What do you do when you have to decide between the person you truly love, and the person that your friends and parents love and accept? Who do you choose?

Of course, the answer should obviously be the one you love. But again, it's not that easy. What if your father was a homophobic bastard with an abusive streak and your friends hated the person you liked. Would you choose to be accepted and loved by most everyone, or loved by the person the really mattered?

Sometimes life's choices were not so easy.

LINE BREAK

The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread. ~Mother Teresa

Dean was loved by everyone. He was popular, but he was not a dick about it, and he was downright stunning. All the girls swooned over him and all the guys wanted to be him. There was only one exception to this 'everyone', and that was Castiel Novak.

The quiet kid who always sat in the back of the class. He always wore skin tight skinny jeans and some kind of band shirt, normally something pertaining to heavy metal or post-hardcore. His hair was messy and falling into his eyes, stubble gracing his cheeks and chin.

He himself was gorgeous, but in the way that no one really took any notice of because of his reputation of being the freak.

No one really ever talked to Castiel. No one waved or nodded politely when walking from class to class. It was as if Castiel Novak did not even exist at school. And sometimes it got lonely.

It was a Friday afternoon, and everyone was coming from their sixth period when Dean and Castiel's lives would change…for better and for worse.

LINE BREAK*

Chapter 1

"Alright people, get your stuff and get up…we have a new seating chart!"

All the students groaned in unison at the mention of a new seating chart. Ms. Peterson was always changing it around. It got aggravating.

"Oh come on, it's not like I am lining you all up for execution. It's just a little change in plans!"

A chubby kid in the back snorted, "Yeah for like, the hundredth time!"

` Ms. Peterson just ignored the comment and started calling off names and where they would sit. "Dean Winchester and Castiel Novak lab table twelve."

Castiel slowly went to the seat that he was assigned, keeping his head lowered and shoulders hunched, as if he were trying to hide from the world.

Dean's friend elbowed him in the ribs, "Hey man, good luck sitting with that nut-case…rumor has it that he's a fag, so try not to get raped while you're at it."

Dean glared at his friend, "Thanks for the warning Alistair, but I think I can handle it. Anyway, I think you're sitting by Becky Rosen, the chick who stalks Chuck for a living. You're the one that should be careful…she might switch her sights on you."

At the mention of Becky, Alistair grimaced and scrunched his nose like he had just gotten a whiff of something foul-smelling. "Yeah, good point. Hey, I'll watch your back if you watch mine?"

Dean just shook his head and chuckled, "I'll watch your back, man. But I don't need anyone watching mine. I can handle myself."

Alistair shrugged then walked over to where the squirrelly girl with dirty-blond hair and squinty blue eyes was sitting. Good luck! Dean mouthed over to him, and then he made his way over to the hunched person sitting at lab twelve.

Dean dropped his stuff and sat in the stool next to Castiel. "Hi, I'm Dean. You're Castiel, right?"

Castiel's answer was a nod, and then sinking down even lower in his chair. The poor kid looked frightened and aggravated at the same time. Which Dean found odd, because he hadn't done anything to him…not that he could remember anyway.

"Um…well, hi." Dean said nervously.

Castiel raised his head and turned to glare at Dean. At the sight of those big, round celestial blue eyes, Dean gasped. They were beautiful. Wait, what? Beautiful? Since when have I ever thought a guy had beautiful eyes? Dean quickly looked down away from those eyes. Unfortunately, that brought his lips to attention. At the sight of them, Dean had the sudden urge to grab Castiel and kiss him.

What the hell is wrong with me! I am not a homo…why am I thinking like one? Dean started to internally panic. He had no idea where to look at Castiel. If he looked up, he saw his messy, raven-colored hair…which made him think about how it would feel to run his fingers through the silky strands. If he looked down…well, the skinny jeans that Castiel was wearing were tight in all the right places…so that wasn't an option…

Dean's brain was officially in panic mode.

"Look…I don't want this anymore than you, okay. So please, let's try to get through this without talking to each other. I'd rather not deal with any shit." Dean's thoughts were broken by his voice… His voice! Damn, if that wasn't the voice of sex and seduction, he didn't know what was. It wasn't until his head had cleared that he realized what Castiel just said.

"Uh…sorry, what?"

