They say our ambitions and goals are always at our fingertips, all we have to do reach that little bit further. I've always lived by that statement, a simple recognition that I could achieve anything I set my mind too, if I could be bothered to reach that tiniest bit further. And if I didn't want to, a simple command towards Sebastian would have the goal achieved without even a hand raised towards it.
But to have a life goal right in front of me, at the very edge of my finger tips, was not something I expected to encounter. This wasn't a situation where I could use my most valuable pawn to do my bidding. No, I had to save Elizabeth from this mess myself. To show a lack of independence towards Elizabeth's rescue would prove cowardice or plain indifference towards her entirely, the exact opposite of my feelings for her. If I, Ciel Phantomhive, couldn't protect the one person closest to me... Could I really call myself a Phantomhive at all?
Every moment I wasted led to another quick brush of our finger tips, another minor failure of grasping her gloved hand in my own completely. Being submerged so heavily under waves of soil-ridden waters was only another trigger for my asthma, coughs and splutters interrupting and preventing me from my goal of grabbing her. I could feel water filling up my lungs indefinitely, eyes straining to see through the liquid doom clear enough. Blonde hair was fading further and further away, regardless of how hard my legs pumped against the current, a futile attempt to reach her before I no longer had breath to continue.
I could feel the oxygen within me drain away to it's last, humble breath as my hand finally grasped her's, a preemptive gasp of accomplishment escaping my blue, asphyxiated lips. An error in judgement, allowing more of the murky water to enter my already contaminated insides. Cerulean eyes shot open wide at the impact, the last visual they were greeted with being the pure white gleam of her slender, gloved hand, a spark of hope in the murky definition of depravity.
One thought alone dared to sprout beside the ambition of protecting Elizabeth. A thought of pure and utter dependence, even if it sickened me, the idea that I couldn't do anything without the help of another person. But surely, as long as my hand gripped my paramour's tightly, Sebastian would save us both from this watery tomb he had created. It was the least he could do, after causing more of a catastrophe instead of stopping it entirely. Weakness it portrayed from me, but I was still protecting the one I cared about if we both survived.
Wait, if?
No... When. There was no possible way for me to fail. My most usable pawn would undertake their one true command and protect us both. He had to...
... Right?