All Forgiven
"I dunno, Lana," Laxus sighed as he stared up at the ceiling, hands folded over his chest while he rested on the floor. "I mean, I'm a pretty good guy, don't you think? Mira's lucky to have me when you really think about it. Right?"
Lana, being only two years old, had only a few responses to things and, at the moment, she didn't feel like saying yes or no. Instead, she just sat there on the ground, above Laxus' head, leaning over to pat on his forehead when she saw fit. Which she did. Frequently.
"She just…expects too much of me," Laxus said with a huff. "It's not fair, Lana. I know that you don't get it. How could you? I mean, you're just a cute, fun loving, innocent little baby. Mirajane never snaps at you. She never yells at you. And she shouldn't. You don't know right from wrong. You just know that I'm your favorite person in the whole world and that you really love apples.
She did. And he was.
"But me, yes, I will admit," the man went on, "am flawed. Horribly flawed. In many ways. I forget to take the trash out, sometimes I drink too much, I suffer from an over inflated sense of self-"
All very, very true.
"-but," he finished, "I am also self aware. And I recognize those, and other things, as problems. Sure, on the outside, I show the world that I'm perfection metabolized into a human body, but I don't actually think of myself as that. No way! It's just my cold, heartless demeanor that I try to pass off to others because I'm actually very insecure and just a tad bit vain."
Hmmm. Apples sounded nice. Lana was trying to figure out how to say apples (sometimes she forgot words, sue her) as he only kept his tirade up.
"There are people that I'm real with though," he told her. "Like the demon. I let her in. You know how rare that is, hatchling? Huh? No. You don't. Because I've always let you in. From the very beginning. But the demon? She had to work for it. She wanted to work for it. Now that she has worked for it though, she's decided that she really doesn't want it. How crazy is that?"
"Appa." There. Lana knew she could get the word eventually, if she just thought on it a little. "Appa."
Laxus, however, was lost in his own world then.
"I," he said, "am not perfect. Not at all. But do I hit her? No! Do I sleep around on her? Of course not! And I don't even insult her intelligence, which, at times, would be very easy. Why? Because I love my demon. I love the life I've forged with my demon. And I love that I got to have you, Lana."
"Appa."
"I just don't love it when she yells at me. That's all."
"Daddy?"
"I mean, sure, I screw up. But I am a human being, Lana. A human being! And an awesome one at that. I deserve respect. Respect."
"Appa!"
"In a minute, Lana," he complained as she continued to pat on his head. "I'm in the middle of something right now, in case you haven't noticed."
"Appa."
"Now," the slayer began once more. "What is a dragon supposed to do, hatchling? I mean, sure, I could just apologize, but I do it all the time. And it's not fair! I'm getting tired of always having to be the one to make up. Even when the demon's wrong, she never admits it. Doesn't come to me and say that she's sorry. Just blames me for hurting her feelings. What about my feelings? Just because I'm hard on the outside doesn't mean that I'm not soft on the inside. This cold exterior is hiding a deeper dragon here, Lana. She just doesn't-"
"Appa!"
"Alright, alright." He pushed up then before leaning over to grab her. "Come on then. Let's go eat an apple or something. Huh?"
Lana just wrapped her arms around his neck as he carried her out of the living room and into the kitchen. