Pilfered from a very close friend of mine who (darn him!) is also the singular cause why I'm writing fan fictions.
Bragging is Bad for Health
"My, my, Harry! You have succeeded a deed beyond my wildest expectations of you!" exclaimed Dumbledore with his wand in the hand that was supposed to be burnt beyond the ability of grasping an object, pointed at the ground. It could be acceptable as Voldemort's dead body was lying on the ground. "Congratulations, Harry!" He was smiling as he cast a cutting curse aimed at Harry's neck. It was a direct hit.
Harry felt the sticky, warm liquid leaking down his neck before anything else. He was confused and shocked, naturally, and could mouth but a word: 'Why?'
"I cannot express my gratitude for that question my boy; otherwise I would seem like an egotistical bastard having a monologue.
"Now why would I do this? As you know, I haven't been getting any younger, though certainly not older as the Philosopher's Stone serves far too well for its unassuming dimension and composition! Thus, I wasn't able to fight Lord Voldemort directly. There were other reasons, too, but I have to explain the first one. You see, I had to keep up appearances; the public at large expected me to grow old -consequently slower... How could I disappoint them and fight like a man in his prime? So I had to compensate with increasing the power of the spells I cast. It wasn't too much of a loss, let me tell you. Power and wisdom they've been expecting from me, so those are what they've seen.
"Then it was getting just a little bit senile- barmy some would say. That was the easiest part of my facade. The hardest part was to seem wise, omniscient, and benevolent. The benevolence, I could do as all I've ever wanted is the greater good, my boy, make no mistake. We will come to that part later. Omniscience, well, of all my actions and dealings in the past, that one required the most effort. I had to have a network of informants loyal only to me... We will have to postpone this part for now, too.
"You see, Lord Voldemort had to be destroyed; he was everything I despised. If I learned one thing in my whole life -which is a rather long one, I might add,- it is that this blood-purity idea the pure-blood wizards and witches harbor is the very thing that keep them from taking the place they rightly deserve. They think they are better than the muggles and muggle-borns just by being born into a long line of magic-user ancestors. That thought is dangerous as it promotes sloth, if anything. I think you have observed that particular fact in Draco Malfoy; though he was by no means more than an average wizard, he always thought he was better than, say, your 'friend' Hermione. Could someone in their right minds claim so? The ringleader of this school of thinking was Voldemort, so he had to die in order to accomplish what the greater good stood for.
"So, what exactly is the greater good? Why, my boy, it's that magic itself is what makes us superior to all the lesser beings. Not just the magic existing inside us, but the ability to wield it and bend it to our wills. You were such an exceptional wizard, Harry- it is a great shame you had to die.
"Now that you know 'the Greater Good,' I feel free to go on.
"You see, I thought by delivering you to the Dursleys, I would be able to make you understand my point. They were fallen as far as any sentient being could fall; ignorant, arrogant, holier-than-thou, bigoted... I could go on and on with this list, but you get my point. I thought I could alienate you from Muggles in general. After then, it was either Voldemort or my true self for you. But you persisted! It was mighty foolish of you, I have to say. You were just like the Weasleys, closing your eyes to the bad while overrating the goodness that were not even directed at you! You were blinder than the Weasleys, though; at least they see Muggles as 'fascinating creatures,' things to gaze upon in wonder just like an exotic animal. They are not ready yet, nevertheless, not yet.
"Then you came to Hogwarts- Deprived of childhood, belittled by Muggles, malnourished, under-appreciated... A slave by all means! Your first steps into the Wizarding World were with utter amazement, I would presume, but Hogwarts? Such magnificence, such brilliance! But you took it for granted! How I cursed your insistence to not see the truth right in front of your eyes!
"With this part, we have established the background.
"Your life in Hogwarts was a training oriented program; you had to solve puzzles, fight adversaries, face the public at its worse and so on, preparing you for this exact moment, this moment when you've killed the Dark Lord. I dearly wish I had another choice- alas, I did not. What of the prophecy, you might ask. Well, that was a rather ingenious play of mine. Trelawney was desperate at the time; I had something over her, and she had to do that one thing to avoid a disaster. She agreed to it. To keep up the appearance with Voldemort, I had to keep her 'protected.' So I hired her. As you know, Severus recited the first part of the prophecy to Voldemort as he was a loyal Death Eater at the time, am I right? Well, I am, but you are not. Severus was not, nor has he ever been, loyal to Voldemort. He did exactly as he was bid by me -do not look at me like that, my boy; so did you!
"The plot only thickens from now on; a masterpiece, if I may be so bold!
"The prophecy was worded like that with two reasons in mind; Voldemort had to take it seriously, and you had to believe in it. Voldemort is a predictable man like most power-driven people are. He wanted immortality, but more than that, he wanted to be second to none. An equal was unacceptable to him, thus co-existence was impossible. He looked for the prophesized child for a long time, and decided that it was you—not without a few pokes from certain someone we now know was loyal only to me.
"Now I can let you know who you are; and I think you will understand all my reasons for this 'atrocity.'"
"Lord Voldemort was not beyond human needs once; he had, shall we say, nightly companions. I have not any explicit information about his sexual life, but he had a rather wide selection. He impregnated a witch who, at one point, fell from his 'grace.' He did not know that the woman was carrying his own child. She bore the child, but could not bear the responsibility. She killed herself with a rather poisonous substance you might know from your potions classes as the 'Sweet Sleep.' She did not suffer. So you were born, Harry. I had leverage against Voldemort that I never had over anybody! Do you understand the magnitude of it?
"I planned how to exploit this for weeks until I came up with this plan. I placed you in the Potters' care- yes, they are not your parents. Do you catch the use of the present tense? They are not dead, as I believe you have concluded. They are none other than your friends Hermione and Ron. You now know why Ron has always been jealous of the riches you had; James likes his luxuries, and you were spending his very own money! You might wonder how they did it. Grangers never existed; 'Mr. and Mrs. Granger' you saw were only for your benefit. James and Lily's disguise was a rather impressive wand-work of mine. You never suspected a thing; then again, you had no reason to.
"Forgive me if I am jumping time-lines; as you have seen, it is rather intricate to tell in one single reason-cause chain.
"So when Voldemort tried to kill you, he was attacking his own child. There is a blurry subject in magic: blood magic. The details would be too long to tell in our limited time, so I will not bore you with them. In a nut-shell, you survived because you were his son and the heir apparent to the Slytherin line. So we came to this moment.
"I shall tell you of the things to come; it is of your doing, after all. Your biggest accomplishment is not going to be Voldemort's demise at your hands; it will be the future you helped me create. One generation of magic users perished in this war- Muggle-Lovers and Pure-Bloods killed each other. Old beliefs were shaken from their foundations. Such is the shockwave that this second war sent through our small community. Now new ideas can be fostered within the new generation whom I personally will be leading as the greatest surviving Hero of the war. In this new community, Muggles, Magical-Beings and Witches and Wizards will all know their place. There will be no more blood-shed; it will not be tolerated. Such dangerous thoughts as 'Blood Purity' will be abolished. This unity could even bring about a revolu-"
"Avada Kedavra!" Harry discarded the Invisibility Cloak and looked at the two lifeless corpses: "Ron's," whom he had previously weakened, silenced and laid in the open as bait, and Dumbledore's. The real Harry poked the latter with his toe, "You were saying...?"