A/N: Post 7A finale. I loved the reveal so much I just had to write something on it all. Let me know what you think :) Thank you for reading =]
Chapter 1
"Is anybody family?" the doctor asked.
The group shifted uneasily, casting awkward glances at Mary.
Mary stepped forward, clearing her throat and saying tensely, "I'm her mother."
"I'm her cousin," Alison said quietly, stepping up beside her aunt.
The doctor nodded and took them aside, talking to them quietly.
"The bullet missed anything major. It took a while to get the bleeding under control so she's lost a lot of blood – "
"Is she going to be okay?" Mary cut in.
The doctor smiled, "She's going to be fine. She just needs a lot of rest. If we could get you to fill out some paperwork – "
"I…I don't think I can do that," Mary spoke hesitantly, "I'm not…her guardian. I believe they've been contacted and will be here soon. Please, may I see her?"
"Of course," the doctor led them to the room, "She'll be out for a while but go ahead," she left them to it.
Mary put a hand on the door but Alison placed a hand over it, stopping her.
"Why didn't you tell me?" she asked gently, clearly hurt.
Mary closed her eyes and withdrew her hand, before opening them and turning to her niece.
"I didn't know…how," Mary whispered, "I wanted to…"
Alison shook her head, "Why did… did mom know? How did she end up with… is Peter her dad? How did she end up with them? Why didn't you come sooner? Don't you – "
"Alison, please," Mary sounded choked up, "I know you have a thousand questions. Just…believe me, I wanted to tell her. To see her. I tried to come to see her…and Charles, but your mom told me Charles was dead and… "
"And what?" Alison pushed.
"She had a deal with the Hastings," Mary admitted, "To keep it all a secret. To keep me a secret."
"But you could have – "
"I don't want to taint your memory of your mother, Ali – "
"Too late," Alison said, exasperated, "I'm sick of nobody telling me the truth in this family. Please, aunt Mary, just tell me."
Mary read the hurt in the younger woman's eyes, "I'm sorry, Alison. It's just… your mother was in charge of my health care. All it ever took was one word from her and I was back in an institution and in there, I had even less of a chance of knowing any of my children."
"You really think she would do that?" Alison asked then read the expression on Mary's face, "Did she do that? Spencer found a file… saying she signed for…electro-shock therapy."
Mary looked at the door and back to her niece. She knew Alison needed an explanation. Deserved an explanation.
"Yes," she whispered, "I did visit Spencer once… but Jessica said Charles was getting too old… he would be able to remember me so," she sighed, "I tried to fight her on it, Spencer was just a baby… They were my children. But she had custody. And control of… me. She sent me back to that hell…"
"So you stopped trying," Alison sounded more sad than judgemental.
"It was the only way I could get out of that place," Mary shrugged miserably, before looking at the door again.
Alison caught the glance and took a deep breath, "Do you really love her?" she asked quietly.
"I haven't known much love in my life, Alison, but I still remember holding my babies in my hands… Yes, I love her. Please, can we just – "
"Talk about everything else later," Alison nodded, "Of course. I should go tell the girls what the doctor said…but I'll be right back."
Mary nodded, "Sure, of course."
Alison walked away, leaving Mary outside the door on her own. Her hand hovered over the handle hesitantly. She gritted her teeth and forced her fingers around the handle, pushing the door open. She had to force her legs to work, walking into the room.
Spencer was surrounded by machines, some beeping, most not. She looked small and pale, unmoving. Mary felt tears well in her eyes before swallowing them tightly. She stepped towards the bed slowly, casting a glance over her shoulder at the door. Her eyes shifted back to Spencer, resting on the hand that lay on top of the sheets. She came to a stop beside Spencer's bed.
Her hand moved tentatively to her daughters, her fingers simply grazing at first before she tightened them around Spencer's hand.
The girls looked relieved as Alison told them Spencer would be okay.
"And Mary, is she really… " Hanna trailed off.
Alison nodded, "Yeah, I guess so."
"Of all the people we thought could be Mary's second child, I never thought – "
"None of us did," Emily agreed, "Why would we?"
"It does make a few things make sense though," Alison thought aloud.
"Like what?" Hanna asked incredulously.
