AN: Well this is kinda long-ish and I was debating whether or not to make this a multi-chapter story, but I decided this works on it's own. Enjoy.

Disclaimer: I do not own Pokemon.

Super Dopey Sidekick

It was another gorgeous day in Pallet town. The Pidgey were singing, the sun was shinning, and Team Rocket was blasting off again into the great blue yonder.

"Ow! Ow! Ow!" Meowth howled as he skidded across the forest floor on his bottom before crashing into a tree. His companions, Jessie and James, rolled along the ground until they hit the same tree, Jessie lying on top of James. The three of them would have been horribly injured had they not made roughly six-hundred and twenty-two crash landings in the past six years. If nothing else, they had learnt how to survive their trips into the stratosphere.

"That sucked," Jessie moaned, getting to her feet.

"Technically, it blew," James corrected, crawling away from the tree so that Meowth could get up, "Who knew the twerp would reunite with his old Pidgeot?"

"It wouldn't have been a problem if you woulda used dat steel net instead of da regular one," Meowth muttered.

"Don't pin this on him!" Jessie chided, "You were the one who decided that a Meowth-shaped balloon was an ideal way to travel!"

"You were da one dat agreed with me!" Meowth shot at the red-head, clearly annoyed.

"Only because you threatened to claw us it we didn't!" James pointed out, "And I didn't see you doing anything productive after that blasted bird pecked our pokemon back to their balls!"

"Yeah, and you were Mr. Hero, huh, cowering in da corner of da basket?" Meowth spat. James blushed furiously as he tried to think of a comeback.

"Well, what would you do if Seviper and Carnivine came hurling at you in the balloon, huh?" Jessie defended James. The trio of inept thieves argued like this for another ten minutes before Jessie and James volunteered to go hunt down the balloon, leaving Meowth to establish a campsite in the clearing.

"Lousy humans," Meowth muttered, "Can't do a thing right," he said to himself, shaking his head as he dug a fire pit, "And den deys have da nerve to blame Meowth for dere problems," he complained to himself. It wasn't his fault that the Pidgeot pecked a hole in the net, freeing the twerp's other pokemon. That was James's fault for not using the reinforced net, though apparently Jessie was too thick-headed to see that. Then again, Meowth mused, lately Jessie had been too thick-headed to see a lot of the mistakes James made in their attempts to capture Pikachu. She must be sick or something', Meowth guessed. He couldn't come up with any other reason for her behaviour. The tough-as-nails Jessie that he knew would have whacked James upside the head with a mallet for his latest mistake. Lately she had rarely laid a finger to their blue-haired companion.

Meowth thought on this for awhile as he prepared the fire. While James seemed relatively safe from Jessie's mallets and paper fans, Jessie had no qualms about using the aforementioned weapons on Meowth. And lately, even James had began taking Jessie's side more and more. Normally, Meowth and James got along better than two peas in a pod, often secretly uniting against their unruly companion. Now James sided with Jessie on everything. What was the deal???

Jessie and James returned a couple hours later, looking slightly dishevelled, carrying their deflated balloon.

"What happened to youse guys?" Meowth asked, taking in the leaves and grass sticking to their uniforms.

"Uh…um…" James stammered.

"The balloon was up in a tree and it took awhile to get down," Jessie told him, unabashed.

"Uh, okay," Meowth said, focusing on the relief that overtook James's face. Why does he look so relieved? Meowth wondered, frowning.

"James, why don't you go cook the noodles we stole from the twerp's mom's house? We do need our strength," Jessie suggested, looking pointedly at the male, yet she was also smirking slightly.

"Sure, Jess!" James said, hopping to attention and doing what he was told. Meowth frowned again. James never obeyed Jessie's commands that eagerly or enthusiastically. Maybe it was the prospect of food.

"TEAM ROCKET'S BLASTING OFF AGAIN!" the trio shouted as they were hurled through the air over Viridian City as they once again unsuccessfully tried to steal Pikachu. Meowth and James landed in a slough.

"Yuk! Dis sucks! Meowth hates water, 'specially wet, grimy water!" Meowth pouted, clinging to James's head as the young man walked to dry land.

