's the festive season after all, good will to man and all that crap."

~ Owari ~