It was a normal day in Nohr and by normal, I mean the weather is just terrible. There is not a speck of sunlight and you can't tell if its the day or night. The clouds cover all over the kingdom and its just dark like the residence of the kingdom.
King Garon is sitting in his throne waiting for his children to come. He expects them to be the finest in battle and for his own needs. As the five children of Nohr entered, they remained silent as the king begin to speak.
Garon: As you may know, you are my children. I expected you to be the best and I am aware that you all have been training hard. However, there is one thing missing that I need to do for you all in order for you children to get stronger. That is to bond with you.
Xander, the eldest son: Excuse me father, but what did you say?
Garon: I need to spend time with you all. I have neglected you for a while and I read in the manual that I need to increase my support class to make you all not scrubs.
Xander: As you wish.
Garon: FIrst things first, the manual did say that I must touch you all and then we form some sort of bond. Starting with Camilla, my daughter with the biggest boobs.
The King approached to Elise who only replied with a cute "Oni-Chan". The king was surprised that he was not touching Camilla, but rather his youngest daughter Elise. He backed away as he never expected this to happen.
Garon: Camilla, you gotten small.
Leo, the youngest brother: That would be Elise, father.
Garon: Really? Then who's Camilla?
Camilla, the eldest sister: That would be me.
Garon: I thought you were here. How did you teleported from here to there?
Camilla: I didn't teleported. I was always here when I came.
Garon: You kids are growing up so fast.
Corrin, the second eldest brother: Okay, hold on. Is there something wrong with you father?
Garon: No, but you are the chosen one Kamui! You are destined to save the world.
Corrin: It's Corrin.
Garon: No I could have sworn that's its Kamui.
Elise: Oni-chan.
Garon: Where is that squeaky noise coming from? Must be from Hoshido.
Xander: Its from your youngest daughter, Elise. Father.
Garon: Really. Why does she keep saying that?
Leo: You mentioned that she hit her head as an infant.
Garon: I did. No wonder Zelda is terrible at running her kingdom.
Xander: For the last time father, you are not Ganondorf.
Garon: I have the Tri-force of Power.
Xander: No.
Garon: Draw you sword Link because its dangerous to go alone.
Camilla: That's not what Ganondorf says.
Garon: Oh hey Camilla, didn't see you there. Your coconuts are big as always.
Camilla: Can we not talk about my... chest, father? Every time we talk to each other is always about that.
Garon: Okay, so just to be clear, I'm definitely not going to bring up your double whammies. Your melons are off the table. Hooters are a no-go area. Ixnay on the eavage-clay!
Corrin: Anyways. How about we leave and...
Garon: You are not going anywhere until I touch your face.
Corrin as Garon touch his face: Okay.
Garon: Your face is not as good as your clone.
Corrin: My what now?!
Garon stops touching Corrin and says: Children, you all seemed to be over 50 so I will tell you a secret. I made clones of you all in case one of you dies in battle.
Leo: Such action is an act against nature.
Garon: Yeah, I never cared for nature anyways.
Suddenly a female Corrin comes out of the wall, braying and kicking like a donkey. Everyone was shocked to see what abomination that Garon made. The king doesn't seemed bother by this at all but rather he laughed it off.
Garon: Don't worry kids, its 69% organic.
Corrin: What's the other percent?
Garon: A little of sugar, spice, and everything nice. Also chemical X from some guy named Henry. That guy has a thing for carnage.
Leo: The horror.
Garon: Grow some balls, Leon.
Leo: Its Leo, father.
Garon: Leo, Leon, Tomato, Tomaato. Same thing.
Xander: Where do you keep these clones?
Garon pushes a button from a remote in his pocket. Suddenly a door opened and it revealed a giant arena like cage that is filled with an army of Elise. The Elises' all shouted out "Oni-chan" over and over like a Pokemon. There were tubes at the side with a clone of Leo and Camilla. The siblings looked at horror at what they saw.
Xander: You made clones of us and an army of Elise.
Garon: Actually those girls are failed clones of you. You can never duplicate the moe of Elise.
Elise: Oni-chan.
Xander: You just did with my...why are you so hypo...argh!
Leo: Don't bother Xander.
Garon: Well time for my nap. This is the end of this chapter.
Attain Support Level C!
Notes: By the time I made this story, Fire Emblem Fates did not come out yet. This is just a parody.