"James! Get me down from here!" Jessie's voice screeched from a nearby tree. Both males looked towards her and Meowth's face broke out into a grin seeing Jessie hanging by her uniform in a tree. He snickered as he watched some curious Weedle and Caterpie creep closer to her. James, however, didn't laugh. He set Meowth on the ground and went about helping her down, as if it were a very serious situation.

Meowth quizzically watched the pair. Normally James would have been just as amused as Meowth to see Jessie in this predicament, yet he gently helped her to the ground. And Jessie normally would have refused any sort of help, insisting that she could help herself, yet she had called out to James. What was wrong with them?

"Ugh, James, you smell like a sewer!" Jessie cringed, pulling away from him.

"Oh, sorry!" James said quickly, removing his white Team Rocket jacket and started to take off his t-shirt when Jessie stopped him.

"Let's go steal you some dry clothes before you start stripping here…in front of Meowth," Jessie said pointedly. Meowth cocked his head slightly as understanding dawned on James's face.

"You know, Jess, I think you may have torn your uniform. We should steal you something while we get that patched up," James told her. Jessie nodded.

"Good idea," she agreed, and then turning to Meowth, she said, "We're going to go steal some clothes. We should be back in an hour."

"Or two," James added, grinning as he followed Jessie away from the cat, who looked slightly hurt at the exclusion. Jessie and James seemed to leave him alone more and more. They were always running off into the bush together and they always gathered firewood together, leaving the cat alone at their camp. If they didn't want him around, they could just say so, he thought, dejectedly making a fire pit. Maybe that was why they were ganging up on him. Maybe they didn't want him around anymore. That thought definitely stung. For years, he, Jessie, and James stood by each other. They were like family. Why would they want to suddenly kick him out of that family?

"We'll go get some water from that stream we saw," James announced the next day after the trio had been blasted through Viridian Forest by the twerp's Totodile.

"Why don't you go spy on the twerp's camp until we get back?" Jessie suggested, not giving Meowth time to respond before she and James dashed off.

Meowth sighed sadly as he watched the pair go before he turned to go spy on the twerp's campsite.

Ash was lounging on his sleeping bag, waiting like a prince as Brock cooked dinner for him and Misty. Apparently, after a couple of years of competing through various countries, Ash had decided to try once more in the Indigo League. Meowth watched as Misty sat next to Ash and as the future Pokemon Master wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling her closer. Huh, Meowth thought, his eyes widening, apparently the thick-headed kid finally wised up to the fact that Misty was hopelessly in love with him.

"Pika pika pi," Meowth jumped a mile high when he heard Ash's Pikachu beside him.

"What did you do dat for?" Meowth hissed, clutching his heart.

"Pi Pi Pika chu chu," the rodent replied.

"You saw me and thought I looked sad?" Meowth questioned, "Well, I've got news for you, Pal, I'm not sad and I'm gonna catch ya and take ya to da boss!" he said gruffly. Pikachu smiled patronizingly at the cat and patted his arm.

"Pika pi chu pika," he said, "Pika Pika pi chu pika pi."

Meowth slumped down to the ground in sadness and replied, "I dunno where Jessie and James are. They keep leaving me alone," he admitted.

"Pi?"

"I dunno why dey do it, but dey do it! All da time. They go off together to get firewood or to get da balloon or to get water. Half da time, dey don't even come back with what dey said dey were getting. I tink dat dey wanna get rid off me," Meowth admitted, his lower lip shaking.

"Pikaa," Pikachu said sympathetically, "Pi pika chu PikaPi chu PiPikaPi chu pika pi chu."

"Huh? You went through da same ting when Ash and Misty started dating? They left you alone a lot?" Meowth asked.

"Pika," Pikachu nodded, "Pi Pikachu pi pi chu chu," he said.

"You tink dat once I find out why Jessie and James are actin' weird, I'll see dat it's all just a misunderstanding?" Meowth clarified.

"Pi!" Pikachu nodded happily.

Once again, Team Rocket was sent hurling through the sky, this time over Pewter City, blasted by Pikachu. Sure, the rat had comforted Meowth the previous night, but neither Meowth nor the electric mouse would stop tormenting each other. It was just one of those things, like Growlithes and Persians, Seviper and Zangoose, Jessie and Cassidy… no one knew how the rivalry started, but just continued the hate-hate relationship nonetheless.

