Disclaimer: You want to know the real reason? You're not really classified for that info.

Welcome to the wounderful word of me getting bitten in the ass (again) by the plot bunny at about 1:30 in the morning. This one took a little more editing then the last oneshot I wrote, because I was half asleep by the time I got around to writting the ending, so it need to be re-written several times. I hope it turned out well. :Unsure:

Roy Mustang was a one-pant leg up at a time kinda guy. Well unless he's caught changing in the men's change room after having a shower. He had caught site of a blonde head bobbing up and down behind the change boards.

"Havoc!" He yelled hopping that it was his blonde, chimney smoking, Second Lieutenant. The blonde head stopped immediately, "Havoc, you numbskull, what the fuck are you doing?" It was unnerving seeing that piece of hair sitting there. The blonde just merely shook its head no; refusing to show it's self.

So Roy decided that it had to be Fullmetal trying to get him disturb him while he's changing. Roy decided to ignore the detail that the head had hair standing up, were as Fullmetal had his in a braid. He tired many short jokes hoping that Fullmetal would show himself in rage, but none of them seemed to work. It merely shrugged. So Roy Mustang racked his brain trying to think who was blonde and had standing up hair. Then it hit him like a tone of bricks.

"HAWKEYE!" He yelled as his voice echoed on the glossy walls. He walked towards it with much determination, to see what it was, hoping he was right this time. The figure went ridged and when he finally got a look at it, he found a very embarrassed, Riza Hawkeye.

"Taisa!" she said her face a deep red, "I can explain!" Her face reached a deeper red than before when she caught a full glance of what he was wearing, well what he wasn't wearing. His pants hanging lower on his hips than normal because they were not button up properly and he wasn't wearing a shirt.

Roy, being as slow as he is, finally realized what she was staring at. Though he didn't mind it, it kinda entertained him in a way. He turned his heel back to the locker that kept the rest of his clothes. "Sit on the bench Chuui" she took a seat like he said being the good solider that she is, as he began placing his pants on properly, "Now kindly explain to me why you are here."

"I was searching for something." She said as she began to memorize the creases in the floor.

"And what might that be?" he turned to her, fully dressed, fixing the pieces of hair that were being rebellious and flopping in front of his face.

She stared, and then gasped at the thing between his legs. "Black Hayate! So this where you've been," she dove for the dog picking it up in her arms and began showering it with affection "hiding in the men's change room. Silly dog."

Roy sighed, so it was the dog she was after. I guess it was better than her becoming a peeping tom, though that would be kinda kinky. Roy shook his head, "Well Chuui, since were both done here why don't we leave?" he gestured to the door, "I'll show you out."

They began to make the short trek to the door and he had held it open for her, and then she spoke up. "But sir what if someone sees us coming out of the bathroom together?"

"Let them believe what they want." he said simply.

I know Riza is a bit out of character but the idea of the story entertained me so much that I had to write it. I hoped you enjoyed it cause I know I did! I plan to write some more silly Royai oneshots, becasue all you find is angst and sometimes people need to laugh!

Chuui - First Lieutenant
Taisa - Colonel

Oh! Lastly for those that read Fullmetal Highschool I'm going to the cabin this week, so if I'm lucky I'll be able to get some chapters done. But I'm really aiming for Ch.4 and a long but silly Royai oneshot.