[i luv ya, Bruce.]
Bruce Banner frowned at the text. The man who sent the text and sit in the same room (There is only two feet long distance between them.), Tony Stark sighed quietly. Texting instead of saying loudly was nice idea. Anyway, he can make that text a joke. Text can make every topic lighter. The only thing he have to is thinking about what is the best joke-
"I already knew that, Tony."
Bruce smiled weakly. 'It's worse.' Tony thought, 'Now he will say 'I'm sorry Tony, but-' or 'I appreciate but-', things like them.' He felt really bad.
But his prediction is wrong.
"And I do also."
Tony Stark was just staring Bruce with dumb face. You do also what? What? WHAT? No one can say now Tony Stark is that playboy. He looks like a teenage boy who is just in first love. Bruce chuckled at the face.
If there were a happiness-Olympic, Tony Stark can get bronze, at least.
Arc reactor was pounding all the night, so Tony couldn't sleep well. But Tony doesn't care. Really. He even made a really big smile when Pepper brought a pile of paper to him. Those made her really creep out. Pepper demanded what made him so crazy. Of course Tony neglected that question and just made a bigger smile. He ordered JARVIS to make a reservation of one of the greatest restaurant in the city and deliver a nice suit for Bruce right now.
JARVIS's sense was not bad. Bruce is not used to three-button suit. He repeatedly pulled his collar to be more comfortable. Tony is now concerning whether buy a closet of suit and change all of the loose things. And he wanted to change the heartbeat sensor into a nice watch. Tony cannot think that's necessary, because he never heart the warning sound from the little machine looks like a watch.
Bruce raised one eyebrow and sighed.
"Tony, you know, to me, clothes is just-"
"I can buy new clothes to you even after the other guy tear out thousands clothes, Bruce. And you have to wear suit to go into the restaurant."
Of course if someone is with that Tony Stark, he or she can wear loose pants or bikini when he or she is in the greatest restaurant in New York city. But Tony want to see his sweetheart dressed nicely. he wants to express this happiness to everywhere.
Bruce rolled his eyes and just said, "Then let's go."
In the car, talking between Bruce and Tony was nice. Tony Stark cannot understand why he tried to converse with someone before he met Bruce who is the nicest counterpart. He cannot believe he exploited his mouth with useless sayings. They chatted, laughed, attacked each other's hypothesis, and then laugh again. They converse happily during dinner also. Time flies like an arrow. When they got out of the restaurant, Bruce stopped suddenly. Tony turned back to him.
"Can we take a walk?"
Tony made a smile that he made hundreds times the day and say "no problem." There is a small park near the restaurant. Tony called Happy and ordered him to get them when he called. They talked in more relaxed mood while they were walking. About what Tony made at 11 years old, about what happened when Bruce was in India, and then about Avengers... About nothing and everything.
Bruce stopped at a small pond in the park. Moonlight danced on the surface of the pond and that was so much beautiful. But Tony cannot appreciate the beauty of the nature because he was too busy looking at Bruce. The doctor smiled peacefully. Tony thought it was more beautiful. He tilted his face carefully and approached to Bruce's face...
"Wait."
But what Tony's lips met was not other lips. Callused index finger pressed on Tony's lips.
"Was it a date?"
"WHAT?"
If Pepper was this 'Tony Stark lost his words' scene, maybe she would have a heart attack.
"Then what do you think?"
"Just fine dinner."
"What?"
"Well, I started doubting in the middle part."
"Wait, Bruce. Why isn't this a date?"
"Then why is this a date?"
Tony and Bruce stared each other for a while silently. The one who opened the mouth first was Tony.
"Yesterday, I said I love you."
"Yes."
"You said you love me too."
"Yes."
"Then why isn't this a date?"
Bruce's eyes didn't show much emotion as usual. Stillness or indifference with a little annoying. 'Let me understand what you are saying' Tony suddenly stopped breathe.
"Isn't we in the... sort of relationship?"
"Is there anyone say about that between us?"
Nope. But, but. Tony started feeling like he is not on earth or he has no common sense. Telling I love you and being told he love me. Where is the problem? Bruce turned back and walked along the way he went.
"Let's go back."
Tony cannot move his feet easily.
"I'm sorry for kidding you out of awareness. It seems like the days I ran away made me dull at human interaction."
Tony called Happy and he arrived soon. "Was that a nice time?" Happy asked quizzically but soon shut his mouth down because of Tony's cold face and Bruce's usual indifferent face. Thick silence filled in the car. Time crawled like a slug but finally they arrived at tower. Two didn't say anything even though they are in the same elevator.
