Title: Choice
Author: Chele
Rating: R (for sexual descriptions)
Category: Angst, Romance
Codes: A/S, Tu (little flashback scene)
Summary: The choices we make in life, greatly impact those we love.
Disclaimer: Nope, I don't own Enterprise, or Paramount. Too bad, 'cuz I do need the money.
Notes: This is a Challenge in a Can (CiaC) - baby, cold, finger - from "The Linguistics Database" (www.lingdata.net). Also, this fic is set up on flashbacks.
Acknowledgments: Thanks so much, to my betas, Taryn Eve, Erin NhaMinerva, SueC, smurf, Ozchick, stexgirl2000, and KayJay. I really appreciated all the help, suggestions, and comments.
Warning: This is a deathfic, so if you do NOT like deathfics, read at your own risk.

* * *

The bridge creaked as it swayed above the rocks; rushing water could be faintly heard down below. Lightning flashes sizzled through the blackened sky, where it had once been lush pink. Halfway across the bridge, a Suliban had a firm grip on a trembling woman. The atmosphere was very cold as the winds became more turbulent. The woman's raven hair would have been flapping across her face, were it not for the Suliban's tight hold on it. She made no movement as the alien pressed his phase pistol against her temple.

"Silik," Jonathan Archer bellowed. "Let her go!" He attempted to take a few steps forward.

"Nah ah ah," Silik warned. "Not another step, Captain, or she gets her brain fried." Silik gave Hoshi a little jostle.

This isn't suppose to happen, Jon thought. Enterprise's negotiations with the Confederacy of Feylan had been friendly...until the Suliban had crashed the meeting. Just keep your mind focused, Jon.

* * *

"Hi!" a young voice greeted.

Jon's face was buried in the palms of his hands as he sat slumped and bent over in the waiting room of the Kapiolani Medical Center.

Jon looked up to find himself staring into beautiful dark almond-shaped eyes. "What do you want?"

"I want to cheer you up!" said the young and petite Asian girl. She took a seat next to Jon, pushing aside her two braided pigtails.

Sweeping a full glance at her, he smirked. "How is a candy striper going to cheer me up?"

She immediately put a hand to her hip and replied, "I'm NOT just some candy striper." Her voice feigned anger and hurt.

Jon chuckled and said, "Well, if I'm not mistaken, candy stripers wear that type of uniform." He pointed at her red and white outfit.

The girl huffed. "I do other things too."

"Like what?"

"My mother says that I work really well with people, especially strangers. So when I see someone who looks sad, I walk up to them and cheer them up."

"Your mother, does she work here?"

"Yes. But she has me helping her while I'm off school." Her face had suddenly become sulky.

"What's the matter? Don't you like working here? You just said you work really well with strangers."

The girl sighed. "I do. It's just...I wanted to go to Vulcan during my vacation."

Jon raised an eyebrow. "Why do you want to go to Vulcan?"

"To learn the language, of course." She said that as if he had asked a very silly question.

"Do you like languages?" This girl was peaking his interest.

"Oh, yes!" Her face brightened. "I LOVE languages. I've already learned to speak 10 earth languages pretty well. Now I have a taste for alien languages, ever since I met Syar. You don't know who Syar is, but he's my Vulcan mentor. He believes that I have great potential to be a master of languages." She spoke very proudly and, once again, her demeanor changed to being sad. "But my mother thinks it's all garbage. She says, 'Just keep your mind focused here on Earth and not the galaxy. You're only 12-years-old.' Both my parents don't believe I'd make it to the stars, but I would love to be up there, learning all the languages I've yet to learn."

"You want to be a linguist?"

"Yes," the girl said quietly. Tilting her head, she asked curiously, "So, why are you here? What brings you to Hawaii?"

"What makes you think I don't already live here?" he teased.

"Because, men in Hawaii never wear suits," she answered, pointing to his suit.

He smiled. "You caught me, so I'll tell you."

"We're actually here for business. I accompanied my father to his meeting with the Vulcans, which wasn't productive. There were arguments between both sides and, in the middle of my dad's dispute, he suffered a stroke." Then he added bitterly, "Those damn Vulcans are always trying to put us down, all because they think we humans are inferior."

"You had a meeting with Vulcans?" The girl was surprised. "Wait a minute, your dad isn't Henry Archer, is he?"

"Yeah, he is."

"Oh my gosh! Then you must be Jonathan Archer!"

"Yeah." Could this girl get any louder?

"I've read so much about you and your father! And I can't believe that I'm actually talking to you." Her eyes became big in awe.

"Now that you know my name, I should get yours."

