Oh my god. I am SO sorry for this. Please don't ask me questions on this. I honestly DO NOT effing know what I've been writing. This just literally poured out of me. Go with the flow, okay? D:
It is dark here, she thinks. Although she doesn't exactly know where "here" is…but it did not matter, did it? It didn't matter because in the darkness there was a name being called and she was compelled to follow. It was not compulsion that came from a vampire mind trick or a compulsion that was bred from guilt or sorrow. It was compulsion that came from within her. Her soul was reaching out, screaming for its twin flame. It could sense drastically that the flame was dying. Something was blowing out its light and her soul begged for it to hold on. Do not burn out. My love will keep you here.
Through the darkness, the name was called again. "Elena…" it whispered. Over and over again. She began running through nothing, eyes blinded by blackness. The name was fading. "Elena…..Elen…a…E…." Oh, no! Don't stop calling! Please, she begged!Please keep calling my name! I can't find you! It's so dark in here..
There was bright, white light. It blinded her, naturally, but she did not stop running. She ran until the light consumed her. Dark was replaced by such brightness. Closer, now…she had to be closer! "Elena…I can't see you, Elena…"
That voice echoed through her and her soul screamed in agony. Do not die on me! Do not burn out! Keep glowing! Glow, I said, glow!
It was a voice she would recognize anywhere. A voice that she would walk a thousand and one miles for. A voice that she would love until no end; or until the end came upon her where she could no longer love that voice. It was his voice.
Why couldn't she speak? Where was her voice? She tried to call out to him, to call his name and beckon him to her. She would wrap her arms around him and protect him from the darkness. The evil being that was trying to take his soul. She cried now. She could not help the tears from racing down her cheeks. They passed over her lips and so she tasted them, yet to her horror they did not taste like salt.
Blood. She was crying blood.
"Elena…." the voice cried out again. Instead now it was cut off sharply and someone screamed out loud. It took a minute to realize that it was her. Her voice had been found.
"I'm here! I'm here!" She cried out loud, repeating herself desperately. "Oh, I'm here. Please. Please find me. I can't live without you. I can't see. I can't see anything! The light…it burns. Damon, it is burning me. I'm afraid!" She shrieked out, eyes opening and closing; wanting to adjust to the brightness but not finding a possible way.
And then his voice breaks through. "Elena…follow the sound of my voice."
"I can't!" she gasped. "It's so hard to breathe…Oh, Damon, I'm afraid. I don't want to go into the darkness again."
"I'm not in the dark, Elena. Please…."
And so she followed his voice, determining the best route to him. It was also great help that her soul was reaching toward his. She could feel it shouting, crying…most of all, shattering. It was shattering because Damon was dying. She could feel it inside of her. The desire to live herself was slowly fading away as he faded. Every breath he took became quieter and quieter and so did hers. It was as if a great force was crushing them both. As if death could not take one without taking the other.
Suddenly everything became normal again. There was no bright light and there was no darkness. Now, there was simply nothing. Nothing to look at. Nothing to see. Nothing to smell, or touch, or hear…no, not hear. She could hear something now. Footsteps. Walking toward her. Her eyes, swollen with tears, made out the shape of a dark figure.
"Elena." it breathed.
And that's when he fell.
She rushed toward him now, wrapping her arms around his neck. "What's happening? Why do you…what happened?" Her fingers greedily latch onto his face. He feels wet, like he's been sweating. Maybe he has.
Or maybe he hasn't, she thinks. In a place like this surely one would not sweat? She pulls her fingers back and begins to cry, for they are covered in blood. His face is covered in blood. She pulls his body against her and begins to rock them back and forth. She is in hysterics.
"Elena…Elena…you found me," he breaths. "You found me."
"Damon..where are we? What's going on? Why are you bleeding?" she cries to him. He peeks up at her face with those gorgeous blue eyes that she has always secretly adored. The blue eyes that made the ocean look dull and the morning sky look hideous.
"I'm dying." he explains, voice no more than a whisper. She shakes her head.
"No. You're not. You can't be…why are you dying? Why are you dying, Damon!" She shouts.
"It doesn't matter. Shh, Elena.. don't cry. Don't cry over me." He begs, chest heaving. She only holds him and continues to cry, because his soul is slowly fading away in her arms. And she can do nothing to stop it.
"It matters, Damon. It matters." She insists, leaning down to touch foreheads with him.
It is quiet for a long time. She knows that any minute and he may fall limp forever. She may lost him forever. Yet she cannot find words to say, for she herself feels very light-headed. As if her head is losing blood. As if her soul is dying.
She doesn't understand how she is here. Where she is, who did this to Damon, or if this is all but a cruel dream. It feels real, and that is enough for her.
"Elena. I need you…to answer something for me," Damon asks silently.
She looks down, her protector almost sleeping in her arms. She rocks him gently.
"Was it pity or was it love? The night Klaus took Stefan. The night Katherine…brought the cure." he says somberly, lips barely moving as he spoke.
Tears fall down her face and land on his neck. "It was good-bye," she whispers at last, watching his eyes look up at her helplessly. Her helpless protector. Her helpless Damon. "It was good-bye, Damon. But I'm not ready to say good-bye. I can't say good-bye. I can't leave you, Damon. I won't leave you. I will never leave you here alone." she repeats, clutching him tighter.
He swallows heavily. "This is no cure this time."
She sobs into him heavier and whispers once more, "I will never leave you here alone."
"So it wasn't love, then?"
"No. No, it was good-bye." She opens her milky eyes to stare into his. She uses her hand to wipe away the tears on his face and to clear his eyes of the blood that oozes from somewhere beneath his scalp. "It wasn't love then, Damon. That was then. But just because it wasn't love then doesn't mean I don't love you now." She admits.
His eyes widen and he struggles to speak. "Elena..you…but Stef-"
"Shh!" she interrupts him. "It's me and you, Damon. It's only me and you here. It's just us."
He presses his cheek warmly against her hand and sighs, "It was always just us, Elena."
She feels him slipping away now. "No!" she cries as she watches his eyelids flutter and his eyes go blank. "No, Damon! No! Hold on! Please! For me….for me….please…" she sobs. "Damon, I love you. I love you. Do you hear me? I love you. I've always loved you."
And now she feels broken. Torn. She is no longer whole, yet she can do nothing but watch as Damon's flame burns out. She wants to go, too. She has to. She feels her soul breaking off into tiny pieces, crying out in lonely agony. They no longer have any reason to live, to keep together, because the other half of its flame has been blown out by the cruel breath of Death itself. She cries. "Come back." Rocking his lifeless body back and forth. Back and forth. Back and forth.
She does this until she feels her own flame burning out. She is dying, as well, and for once she welcomes it. It isn't about Stefan any more. It isn't about loving two people and making a choice. It was always Damon. It was always his soul calling to hers. Now, she could finally respond.
"I'll see you again." she whispers now, pressing her lips against his repeatedly. They do not kiss back. She runs a shaky hand through his hair and smooths it out like a young little girl and her precious doll. "Okay? Wait for me. I'll see you again."
It's coming quicker, now. she realizes. Her internal glow is fading away, dying like fire without oxygen.
This was her without Damon. It wasn't meant to be this way. They were supposed to walk the earth in unison. Not seperately. Not one in life and the other in death.
If one should go, the other must go too.
It simply was.