Disclaimer: I don't own One Piece.
That and I'm not a medical student so if stuff doesn't make sense... that's my defense. Internet only gets you so far.
Also, apologies if this triggers or anything, I'm not too sure but I don't think so...
Anyway, enjoy.
Wait, I forgot, there's a line I borrowed from another fic, You may be an idiot, dumb and suicidal but you're ours, Ace, so yeah, uh sorry to midnightluck, not sure if you have an account on coz I only got this from ao3, but yes, I love this line so much it stuck with me so I hope you don't mind...? Sorry, bad social skills... To everyone else who hasn't a clue what I'm talking about, go read 'wish by spirit and if by yes'. Uh yeah. Seriously tho, if it's a problem, pls let me know so I'll change it or something. Thank you...
Abandoned
He wasn't exactly sure when they started but once they had, he hadn't wanted them to stop. They were a buff from reality, soothing, calming and basically just something he used to keep himself sane. Which was actually kind of funny, now that he thought of it. After all, people who hallucinated weren't sane so hallucinating to keep yourself sane was rather ironic.
Sometimes, he had to wonder if he really did have brothers. After all, there was no way someone as bright as Luffy and as clever as Sabo would ever want to be his brothers, because well… no matter how he looked at it, he didn't really deserve brothers. But then he would firmly tell himself that they were real because there was no way he could imagine someone as bright as Luffy yet so ridiculously stupid. At that point, Sabo normally tended to butt in with a, "Well, yeah, but you can be pretty stupid sometimes too, Ace."
"Am not," Ace hisses at his top hat brother who is leaning against the doorway of his 'room'. He winces as he tends to the purpling bruise that is spreading across his cheek with some ice he managed to sneak from the kitchen.
"I'm not stupid!" Luffy complains, pouting from where he sits on Ace's bed, fiddling with his straw hat.
"You snapped at Mr. Denver," Sabo says exasperatedly, pushing off the wall to move closer to his brothers, apparently ignoring Luffy. "Look me in the eye and tell me that wasn't dumb."
He doesn't because he can't. Looking too closely at his brothers sometimes makes them blurry because five years is too long to remember everything, no matter how much he holds them dear.
"No Lu," Sabo says suddenly, looking over at their littlest brother. "You're not stupid but you do tend to do stupid things too."
"Shihihi! Sabo too!" Luffy laughs and Ace smiles because that laugh is the one thing he remembers clearly.
"Yeah, 'bo," Ace teases, looking up in the direction of his brother. "I can remember several stupid moments of yours too."
"Sh-shut up!" Sabo mutters, flustered.
Luffy laughs again and Ace smiles widely, his brother's laugh bringing a smile to his face before he winces because the smile stretches on his bruise.
"You should get to sleep," Sabo says, worry in his tone. "You've got school tomorrow."
"Yeah," Ace agrees. "I'm gonna be sore tomorrow."
"Isn't tomorrow P.E?" Luffy asks and Sabo and Ace groan simultaneously.
"I'm going to sleep now," Ace decides. Sabo pulls Luffy off his bed and they settle on his floor.
"Night, Ace!" Luffy chirps.
"We'll be here," Sabo promises quietly and Ace can't help the wry smile that crosses his lips.
"Of course," he agrees but from the way Sabo catches his eyes, he knows they both don't believe it because they all know that hallucinations don't exist when you're asleep.
He dreams of the orphanage and he's eleven again, helpless against the world. Luffy is clinging to his side and they're both staring at the two rich looking people who have come to claim Sabo. He's angry, upset because who are they to come claim Sabo like he's theirs? Sabo is his own person, has always been and more importantly, Sabo is his brother. But it doesn't seem to matter to these people because with a few words whispered in Sabo's ear, he gets ready to leave with a sad smile. But Ace won't let him go so easily.
"We made a promise, Sabo!" he yells at the blonde haired boy, uncaring of his 'parents' behind him who are looking on with annoyance. "Are you going to break our vow?"
"Ace," Sabo starts and he looks really helpless, caught between frustration and exhaustion. "I'm sorry but-"
Ace has heard enough. In a moment of anger and carelessness, he yells his next few words. "Then maybe you shouldn't be our brother anymore!"
