Disclaimer: I don't own anything, or have rights to anything.
Author's note: The follow-up is almost done, and is entitled "More Difficult Than Previously Thought"; I'm also working on an obscenely weird story about Jim, from the perspective of his roommate, Mark.
Pam reached behind her head to pull her ponytail tighter. Her hands were shaking slightly, from lack of sleep and nervousness. She had made Roy drive her in to Dunder-Mifflin early, to his protestation and non-understanding. She sat stock still at her desk, solely accompanied by a little 8 a.m. light and a lot of fluorescent overheads. Her palms were sweating too, as she turned on her monitor. Taking a deep breath, she clicked on Outlook. But, Pam's inbox was devoid of what she really wanted to see. Of course he's not going to send me an e-mail. She released her held breath and allowed herself to relax a little.
The night previously, Jim had confronted her about his feelings for her—the depth of which surprised her. At first, she had been terrified and confused. She quickly transformed her uncertainty and feeling of helplessness into the somewhat shaky resolution of a woman about to be married, after a three year engagement. Until she saw him again, a few minutes later. Her heart fluttered as she spoke words she couldn't remember afterward. Because he had walked right up to her, bent down and kissed her.
She had gone over it many times—how he had gotten so close to her that her heart leapt, how he had leaned into her and held on. She knew that Jim cared for her, but she had talked herself into ignoring any possibilities that might arise from thinking about him in that way. When his hands were on her, she could almost feel the palatial ridges on the tips of his fingers, marking her forever. Leaving his fingerprints. She was jarred out of her reminiscences by the sound of the elevator springing to life in the shaft. She rose immediately. A feeling of panic swept over her, and her eyes darted to the women's restroom. Upon making it inside, she made sure to close the door quietly behind herself.
She looked in the mirror, and was engulfed by dismay. Pam followed the fine lines that framed her smile, which settled underneath her eyes. They weren't there when I first started here. I look old, she thought. She heard footsteps outside, and her self-deprecation came to a stop. She scurried into the first available stall, and held her breath. And then it came back to her how much trouble she had reacting to Jim. After he had made his confession, she had momentarily felt as alienated as a person who had stumbled into the wrong room in a party. And then, when he had later initiated their kiss, she had kissed him back, but after only a moment she was back in the real world.
She realized that cameras were recording them in their most intimate moment, so they left the office to talk for a while. Jim was silent as they walked out of the office, while in the elevator, and as they walked out to his car. He looked around for onlookers as they crossed the parking lost, but otherwise had his eyes on her. Pam hadn't realized it at the time, but she had been looking back at him. She couldn't look away. Their ride in the car was quiet, until Jim broke the silence.