Castiel just rolled his eyes and shook his head, "I said I don't want to have to deal with your bull shit. I don't want to have to deal with you… you pompous asshole!"

Dean just stared at the boy in shock. The kid didn't even know him, how could he judge him like that? "What the fuck dude! You don't even know me! How would you know if I was an asshole…we have never even met!"

Castiel glared at Dean again, "I don't have to know you, your reputation precedes you."

Dean just shook his head. How could this beautiful person be such a dick. But I guess that's just the way it goes…nice on the outside, ugly on this inside…

By the time Ms. Peterson put everyone in their assigned seat, the bell rang for the end of the day. Castiel gave Dean one last glare before sliding off of the stool and walking away.

And even though Dean now disliked Castiel immensely, he couldn't help but notice the sensual sway in his hips as he walked away.

Line Break*

"Castiel! Where the hell have you been!" Castiel cringed when his mother's shout reached his ears. He could tell that she was already drunk. He carefully made his way into the kitchen where it sounded like she was in.

"Mother, I was at school, remember. Today is Friday…" The sight of his mother sickened him and made pitty well up inside him. She was a mess, as per usual. Her blonde curls were a tangled, dirty mess. Her skin was stained with different things, smudges of dirt and grime, maybe even some puke.

She turned around and slapped Castiel hard across the face. He licked his lip and tasted blood. She had busted his lip….again. "Don't you dare act like you are better than me, boy! I am your mother and you must respect me! You are no better than your father! Oh, he was so charming at first all promises and fake dreams of a bright and loving future. But then he knocked me up with you and he left! That bastard left me to take care of his bastard child!"

She took a deep, seemingly calm breath, closing her eyes, and then opening them again. They seemed a bit brighter and friendlier than a minute ago. Castiel sighed with relief. At least it wasn't going to last as long as he figured it would. His mother laid a hand on his cheek. Her palms were smooth and warm, and the gesture almost seemed loving, until he noticed her eyes go dark with rage again.

Before he could even react, his mother slapped him harder than before. His head snapped to one side with the force of it. "YOU DISGUST ME! YOU ARE EXACTLY LIKE YOUR FUCKING FATHER! YOU HAVE HIS LOOKS AND HIS TRICKERY… GET OUT! GET OUT OF MY HOUSE, YOU BASTARD! GET….OUT!"

Castiel stood there stunned for a half second before slowly turning around and walking through the front door, closing it gently before running. Not knowing where, just running. This outburst was some of the worst he had seen in a while, and his mother had never told him to leave. He had gotten plenty to busted lips, but never had she yelled at him to leave like that. Maybe got to his room, or get out of her sight…but never leave.

Tears streamed down his face as Castiel kept running. He was just letting his feet take his away, and it wasn't until he had been running for a while did he notice where he was. It was the big green field that he had discovered years ago, It used to be his favorite place to go, to get away from the madness of his mother. But he hadn't been here for a couple years. Castiel was surprised to find himself in the middle of it.

As the tears resided some, he picked his way towards the middle of the rolling green grass. The blades of grass looked untouched, and they gently rubbed against his fingers, as if trying to sooth some of the pain.

Once he got to the very center of the field he stood. He just stood for a little while, looking over the small expanse of the field. But as he looked at the peaceful place, anger and jealousy began to bubble within him. Why can't my life be thins peaceful. Why can't my mother love and nourish me the way Mother Nature loves and nourishes these individual blades of grass. How can these insignificant little plants get more love from an invisible mother than I get from a real one!

Castiel violently tore at the grass, his anger becoming too much for him to keep inside. "WHAT HAVE I DONE WRONG! WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS!" Castiel shouted to the sky. He had stopped believing in a god long ago, but sometimes, when things got too hard to handle, he would resort to what he used to do. He would talk to a god that either did not exist, or did not care.

He calmed down after his outburst and breathed heavily. His anger slowly drained away, leaving only hurt, betrayal, and pain. Castiel sagged to the ground and began to cry. But not for himself; no, he cried for his poor, sick mother. He cried for her hurt and her pain. He cried for the injustice the world had done to her, the injustice his father had done to her. He cried for being a disappointment to her. But most of all he cried for not being able to be stronger, for not being able to stay with her and try and comfort her through her time of need.