She extended her right hand. "The name's Hoshi Sato, daughter of Kenji and Yumi Sato, sister of Hirohito, Miyuki, and Takahome Sato, sister-in-law to Hidemi..."

Jon put his hand up to stop her and chuckled. "You don't have to be so formal."

"But I want to."

"Mr. Archer?" Someone had interrupted them.

"May I speak with you?"

"Yes." Turning to Hoshi, Jon said, "Excuse me, but I have to speak with him."

"Sure."

Walking a few steps away, both Jon and the doctor halted by the doorway of an empty room.

"How is my father?"

"He's doing relatively well." The doctor smiled. "You may see him now."

"That would be great."

Following the doctor, Jon suddenly heard his name being called. Turning around, he found Hoshi standing in front of him.

"Where are you going?"

"I'm just going to check up on my father."

"Okay. But, here." Hoshi handed him a tiny paper crane. "When you unfold the crane, you'll find my name, telephone number, and address." She stared up at him. "I want you to keep in touch with me. Someday, you might be Captain, and I'd like to be up there with you."

"Sure, Hoshi." He grinned at the young girl in front of him. "Just remember to keep your mind focused on those languages." He gave her a small salute and watched her retreating form. He couldn't help but think how adorable those braided pigtails looked.

* * *

Jon stopped dead in his tracks, listening to the rushing water below. "You're a sick bastard, you know that?!"

"I know." Silik smirked.

* * *

Bright lights decorated the dining hall and Jon strained his eyes not to look directly at the blinding illuminations. Scanning his surroundings, he took in the sight of the Weilanians and some of his crew dancing and laughing merrily. Enterprise's crew had been given a grand feast in their honor, and Jon stood in casual conversation with the Head Chief of Weilan.

"You've put so much effort into this feast, Krohin." Jon picked up a glass, filled with gray liquid, that the Weilanians called zogcrat, and clinked glasses with the chief.

"Thank you, Captain Archer." The Weilanian Head Chief smiled enthusiastically. "I am very pleased that you and your crew are enjoying your stay."

Taking a sip of the zogcrat, Jon almost choked, making a sputtering sound.

"Are you all right?" asked a concerned Krohin, helping Jon with his glass.

"Yes." Jon chuckled. "Your beverage has one heck of a bite."

"It is the best of our kind." Krohin said with great dignity.

"Well, I'm sure the rest of my crew seems to think so too." Jon could see his chief engineer, Commander Trip Tucker, and armory officer, Lieutenant Malcolm Reed, taking large gulps of zogcrat, as they chatted away with some females.

Hearing a familiar voice, Jon turned his attention to the source. There, in the corner of the hall, was Hoshi, talking with a Weilanian male. She must be using her wonderful linguistics skills, Jon thought, as he smiled to himself. As usual on a shore leave, Hoshi had her hair down, and it had a touch of waviness. She wore a sleeveless yellow dress, which he thought was very pretty. Its v-neck was designed with soft ruffles and it's length was about knee-high with a slight slant. Her feet wore cute sandals with four-inch heels. For some strange reason, he couldn't tear his eyes away from her. I've been doing that a lot, lately. Then he saw Hoshi turn his direction, and their eyes met. He could tell that she was excusing herself from the Weilanian, as she headed towards his direction. Along the way, she picked up a glass of zogcrat from a nearby table.

"Hi." Hoshi smiled brightly when she reached him.

"Hi, back."

"Care to join me outside?"

"Uh. I'm actually speaking with the Chief." When Jon turned to his side, he found that the chief was gone.

"What Chief?" Hoshi asked innocently. "Looks like you're all mine for the rest of the night, Captain."

"I guess so." Jon sighed.

They walked side-by-side as they exited the dining hall. Outside was quiet and dark, the only light was from the stars shining and Hoshi's bright yellow dress. It reminded Jon of the sun, Hoshi the bright illuminator. Hoshi spotted a bench and sat down, and patting the space next to her, she motioned for Jon to sit.

"I miss being able to just watch the stars from land." Jon watched Hoshi's face from the side.

"I do too, Hoshi."

"Remember when I asked you to take me to the stars when you became Captain?"

"Yes."

"I was so happy when you said you would." She smiled, looking right at him. Jon's heart almost skipped a beat.

"Did you know I had a crush on you?"

"Did you?" Jon's eyebrow shot up.

Hoshi laughed. "Jon, I swear, you spend too much time with T'Pol!"

"Hey! That was my trademark move, even before I met T'Pol."

Hoshi snorted. "Probably because you learned it from those meetings with the Vulcans, back then on Earth."