He remembers seeing Sabo's face crumple before Sabo steels himself and smiles at him. It's fake and Ace hates it but Sabo is already saying goodbye. His last words make Ace regret his own, but Ace is far too stubborn and too angry to think straight and take them back.
"Ace, I'll always be your brother," Sabo tells him, looking both him and Luffy seriously in the eyes. "Even if you never want to see me again, I'll always be your brother. I promise."
His voice cracks on the last word and Sabo turns away, eyes scrunching up in an attempt to not cry and then he's leaving and he's not looking back.
Luffy cries for ages and Ace rages but there is nothing he can do. In the end, there are only two of them. It's enough, he thinks angrily. But when the anger has died down to an ache in his chest, he knows it'll never be enough.
His ribs hurt with every breath he takes and he guesses they're fractured.
"Go see the nurse," Sabo insists and while normally he'd retaliate with a scathing remark, he'd really rather not do it in public. While he knows he's crazy, he doesn't need everyone else to know it too.
"Just go, Ace," Luffy whines and Ace resists the urge to roll his eyes. He has a feeling they're picking on him more because he's in public and they know he won't fight back.
"If you don't go, Luffy'll cry," Sabo warns and sure enough, Luffy's brown eyes start to tear up.
Ace winces reflexively; he hates it when Luffy cries, especially when he's the one who made him cry. He knows he's done it plenty of times when they were younger.
"Fine!" he mutters angrily at his grinning brothers who are hovering at the corner of his eye. He glares sideways at them because, he hates going to the nurse. They ask all sorts of questions and what's he gonna tell them now? He's already 'fallen down the stairs' once.
"Tell them you fell again," Sabo suggests to Luffy's fervent agreement.
He can't think of anything better so he agrees. They give him funny looks when he does, but don't question it further. After all, the place where he's staying is filled with other rough, problematic kids. It's not a surprise if he fell accidently because kids will be kids. He doesn't tell them that there's just him now.
It's sometime in the evening when he wakes. The blankets are twisted up around him and it's hot, so hot. He blearily realises that he missed school, for some reason, he dimly recalls his alarm ringing but he just couldn't wake. His limbs feel weak and there's a pounding headache going on behind his eyes so he comes to the conclusion that he's sick. He really needs to cool down, he decides and with that thought in mind, he struggles to get up to go to the kitchen.
The house is quiet and still and he remembers that Mr. Denver has gone out. He's alone now.
"Ace looks sick!" he hears Luffy exclaim and he manages a grin. Right, not alone, not yet because he still has them.
""Yeah," he hears Sabo agree, with him or Luffy he's not altogether sure, but then Sabo continues. "You do look sick."
"That's because I am, geniuses," he croaks at them.
"He called me a genius!" Luffy exclaims excitedly and Sabo sighs as Ace laughs, albeit weakly.
"It's sarcasm, Lu," Sabo explains and Luffy tilts his head in bewilderment. "Never mind," Sabo sighs, giving up.
Ace ignores them for a few seconds in favour of frowning at the stairs. The kitchen is down there but the effort it would take just to get there is a little too much. He has to though. He really needs to cool down. Slowly, he takes it one step at a time, ignoring the way his vision is swaying. Sabo and Luffy have disappeared by then, it's hard to focus on his task and them at the same time so for the time being, they've left him alone. He's almost at the bottom of the stairs when his legs give way and he crashes down the last few steps. It's a short fall, but he can't stop his head from hitting the floor hard. Stars burst across his vision before it all fades to black.
He isn't entirely sure how long he's been out but it can't have been too long because the same evening light is still creeping across the floor. Everything hurts and he can't move because he's far too exhausted and did he mention that everything hurts?
He blinks his eyes slowly, staring at the door but not really registering it until he sees something strange. He'll admit, his vision is a bit blurry, but he'll swear there are two silhouettes at said door and they're trying to get in.
"Should I even want to know where you learned to pick locks?"
"Nami taught me," someone laughs and it's a very familiar laugh even if the voice is now deeper and older.
The lock clicks and the door swings open, letting the last rays of the evening sun in. It hits his eyes first and he squints and winces because his eyes hurt when the light shines into it, which is why he can't see who they are.
"Okay," the first voice decides. "Nami is good if she can actually teach you."