Alison shrugged, "All the tension between my family and the Hastings. All the whisperings that used to go on. Mom never liked that I was friends with Spencer. She badmouthed her a lot. Plus, don't you guys remember her saying she used to feel like she didn't fit in with her family?"
The others nodded.
"I remember," Emily spoke slowly, "But we were just kids."
Aria frowned, "That's true… but I remember once she told me she thought she was adopted."
"She did?" Hanna asked, surprised.
"Yeah. Her and Melissa had had another fight. Her parents took Melissa's side. There was something about she heard them talking and when she entered the room they stopped. But she said it flippantly, I thought she was just being over dramatic," Aria explained, "like you said, Spencer was always saying she didn't fit in growing up. I mean, it hasn't really been until recently that her and her mom have really gotten on."
"Except Veronica's not her mom," Emily pointed out.
"A mom is more than just the person who gives birth to you," Alison said quietly, "Look at Charlotte. She loved my mom and she was Mary's daughter too."
"Is it really safe leaving Spencer with her?" Hanna asked suddenly.
"She won't hurt her," Alison said quickly, "She…she loves her."
Mary heard the door open behind her and looked around to see Alison and her friends enter the room.
"Has she just been resting?" Alison asked.
Mary wiped her eyes and nodded, "She hasn't woken up."
"The doctor said it could take a while," Alison said.
Mary's fingers still curled around Spencer's hand as she looked at the girls, "Someone has contacted…the Hastings, right?"
Aria nodded, "I called. They were jumping on the next plane, so they'll still be a few hours away."
"Right," Mary nodded.
"Why don't we go and get a coffee or something?" Alison prompted her aunt.
"No," Mary responded automatically, "I want to be here…"
Alison turned to her friends, "You'll call if she wakes up?"
Emily nodded, "Sure, of course."
When Alison managed to pull Mary away, the girls approached the bed.
"She looks so…" Hanna whispered.
"She'll be fine," Aria took her Hanna's hand squeezed it, offering a small smile.
Emily took Aria's hand, "Of course she will."
They all took a seat and watched their friend in silence.
"Maybe coffee isn't a good such a good idea," Alison smiled.
Mary looked down at her leg, jiggling up and down, "Maybe not but caffeine has always been my weakness."
Alison nodded, "Spencer's too," she said quietly.
Mary closed her eyes.
"So, what's it going to be like when Mr and Mrs Hastings get here?" Alison asked.
Mary shrugged, "Ugly, probably," she sighed, "They left me for Jessica to handle. When Jessica… passed away, I was back in an institution. In. Out. Story of my life. I suppose they just hoped I would stay there."
"I don't understand why my mom would do all this…" Alison frowned.
Mary bit her tongue, "My relationship with your mother was…"
"I know, I get that," Alison persisted, "But to keep you from your children, to lie about it… especially when Spencer literally couldn't be any closer. I just feel like… I'm missing something."
Mary hesitated, "It's a long story, Alison."
Alison rolled her eyes, "It always is with this family. I'm sick of not knowing anything. I'm sick of thinking I know people and then realising I never did and it's too late to do anything about it because they're dead," she was ranting now, "I thought I was a good liar and no damn wonder. The more I learn about this family, the more I feel my entire life was just one big lie and I refuse to live my own like that – "
"Alison, please," Mary reached across and placed a hand over her niece's, "I know, I know. You're right. You're absolutely right."
Alison watched her expectantly.
Mary took a deep breath, "The truth isn't pretty. Do you really – "
"I want to know," Alison cut in quietly.
Mary watched the determined look on Alison's face.
She nodded, "Okay, but please, can't we wait until Spencer wakes up? I don't want to tell this story twice."
Alison considered it and nodded, "Fair enough," she settled on.
"We should go back," Mary said quietly.
Spencer's throat felt dry and her eyes heavy. She could hear a faint buzzing which slowly cleared into voices. The words all seemed to run into one another, it was hard to make sense of them. There was a dull ache in her chest. She remembered being shot. Mary. It had been Mary who had stopped Jenna from killing her. She could barely breathe. Someone was singing. It was Mary. She couldn't move but a hand ran through her hair. Mary. But why? Why had she saved her, why had she… I'd never hurt you. I'm your mother.