"Good night, Tony."
Bruce said that before he go into his room. He said that like nothing happened between them. Tony didn't say anything.
Tony didn't drink. It would be the world's most hilarious thing, drinking because of a comedy he made by himself. But Tony's headache was as bad as the day after of heavy drinking. He opened the door of common lab habitually. Bruce was working with microscope, wearing loose shirt and pants. He turned his head slowly and greeted Tony.
"Good morning, Tony?"
Bruce always come into the common lab earlier than Tony. So the good morning greeting from Bruce in now on Tony's schedule. But Tony cannot bear the 'good morning' in that day. He stared Bruce's calm eyes numbly, and then turned back to get out from the lab.
Bruce stared where Tony had been.
About during a week, Tony stark was soaked in alcohol. He repeated assembling and dissembling machines. And then he slept on the floor like fainting. Someone shook him to wake him up. Tony rolled his body to avoid the hand.
"Leave me alone...I need more sleep..."
"Tony, wake up."
"Pepper? I cannot go any meeting. Tell them I'm so sick. Well, I feel like it's real..."
"Meeting was already over. If you want to sleep, at least do that on your bed. You made us worry."
"You worried me?"
"I feel like I got some ages. And Dr. Banner also worried so much."
"Doctor? No kidding. If he worried, he would come here."
"Tony, there are just you and me who having the security cord for this lab."
Tony blinked several times and slowly sat up. Cold floor was not a good place to sleep. He shook his head to get a clear vision. Hangover made his thought blurred.
"Okay, bed. That sounds nice."
He felt like his brain is empty. Tony walked out of the lab like a growling zombie. Bruce was there, on the hallway, like the pepper's words are not lie. The doctor was wearing a concerning face. Tony likes that more than the indifferent look he saw in the common lab a week ago.
[i luv ya. n ya luv me.]
[You still awake?]
[only 2.a.m. im in clear mind.]
[Contradictory for a drunken. Well, I won't point out that.]
[if problm is withut prior-notice. ill do now. Next Dinner Will Be A Date.]
[No.]
[What? Why?]
[Cause I don't want.]
[then if friend dinner?]
[If you can distinguish two, I love it.]
[i cant understand ya.]
[Isn't it obvious? Good night, Tony.]
Bruce and Tony came back to their daily routine. Sometimes Tony Stark doubted whether he said Bruce loving him or not. It feels like a dream, because it had no effect on the reality.
Bruce was too still. Tony had not been able to hide his emotion and even spilt it everywhere so Bruce can notice that. However Bruce had not blushed even while he said he love Tony Stark. The heartbeat sensor was so calm even at that moment. That's a shame for a playboy. But Tony Stark realized what is different between pretending he is in love and being in love after he met Bruce, and he is a newbie for latter one. He cannot imagine what is in Bruce's brain.
Hey, Banner, How can you be that much still while I'm like this? Maybe I should pet a green guy.
Still having Bruce as a friend is nice. The reason Tony hesitated saying his mind was being afraid of losing a friendship. But even he has Bruce as a friend and nothing was changed, sometime Tony tasted bitter in his mouth. But Tony cannot pester Bruce for more affection. Now Tony was too vernerable to lose small happiness like having a meal together, chatting together and sharing a lab together. He will be a little bubble if he lose more.
One night, two scientists was watching TV for cool down their brains. No one knows why, but they settled down at News channel. Anchor's voice filled the whole living room. They are just shut down and let TV babbled all thing. Bruce was immersed in news and Tony leered at Bruce. Half-shutting eyelids. The lights broken over the eyelashes. Relaxed and peaceful face. There was a small smile on Banner's face.
"Isn't it beautiful?"
Tony startled at the voice and move his sight on the screen. Blue sea. Small waves were breaking on the shore. Tony swiftly read the name of the place. It's not unfamiliar place for him.
"There is nice."
"Have you gone there?"
"I have a cabin near there."
Bruce nodded as showing his understood. Soon the news was changing and showed a scene in the middle of a battle. The smile on Bruce was broken. Sudden loss feeling rushed to Tony.
"Do you want to go there?"
"Well, yes. It's a beautiful place."
"Then go there next week."
"Won't Mrs. Potts be angry?"
"I have no schedule next week, and I will warn her now to not having anymore."
Tony tapped his cell phone and Bruce looked him with odd face. Tony stopped his fingers and stared the doctor. Bruce asked with surprised voice.
"We really go?"
