IN THE REDDY MART ALONE
Beep. Superglue. Good gravy, who bought superglue on Life Day Eve?
Beep. Life Day lights. Well, that sort of made sense.
Beep. Some toy police speeder with an obnoxious siren sound effect. That made even more sense.
"Here's your receipt. Have a happy Life Day, and thank you for choosing Reddy Mart," Hutch said and handed his last customer of the night her purchases.
The customer didn't bother repeating the blessing or even acknowledging Hutch's existence. She grabbed her bag and practically sprinted out the door. Well, at least she was his last. He just had to clock out, throw his vest and name badge into his locker, and then he would be home to watch a Life Day holo with his wife, Hero, and drink warm cocoa in front of the fire. Just the way it should be.
"Hutch?"
Hutch nodded to his manager, currently the only other person in the store. "Yes, ma'am?"
"It's later than I thought it would be," she began. "A lot later. My kids' presents aren't wrapped yet."
He knew what she was asking and held out his hand. "I'll do the final walk-through and lock up. You go home and be with your family."
"Thank you!" His manager dropped the keys in his hand and practically raced out the door. "Happy Life Day, Hutch!" she yelled before she shut the door behind her.
Hutch sighed and finally allowed himself to roll his eyes.
"Happy Life Day," he said to himself and went to go lock the front door.
...
In the side parking lot, a group of people watched the manager walk out of the Reddy Mart, get in her speeder, and drive away.
"That's the manager," Boba Fett said. "She's the one who's responsible for locking up at night."
"So the store's empty now?" Latts Razzi asked.
"Yeah." Boba smirked. They were in the home stretch now. All they had to do was get what they came for, and then it would all be behind them: the planning, the pretending to work at the stupid Reddy Mart, and having to deal with this crew of bounty hunters. Boba was especially looking forward to the last part. "Give her a minute to drive away and let's move out."
Once they were sure the manager was gone, Boba and his crew snuck up to the front door and let themselves in with the keys they'd swiped from the other manager's purse yesterday.
"Everyone remembers their jobs?" he whispered while they tiptoed through the door into the darkened store.
Nods.
"Good. Move out! We all want to be done with this place."
…
In the back of the store, Hutch hummed a Life Day carol to himself while he walked through the darkened aisles. It wasn't much longer now. He'd done the creepiest part, checking the bathrooms, already and he'd worked his way back. He only had to check electronics before he could finally call it a night, head home, and start celebrating. His wife Hero loved Life Day, and she'd no doubt have baked cookies for them both. That was enough to put a little spring in Hutch's step. That and the thought of how thrilled she was going to be when she saw what he'd gotten her for Life Day.
In the meantime he forgot the verses in the carol he'd just been singing under his breath and made up a few of his own.
"Life Day dinner is delicious. Fa la la la la, la la la la. Eat the turkey and the stuffing. Fa la la la la —."
He froze. Was that the sound of footsteps? But his manager had already gone home.
You're going nuts, he told himself. It's these dark hallways getting to you. "La la la la."
He was just about to start up another verse about presents when he heard it again. Call him crazy, but he is was hearing footsteps! Multiple footsteps.
Hutch was just about to yell "hello?" just to put his mind at ease when he saw the pale, bobbing lights reflected on the store's wall.
He stopped in his tracks and stared. Those weren't the lights from the freezers or from the store's security lights. None of those moved. No, that was the kind of the light that came from flashlights. And if he was the only worker here…
"Boba, where is it?" Someone demanded.
"I don't know! The guys who were working today must have moved it."
Hutch stuffed his entire fist in his mouth to keep from screaming.
A bunch of people had broken into the store.
While he was in it. By himself.
A reasonable person would call the police, and Hutch was a reasonable person. At least, he would be if his comlink wasn't locked in his locker in the break room, right by one of the evil flashlights.
With his fist still in his mouth, Hutch tiptoe-sprinted to the closest hiding place he could think of: behind the electronics counter. He dropped to the floor and leaned up against the case to catch his breath.
I've got to call the cops! He cursed Reddy Mart's no-comlinks-on-your-person-while-working policy not for the first time and thought frantically. The burglars (or whoever the bearers of the creepy flashlights were) had the break room and by extension his phone blocked. They had the front exit blocked, and back exit into the storeroom, and the manager's offices which also had comms.
Hutch took a deep breath and rested his head against the electronics counter when it hit him: I'm sitting against an entire case full of comms!
He fished his manager's keys out of his pocket and unlocked the case. He grabbed the first colink he laid hands on and ripped open the box, praying the thing's batteries had come pre-charged.
The jogan fruit icon lit up the screen with a blinding white light. Praise be.