"Hey!" the second voice pouts, before his tone changes completely. "Ace? What happened?"
Ace frowns slowly because something doesn't add up but he replies like he's supposed to anyway. "I told you," he grumbles, eyes flickering shut. "I'm sick, genius."
There's the sound of running and someone crouches down beside him, brushing a hand gently over his forehead. Ace stills because it's the first time Luffy has ever touched him but he's sure they're still hallucinations. It's a nice change from the usual so he takes it as the opportunity it is and leans into the touch. It's when he does that he realises how long it's been since he had actual contact which isn't painful. Luffy's hand is cooling against his forehead and he says as much, murmuring the words.
Then, there's another hand on his skin, cupping the back of his head and feeling it gently. Pain erupts suddenly when the hand brushes a lump and he whimpers because it hurts.
"Sorry, Ace," Sabo apologises and something is different; his voice is deeper but... it's still Sabo so he really can't bring himself to wonder right now. "Lu, let's see if we can move him to the couch, I think he's got a concussion."
"What about the old man?" Luffy asks and his voice is serious for once, not whiny or child-like. "What if he comes back?"
"Mr. Denver is out for the weekend, remember?" Ace manages to mutter. "Did you forget, Lu?"
There's a hesitant pause, Ace isn't sure why, then Luffy is saying slowly, "No, why would I forget, Ace? I didn't know Mr. Denver was going to be away for the weekend."
"Yes, you do," Ace insists, trying to push through the pain to think clearly because something is obviously amiss. "You were there when he told us. You asked if we could go too and Sabo said no because he would never take us and I swore we'd go somewhere, just the three of us one of these days. Remember?"
"When was the last time you saw us, Ace?" Sabo is asking carefully and Ace has to wonder why. It's not like he'll break.
"Before I fell. You were saying I looked sick," he mumbles, frustrated but too exhausted to voice it. So he tells them petulantly instead, "You should remember this stuff since I still do…"
Then Luffy is asking Sabo what he means with a strange emotion that Ace can't place evident in his tone.
"How old are we, Ace?" Sabo questions and ignores Luffy for the time being. To Ace's surprise, there isn't a complaint from Luffy although there is a slight huff.
"Ace?" Sabo presses and he blurts out the answer.
"Lu's ten and you're eleven but only 'cause I don't know how you look like now."
There's a sharp intake of breath, from who he doesn't know, but then Luffy is helping him to his feet and supporting him when he feels his legs about to give way under him again.
"I'll get some water and a cloth," Sabo says, his voice sounding choked up, Ace doesn't know why- but before he can ask, Luffy is guiding him to the couch.
"You rest for now, Ace," Luffy tells him as he helps him to get comfortable on the couch. "We'll be here."
Ace's lips curl into a wry smile as he agrees. "Sure."
Luffy must have picked up on something in his tone because he's oddly insistent. 'No, really Ace, we will be."
"Right, Lu," he agrees, words slurring as he feels himself being dragged into sleep.
"Promise," Luffy is saying and he sounds desperate. "We won't leave you alone again, Ace."
He wants to question that because that means something, but sleep overtakes him and he loses himself to the darkness.
Luffy's sobbing loudly, he can hear him from where he's hiding but no matter how loudly Luffy cries for him, Ace grits his teeth and stays where he is.
It's been a year since Sabo left and they've grown closer, so close, Ace can't imagine what life would be like without Lu. He really can't. Luffy is the reason he drags himself out of bed each morning, the person he goes to for comfort even if his younger brother doesn't know it because he's stupidly dense that way, and the only treasure he has left.
But he's hiding away in a place he hopes Luffy can't find because today is the day Luffy's grandfather takes him home. And Ace is glad, he really is, Luffy is a good kid, he deserves a home, so much more than Ace does but he also knows that Luffy will not leave if he knows that Ace isn't coming with him. And Ace can't bear to see Luffy sacrifice his chance at a home to stay with him. So, he lets him go.
Luffy's wails are getting louder and a gruff voice is shouting, or maybe speaking loudly Ace isn't really sure. Ace clamps his hands over his ears and mentally tells Luffy to stop crying because he's nine so he ought to be a lot braver than seven and eight but still Luffy's cries leak through and each sound is a tug at his heart.