"Well, I used to think you were adorable." Jon changed the subject back.

"That's sweet. But not really romantic."

"Who's trying to be romantic?"

Hoshi, who still held her zogcrat glass, drank the entire alien alcohol in one gulp. When she was through, she let out a loud sigh.

"How do you do that?"

"What do you mean?"

"Isn't it strong for you? I only took a sip of it and I felt as if my lips were going to burn off."

Hoshi laughed. "Sake is much stronger than this. In fact, I actually like this. I think it'll be my favorite drink."

Jon felt Hoshi inch closer to him and she said, "We wouldn't want those precious lips of yours to be burned." The next thing he knew, her lips were on his. Shocked, he just let her kiss him, until she broke away.

"What was that for?"

"I wanted to do something that I've never done before."

Putting a hand to her forehead, Jon asked, "Are you ill? You must have had too many of those zogcrat."

Hoshi slapped his hand away. "Don't be silly, Jon. I wanted to see how it felt to just kiss you. Other women can, why can't I?"

"But Hoshi, I'm your..."

Hoshi cut in, putting her fingers to his mouth. "Jon, I know. Please, let me be carefree, for this one night."

In answer, he cupped Hoshi's face with his hands and kissed her with the passion he had always suppressed. Let me be carefree, too.

* * *

"Now, Archer," Silik called out to him, "I'm allowing you to make a choice." Then, with a sickening grin, he continued, "Your wife?" He gripped Hoshi's hair more forcefully and pressed the phase pistol harder against her temple, causing her to wince and let out a low groan. "Or your life - Enterprise?"

Jon watched Hoshi as she slept on her stomach, her naked back exposed as the blanket had ridden down her body. Her face was towards his and he felt at peace just observing her.

He began to lightly trace his finger up and down her back, in circular patterns. Closing his eyes, he continued to trace the patterns on her back, remembering the previous night.

It had been their first time together, physically, after a whole year of secretly dating, and it had felt so right. He remembered the way he trailed kisses along her neck and how she shivered with delight. How she had gasped when he carried her to his bed. How she had bucked underneath his body when he touched her intimately. And how she had screamed his name when he entered her, and how he cried out her name when they found their release.

They had become a whole entity as they were connected, and Jon felt disappointed that they were not connected right now.

"Morning."

Jon opened his eyes and saw Hoshi staring at him with those beautiful almond-shaped eyes.

"Morning." He smiled. "Wow. You're so beautiful."

Hoshi blushed and meekly tried to hide her face.

Jon chuckled. "You don't have to be so shy, Hoshi, especially after last night."

Hoshi blushed more.

Jon propped his head on his hand and said, "Ask me what I'm thinking."

"Okay," Hoshi said, a little bewildered. "What are you thinking, Jon?"

"I was thinking how wonderful it would be to be able to see your beautiful face every morning."

"Are you asking me to move into your quarters?" asked Hoshi, shocked. "You know that people are going to talk. Me, Hoshi Sato, a subordinate, sleeping in the quarters of you, Captain Archer, my superior officer."

Bringing his left forefinger to her bottom lip, Jon said, "No, Hoshi. I'm asking you to be my wife."

"Oh." Realization hit Hoshi.

"So...will you, Hoshi Sato, be my wife?"

Hoshi answered by kissing Jon's finger. Moving closer, she kissed his lips. "Yes, Jon. I'll be your wife, the one you love and cherish for all the days of your life, as I will you."

* * *

"You can't ask me to choose, Silik," answered Jon, "because I choose both."

"But you have to," hissed Silik. "I've already told you the coordinates of every bomb that was planted on Enteprise, and without your communicator, you'd have to rush back to let your crew know."

"Jon, please," Hoshi pleaded. "Just go!"

"Shut up!" Silik screeched in her ear, pulling her hair more, causing her to scream this time. "No one told you to speak!"

"Damn you!" Jon hollered.

Silik laughed, maniacally. "Oh, to have the great Captain Archer grovel before ME!"

"Please," Jon begged. "Don't hurt her, or our child."

* * *

Jon stirred from his sleep, hearing giggles as he mindlessly twitched his nose at something irritating it.

"Wakey, wakey, dear Johnny." Hoshi kept tracing Jon's nose lightly with a feather that she had found on their shore leave date on the planet of P'yush.

"Hoshi," Jon groaned. "It's still time for sleep." He pulled the pillow over his head, blocking any entrance from Hoshi's feather.

"But I have to tell you a little secret." Jon could hear the little pout in her voice.

"All right, all right." He surrendered and shifted the pillow so his head was lying on it. Looking at her, he sighed. "What's the secret?"