The comlink hadn't been activated with a provider yet, but that didn't matter. Any comlink, activated or not, could connect to emergency services as long as it had power. And sweet force, did he need emergency services now.
…
"Hello, emergency services?" Hutch whispered into the comlink. "I need the police! There are people trying to take over the Reddy Mart!"
"...Take over the Reddy Mart?"
"I don't know who they are, but there are a bunch of them! They've blocked all the exits and there's no way out. I'm stuck in here with these psychos!"
"You're trapped in a store with a group of intruders, on Life Day Eve?" Hold it, did he hear a smile in the operator's voice?
"Yes! Now hurry and send somebody before they kill me!"
The operator laughed out loud. "Let me guess pal, you're an off-duty cop moonlighting as store security who came into the store to see his wife on Life Day Eve?"
"What? No, no I'm a cashier and I was just supposed to lock up -."
"Sir, here at emergency services we do not tolerate prank calls, especially ones as poorly thought out as this," the operator snapped. "Yippie-kay-yay, mother —." And the dial tone cut him off as he hung up.
Hutch stared at the comlink in shock and anger, wishing he could throw it across the store and scream at the operator to send someone. He would have called back to get another operator if he wasn't sure that the first one was relating the story of the "stupid prank call" to the entire room.
Emergency services wasn't coming. Who else could he get?
"Who are you feeding, Bonteri, an army?" Hutch asked a few days ago while he checked out Lux Bonteri. "These are more groceries than you buy in a month."
"Ahsoka and her master are coming over for Life Day dinner with Senator Amidala," Lux explained. "I want to make a good impression."
Ahsoka and her master were Jedi. Who needed emergency services when you could have Jedi?
Yeah, and how am I going to get ahold of them with a deactivated comlink?
Hutch looked around the room for something he could use to call Lux. Earbuds, no. Comlink cases, no. Guidebook for various apps, no — wait.
Hutch opened the settings on the comlink and hit pay dirt. Reddy Mart may not have let their employees carry comms, but they did have storewide wireless HoloNet for their customers.
Hutch hooked up to the HoloNet service and then downloaded a HoloNet talking app designed for people who traveled a lot. It helped them place voice calls without getting roaming charges by connecting through the Net and not the comlink's network. And luckily enough, Lux had asked Hutch to fix his comlink a while ago after he'd had issues installing this very app.
"Pick up your comm," Hutch whispered while he made the call. "Come on Bonteri, pick up your comm!"
…
Across Iziz, Lux Bonteri was trying to figure out the best way to slip an arm around Ahsoka Tano's shoulders without startling her or acting like a jerk. They were sitting on the couch watching a Life Day holo while Anakin and Padmé were in the other room fixing dinner, and Ahsoka had done the preteen-like thing where she'd put her hand on the cushions between them to signal him it was okay to hold it. He'd yet to act, and the holo was almost over. He had to do something and take his chances, fast.
Just as he was about to make his move, his comlink rang.
"Is that Saw?" Ahsoka asked, craning her head to see the caller's ID.
"No." It wasn't a traditional call, instead it came through his traveling app. And the ID was someone named ITS HUTCH HELP ME LUX.
"Huh?" He accepted the call. "Bonteri here. Is this Hutch?"
"Help me!" Hutch St. James' voice whisper shrieked.
"Hutch, what is it?"
"Oh Dxun. I'm at work. I'm in so much trouble. Please tell me Ahsoka's there!"
"She's right next to me." At "she" Lux had Ahsoka's full attention. "I'm going to put you on speaker, okay? Here she is."
Ahsoka raised an eye marking in question. "Hello?"
"Ahsoka!" Hutch shrieked in the same whisper as before. "Ahsoka, there are a bunch of people taking over the Reddy Mart!"
"What?"
Hutch explained how he'd stayed alone in the store to lock up when a bunch of people had broken in, and that he'd found a place to hide but the police thought he was joking. "I've got to get out of here, but I don't know how. Please help me!"
Ahsoka snapped into Commander mode. "Alright Hutch, how many intruders are there?"
"Uh, five I think?"
"And how many exits are there?"
"There are two near the front, two near the back, and one over by the offices and the break room. I'm boxed in."
"Are those all the exits in the store? Surely you have something else for emergencies?"
"Yeah, we do." There was new hope in Hutch's voice. "But it's in the back."
"As long as it isn't the exact door they're using, you should be okay. How close are you to it right now?"
"Close! I can make it, I think."
"Okay Hutch. Walk on tiptoe, stay up against the walls, and try to make as little noise as possible while you make your way to the door. Lux and I will be here on the comm the whole time."