Then there's a loud thud, a yelp from Luffy and the crying stops. Ace is on his feet before he knows it and out the door to find Luffy because now his brother is whimpering and he knows that sound. Luffy is hurt.
He runs past familiar corridors before finally rounding to find Luffy in the living room, a giant man standing near him, fist held up and something within him reacts. He dashes across the room to stand between his brother and the man, arms held open wide and facing the stranger defiantly because he hurt Luffy.
There's a sobbed out, "Ace!" and Luffy launches himself at Ace's middle, dampening his shirt but Ace doesn't care. He merely uses one hand to pull Luffy to him protectively and murmurs softly, "Lu, you alright?"
"I'm fine. Gramps just hit me because he said I was too noisy," Luffy sniffles, sobs dying down as he begins to calm himself. "Where were you?"
Ace flinches against the petulant question, spoken almost accusingly and remembers exactly why he was hiding. Thankfully though, he's saved from answering because the man, Luffy's grandfather who has been eyeing him with open curiosity suddenly demands to know who he is.
"This is Ace!" Luffy tells him a mixture of pride and love in his voice. "He's my brother."
The sentence is spoken simply but still Ace pulls Luffy a little closer and maybe stands a little taller because he can't let his little brother down now, can he? Luffy's grandfather eyes him, still curious as he barks out a reply.
"You don't have a brother."
Luffy practically bristles with indignation like it's a personal assault against Ace, maybe it is… but Luffy is the one getting angry, not Ace.
"I do! I have Sabo and Ace and they're both my brothers!"
Ace stiffens at the mention of Sabo's name, it still hurts to think about him but Luffy is barrelling on, scowling as he defends his brothers.
"They're cool and strong and really brave! And they are so my brothers!"
Ace is caught between embarrassment and pride, so he stays silent hoping no one will comment on the blush creeping down to his neck. Unfortunately for him, Luffy's grandfather smirks and comments idly, "Cool, huh?" as he stares pointedly at Ace's blush, which only deepens.
"Shut up, shitty old man," Ace snaps, mostly out of embarrassment.
Luffy's grandfather's eyes bulge and Luffy laughs, repeating Ace's words cheerfully. "Shitty old man!"
"Shitty old man!?" he sputters. "I'm not that old!"
"You're Luffy's grandfather!" Ace points out; feeling smug. "And you have gray hair!"
"Since I'm older than you brat," he snaps, "You should show me some respect!"
His fist comes out of nowhere and connects with Ace's head. To his surprise, it really hurts. He yelps and pulls back, his unoccupied hand reaching up to rub at his head.
"Gramps!" Luffy exclaims. "Don't hit Ace!"
"You called me a shitty old man too, Luffy!"
This time, Ace is fast enough to dart between the incoming fist and his brother and even though it smarts, he blinks back tears and glares at the old man.
"Don't hit Luffy!"
The old man's eyes widen in surprise, just a little, before they narrow.
"You deserve that for teaching Luffy to call me that," he tells Ace and Ace blinks because it sounds like the old man is pouting.
"Garp, I thought you were going to take Luffy and leave, not cause a scene," their caretaker, Dadan grumbles as she bustles into the room.
Garp bursts out laughing, startling Ace but Luffy merely pouts and says, "I'm not leaving!"
Dadan glares at Luffy and says, "Yes, you are. Please, before you wreck the house."
Ace winces, knowing exactly what's going to happen next.
"No! I'm not leaving unless Ace comes too," Luffy stubbornly insists.
"Lu, we've talked about this before," Ace says awkwardly. "You can't-"
"I don't wanna leave you too, Ace!" Luffy shouts and something in Ace twists because there is helplessness in Luffy's eyes and Ace knows it shouldn't be there.
"I'll be fine, Lu," he tells his younger brother. "I can take care of myself. Way better than a cry baby like you," he adds. "I was taking care of myself just fine before you showed up."
"But Sabo-" Luffy tries to protest and Ace talks over the name.
"I was taking care of myself before that too."
He avoids Dadan's incredulous look because those were the days when he came home with more bruises and injuries than most kids his age.
"But-"
"I'm your big brother, Lu," he says exasperatedly. "I can look after myself. Besides, that why we made that vow and bond, right? So that, even if we aren't together, we are still brothers."