Spencer sat up, eyes wide and gulping in what felt like her first breath in forever.
"Spencer!"
She turned to see her friends all watching her. Aria was by her side. Mary was next to her.
"You should lay back," Aria said gently, placing a hand on her friends' shoulder.
Spencer breathed deeply and lay back, feeling dizzy. She looked at her friends, who all watched her closely. She offered a small smile.
"I'm fine," she said.
Hanna rolled her eyes, "Even a bullet can't stop you, Spence. We know that."
"Do you feel okay?" Aria asked, "Do you need anything?"
Spencer looked to her and grimaced, "Water would be great. My mouth is…dry."
Mary turned to the side table and poured a cup of water, handing it to Spencer. Spencer looked her in the eyes, then at the water, back to her eyes and took the water, taking a large sip to wet her mouth and throat.
"I don't know if I was hallucinating but did you…" she tried to sound reasonable, to sound brave, to sound like she wasn't falling apart inside, "You were there when Jenna was going to kill me."
Mary nodded, "I…I knocked her out," she confirmed, "And you weren't hallucinating, Spencer. I'm your mother."
Spencer blinked slowly. She looked to Alison.
"Do you believe this?" she questioned.
Alison looked at her aunt and back to her friend, "I do."
Spencer looked at Mary, "I don't… my parents… "
"You should rest," Mary spoke gently, "It's okay. We can talk later."
Spencer could see the tears in the older woman's eyes, "But I have questions. Like – "
"I know," Mary said soothingly, "I promise I'll answer all of your questions when you're well."
Spencer fought the heaviness in her eyelids, "I can't sleep now. I need to know…"
Her eyelids defeated her and she fell into a deep sleep.
"You have no right to be here."
Veronica and Mary argued in hushed whispers, slowly getting louder, whilst Peter stood by watching uneasily.
"I'm her mother, Veronica and she knows it," Mary spoke softly.
"You have no idea what a mother is," Veronica shot back.
Mary spoke through gritted teeth, "Only because you and Jessica pushed me aside."
"You weren't capable of looking after a child," Veronica's voice rose slightly, "You don't land in an institution without cause."
Mary took a deep breath, "You think you know everything that went on back then, Veronica," her voice turned cold, "You don't know a thing."
"I know enough," Veronica crossed her arms, "You need to leave."
Mary looked to the door of Spencer's room, "I'm not – "
"Just go," Veronica snapped, "Security will be informed to turn you away. You don't belong here," she turned on heel and walked away. Conversation over.
Peter watched his wife pass into their daughters' room. He approached Mary skittishly, glancing over his shoulder.
"What are you doing here, Mary?"
"What do you think?" Mary asked, exasperated, "She's my daughter – "
"She's raised," Peter cut in, "We raised her. Why now?"
"I heard about Jessica," Mary shrugged, "I didn't want to stay away, Peter. She made me."
Peter frowned, "What do you – "
"She threatened me. Any time I even tried to visit Charlotte or Spencer… you know she was in charge of my care. The last time I visited she had me committed for electro-shock therapy," Mary said desperately.
Peter looked genuinely shocked, "We didn't…didn't know that," he stammered, "Jessica said you would be institutionalised forever. That you weren't fit to be released, let alone to be a mother."
Veronica popped her head out of the room, "Peter, are you coming?" she asked sharply.
Peter looked to his wife and nodded, before turning back to Mary, "We'll talk okay?" was all he said before walking away.
"No, no," Spencer cried loudly, "He can't be dead."
Veronica held her tightly, "I'm so sorry, honey," she fought back her own tears as she held her shaking daughter in her arms.
"He was going to get away from it all," she whispered, "All of the horror of this town. He didn't deserve this."
"He didn't," Veronica murmured, "He was a very good man. Better for knowing you."
Spencer shook her head, "No. It was the opposite, mom. I was so much better for knowing him. He taught me so much. He helped me through so much, I just can't believe…" her tears stopped her in her tracks.
"I know, I know," Veronica ran a hand over Spencer's back soothingly, letting her cry until her eyes were dry but her pain remained.
Mary sat in the dark, sipping on a glass of whiskey. Veronica had held true to her word; security wouldn't let her anywhere near Spencer's room. So here she was, alone in the dark.
Story of my life, she thought bitterly.
She threw down the last of the whiskey and poured another. It was going to be a long night. Or week. Or month. Or however long it would be until she would be able to see her daughter.
But she would see her daughter. She wasn't giving up this time.
"Honestly, I'm fine," Spencer insisted, "I just want to get out of this hospital and back to my own bed."
Veronica sighed, giving in. She had raised Spencer to be independent, to be strong. She could hardly complain about that now.
"Fine, fine, I'll go and sign the papers."
"Uh-huh," Spencer nodded, "You know we still have a lot to talk about. You can't avoid the conversation forever."
Veronica looked away, "I know," she said quietly, "Let's just get you back home first, okay?" she walked back over to her daughter and kissed her on the forehead, "I love you, Spencer."
Spencer nodded, not replying and watched her mom walk out of the room.
Alison locked her car and started up the steps to her house. She had been to see Spencer and then out with her friends. It seemed to have been the routine of the last few days. Get up, go to Emily's, drive to the hospital, see Spencer then they'd all realise they'd forgotten to eat so they'd head to the brew.
Then she'd come home and check that Mary hadn't drunk herself into a complete stupor. She was still patiently waiting for the full story there. All Alison really knew was that it sounded like her mom had screwed over yet another person. She couldn't help feeling sympathy for Mary; the older woman really was a wreck. She'd never seen her mom express even an ounce of the emotion that she'd seen in Mary the last few days.
True to recent form, there sit her aunt in the dark, whiskey bottle before her.
Alison switched the light on, "Hey, Aunt Mary."
"Hello, Alison," Mary answered monotonously.
Alison huffed in exasperation and walked over, sitting on the coffee table opposite her aunt, "You can't keep on like this. I know you're hurting but drinking yourself stupid isn't go to make it any better. Don't you know alcohol is a depressant? You're just making it harder on yourself."
Mary blinked slowly, taking her time to reply, "You know, you are nothing like your mother, Alison."
"Well, I'll take that as a compliment from you," Alison supposed.
Mary sighed, "I just mean your mother would be disappointed to see you caring about me. She really did hate me, that woman."
Alison didn't hear her aunt talk about her sister very often. She wanted desperately to ask her a thousand questions but she knew she'd get a better version if Mary was actually sober.
"I spent my whole life afraid of her," Mary muttered, "What a waste. Maybe she was right all along. I should have been stronger. I should have… "
"Aunt Mary, please," Alison took a seat next to her, "She wasn't right. She taught me to be…what she called strong and I shut everyone out. It meant I couldn't connect with anyone. It took me a long time to come back from that. We're humans, we're meant to feel."
"Yes, well…" Mary shrugged morosely.
"Perhaps you should go to bed," Alison said gently.
"It's barely eight," Mary half whined.
Alison sighed, "Well, let's at least turn the tv on. You can't just sit in the dark all night."
She picked up the remote and sat next to her aunt.
"Mom, dad, please," Spencer pleaded, "I need to know."
Veronica sighed and sat beside her daughter on the bed, "We love you, Spencer."
"I know," Spencer said, exasperated, "But I still need to know."
"I know you do," Veronica said quietly, looking to Peter.
"Are you really my biological dad?" Spencer asked uncertainly.
"Yes," Peter said firmly.
"So you slept with Mary…" Spencer stated the obvious, "And you slept with Jessica. Jeez, you really had a thing for that family," she spoke slightly sarcastically.
"It wasn't my proudest moment, Spencer," Peter hung his head before sighing and looking up, "Your mom and I were having problems, years before you were born. We weren't getting along… I was at a bar, drowning my sorrows one night. Mary had only just got out of Radley and she'd already been fighting with Jessica. She ended up at the same bar and well..."
"Charlotte," Spencer whispered, "You're her dad, too."
"Yes," Peter admitted, clearly embarrassed, "I am…ashamed to say the next time I saw her, years later, another release from Radley I believe, we found ourselves in a… similar situation and…"
"I get it," Spencer muttered, "I don't need the details. But why didn't you ever tell me? Why didn't I ever see her?"
Peter looked to Veronica and back to his daughter, "Jessica approached us to say Mary was pregnant…again. Mary was already back in Radley by this point. Jessica was newly pregnant with Alison… we decided that the baby, that you would be best off with us. Just as she'd decided that she would take in Charles, Charlotte years earlier. Jessica said that her sister had had a total mental breakdown. She told us about how Mary had hurt a baby when she was younger. That she had hurt didn't want her around you and besides, Jessica said that Mary was likely to be institutionalised for the rest of her life. Things were different then, Spencer."
"So you thought you'd never see her again?" Spencer asked.
"We did," Veronica confirmed, "And we all agreed to never speak of it. Any of it. Because we are your parents," she finished firmly.
Spencer nodded slowly, "I know you are, mom. That's not going to change. I just wish I'd known… it would have made things made sense… Didn't you ever think to tell me when I ended up in Radley? Mental illness is hereditary, you know."
"Of course we thought about that connection," Peter shook his head, "We just didn't think it would be any benefit to anybody at that point."
A tense silence hung between the family.
"She saved my life," Spencer said quietly.
Peter and Veronica exchanged nervous glances.
"It doesn't mean you're not my parents," Spencer spoke slowly, "But I need to talk to her… and you need to respect that."
"Morning."
Mary turned around to see her niece walk into the kitchen, "Good morning."
Alison smiled, "Up to much today?"
Mary frowned, "I don't think so. I thought I'd perhaps sort through some of those papers… see if there's anything we missed."
Alison nodded, "I wish…" she sighed, "It doesn't matter. We're all working together now. No more secrets. Right?"
Mary smiled, "Right. We will find this person, Ali. You will be safe again, all of you."
There was a knock at the door.
"I'll get it," Alison chirped, flouncing off.
She returned with Spencer by her side. Alison looked between Mary and Spencer, a little uneasily.
"Spencer," Mary was surprised and nervous.
Spencer's eyes darted around the room, "I thought we could… talk."
"Of course," Mary nodded.
"Why don't I get everyone something to drink?" Alison asked.
"Coffee."
"Coffee."
The two women spoke at the same time before looking at each other. Alison smiled a little as she walked away to get the drinks. Mary took Spencer through to the lounge and gestured for her to sit down.
"How are you feeling?" Mary asked.
"Oh, I'm okay," Spencer shrugged, "A little sore but nothing I can't deal with."
"I suppose they have you on something to help with that," Mary fiddled with her hands nervously.
Spencer hesitated, "They did but I'm not taking them. I've had issues with pills so I'm avoiding them as best I can."
Mary nodded slowly, "Perhaps that is my fault," she said quietly, "I have had problems with addiction too. Anyway, I'm glad you're feeling better than last time I saw you," she paused, "I'm so sorry about Toby, Spencer."
Spencer closed her eyes, "Thank you. I…I don't want to talk about that right now. It's…just too much and we have other things to be…discussed."
"Of course," Mary complied, "Whatever you need."
Silence filled the air. Alison entered the room, placing the coffee's on the coffee table before them, remaining standing.
"Should I go?" she asked awkwardly.
Mary looked to her and sighed, "No, Alison. I told you I'd tell you everything too…" she looked at Spencer, "If that's okay with you?"
Spencer looked at Alison and nodded, "Sure, it's your family too."
Mary watched as Alison took a seat beside Spencer and both young women watched her expectantly. Mary thought long and hard.
"I don't know where to start," she confessed.
Spencer thought for a moment, "My parents told me you met my dad at a bar. That he's Charlotte's father too."
Alison looked surprised, "Mr Hasting's is Charlotte's dad?" she asked Mary.
"Yes… yes, that's true," Mary confirmed, "He and your mother had had some kind of fight from what I remember. I had just got out of Radley. I was a young woman and I'd spent the better part of my youth in that place. I'd never… " she shook her head, "I'd never had those kind of…relations. When your father showed interest… I responded."
"And then? You ended up in Radley again, right? I don't understand. What was… " Spencer hesitated, "I mean, did they diagnose you?"
"Jessica found out I'd slept with Peter. She was furious. I didn't understand why at the time, but I later found out that she had been having an affair with him," she paused, flinching, "I'm sorry, I don't know if you knew – "
"I knew," Spencer cut in, "I mean, I know he's Jason's father and I know that it was more than a one time thing. So, she had you committed because she was… jealous?"
"I suppose so," Mary said monotonously, "As for my…diagnosis," she spoke bitterly, "It changed over the years. They thought I was psychotic, only someone who was psychotic would hurt a baby… but I never did," she growled slightly, "but nobody believed me. Then they diagnosed me with Intermittent Explosive Disorder… which I suppose wasn't far from the truth. I would get angry and throw things around. I would try to convince the doctors' that I wasn't unwell, that Jessica was telling lies. So then of course, I had schizophrenia. Depression. Bipolar. I think I've been through the whole book."
"Do you believe any of them were true?" Spencer asked quietly.
Mary's face fell as she took a deep breath, "The depression, I suppose I believe. I was on my best behaviour for over a year. Model patient. Eventually, the doctors' convinced Jessica to take me in. She was in charge of my care, had been for years, our parents died young… I ran into Peter, your father, in town. He was the only man I'd ever… had any kind of real feelings for. We caught up a few times, purely platonic. He'd complain about his marriage, I'd complain about Jessica. One night, we were drinking… I've never been very good at knowing when to stop…and well, we spent another night together."
Spencer was transfixed by the history she'd never known, "And you got pregnant… again. Did you…did you love him?"
Mary's face clouded, "I think… I thought I did," she whispered, "When I told Jessica I was pregnant, she was so, so angry. I wanted to tell your father, to work something out with him. I wanted to keep you. I wanted you to be my new beginning…"
Spencer broke her gaze, looking away and fighting the tears that threatened to spill, "What happened?"
"Jessica forbid me to tell Peter," Mary muttered, "She said if I did she would have me re-committed. Little did I know, she was going to do that anyway. She didn't like me being around Charles. He was getting too old, she said, he'd start to have memories of me soon. She was his mother, she said. His only mother."
"So you didn't tell… anyone?" Spencer asked.
"No, I didn't," Mary confirmed, "Then Jessica told me I would have to be sent away again. I couldn't bring this… shame on her family. People were already asking her about my stint in a nuthouse, as they liked to call it. They were bound to ask questions about a new baby. Kenneth was slightly more tolerant but that ended too when she told him and the doctors…"
Spencer and Alison exchanged glances, looking back to Mary curiously.
"What did she tell the doctors', Aunt Mary?" Alison asked.
Mary's shoulders heaved up and down as she took a deep breath, "One day, Charles was playing outside. He tripped and had a graze over his forehead. She grasped the opportunity and told the doctors I… I hurt him," she choked out, clearing her throat, "I would never lay a hand on either of my children."
"That's how she got you sent away," Alison's mind was reeling, "That's so… evil."
Mary wiped her eyes, "At that point, I knew I'd never get out. I thought Jessica would take the baby. I didn't even know that Peter knew about the baby until after you were taken from me. After that, I fell into a deep depression. Post-natal depression, they called it at first. But it never went away."
"Is that why…" Spencer stopped, looking at her hands in her lap.
Mary frowned, "What is it?"
"Why you got electro-shock therapy?" Spencer said quietly.
Mary closed her eyes, exhaling, "Yes and no. The doctors let me out for weekend release. Jessica agreed to it if I promised not to go to Rosewood. I broke that promise. Nearly got caught out by Jason. She was furious. She told the doctors' I'd attempted to take my own life and signed for the electro-shock therapy."
"But you didn't try to… kill yourself?" Spencer asked.
Mary sighed, "The irony is, I did. After the therapy. The first course was… a horrible experience, you can't even imagine… I begged Jessica not to sign on for another course. I told her I'd stay put and I'd be good but the second course was administered anyway."
"But you got out…" Alison wondered aloud.
"Yes, for a number of years I stopped fighting… then I would remember I had two babies out there and one I'd never even held," her eyes shone with tears as she looked at Spencer, "So I fought to get better. Time's changed and even Radley couldn't find any reason to keep me locked up. They were making an effort to sharpen their image," she rolled her eyes, "So, I floated in and out of institutions for a while."
