a/n: I have a major shipping problem so here is my first attempt at Call the Midwife fanfiction, which I am too shy to post on tumblr. Warnings: It will be cheesy as hell and I'm not really sure how to write these characters yet, so I'm sorry.

A group of men's voices passed by and faded into silence, the grandfather clock in the hallway chimed and two lovers shifted in one another's arms with sleepy smiles on their faces, contained in a single bed. Some of the day's dying light outside the window of the Nurses Home streamed in through a part in the curtains but otherwise, there was a still darkness, leaving everything as good as invisible. It was there, in the darkness that Delia snuggled into Patsy's neck and pulled her girlfriend closer to her. Her girlfriend, who in fear, usually slept on the covers, instead of in them. Ready to escape to her own bed if discovered, but not tonight. They were happy in that, even if anyone could knock on the door any moment and they'd have to part, two separate beds like all the roommates at the Nurses Home. They had to be careful of falling asleep together, as they often had before, as it was a much harder situation to find a way out of it they were caught. It always had a way of hanging over them, the need to sneak around and the impossibility of their situation but there was another sadness settling in that night.

"I don't want you to leave."

Delia mumbled the words that broke the silence with a wishful sigh. Patsy didn't reply. They'd been through it at least twenty times and she'd only feel miserable if she spoke about it again. They had decided it was a perfect opportunity for her to focus on her midwifery, it would mean they wouldn't have anymore close calls as the ache to touch became impossible to ignore and it was only across town, not the other side of the world, even if it felt like that.

"You'll see me soon enough." Patsy reassured her, the dimness of the room hiding her face that was lined with an otherwise telling hint of gloom. A part of her was reassuring herself. She felt Delia nod slightly as she burrowed into the crook of her neck, hugging her tightly. She pressed gentle kisses along Patsy's jaw, lingering as she became closer to her neck.

"I love you."

Delia whispered so lowly the words barely made it to her girlfriend's ears. There was a lot to be said about that and how that was always the way with their love, it always having to be in whispers or seen only in flickering moments, to anyone else but them, it couldn't exist. It could never be as loud as it was felt.

"And you know I love you too."

Silence set in as the words were enough to keep them content, both of them struggling to keep heavy eyelids open for much longer, soon descending into deep slumber, wrapped up in one another. In sleep, they did not consider the unavoidable parting of ways or anything of the thought. They were happy, at peace.

Almost three weeks had passed since Patsy had dragged herself from Delia's side. They'd parted at the Nurses Home, where Delia had held her tightly, as long as she could, Patsy's suitcase waiting by the door, like it was looming over them both. She'd kissed her girlfriend goodbye and hadn't seen her since. Nonnatus House brought a slight change of scene and a change in demand. It certainly kept her busy, from the early hours of the morning to the middle of the night and just about every second in between. She didn't really have much time to think about anything else but she always gave Delia a thought, whether it was on a bike ride home after a long day or a few moments silence meant for praying before they ate. Patsy was settling, or at least felt like she was trying to and she seemed to be out of sync with her girlfriend completely.

After a particularly long day, with a call out to a delivery just before six and another at lunch, Patsy arrived back at Nonnatus exhausted and hungry, slightly annoyed at having missed both breakfast and lunch. The house was now seemingly empty as most of the nuns and midwifes were out on call, only Trixie and Sister Monica Joan remained from what she could hear. Trixie was busy sorting through her equipment before she headed out and Sister Monica Joan was so often content being left in her room that Patsy decided not to disturb either of them. She made her way to the kitchen, hoping there might be leftovers but she was disturbed by a gentle knocking on the door that sent her walking back towards the entrance. She'd opened the door in a completely different mindset than when she registered the woman at the door. Patsy's eyes soften and she smiled widely, her exhaustion forgotten in a moment of seconds.

"Deels!"

She reached out to hug her enthusiastically but had contained herself in time to hug her gently, like an old friend and nothing more, so not to cause a spectacle for anyone around.

"Hello, Sweetheart." Delia stood there looking rather proud of herself, a small brown paper bag in hand. "I've been told you've been rushing around all day, so I'm dropping off your lunch." She was probably using it as an excuse. Delia invited herself inside boldly, Patsy looking a little concerned. "Delia, someone might-" After checking that no one was watching, Delia silenced her girlfriend with a kiss, realizing just how much she had missed her and how long she had wanted to do that.

"I know, I know… I just miss you."

A brief conversation in hushed tones and they'd arranged to see each other next weekend, when they would fully fill each other in on the weeks that they had missed. Patsy had been tense, looked around a few times, whenever there was a slight noise and Delia had her hand clasped tightly. No one could know and it terrified her. Patsy eventually watched Delia leave from the door and moved away from the entrance, barely making it ten steps before she was confronted by Trixie as they passed by one another in the hall.

"And what has put such a wonderful smile on your face?" The blonde asked inquisitively, stopping momentarily.

"I don't know what you mean." Patsy replied. Any attempt at wiping the foolish, lovesick grin on her face probably in vain as the light in her eyes betrayed her.

"If I didn't know better, I'd say you have a gentlemen friend." Trixie called out behind her, before she left through the front door.

Patsy simply sighed; even a little amused at Trixie's comment and made her way to the kitchen with the same wide grin. Feeling optimistic for the first time in a good few weeks, Patsy felt certain that they'd always find their way to make it work.