Disclaimer: I, obviously, don't own anything associated with Charlie and the Chocolate factory.

A/N: This is my first fanfiction, so I apologize if it sucks. I normally keep things like this locked away in my Yahoo notepad, but I think the world needs more dark Willy Wonka fanfiction.

Warnings: Underage, slash, possible blood and gore in later chapters (if I decide to get off my lazy ass and write them).

I hope you find this delightfully dreadful and that if offends your senses in all the right ways. :)

He wasn't supposed to be "Charlie Bucket". He was supposed to be like every other normal thirteen year-old and enjoy things like smart phones, video games and pretending not to notice girls his age existed. Other teenagers wouldn't have obsessed this much over simple candy bars, but, most teenagers weren't lucky enough to have a natural talent for acting, so some concessions had to be made. Unfortunately, "Charlie Bucket" wasn't just another mask to don for movie scenes, it had become his sole identity. Forget all of the newest gadgets, and, to hell with other distractions of the modern world, "Charlie" only wanted his candy-coated fantasy to be real.

Looking ravishing in a black top-hat and cherry plush coat, Johnny Depp knew he looked good enough to eat, but he couldn't fathom why his young co-star was gazing at him with such desperately manic eyes. He knew the young boy seemed to be losing his mind more and more with each passing day, but the director was adamant that nothing be done about it to insure every scene looked as natural as possible. If the child actually believed he was really Charlie Bucket, then every note of laughter and every pearly white smile would be authentic and the movie might even win some sort of award.

They were shooting a very important scene today, in which, Willy Wonka announces to Charlie that he's won his entire factory and that he'll get to live there alongside the eccentric chocolatier. Everyone was prepared to be emotionally-taxed as scenes like these were extremely difficult to shoot; something was bound to go wrong at least once or twice. The director nodded at everyone to begin. "Charlie Bucket" smiled lovingly at Johnny Wonka, err, Johnny Depp and didn't look the least bit concerned when the affectionate gesture wasn't returned. In fact, Depp felt an icy shiver slither down his spine, and he most certainly could not wait to take off take these clothes and take five showers in a row. He might never truly be clean again after this wretched movie was done.

But, he put on his best glossy smile and plunged his mind temporarily into sugary oblivion. Maybe his sanity might intact after all, if he could just fake it for one for more week. No, strike that and reverse it. He'll never be sane after dealing with this "Charlie" lunatic, especially since he could no longer remember his co-star's name anyway.

"Charlie, how would you like to come live with me at my chocolate factory?" Depp asked in a nauseatingly saccharine voice. "Charlie" about lost his mind, jumping up and down with joy. He flung his arms around Depp, burying his head into the soft overcoat.

"Of course I will! I love it, and, I love you!" "Charlie" shrieked while nuzzling deeper into the coat. Nothing could describe the absolute euphoria pumping through his veins right now. He was going to live with Mr. Wonka, and eat all of the delectable goodies in the Chocolate Room, even though some of them had this strange plastic taste to them. The director shouted "CUT!" at the top of his lungs. His face looked like a bloated tomato, his teeth were bared and his eyes looked about to pop out of their sockets. He ordered Johnny Depp to take "Charlie" aside and talk some sense into him. Depp groaned inwardly, and vowed this was the last Tim Burton movie he would ever star in again. He untangled "Charlie" from his coat, but felt the young boy excitedly drag him out of the room.

Most of the Chocolate Factory had been re-created from the book with as much authenticity as possible. The sets had been arranged into twisted mazes and long, winding corridors. Depp frantically tried to catch his breath and maintain his balance while being forced to run down long hallways in high-heeled boots. "Charlie" flung open the door to the Chocolate Room and yanked Johnny Depp inside. The room was still garishly bright as usual, but most of the candy confections looked a little stale and the chocolate river was beginning to smell like sour milk. But, it still looked whimsical enough for "Charlie" to look around in awe, even though he had been in the room before hundreds of times. He pulled his idol up one of the minty-grass hills and plopped down, forcing his idol to sit down beside him.

"Charlie, you know I'm not really Willy Wonka, right?" Depp tried to say, but his voice cracked. All of the sugary aromas were beginning to flood his mind, overwhelming it. Even the river full of spoiled chocolate began to smell rich, delectable and smooth. He dipped his gloved hand into the river and licked a small amount of gooey chocolate off of his fingers. His tongue danced with delight, although his stomach gurgled riotously. Charlie leaned his head lazily against Depp's shoulder, contently sucking a lollipop. Johnny Depp closed his eyes for a moment. This was...troubling, to say the least. He was supposed to be lecturing his co-star, and instead here he was cuddling with him and eating candy. Even worse, he almost didn't mind, but this was the real world, not some mind-bending sugar fantasy. If he was going to say something, he had to say it now.

But, when Depp opened his eyes, he saw Charlie gazing at him with a look of quiet adoration. His blue eyes were sparkling with happiness and a shy, rosy blush dusted his cheeks. "Ever since I met you outside the factory gates, I've thought you were really pretty, Mr. Wonka!" Charlie said suddenly and then covered his mouth with his hands, in embarrassment. His idol merely gazed at him, not saying a word. Deciding that he needed to be more adventurous, Charlie placed a soft kiss on the reluctant chocolatier's cherry-red lips. Johnny Depp's felt as if his heart had gotten stuck in his throat. He felt blindingly dizzy and extremely uncomfortable. Yet, he could taste hints of raspberry, vanilla and some sort of spice in Charlie's kiss, and he decided he didn't mind it. His already cracked mind crumbled like a broken Wonka Bar and the pieces lost themselves in a swirling sugary void, almost reminiscent of the pattern on Charlie's lollipop. When Charlie finally pulled away, Willy Wonka thought he would never be able to catch his breath. He wasn't fond of being touched, but he grinned at the sight of his heir snuggling into his shoulder and realized he could make an exception just this once. Gently, he placed his hand under Charlie's chin and tilted it upwards so that his lavender eyes were intensely locked with Charlie's oceanic ones. "My dear boy, whatever are you going to do when your p-parents find out you've been stealing kisses from your friendly, neighborhood chocolatier?" Mr. Wonka hissed seductively, a smirk curling on his lips. Charlie thought for a moment before whispering "I'd drown them in the chocolate river for you, Mr. Wonka..." into his mentor's ear. Mr. Wonka let out a high-pitched, girlish giggle before sharply wrapping his arm around Charlies waist and pulling him in for a rough hug.

Mr. Wonka was so happy to find someone as crazy and obsessed with candy as he was; he just knew he and Charlie were going to be greatest of friends. He also knew things were about to get interesting. Oh yes, very interesting...