…
Hutch held his breath and got to his feet, edging out of his hiding place and along the wall on tiptoe. He could see the exit sign over the emergency door glowing in the darkened store.
Unfortunately, he could also hear the intruders in the back room.
"Found it!"
"Well it's about kriffing time! Where was it?"
"They're all boxed up in individual packages and then they were stacked on pallet for the forklift. Help me go through them."
Stacked on a pallet for the forklift? Hutch wondered. What's on the pallet except for the …?
Aw man. Please, let me be wrong.
Against his better judgement and all the safety lectures he ever sat through, Hutch edged closer to the back room and the intruders.
A human teenager and a shockingly pale woman with a red ponytail were shoving boxes from the forklift to a purple Theelin and a Trandoshan, who sliced them open with vibroblades and went through the contents.
"How many more of these are there?" the Trandoshan demanded.
"Lots! Now sort them faster, Bossk." Ponytail snapped.
Bossk hissed and went back to sorting the contents. Which, Hutch could see now, were …
Crap. It is what I think it is.
He backed away from the door, away from the intruders … and away from the emergency exit.
"Guys, I can't run."
"What? Why?" Ahsoka demanded, rapid-fire commander style. "Are the intruders blocking the exit?"
"No. They're stealing Life Day."
Silence. Then Lux spoke. "A bunch of grinches broke into the Reddy Mart?"
"Worse. Reddy Mart's been collecting donations for families in need during the holiday season and they're going to deliver them tomorrow. They're all boxed up on a forklift ready to go."
"Okay, so?"
Hutch looked over his shoulder to make sure nobody had heard him. "The store put a gift card in every one of these packages so the families can get groceries and stuff. Those cards can liquidate into credits really, really easily if you sell them on the HoloNet. And they're stealing them. If I run away, those families aren't going to be able to have Life Day dinner. Heck, they won't have money even for groceries. These people are gonna ruin Life Day for a ton of families if I don't do something."
"Hutch, what are you going to do?"
"I...am not sure! But I'm going to do something!"
…
"Oh my gods, what am I thinking?"
Hutch scurried away from the door, regretting every heroic thought he'd had that day.
"What am I thinking? I should have just ran out the emergency door, gone home, and eaten my Life Day dinner," he muttered to himself. "But nope, nope I've gotta save Life Day and somehow not get killed by the psychos who broke into my store. Piece of cake! Why don't I do this every Life Day?"
He entered the one place he was sure the intruders weren't going to raid, the toy aisle, and came to a stop in front of a mostly empty display of toy police speeders. Had it only been half an hour since he'd last checked out that lady buying this exact toy for her kid? The Reddy Mart could hardly keep them in stock and he couldn't count how many times the annoying siren had gone off at his cash. It sounded just like a police siren.
Hutch's head snapped up. No way; that's crazy talk.
But maybe, it could work.
He grabbed one of the annoying toys and left the toy aisle. He had a plan, a questionable plan, but when the alternative was nothing, questionable sounded pretty good.
…
Hutch's shopping list:
One annoying toy police speeder.
One wireless speaker.
Flashing Life Day lights.
Corn Starch and corn syrup
Vinegar
Gloves
A five-gallon bucket
Wire cutters
Electrical tape
A holy book of Unifras for the likely scenario that this plan went straight to Dxun
…
Once he'd gathered the last of his items he grabbed his deactivated comlink and called Lux and Ahsoka back on the app. "Guys, I've got a plan."
"What kind of plan, Hutch? Sit in the Reddy Mart and die?" Lux squawked.
"I actually have a better plan than that, believe it or not."
"Alright, what is it?" Ahsoka asked. "And what took so long?"
"I had to get supplies." Hutch screwed the comlink's hands-free earpiece into his ear and pocketed the device. "I need you two to stay with me. Y'know, for moral support?"
"Not going anywhere, Hutch. What's the plan?"
"Right. Okay." Hutch took a deep breath and, like a surgeon about to make their first incision, whispered: "Right now, I'm disabling the alarm on the emergency door."
"I thought you wanted to call the — okay, never mind." Lux gave up. "How are you doing it?"
"The alarm goes off when a sensor on the door separates from one on the frame." Hutch slipped on a pair of insulated gloves and pulled out the wire cutters. "So all you have to do is detach the sensor from the door, be very careful not to jostle it, and tape it to the one… on...the wall." He breathed a sigh of relief and secured it with electrical tape. "There, it's done. Alarm is disabled."
"Now may I ask why you disabled the alarm that would have called the police for you?"
"Because it sets off an alarm, and I need to get out and then back in undetected." Hutch very carefully eased the emergency door open. No alarm. "Okay, that's working. Next I spread my little surprise."
He grabbed the five-gallon bucket and got to work outside.