Anyhow, after the bumbling team recovered from their crash landing and had their usual post-blast-off feud, Jessie and James quickly volunteered to fetch some wood. Meowth nodded, though they didn't seem to pay him any attention.

"Alright, it's time to get to da bottom of dis," Meowth said, using his stealthy cat skills to follow Jessie and James through the forest. He watched as Jessie walked along and as James gathered some small sticks and branches. Meowth smirked. He should have known that James would be forced to do most of the work.

"What are you doing?" Jessie asked, raising her eyebrows at her partner as they stopped walking in a secluded clearing.

"Creating our alibi," James said proudly, dumping the sticks in a pile, "Meowth would wonder if we came back empty handed," he told her. Meowth's heart sank. They were plotting and sneaking behind his back. Jessie smiled at him.

"My, my, my, look at you, using that pretty little head of yours," she simpered, sidling up to James, "I think you deserve some kind of a reward for that," she said, putting her arms around his neck. Meowth cocked his head in confusion. James grinned in response.

"What's my prize?" he asked playfully, in a voice Meowth had never heard him use before.

"Me," she answered, closing the gap between them, her lips meeting his in a passionate kiss. Meowth's eyes bugged out of his head as he watched his human partners make out with each other. He stuffed his paws in his mouth to keep from making any noise.

"I'm…sorry…I screwed up today," James muttered between kisses.

"Stop talking," Jessie demanded, parting enough from him to remove his shirt, "I can think of a million better uses for your mouth," she said, catching his lips once more as she flung his shirt to the ground. Meowth lost track of James's hands as they slid under Jessie's top. This was Meowth's cue to get out of dodge. He high-tailed it back to their clearing, still reeling at what he had just witnessed.

Why had he never considered the possibility that Jessie and James were leaving him alone so that they could go at it like a couple of Bunnery? It was just…not plausible! He had always thought James was scared of girls and only liked them for their clothes. And Jessie…well, she just didn't usually go for the sensitive types like James. Big jerks were usually her guy of choice.

Meowth sat stunned until Jessie and James returned, their clothes dirty with leaves, James carrying an armful of wood. Meowth looked closer at the pair and noticed that Jessie's lipstick was smudged and that James's hair was sticking up at the back. How had Meowth never noticed these signs before?

"Well, I'll cook up those sausages we found," James volunteered working over the fire. Meowth nodded mutely. Jessie smiled adoringly at James for a moment until she moved to set up her sleeping bag.

"You're quiet, Meowth," James observed as he held the frying pan over the fire.

"Just…just…" the cat couldn't find the words. For the first time in his life (since he had learned to talk, anyways), he was speechless.

"Cat got your tongue?" James asked, smirking, but allowing the cat to sit in silence. The three of them ate dinner together, Meowth still stunned into silence. Then James put out the fire and they curled up in their respective sleeping bags.

Sleep did not come to the scratch-cat. He was still marvelling at the fact that Jessie and James were having a secret affair, deluding everyone, including him, their best friend and partner in crime. He was also slightly afraid of what he might see if he closed his eyes. He had no desire to picture Jessie and James in the middle of their amorous activities. At around one am (at least, that's what James's wristwatch said), Meowth heard Jessie wake with a start. He heard as she unzipped her sleeping bag and stumbled in the dark to where James was laying. Meowth watched, his cat eyes half open, as she unzipped James's sleeping bag and crawled in with him.

"What are you doing?" he heard James mumble sleepily.

"Can't sleep," she whispered, kissing him. Meowth prayed to every god he knew that they wouldn't do anything in camp. His prayers went unanswered as James responded to her and continued to make out with her. Meowth clenched his eyes shut as he heard James groan and Jessie's little gasps of pleasure.

"Ssshhh," James whispered, "We don't wanna wake Meowth," he reminded her. How considerate, Meowth thought dryly, thanks for thinking of me as you fornicate next to me. He cringed as he heard both of his partners stifle little gasps and then collapse on each other.

One word kept running through the cat's head as he listened to his partners snuggle closer (if that were possible) and doze off: blackmail.

Unlike Jessie and James, Meowth did not get any sleep. He had heard Jessie wake, kiss James once, and move back to her own sleeping bag. He also heard James get up an hour later, kiss her on the forehead, and then the pair of them stole away into the trees. Meowth groaned unhappily as he fixed the coffee over the fire. He'd need the whole batch if he was going to have a productive day.

