This, Indeed, is a Very Merry Christmas
spacegypsy1
Timeline: After Unending
Daniel and Vala have decided to date. And suddenly, they're faced with untangling their true feelings.
~0i0~
The clicking of her heels along the corridor of the SGC alerted me to her approach and I stood up, waiting.
When she walked in I made an effort to keep my jaw from dropping. My chest tightened and I just stood still, looking at her. She's sexy. Funny. Brave. Smart. I'm so crazy about her and sometimes I don't know what to do.
She stopped, that big grin of hers electric, her hands went to her hips and she pouted her glistening lips, a dark brow rose and she raised one shoulder slightly in question.
"You look great." I said.
"You don't think this..." She waved a hand towards a glitzy red and green hair clip. "...is too much?" Though she grinned I noticed a little uneasy tremble to her lips.
I moved closer. "Not too much. And certainly to be expected. It's Christmas." I kissed her cheek, took her by the elbow and guided her closer still, almost touching, wanting to kiss her fully, but we hadn't really crossed that threshold.
Pulling back she flicked the earrings she wore. "And the light up earrings?"
"Perfect." I whispered, knowing the grin on my face was goofy but I couldn't stop grinning at her.
"And the dress?" She twisted to and fro, relaxing a bit more and becoming more playful.
My gaze drifted to the black, sparkly, figure fitting dress that left her long legs showing, encased in black fishnet stockings that disappeared into the ankle high black, spiked heel boots. Eyes coming back to her face I focused on her ruby lips.
"Daniel?"
"Hmmm? Oh, right. Yes. The dress is very festive."
Vala blinked, grinned and asked, "Are you wearing that?"
I wasn't sure how to react. "Ah, yeah, why?"
"Nothing. It's nice." Her tone said anything but 'nice'.
"What should I wear?"
"Weellll, that lovely eye matching blue shirt of yours would be much better than brown plaid."
"Okay. I'll just go change."
"Okay."
When I returned she was sitting on the side of my desk, legs swinging. "Oh, darling you look so handsome."
Uncomfortable with her compliment I bypassed a response and slipped on my leather jacket."Ready?" When she didn't answer I looked up. "What? Not this jacket?"
She jumped off the desk. "No, the jacket's great. So. I guess we should go."
With a huff of breath I took my glasses off and massaged the bridge of my nose. She'd been very excited about going to this party. At least until I asked her to be my date. Maybe she isn't interested in me in that way. Or. Maybe, I'm over thinking this. I need to know."Okay, what's wrong?"
"Wrong? Nothing is..."
"Come on, tell me."
Her shoulders sagged. "Fine. It's our first actual date. In front of friends and co-workers. As a couple. It's our coming out of the closet, so to speak. What will they think when they see us together? I mean, us really acting togetherish. What do we do when we get there? How do we act? Do we just blurt out.. 'hey, we're dating'?"
It's not often anyone gets to see Vala Mal Doran vulnerable. I relaxed; a bit intrigued that she was worried about what people think. That's a new twist to the ever changing Vala.
"I think," I told her, "that anyone with eyes and half a brain can see that we care about each other. Going to the SGC Christmas party, together, as two people who have decided to date will be obvious. I think they all anticipated that maybe one day we would date. How many times have you heard Teal'c say we're meant to be together?" Feeling as though I might be getting in too deep I jerked my head towards the door, tucked my hands into my pockets and turned to one side, elbow out.
She hooked her arm through mine. I love the way she does that. As we headed out she was quiet. Very unusual for Vala. My insecurity about her started to rise but I pressed it down. Things had changed between us. No, not changed. Something new had emerged.
~0i0~
We weren't in the car ten minutes when she turned off the radio.
"Hey," I took a quick look at her then back to the road. "I thought you wanted to listen to Christmas music."
"I do. Just not that one. The one with the 'tiny tots with eyes all aglow'."
"Oh. Right." Silence filled the car for a long time. Finally, I took a breath and blurted out, "You're nervous. I can tell. What's really bothering you?"
"No. Not…"
"I thought we decided to be fully honest with each other."