"You never came to find me," Spencer said quietly, sadly.
Mary blinked out a tear, "I did. You and Charles. Jessica had told me Charles was dead. I believed her. She even had records. I wanted to see you, Spencer. I was just so afraid of my sister, of the things she'd done to me… of what would happen if I upset her. She told me to leave Rosewood and never return. And I did. But I did come and see you. I saw you with the Hastings. You seemed happy. They looked at you like they loved you. They had that beautiful house. I thought… they could take better care of you than I ever could."
Spencer swallowed her tears, "I wasn't always happy," she whispered, "I grew up feeling like I didn't belong. Like Melissa was the favourite. I didn't know why, I just didn't… fit."
"I'm so sorry," Mary brushed at her own tears, "I know it's years too late but Spencer," she took her daughters' hands, "I have always loved you. I will always love you."
Spencer looked at their hands and then up to Mary's watery eyes, her own vision blurring through tears. She wrapped her arms around her mother. Mary was surprised but quickly returned the action and pulled the younger woman into her arms, finally holding her daughter after all these years.
Alison nodded and quietly left the room. She'd heard enough.
"I'm so, so sorry," Mary cried, holding onto her daughter tightly.
"I know," Spencer whispered, "It's okay."
Mary wiped her eyes as she pulled back, "How?" she asked, "How is it possibly okay? I'm your mother. I'm meant to protect you – "
"You did," Spencer said, "Jenna was about to kill me. You saved my life."
"But sooner, I could have… I should have… "
"Mary, if anyone can understand doing things you shouldn't do because someone else has complete control of your life… it's me. Us. The girls. We lived like that for a few years. You lived like that…your whole life," Spencer shook her head, "Of course I wish things were different. That I'd known sooner. But I can't blame you for yielding to it… to someone else's… "
"I will never leave you again," Mary promised in a hushed whisper.
"You didn't leave me," Spencer's lips hinted at a smile, "I was taken. That's a pretty big difference."
Mary smiled, her hands on either side of Spencer's face, "You are such a beautiful, young woman. My baby girl. I thought back then, that you could be my new beginning but perhaps now we can both have one," she hesitated, "Wherever you want to go from here," she said softly, "I will respect your wishes but please, just know I will always love you. Now, ten years, twenty years from now. I'll always be here for you. All you have to do is call."
Spencer looked into her mother's eyes in silence a while.
"I want…" she stammered, "I want to know you. This whole thing is just so complicated and there's so much going on right now… I just need things to go slowly."
Mary nodded, "I understand," she spoke softly, "At your own pace. If you have anything you want to know, I'm here. An open book."
Spencer nodded slowly, "Thank you. For…saving my life, for being so honest."
"Where have you been? You're meant to be resting – "
"I went to see Mary," Spencer said tiredly as she trudged through the lounge.
"Spencer – "
"Please, mom," Spencer sunk down onto the couch, "No lectures. No concern. I can't deal with any more right now."
Veronica nodded, "Okay," she whispered, "Just tell me what I can do, honey."
Spencer lay her head in her mom's lap, "Just… be here."
"Always," Veronica promised.
"Just tell me that I'm wrong," Spencer held back tears, "when I think that life is just a miserable punishment. That nothing is fair. That happiness and safety is just a pipe dream," she couldn't help sobbing now, "That the good guys never win."
Veronica was choked up, seeing her daughter so distraught, "Honey, I wish I could change things for you but please, don't lose hope."
"Eternal misery," Spencer corrected through her tears, "Just look at Toby," she whispered, "A whole new life right around the corner…"
"You're right. Sometimes life isn't fair," Veronica pulled her daughter in her arms, "But sometimes it is extraordinary. And you know Toby only ever wanted the very best for you. He would want you to do what you always do – pick yourself up with that incredible strength that burns inside you. And know that the moments we share with the people we love have to be worth the pain we go through."
Spencer smiled a little, wiping her cheeks, "I know, I just...need to hold onto the pain a little longer."
"I love you, Spencer," Veronica said, "Always have, always will."