Luffy nods reluctantly.
"Now scram," Ace orders loftily like an older brother ought to, pushing away the pain knifing through his heart. "Visit me whenever but not every day and definitely not during school hours."
And Luffy leaves him by himself in the house with Dadan. Ace catches his eye as he glances back but Ace's resolve is like steel; Luffy needs a home, one Ace can't give or guarantee. After Luffy leaves, he has to remember how to breathe.
Sounds filter in like he's underwater, barest snatches of words that are disjointed and don't make sense. He blinks awake, gaze catching on a gray ceiling and there's some strange purring sound all around him. He's burning like there's an internal furnace trapped within his body, and it's so uncomfortable, not to mention the painful throbbing inflicted on his brain. Bone-aching tiredness tugs at him, wanting to pull him back into sleep's embrace but the sound of all-too-familiar voices urge him to stay awake. He lets his eyes slide shut halfway and listens, uncomfortable but content to hear his brothers talk.
"-can't believe it. He's barely got anything in that so-called-room of his. I can lend him some of my clothes, if not, we'll just buy some."
"When do you think the old man will come back?" Luffy asks and he sounds curious.
"Maybe Monday or late Sunday," Sabo replies, some of the irritation in his voice bleeding out and giving way to weariness.
"How long-?" Luffy begins but Sabo answers him before he can even finish the question.
"Probably late Sunday, if not just a little earlier. I don't want to risk Ace's health over the fact that we're the ones who're dragging him out of that hell-hole."
There's a heavy sigh from Luffy.
"But I want to spend more time with Ace…" he whines and Sabo's voice is just a little lighter when he promises, "One year. One year, then we'll never leave him alone ever again."
A cell phone beeps and there's the sound of someone tapping on a screen.
"Oh. Traffy says we should probably take him to the hospital and- Ah," Luffy sounds mildly curious. "Chopper's calling."
There's a moment of silence before Luffy speaks and he sounds really… happy.
"Chopper! What's up?"
A squeaky voice chirps over the phone. "Did you say your brother is hurt? Was he unconscious when you saw him? Is Sabo okay?"
Luffy laughs for some reason and Sabo sounds just a touch exasperated but fond as he replies, "Relax Chopper, I'm fine. It's our other brother that's hurt. And yeah, he was unconscious when we got there."
"Oh no!" Chopper's voice goes one pitch higher than Ace thought possible and he winces at the sound. He must have made a noise because Luffy exclaims suddenly and loudly, "He's awake!"
"Lu, what are you-"
There's a grunt and Ace feels someone manoeuvring around him to settle his head into their lap.
"Ace?" Luffy says, soft and gentle and Ace could never refuse his brother so he makes an answering sound.
"How is he, Luffy?" the person, Chopper, asks over the phone.
"Awake, but I think he's still in pain."
"You guys really need to get him to the hospital; it's the best thing-"
The h-word suddenly registers and he panics, jolting into a sitting position, clutching at his head and the head-splitting pain that erupts the second he's vertical, but all the while frantically telling them, "No! No hospitals!"
Voices blur as colours mash and he can barely distinguish Luffy from Sabo.
"Ace, what-"
"I'm pulling over!"
He gives into the black spots for a moment and when he resurfaces again, he's leaning against a broad shoulder with a hand carding through his hair.
"Why doesn't he wanna go to the hospital?" Luffy asks and he sounds shaken.
"…I don't really want to guess," Sabo says and his voice rumbles in his chest and Ace realises that he's leaning on Sabo which he hasn't done in like… forever. Actually, make that never. But still, it feels better when he rests his head on something and if that something happens to be Sabo's shoulder, well, he'll take what he can get. "Whatever it is, it can't be good."
"So what should we do?" Luffy asks quietly and Ace wants to reach out and hold his little brother because that's hurt he's hearing.
"Ask Law to see if he's got any advice on how to handle a concussion, then when Ace is lucid enough, we'll try taking him to the hospital," Sabo decides, an air of finality in his voice. "I don't want to force him into the whole hospital thing just yet."
There's a beat of silence then, Luffy asks, almost slyly, Ace is inclined to think, "Can I drive?"
Sabo groans, "No. I wish Zoro had never showed you how either."