As it turned out, Meowth had a very unproductive day. Once again, he and his team were sent skyrocketing through the air.

"Well, I guess me and Jessie ought to go gather some firewood," James said offhandedly. Meowth rolled his eyes. Honestly, they were like animals.

"Why don't you take Meowth?" Jessie suggested, kneeling to the ground, "I'll stay and do the fire," she said, though both James and Meowth could see through her smile.

"Uh…okay," James said, confusion and concern lacing his voice, "C'mon then, Meowth," he called to the cat.

"Sure," Meowth said, bounding after James, wondering why Jessie decided to skip out on her afternoon romp with James. James seemed to be wondering the same thing, as he was quiet, contemplative.

"So Jess must be sick of firewood duty," Meowth said after the silence became too much, but he immediately regretted it when he saw his friend's face fall. He had forgotten that 'firewood' was their code-word for 'let's ditch Meowth and go have sex'.

"Uh…maybe," James responded.

"Probably just needed a break," Meowth corrected hastily, "She'll probably be running back here with ya tomorrow," he said. A small smile formed on James's face before he frowned again, this time in confusion.

"Yeah…listen, Meowth, Jess and I…" James paused thinking of the right words. Meowth cocked his head, wondering if James was going to divulge to him about his not-so-secret rendezvous.

"Well, we're sorry if it seems like we're leaving you alone a lot," he said, "We just wanted to give you a break from all the chores we make you do," he told him. Meowth nodded, but James couldn't see his frown. James, his best buddy in the whole world, wouldn't share his secret with him, even to the point of lying to him.

"Heh, no biggie. Gives me time to think," Meowth shrugged, bounding off in search of more wood.

When James and Meowth returned to camp, they found Jessie feeding her Seviper as Mime Jr mimicked her every move. Meowth raised an eyebrow. Usually Mime Jr mimicked Meowth or James. It was through the mimic-pokemon that James and Meowth saw that Jessie was frowning, disturbed. Meowth focused his efforts on starting the fire, pretending to be more engrossed in his task than watching as James approached Jessie as she fed a morsel of pokemon chow to Mime Jr. Meowth, with his super hearing, heard James whisper to Jessie.

"Come out tonight with me? I know the perfect spot," he whispered.

"Sure," Jessie agreed quietly. Meowth's attention peaked.

The three ate dinner together, as always, and sat around the campfire together. Meowth could tell that James was impatient, longing to take Jessie to wherever he had in mind. He excused himself, saying that he needed his beauty rest. He feigned sleep, and after a half-hour, James led Jessie into the dark forest, using their flashlight for light. Meowth immediately got up to follow, grabbing a camera as he went.

"Where are we going?" Jessie asked.

"You'll see," James promised. Meowth could sense his excitement.

"James…" Jessie groaned as he led her through the trees and into a clearing on a cliff edge.

"Here," James said proudly, "Look," he told her. The view was awe-inspiring. Meowth could see the large full moon, perfectly round in the sky, surrounded by billions of stars.

"Wow," Jessie breathed, taking in the view.

"Sit," James said as he pulled her to the ground in front of him. They sat together on the ground, Jessie leaning against James's chest as his arms circled her. Meowth snapped a quick picture.

"It's beautiful, James," Jessie said softly.

"Makes you feel like we really can extend our reach to the stars above, doesn't it?" James asked, grinning. Jessie laughed. Meowth smirked, remembering that old line in their old motto.

"I suppose it does," she agreed, her voice sounding tired. James kissed the back of her head.

"The dreams again?" he whispered into her hair. Meowth crinkled his face in confusion as he scurried up a tree to get a better view of the pair. What dreams?

"Yeah," Jessie replied, laying her head back in the crook of his shoulder.

"About your mom?" James asked.

"Yeah," Jessie confirmed, "but they've changed."

"To what?" James prodded. Jessie's demeanour suddenly changed and she leaned forward, away from him. He tightened his hold on her.

"It's nothing," she told him.

"It's something," he corrected, "Jess, you can tell me," he assured her, resting his chin on her shoulder.

"It starts the same, with my mother walking away from me and then Madam Boss appears and…shoots her," Jessie explained, her face contorted in pain. Meowth felt pity for her. That couldn't be a pleasant dream.

