A/N: OK I'm not good at beginnings bear with me please! And anyways I'll introduce you the him later. You'll understand when you read the story, I'll try to actually finish this story and any un positive comments you want to make don't, inbox me. People might think if I have un positive comments they wont read. So please review positive comment, enjoy and I'll shut up now.

Ch.1

Hell

My head throbbed from the loud music pumping in my ears and having to drink to much liquor. I looked down at my wrists that were drenched in my blood hot tears were flowing freely down my cheek. I've done it again, one more boyfriend given up on me. I'm sick of trusting people, always telling you lies saying how they're different and that they love you, trust them. I chuckled as I thought about all the lies I've heard from all of them. This is why I don't have friends, I only need to get hurt once at a time, friends are just a waste of time, I have no need of these so called friends. All they're gonna do is stab you in the back. That's just what I need a stab in the back and the heart.

I looked at my left wrist…well arm that's covered in scars of my previous cuts. It feels like over a hundred, but I don't pay attention to it, I don't count them I just do it, I'm not sure why but its been the first thing I do every time I'm upset.

Anger started to build up inside of me, I threw the pillows across the room and punched the wall, and more tears came flowing down. I actually thought this guy was different from everyone else, but I was wrong he ended up like all of my ex boyfriends. Who could ever love me? I'm just an emo psychotic bitch right? My wrist started throbbing and more blood started coming out. More tears started pouring.

And what's funny is that I don't even know why I'm upset about it. We didn't have anything in common except for the same taste in music and that's it. But why do I still want him? I never got those stupid butterflies with him. We never kissed, never had sex so why am I acting like this? Why did he make me happy but so sad at the same time? I always cried over him, he would always say the wrong things and treated me as if I was just his stupid buddy and I hated it. But a part of me misses him but another part makes me happy that it is over. Well now I don't have to pretend like every thing is OK and expect him to be there anymore. What hurts now is that I'm lost, I have no clue what to do anymore. He was always around me when class was over he would be right there at the door waiting and smiling. I miss that, I rolled over on my side with tears still flowing and fell asleep. Hoping maybe one day I can be happy again.

I woke up with a huge migraine I thought about just skipping school, but then it would show him that I was weak. I am not weak…well I am but I really don't need him to know that now do I?

I slowly got out of bed and went to get some aspirin, I wasn't good with medicine but I didn't care if it killed me if I took one too many. I just cared about relieving pain right now.

I noticed the fresh new scars on my both of my wrists; they looked deeper than last time since they look worse than the older ones. Whatever not like anyone cares. The tears started falling again, I bit my lower lip preventing them. No luck they poured down again,

Why does my life have to be hell?

I don't have parents to take care of me. A few years ago when I was fifteen I ran away from hell.

I'm actually happier here than I was where I use to live; I would've killed myself if I stayed. My parents were quiet contempt with me gone; heck they send me money for me to stay here! Which makes me one happy seventeen year old, well sort of.

Anyways my name is Kioshi Hana Chokichi, Kioshi means quiet, Hana meant beautiful or something.

I was usually picked on for the name Kioshi since I would never talk to anyone…ever. So yeah I was pretty pisst off about it and it didn't help the fact that I'm half Japanese (mum's side) and half Britain (clearly dad's side.) So I was picked on for that since it's rare to have that type of mix in the most elite school in Kana.

I was beaten as a child by bullies and by my parents. My parents never wanted a child but granny changed their opinion. She offered that I would be the slave, so I was treated like a slave.

I didn't have cute clothes like the girls in my class did; I wore the clothes my mother would find in the trash.

I didn't run away sooner because I thought it might've gotten better if I stayed for while, it didn't. So I finally decided to run away when my father tried to kill me for being a smartass towards him, so I ran to Konoha.

It's located in somewhere where a bunch of trees are. It was pretty difficult to find with all the trees. Guess they didn't name it valley hidden in the leaves for nothing. So here I am living on my own, with no friends, no boyfriends, no one at all. Alone.

I washed my face, there were tears stains on my face and I needed to cool down.

I got dressed in a Linkin Park t-shirt with black skinnies and black all stars hi-tops. I put my black dinosaur jacket on; it has pink spikes on the hood. I straightened my hair since it got all messy last night, my hair is naturally straight until I go to bed then I just look like Hermione Granger from "Harry Potter" in her first year.

I put brown eye shadow on with black on top to give it a gothic look, then I put red lipstick on, foundation and done.

I grabbed my bag and helmet and went downstairs when I opened the door I felt a gush of air hit my face. 'Just great it's windy, good thing I brought my gloves.' I hopped on my motorcycle and left to Konoha high.

I sat in my usual spot the moment I walked in the classroom, in the very back in the corner alone, just how I like it.

I started drawing a broken bleeding heart in a box with a bunch of chains around it. My favorite part of this spot was how the lights hits my desk cause its not to bright but it's bright enough for me to do my work, draw, write music etc.

I never got in trouble for being off task since nobody comes back here, which is weird since people are supposed to sit back here, its not like I'm complaining, I'm pretty contempt with having the whole space to myself.

Our seats are connected (the classroom is just like the one in Naruto.) But today I felt a presence next to me; I ignored the person hoping they would move away from me, but no luck. I turned my head to the left there was someone new.