Again, there's a feeling of misstep, like he's missing something, but Ace is far too tired and too muddled with pain to think. He slips slowly back into oblivion, barely aware that Luffy and Sabo have switched places and is lulled to sleep slightly faster by the sound of the car's engine restarting.
"Ace," someone is coaxing him awake. "Ace, c'mon, I need you to wake up."
"What's wrong with letting him sleep?" someone else is asking and Ace agrees with the person. At least someone is on his side.
"I need to give him the fever medicine. And he should at least try to get some food and liquids in. I don't know when the last time he ate was."
There's a moment of thoughtful silence from the other person before there's an agreeable, "Okay." Ace feels betrayed for some reason.
"C'mon Ace, time to wake up," the voice goes back to coaxing.
He murmurs a complaint because he's still tired and achy which sucks. The headache has thankfully receded, but it still hurts some, just not enough to be a bother. There's a chuckle accompanied by a soothing, "I know but if you take the meds it'll go away faster."
He moans, burying his face into the soft pillow he's lying on and pulling the sheets around him tighter as he curls up into a defensive ball. The person sighs, partially amused, partially frustrated, and then he's being bodily lifted to lean against what feels like the headboard of the bed.
"Eat some crackers. Or do you want soup?" the voice asks briskly even though Ace cracks open bleary eyes to glare at the offender. He blinks when he does.
The scene before him is confusing because the haze is lifted and he can see everything he's missed all too clearly now. He must have frozen for far too long because Sabo is peering at him, worry apparent in his tone and actions as he reaches out to touch Ace's shoulder, asking, "What's wrong?"
He draws back, unable to help the flinch and watches as Sabo falters, suddenly unsure and tentative. Sabo lets his hand drop to his side, but his eyes never leave Ace's face for even a moment.
"Ace?" he tries again, attracting the attention of a black haired boy with an all too familiar scar under his eye. Luffy gets up from the couch where he had been watching television and comes to stand beside Sabo. "What's wrong?"
He stares at them, really looks at them and sees what he's been seeing all this while but just only realized. They're both older. Luffy's hair has grown out a little, but not enough to be considered long. He's taller, much older and his gaze is no longer that of the nine year old he used to see. But it still holds the same affection and love it did when he was younger and something in Ace chokes. Sabo's hair is long and wavy, somewhat like his he realises, no longer cropped short. There's a burn scar across his left eye edging down his neck and disappearing beneath the collar of his shirt. He too is taller, older and with a gaze that Ace almost wouldn't recognize if it weren't for the same love and affection that Luffy's gaze holds. He shakes his head in disbelief and can't stop the sentence that he wants so desperately to be wrong from slipping out.
"You're not real. You can't be."
Luffy freezes as Sabo stills and they're both looking at him with a mix of emotions that Ace is too edgy to decipher.
"It's a dream, right? I'm going to wake up any moment now and it'll be just like any other day, right?"
His voice is deceptively calm for some strange reason. After all, Sabo died in a fire. He saw it on the news. He knows. He isn't sure why Luffy is here either. Luffy should be safe with his grandfather not in the small backwater town Ace ended up in.
"No, Ace," Sabo finally speaks, voice shaky but clear. "No, this isn't a dream."
"You're dead," he tells Sabo flatly. "It said so on the news. Outlook's heir killed in arson attack on their house."
He doesn't mention how he cried for days after, or the fact that he regrets ever spitting those foul poisonous words at Sabo and never saying "I'm sorry," because his brother was gone, buried six feet under and he couldn't even visit his grave.
"That was merely something the tabloids blew up, simply because it sounded juicy and sold a lot of magazines," Sabo tells him, running a hand through his blonde hair that Ace still can't believe is no longer cropped short but slightly longer, out of nervousness.
It explains the burn scar that's etched over his left eye and Ace dimly acknowledges the fact that Sabo is lucky he can even use his eye. He still can't accept the explanation though; no matter how logical it sounds. His brain has been known to come up with weirder theories.
"I've officially gone insane," he states, staring blankly at a spot past his two imagined brothers. "Because there is no way you two are real. Sabo is dead and Luffy is back at Goa with his grandfather. I've fabricated this whole thing because I'm delirious. I'm probably still lying on the floor in front of the stairs."