…
"What did you do, go out for a burger?"
"I wish. I was setting up my plan." Hutch whispered and finished synching the wireless speaker to the comlink. "Don't talk about food Lux; I'm starving. And thinking of food makes me think about my wife, who's probably gonna have to identify my body after these people kill me!"
"Okay, so we won't talk about food," Ahsoka said. "What's your plan? Walk me through it."
"Right." Hutch took a deep breath. "Okay, so I can use this app to call you because the Reddy Mart has open wireless HoloNet. That same broadband allows me to connect this comlink to other devices which use the HoloNet."
"Like what?"
"We're gonna find out in three...two...one!"
…
In the back room, Boba Fett and his crew were almost done loading up the gift cards. He could scarcely believe how much money a stupid grocery store had on it — and in gift cards no less! Gift cards were even better than stone cold credits. They liquidated fast and without a trace, and they could be used for just about anything in the meantime. If this worked out, they'd have to do this again. Aurra surely wouldn't object, and neither would Bossk or Latts. Low stakes, high rewards. It was a bounty hunter's perfect job.
He was just about to grab the bag of gift cards and move out with the rest of his team when blue-and-red lights started flashing in the main part of the store and a police siren screamed to life.
"It's the cops!" Aurra shouted.
…
"Hutch, what am I hearing?" Lux asked half in fear and half in awe.
"That is the sound of a wireless speaker taped to the top of an annoying toy police speeder." Hutch surveyed his handiwork. "And my flashing Life Day lights are working too. Splendid."
"Flashing Life Day lights?"
"Yeah, red and blue. Y'know, like police speeder lights?"
"Nice," Lux truly sounded convinced of Hutch's possible success there. "So, you're tricking them into thinking the cops are storming the store?"
"That's phase one." Hutch wiped the nervous sweat from his brow. "Or maybe phase two? Is it phase two if I did it before phase one?"
This time it was Ahsoka's turn to ask. "What do you mean, 'did it before phase one'?"
...
Meanwhile, back in the back room…
"How'd the cops get here?" Latts demanded.
"Some nosy tooka lady must have called them!" Boba shot back, because that was honestly his best guess. "Just grab the cards and run for it!"
Bossk didn't have to be asked twice. He grabbed two of the four bags, lobbed one at Aurra, and all four bounty hunters bolted for the back exit. It was on the opposite side of the parking lot from their speeder, but it was their best shot at getting away because -
"No copsss on thiss ssside of the lot!" Bossk hissed.
"Not for long!" Boba urged. "Go! We're done here!"
All four of them blasted out of the back room with the gift cards, into the parking lot and toward freedom...until their feet refused to move and they all almost wiped out.
"What the -?" Boba looked down to his feet to figure out what was going on and couldn't believe his eyes. His boots were firmly stuck to in some kind of pale substance.
Aurra glared at him. "Boba," she hissed. "Is this -?"
"Glue!" Latts yelled. "Someone glued us to the pavement!"
"I see that!" Boba snapped.
"Well who did it?"
"How am I supposed to know?"
Latts was about to launch her theory on who did it, namely that is was Boba himself, when suddenly an alarm rang out and a lone figure walked out of the store's emergency exit.
It was a lanky young man, wearing a cashier's uniform and a wicked grin.
"Happy Life Day, ya filthy animals," he said and then the alarm swallowed his voice.
...
"What do you mean, 'did it before phase one'?"
"When I was outside," Hutch explained while he gathered his belongings from the locker room, "I spread homemade glue on the pavement. They're going nowhere fast, at least until the police get here and bust out some rubbing alcohol to release the adhesive."
"Thank the gods," Lux breathed. "You're going to call the police."
"Not really gonna call them," Hutch admitted as he approached the emergency exit door with his pocketknife in hand. "More like I'm gonna cut the tape holding the ends of the alarm together and let that do the talking."
He walked past the bounty hunters who stared at him in shock until the reality of the situation hit them and they started screaming.
"Happy Life Day, ya filthy animals!"
"Get us out of here or I'll make sure you don't live to see Life Day morning!" One who looked like a mouthy kid screamed.
"Good luck with that, seeing as you're glued to the pavement," Hutch yelled over his shoulder on the way to his speeder. "Happy Life Day, and thank you for choosing Reddy Mart!"
"Get back here, you cashier from Hell!"
Hutch closed his speeder door on their voices and started the engine to finally make his way home to his beautiful wife and her Life Day dinner before she worried about him too much, before her dinner got cold, and most importantly before the cops arrived.
"Cashier from Hell," he repeated as the Reddy Mart faded from view behind him. "Huh. I kinda like that."
...
Merry Christmas!