"You're going to have a new title to add to captain and husband." Then, guiding his hand to her belly, she smiled brightly. "You're going to be a daddy."

His mouth stood agape. "We're going to have a baby?!"

"Yes, Jon," Hoshi said calmly. "We're going to have a baby."

Then, lunging for Hoshi, he said, "This calls for a celebration."

He pushed Hoshi gently against the bed and suckled the nape of her neck. She let out low groans of pleasure as he slowly pulled her blanket down and made heart-shaped kisses around her breasts and led a path down to her stomach.

"Jon. I love you so much."

"I love you, too, Hoshi."

* * *

Silik's face turned from astonished to an amused glee. "So, Archer's going to be a father. That means, I not only have your wife, but I also have your spawn!"

Before Jon could respond, he saw Hoshi fight off Silik.

Hoshi rammed her boot heel into Silik's shin, making him howl in agony and loosen his grip on her. Taking the opportunity, she wrestled the phase pistol from his hand, thrusting it off the bridge, and elbowed him in the face. Doubling over with pain, Silik stumbled back. This time, Hoshi went for the kill and pushed him hard, in an attempt to knock him off the bridge. As Silik was pushed, he instantly reached for her.

Seeing his wife slip off the bridge with Silik, Jon dashed across. "Jon!" he heard her scream.

Lightening flickered, illuminating the scene.

When he arrived at the spot, he looked down and saw Hoshi gripping onto the edge of the bridge with all her might. Silik dangled below her, holding onto her ankle. His weight was beginning to take a toll on her.

Jon made the move to grab her hand and heard Silik. "Tick tock. Tick tock."

"Jon!" Hoshi was panicking. "Go save Enterprise!"

"Not without you!" He reached for her hand, but a strong gust of wind blew him off balance, and he had to hold onto the bridge rope railings for support.

"Tick tock. Tick tock." Silik laughed loudly, as blood seeped out of his mouth. "You don't have much time Archer! It's your wife, or your life."

Jon was frantic. He looked at Hoshi and stretched his arm.

"No," Hoshi said. Looking up at her husband, she said with her last breath, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." She released her hand and she and Silik fell.

Jon paled. The only sound he heard was Silik's cry, and it made him sick to his stomach.

"Hoshi!" he screamed.

He shook the bridge in despair and agony, and heard a clattering sound. Looking down to the bridge, he saw a little glimmer - Hoshi's wedding ring.

* * *

Twenty years later...

He was still alone. As he sat in his office, tears streamed down his face.

Aligned in a row on his desk were mementos of her: a perfume bottle, hair clips, wedding ring, and...a picture.

"Hoshi," he whispered, gently running his right forefinger down the edge of the photo. She was in her wedding gown, a white kimono with imprinted roses, specially designed by her mother. Instead of her hair being whisked up in a bun, like traditional Japanese hairstyle, she had opted to let it down, knowing he liked it that way. Her smile in the photo expressed so much love that he yearned to be able to imprint that smile on the palm of his hand, so he could take it with him, wherever he went. And her eyes, the very first impression he had of her, glowed like rays from the sun. It was the same ray of light he had seen right before she let go.

"You have to get past this, Jon!" Trip had caught him drowning in his sorrows one day, Hoshi's belongings strewn about on his desk.

He stared up at Trip incredulously. "Never!"

"Jon." Trip sighed. "Hoshi wouldn't want you to be like this." A small silence drifted between them. "It's been 14 years. Jus' let her be, Jon, let her be."

"I will NOT let her memory go until I find out why she made that choice...to die, along with our child, so I could be alone for the rest of my life." Jon's voice rose with every word and each was tinged with bitterness and sorrow.

Wiping his face with his hands, he stood up from his chair and checked the time - 1730. Still time to get ready.

Placing each of Hoshi's belongings back into a small metal box, he slowly shut it and hid the box back in the secret compartment under his desk.

Activating the comm link, he said, "Tom, I'm heading off to meet with the Vulcan High Command...While I'm gone, I'd like you to order me another case of zogcrat from Weilan."

"Of course, Admiral," the young masculine voice answered quietly.

Walking towards his armoire, he took out a shot glass and a bottle containing a couple inches of gray liquid. He poured the alien beverage into his glass and drank. At first, it hadn't been his cup of tea, but over time, he got use to it. Zogcrat was Hoshi's favorite drink and he wasn't going to let that go. After the drink had worked its way into his system, he placed the glass and bottle back into the armoire.

Just before exiting his office, he whispered, "Until tomorrow, Hoshi."

* * *

The End