"You're not insane," Luffy insists, stepping forward and making Ace pull back again. He doesn't miss the frustrated look in Luffy's eyes or the way Sabo's eyes darken. "You're not, Ace," Luffy repeats, voice like steel and a lilt of a promise hidden in his tone. "I told you, we won't leave you alone again."
"Maybe you should."
It makes Luffy recoil and Sabo start but he's adamant in his words, in the truths he's always known.
"I'm not worth it. I can't be. I left you alone, Luffy! You hate being alone and I left you alone because I thought it was best for you! And Sabo wrote me letters after he went back to his parents place and I never once replied him! I could have. But I didn't."
His chest is aching, as is his head, and tears blur his vision but he can't stop the flow of words that have been bottled up for too long.
"I should never have been your brother."
Something slams into him the instant he says that and arms wrap around him as a warm voice ensures him, "Silly Ace, you've always been our brother."
A warm weight settles into his side like it's its birthright and another arm is slung across his shoulders like a heavy reassurance.
"Like I haven't forgiven you for saying I wasn't your brother," Sabo snorts. "I knew you didn't mean it. You were just mad."
"You were lonely too!" Luffy chirps as he draws his lanky limbs onto the bed to make himself more comfortable.
"You may be an idiot, dumb and suicidal but you're ours, Ace. Don't you ever dare to deny that," Sabo tells him, voice heavy with promise and seriousness. "We won't let you."
Ace doesn't reply, mainly because he can't. His throat feels constricted with the threat of tears and the fact that they're real it's amazing he's sure he's dreaming but-
"You're not," Luffy says and Ace jolts, startled. Sabo sounds confused as he leans over to look at Luffy.
"What are you talking about?" he asks, sounding fond and exasperated all at once.
"Ace," Luffy says like his explanation is good enough. Sabo raises an eyebrow and thankfully, Luffy elaborates. "He's not dreaming."
It's enough to snap Ace out of his stupor because he draws away, much as he hates it, and leaves Luffy staring at him in puzzlement and Sabo frowning with some trepidation.
"How can I be sure?" he asks hoarsely because he doesn't want to wake with crushed hopes if what he sees in front of him now isn't real. He doesn't think he'll be able to handle it. "How can I tell if I'm not dreaming?"
"Because you're not," Luffy says simply, blinking at him like he doesn't understand.
Sabo thankfully seems to understand his dilemma better because he sighs and folds his arms.
"We're older. You've never seen us before right? So your brain can't make up images of things it hasn't seen."
"It's capable," he defends, stubborn to the end. He's not risking his sanity on a 'could be' dream. "You don't really look that much different from when you guys were younger. I could have easily just stretched my imagination a little and conjured up you two."
"We're not magic tricks," Sabo mutters under his breath before he replies aloud to Ace's obstinacy. "I know it's hard to believe. And to be honest, I don't know how to convince you that all this is real. But you've got to trust us, Ace."
Mutely, Ace shakes his head, earning a sigh from Sabo and a hurt expression from Luffy.
"It's okay," Sabo says. "Give us time."
He reaches over to ruffle Luffy's hair and gets up briskly. "In the meantime," he says walking back to the kitchenette in the room. "What do you want to eat; soup or crackers?"
"Both?" Ace ventures nervously and Sabo grins.
"Good to know you still have a large appetite."
Luffy bounces on the bed, demanding for meat because soup isn't very filling and Sabo is laughing and a small part of Ace grins because… just maybe this is real. For once, he doesn't doubt that he has brothers and they haven't left him alone. For once, he relaxes because it feels like he's come home.
NOTE (IGNORE IF YOU WANT)
Okies... I'm not dead. Yet. This is supposed to be a series but well... I got sidetracked by a new fandom so... yeah, might take a while for me to continue... but this can be a oneshot so that's good, I guess...
Ah, about my other story, to the guests who left prompts, sorry I haven't been able to reply. I've been... caught up with life and literally had to ditch a lot of the things I love, including writing. And that meant losing passion. So, I'll try my best to come up with something, but I'm warning you, I'll only post it if I feel it's good enough to be posted.
Hmm... yeah. That's it. Hope you guys like the story.
Fun fact: I got this off a scene in Ratatouille. What happens when you watch it one too many times...