"Is there any reason not to go?"
"No."
"Then go. Being stocked up in the tower is not a healthy thing. And I also want to go there after a long time."
Tony tapped the send button. And he swiftly turned off his cell phone before Pepper calls and scolds to him. He glanced over Bruce. The doctor has a small smile now.
Beach is beautiful. Tony likes the color of the sea. The odor of sea made his mind clear. Sand are under their feet and that's so nice feeling. Wave is like a child who is running cheerfully and then have a fall. Waves tickled there feet. Bruce made a big grin on his face.
"I cannot imagine the whole island is yours."
"Get used to Tony-Stark-Scale."
"I doubt I can do it."
Peaceful days flows. There was no noise from the city, no voice without two people. Only chirping of sea birds and the sea itself was there. Even JARVIS sounds like taking a nap.
All tense and worrying from land melted down in the sea. Bruce and Tony laughed more often. They splashed the water to each other like children and laughed at each other. They simply wandered around the shore and chatted. In the night, two scientists took sips of coffee and appreciated how many stars are in the sky.
It was a closed world. Tony noticed the closeness took a lot of burden on Bruce's shoulders. This is the last place for worrying about Hulk. Suddenly, Tony thought if Bruce isn't Hulk, he would smile so brightly like here even in the New York.
"Where are you?" Tony shouted. Answer came out from underground. "Basement!" Tony wondered why he was there. There was kind of garbage for workers who are taking care of this cabin. So neither Bruce nor Tony come down after they looked over this place at the first day.
"What are you looking for?"
Bruce hesitated answering. "What is?" Tony asked again. Then Bruce opened his mouth.
"A spare."
"A spare?"
Tony raised his eyebrow.
"It's just behind of you."
Tony directed a spare which can be used to bury a man, and Bruce shook his head.
"Something smaller, like trowel?"
"A trowel? Why are you looking for that?"
"This is beach."
"I know. Do you want some flowers on the beach?"
Bruce shook his head again. Tony had to ask several time to made Bruce tell the truth. Bruce blushed a little. "I want to make a sand castle." Tony burst laughter, and then Bruce looked like a tomato. Tony weep out his tear and said to Bruce who gave Tony a death glance.
"Don't look at me like that. It's kind of cute."
"I just remembered my childhood suddenly-."
"Okay, okay. Let's make it. You said a trowel? Don't you need a bucket?"
Finally they found an old trowel and a distorted bucket. Tony frowned but Bruce thought that's not a problem for making a sand castle. Bruce grabbed a trowel, and Tony take the big spare and the ugly bucket.
Bruce stopped several time during making a castle because Tony was looking at him and it's so burdensome for him. Tony thought the mixed annoying and shy look was also nice.
But when Bruce finished his sand castle, Tony cannot just look it more.
"Isn't it too small?"
"It's average size."
"You said sand 'castle'! that's a sand hut!"
Bruce frowned. But Tony already stole the trowel from his hand. He draw a line on the ground and made a rectangular sector.
"This is 'castle' size."
"Tony-Stark-Scale again?"
"Hey, of course we both are not architect. But this building had no need for resident so what we have to do is just making a splendid outside. And we have plenty water and sand. And it never need durability. I think, we can make a big achievement in this area."
Eventually the big spare found its role. They can make a big rectangular foundation before lunch time. "Time really flies like an arrow." Bruce said. They discussed about architectural style while having a meal. Of course that discussion is so superficial and childish but very serious. After that, they appreciate the sea waiting the sunlight become soft.
They restarted making sand castle. They made castle at opposite side without any discussion. So the one part looks like tall building in New York, but the other part looks like a lame mosque.
"Bruce, make some height. It's too low."
"No, you cut some height. I have roof and yours not."
Finally Tony cut the top of building because he lost at rock-scissors-paper. Now two parts has similar height and it's better to look.
"It's a castle. So, we need a castle wall. I also want a moat, too. But it will be consuming too much time."
After two scientists finished the wall, there was sunset. Bruce and Tony looked at their hilarious castle with big smile. Tony was so proud of the castle that he put out his cell phone from pocket and handed it to Bruce.
"Take a picture of the castle with me, Bruce! It's worth for some photo!"
Tony lay down next to the giant sand castle. the length is no so different with Tony's height. Bruce burst laughter. Tony hurried Bruce to take a picture before the sun disappeared. And he decided to send the picture to many people.
"Hm, Pepper, Happy, Avengers, and...Oh! I almost forgot about Fury."
"Will you send the picture to Fury?"