"Yes." She was fidgeting.
"Yes honest, or yes nervous?"
"Yes and yes."
"Can you elaborate?"
Her breath came out in a huff and she spoke as fast as I have ever heard her. "I can't explain it. This confusion about us. And then if we go to this as a couple there's so much expectation and I don't really know how you feel about this us so until I do I can't know how much feeling I can let loose. There. Honest enough?"
I kept my eyes on the road with great effort. "Maybe I haven't always treated you well. And I'm sorry for that. Maybe it was because you scared the hell out of me from the moment we met. I've never acknowledged how I feel about you to myself, much less to you."
"It's snowing, Daniel."
"That it is. Stop distracting me by changing the subject."
"What is the subject?"
"You. Vala. The subject is you."
She turned on the radio. "I only wanted to point out that it was snowing and actually, Daniel, the subject is you. You were talking about your feelings. Right?"
"Right." Without hesitating I made a cautious look behind me and then turned the car around.
"Where are you going?" She asked with surprise.
"Home." I heard her gasp.
"Oh? Not to the party?" Her words had been spoken barely above a soft breath.
I could only answer, "Not to the party," as I tried to find the courage to express my feelings.
She scanned the radio channels, turned the volume down very low, sighed deeply, and closed her eyes.
We didn't speak. Christmas music thrummed in the background. Snow drifted with a soft tick.
Not a word was spoken as I parked the car, as we got on the elevator, as we entered my apartment.
Standing in the middle of my living room, looking out the glass doors at the snow, Vala quietly standing behind me, I tried to make sense of what was happening.
Then, as if catapulted from years of regrets, and holding back my feelings I suddenly turned towards her and found myself rushing words out.
"I know I haven't acted like I care for you. But that's all in the past. I don't want to lose you, or what we might be able to build together. I never want to feel that sickening feeling in my gut when I think I've lost you and I never told you how much I do care. It's taken me a while to admit that. But I do care, Vala. About you, I care very much. Very, very much. And, so, I'd like to be committed. To you."
Vala grinned, took a few steps closer to me. "Are you telling me, darling, that you're Christmas present to me is you?"
"Yes." I kissed her then. A kiss full of wanting, love, and one that I only stopped because I was completely out of breath. "And," I whispered against her ear as my hand found its way inside her coat to rest against the sparkly dress just below her breast. "I really hope you won't re-gift me, but if you do I will always be your friend."
Vala laughed, tossed her raven curls back, and then threw her arms around my neck. Her voice was deep, raspy, sexy beyond words. "I know what re-gift means. And I see why you were a bit reluctant. Because in my varied and wild past with you I may have, well, seemed a bit relationship challenged. But, Daniel, my love, I've loved you for quite some time, and just recently come to the startling conclusion that I truly love only you in a way I have never loved before and I would do anything to be by your side forever and ever…"
My mouth latched feverishly onto hers.
Somewhere in the zealous kiss, I chanted the words 'I love you'. She responded in kind. My hand, at last, explored the softness of her breasts, moving from one to the other. Her fingers teased my neck. I tried so hard to stop kissing her so I could get her coat off. She, of course, managed to get my coat off. She's such a good little thief. I couldn't resist the need to take her incredible rear end into my hands and pull her against that part of me that was on fire for her. I was rewarded with a delightful moan.
The ring of my phone actually startled me and I jumped. Vala burst out laughing.
"Daniel. Maybe you should answer the phone. It could be important."
"I doubt that."
"You know," she said as she kissed my neck, making me crazy. "It's one of them wondering where we are. What we're doing."
"You want me to answer it?" I asked, incredulous.
"They won't give up. And I don't want any interruptions." She shoved me away and raised a brow. Waiting.
I answered, hitting the speaker for Vala's benefit. "What?"
"Where are you and Vala Mal Doran?"
"At my apartment."
"What are you doing?"
"Kissing."
There was silence for a moment. Vala leaned over the phone. "Merry Christmas, Muscles."
"This, indeed, is a very Merry Christmas. Good night."
~END~