He looked different from everyone here, I looked at his notebook which said 'Gaara'

"May I help you?" his voice was low and raspy and it sent chills down my spine. I looked up at him and shook my head I pressed my back against the wall and lifted my feet on the seat

"Could you move?" I said in a probably bitchy voice. He glared at me "no" I rolled my eyes and saw a blond girl stand in front of Gaara.

"Uh…hi your new aren't you?"

"Clearly I am since I haven't been here before" she ignored the rude remark, which I found funny.

"I'm Hana Choni and I was…uh wondering if you…um…would like to take a um tour with me?" Gaara groaned

"Is this really a date?" Hana's face turned bright red and she started to fiddle with her fingers. Gaara was just writing in his notebook the whole time, which most people found rude.

"If you…uh want to" Gaara closed his eyes and the book, I knew he was rolling his eyes, since I do the same thing when I don't want to be rude. Which doesn't happen that often.

"No" it came out as a growl and I actually shivered physically from his voice. Her eye went huge as if she might cry and ran away, I let out a small, low chuckle. These girls are all the same they always go for the new guy, but I never knew it was going to be three weeks!

The girls and guys have been asking him out. This is just preposterous! At least he's not like most guys and gloat about being so popular, which I find quiet funny since he doesn't even, like anyone, he doesn't even have any friends! I rubbed my temples as I saw another person go up to Gaara and ask him out. Before he could answer for himself I snapped

"NO HE DOESN'T WANT TO! DON'T YOU GET IT? HE DOESN'T LIKE ANYONE HERE! SO STOP ASKING! ALL OF YOU! I'M SO SICK OF IT IS SOOO FUCKING ANNOYING! NOW GO THE FUCK AWAY!" I huffed and just at the same time the bell ran and I stormed out of there.

I went to the coffee shop and got changed into my uniform, black t-shirt, khakis, and a green apron with a coffee on the front. I tied my hair up in a ponytail and placed these realistic tattoo sleeves on so nobody can see the scars. I took out all of the earrings in my ear and got out to take some orders.

This was my favorite coffee shop, the coffee beans are home made, and there was live music and I was able to play some of mine. It was quiet, which was surprising since it was full of teenagers; they usually came here to concentrate on their homework. Or they were like me and needed to get away, either way it was perfect.

That was until I saw him at the front ready to order. I put on my fake best smile and walked out there as if nothing happened.

"Hello sir! What would you like today?" I hate this stupid fake smile it was hurting my face.

He ran his hand through his hair

"now you don't have to pretend that silly smile on your face. Now I'll be waiting at your place; I still have your key. Wear something slutty Kay? And hurry I don't like to be kept waiting"

"you broke up with me, you can just go home."

"Yeah but I miss you"

"you dumped me"

"yes I know but that's because everyone said I should-" I smacked him, that dumbass bitch! That was the reason!

"You should just leave right now." I growled

"Fine but I'll be waiting at your house, slutty clothes remember" I scowled at him as he left. And what makes my day even better is when Gaara was right behind him; he casually ordered a French vanilla coffee. There was this weird silence and I felt like I should explain.

"He's not my boyfriend by the way"

"I didn't ask"

"Well I'm… I just…can I stay with you?" he raised an eyebrow at me. "I just…he's gonna be there and…can I stay at your house?" he sighed

"No, why me where are your friends?"

"I never had any…free coffee…for a whole month!" he growled and a shiver went up my spine again.

"Make it two and we leave now and don't tell anyone" I nodded my head handed him my coffee and left. I told my boss that I wasn't feeling well which was technical true, I grabbed my stuff and left with Gaara. I wasn't going to ride my motorcycle, he knows what it is, I don't want to attract him.

"Wow nice house"

"Thanks" it was two stories, the living room was a beige color with crème colored couch and recliners, the carpet was white and they had a black flat screen T.V and a black coffee table.

The kitchen was just like any old kitchen white walls with white and black tiles for floors, I haven't seen the rest of the rooms except for his room

His walls are blood red, black comforter and white carpet; he has a T.V on his dresser, which is black. He has a couple of paintings of broken hearts, sort of like mine and a 'Sleeping with sirens' poster with a 'Linkin Park' poster on another wall.

"I like the room"

"Great 'cause you're staying here"

"Don't you have a sister?"

"Yeah but her boyfriend lives with her and I don't think you want to stay with Kankuro. I'll stay on the couch"

"No, no I will sleep on the couch, this is your home, I'll stay on the couch I insist." Gaara threw one of his shirts at me

"You can sleep in that until we get your clothes" I smiled

"Thanks" I went to his bathroom and got changed, I now smelt like Gaara which was intoxicating of pine trees and cologne, I decided to just wear the shirt since it goes above my knees. I went downstairs were the couch was all set up. I laid down and closed my eyes, going fast to sleep and feeling just a little bit happy.

A/N: Hey guys back! I know you love me. Anyways thanks for reading please read the more, I promise It'll get better. Beginnings are just not my forte, some people can relate, I know some of my friends do. Now please read I know the next chapter might be weird, maybe I'm weird so I'm not sure what's normal…anyways please review, add me as favorite author, follow, and favorite my story! And any requests I'll take! Now I'm gone I love you guys!

P.S: the jacket is from hot topic you want to see here's a link!

hottopic/Apparel/Hoodies/NoveltyHoodies/So+So+Happy+Siq+Girls+Zip+