"And then?" James asked, pushing a strand of red hair from her face. Jessie took a deep breath.

"And then I wake up," Jessie said quickly, once again trying to pull away from him. James held her tighter.

"Jessica Musashi Lillis," he said firmly, "Tell me. I want to help."

"Fine," Jessie growled, focusing her eyes upwards "Madam Boss turns into Giovanni and my mother…turns into…you," she managed to get out.

"Jess, it was just a dream. That won't happen-" James tried to assure her.

"How can you say that, James?" she asked, turning in his arms to look at him, "How can you say it won't happen? We've been after that blasted Pikachu for six years and for six years we've failed. It's a miracle that we're still alive now. It's only a matter of time before all of that does happen," she told him, tears leaking out her eyes. She angrily wiped them away. James caught her hand in his and kissed it.

"It won't happen because I won't let it," he said softly, but firmly, "Nothing, not even a bullet, could keep me away from you. I love you," he admitted, causing Meowth's eyes to widen. He didn't know that they were in love. He had thought they were just trying to satisfy their raging hormones.

"You say that now-"

"And I'll be saying it forever," James cut across her, "I love you and I want to be with you all the time, every minute of the day. I want to make you happy and hold you when you cry. I want-"

"I don't cry," Jessie interrupted. Meowth frowned. Stubborn girl.

"Everyone cries, Jess, even you," James said in response, "And that's okay. You don't always have to be so strong."

"Yes, I do," Jessie corrected, "I need to."

"You can't be Superwoman all of the time, Jessie," James argued, "Sometimes you need someone to pick you up and help you carry the world. I can do that for you, Jess. I want to do that for you. I want to be your Superman," he told her. Meowth felt tears run down his face at James's words. He was such a hopeless romantic. It was so beautiful.

"That is so corny," Jessie replied, reaching up to wipe a tear from her eye. James beat her to it.

"Yeah, I know," he chuckled, "But all of it's true. If I could, I'd pick you up right now and fly you far away from everything, up to the moon and past the stars."

She kissed him once and rested her forehead on his.

"I think it's time to come back down to earth, Superman," she told him, "You and I aren't superheroes…we aren't even super villains. We're just…average. Insignificant."

"Okay," James allowed, his smile never dimming, "I'll be Clark Kent to your Lois Lane, then," he replied. Meowth smirked a watery smile. Who knew Jimmy could be such a romantic?

"What am I going to do with you?" Jessie growled in mock-exasperation.

"Kiss me? Love me?" he suggested. Jessie chuckled.

"Yes to all of the above," she replied, kissing him passionately.

"Run away with me?" James murmured into her mouth.

"That could be arranged," Jessie allowed before latching her mouth to his.

"Marry me?" he then whispered between kisses, so softly that Meowth's ears barely caught it. The cat's eyes widened as Jessie pulled away to look at her lover.

"What?" she asked, sounding just as shell shocked as Meowth felt.

"Marry me?" James asked again and then said, "I know it seems crazy, but I love you and I want to marry you and have a family with you and maybe buy a little house in the country with you that has a cat-flap for Meowth. Please marry me?"

It took a moment for Jessie to reply with a breathy, "Yes."

Meowth grinned. They did want him! He couldn't contain the sob that shook his tiny little body off of the tree limb and caused him to fall in between Jessie and James.

"MEOWTH!?" Jessie and James cried in shock as they broke apart, staring at the crying cat in between them.

"What are you doing here?" James asked, stunned as he looked down at his friend.

"Um…uh…congratulations?" Meowth stammered, looking like a Stantler caught in the headlights.

"WERE YOU SPYING ON US?" Jessie shrieked. Meowth said the first thing that came to his head.

"I get a cat flap?"

He didn't see the mallet coming.

James scratched the back of his head as he watched the cat soar across the night sky, "Well, I guess one of us literally got to fly to the moon and past the stars."

"Do we have to have the cat flap?" Jessie muttered through clenched teeth. He laughed and kissed her temple.

"'Fraid so," James replied, "Every superhero team needs a super dopey sidekick."

"And Meowth's ours?" Jessie questioned, turning to wrap her arms around his neck.

"Meowth is most definitely ours," James confirmed, laughing as he leaned down to kiss her.

The End