"He will become jealous to us."
Tony tapped the send button and put it in his pocket again. And sat between Bruce and the castle. Bruce said playfully.
"We made a big thing at the last day. It's kind of nice."
That statement hit Tony's head hard. Yes, this is the last day in this island. Tomorrow, they will be in New York again. Tony turned his face to see Bruce's face and said.
"If I tried to kiss, will you defend me as last time?"
"Yes."
There was no hesitation at the answer. That made Tony a little upset. Suddenly Bruce asked with calm voice.
"That I told loving you made you that much painful, Tony?"
"What are you saying?"
"If I had said 'I'm sorry, Tony. I want you as a friend.' instead of 'I love you, too.', You maybe thought 'At least we are still friend. It's relieving.', don't you?"
Tony cannot say 'no'.
"Things would be better if I said 'I don't love you.'"
"Bruce, that saying is weird. That sounds like, like if you don't love me I would be happier."
"Doesn't it?"
Tony's mouth blocked all words, but his brain spitted a lot of words. 'Maybe. Maybe really it does. I would be really thankful to have Bruce still as a friend. I would have no more greed.' Tony put his face in his hands. Sand sticked on his face, but he didn't mind.
"Fuck. I love you, and you said you love me. But you know what is strange? We love each other but here is no one being loved. I don't know what about you. But sometimes, I really feel like crazy. My emotional resources, well if there are something like that exist, I am burning all my emotional resources to make something but all I have is just ash. I feel like that."
'Shit, Sand in my eyes.' Tony thought.
"It was the really nice days in this island."
"Me too. I want things like this forever."
"We can."
"Even though we can, you cannot be happy. Because you will want more."
"Will I?" Then Tony saw Bruce tapped his own lips. Oh, yes, Bruce was right.
"Yes. I will want more. But, fuck, isn't it natural? I love you. Greeting you, sharing fun things with you, chatting with you and sharing in same place is happy things. But I want more. I want to hold your hands. I want to hug you tightly and kiss you. I want you in my bed."
Sun is now below the horizon. Wind becomes chilly and Worlds becomes darker. It's now harder for Tony to distinguish Bruce's expression.
"Don't you want?"
"I also want that."
"THEN WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?"
Tony grasped Bruce's wrists hard. Bruce gasped and tried to let himself free. But Tony gripped him harder.
"Permit me to love you."
Bruce shut his mouth.
"And permit you to love me."
Chilly wind petted them. Tony shivered. He thought it's unfair. Bruce could his weeping and words, but he cannot read Bruce's face because all world is dark now. He dropped his head. He could feel Bruce's knees on his forehead.
"Plead."
Bruce thought It's unfair. Bruce can Tony's words, but Tony cannot see his face.
"Tony."
Bruce hugged Tony's head carefully. Is it for avoiding the coldness of night wind or for consoling him? It's unclear.
"Thanks to you, I, I could regain things that I once thought I couldn't feel them anymore. And I know you will give me more things if I permit myself. And I also want that life."
"Then permit."
"I shouldn't."
"Why?"
"Because I saw pepper."
Tony raised his head without warning, so his head and Bruce's chin came into collision. Both let out small painful moan.
"Pepper and I are not in relationship! You think-"
"I know."
"Then what?"
"I mean I saw how much you made Pepper worry. I'm not blaming you. I love you because you are that Tony Stark. But definitely, as much as I let you have the control of my life and emotion, I will be worrying you deeply. What I can think 'That's Tony Stark' before will break my heart soon."
The night sea is so cold that Tony cannot the heat of the day. Tony badly want the little heat that hugged him.
"I cannot have a relationship with someone. If he is a stranger to me, I don't care he would die or not soon. If he is my friend, I would care but never lost myself because of him. But If there was more feeling? It can be a problem."
Isn't it a sad contradictory? Tony can hear the saying from Bruce's voice.
"I must will be angry."
"Then be angry. I don't care whether you break the world or not. You can live a selfish life. I will repair all things you broke. I like that life, too. Stay beside me until the world broken. I'm okay to be crushed to death under the world you broke."
"You know that's not okay."
Bruce thought it's unfair. Tony cannot see what is like his face.
"You are in that world."
Pepper said to them.
"How did you build that sand castle?"
"Being genius."
Tony pouted. Pepper looked at Bruce with wondering face. Bruce just gave her a weak smile.
'I will go back India.'
That day, Bruce said that to Tony just after came into the cabin. Tony didn't ask the reason. He knows enough. Just he ask to stay with him for several days before leaving, because long flight is not good for body.
Bruce nodded and accept that lame excuse.
They never did something stupid with the reason 'this is the last'. They just pretend their daily routine is fine. Good Morning? So-so. Tony, Chocolate bar is not a meal. It's a nice invent of 21 century! Shall we take some rest? Don't stay up too late, Tony. I will, I will. Good night, Bruce.
When Bruce got out of their common lab with yawning, Tony fiddled with his cell phone. He repeated typing some words and erasing them.
But he never sent that.
"I will go now."
Bruce has just a little bag. With a thought that there are more baggage than people in the airport, What Bruce carries is surprisingly little. Tony suddenly realized that Bruce is a person who can go anywhere anytime.
"Be careful not to punch poor jerks."
"Don't worry about that. Everyone is safe if I'm not near you."
They are staring each other for a while. Tony want to way something, but he can't. Bruce's eyes are deep and still as usual, so he cannot what Bruce thinks now.
Suddenly Bruce grinned.
"Tony."
When Tony tries to look at the man, all of his thinking stops. It's very familiar touch. But since Tony Stark met Bruce Banner, He is not the playboy anymore. Now he is freezing like a nerd boy who is first-kiss-attacked by a cheerleader girl. Tony cannot think anything without the warm feeling on his lips.
Then annoying noise interrupted the moment. Lips are separated. Maybe that's three-second moment. Those times are like a flash and eternity simultaneously. Tony numbly stared Bruce who turns off the heart beat sensor now.
"Not a surprise."
Tony and Bruce let a laugh out.
"It's the last experiment, isn't it? So, Can't change your mind?"
"No."
"Well, It's okay."
"Hm, really? That's not sound like you."
"I just get an amazing kiss."
Bruce wondered what he is talking about, but he cannot help smiling when he saw Tony's idiot grin.
Pepper and Happy was so surprised when Tony came into the car without any tear.
"I'm surprised at you have kind of self-control, Tony. Of course crying alone in the airport is the last thing you want to be taken by paparazzi."
"Crying? Oh come on, who is crying?"
"You is hooked on the doctor."
"Ha, I'm not crying at that kind of thing. Am I a child?"
Pepper just shrugged and Happy rolled his eyes.
And Tony Stark is a child. Tony started crying just after they leave the airport. Pepper sighed and handed a handkerchief. Soon he used up all tissues in the car and two handkerchief from his employee. And he is now making his foresleeves dirty. Pepper sighed again.
"Put your sunglass on. You look funny."
"I shouldn't cry, shouldn't cry." Pepper told off him. "Isn't it too late?" But Tony cannot care about Pepper's comment. "He isn't able to even cry." Tony just murmured.
Bruce is in India now. He is so surprised when he opened his cell phone and found a text. Who sent it is obvious. He hesitated a little but decided to see what it is.
[if ya come NY, call me plz]
And there was a photo when they are in the island. Bruce grinned. Yes, Tony Stark is a person who can make Bruce worry about his heart beat with just a text.
And That's why Bruce Banner love the man.
Bruce agonized a little before he decided to put the cell phone in his pocket instead of bin. Before checking the text, He thought he should throw it out because that device lets people track him easy. But, he changed his mind.
[If I go.]
Tony Stark glared the screen for a while. "God! He drives me crazy!" "You are annoying, Tony. You got a receive text from the doctor? I thought that's a miracle." Tony pouted and turned his back to Pepper.
"You don't understand me, Pepper."
"That's what the doctor's role. I still don't know why you two are in that kind of relationship."
Tony don't deny Pepper's saying because he knows it will be useless work. After the photo of kissing in the airport was on the tabloid, Pepper thought Bruce as Tony's love. And several times she laughed at Tony's hand of the photo which don't know where to go.
"Of course you don't know."
"Oh, how sure you are."
"You never get a kiss between world peace and love."
"Ugh, you become creepier, Tony."
Tony just turned off the screen. He didn't send another text. Either Bruce or Tony knows that's unnecessary.
The day which earth was about to doom, we stepped in each other's world.
And you kissed me beyond the danger of breaking the world.
I decided to wait you until this feeling are worn down.
Who can know? Maybe there will be another miracle for us.
"Until then, Goodbye, Bruce."
A/N : Did you enjoy this story? I hope so. I'm so sad when I ended story like this even though I thinks this is the proper ending for this story. I wrote another ending for this story which is implying happiness between them... But I cannot sure if I upload that whether I degrade my story by myself or not.
Anyway, Thanks to read this story. I love you all!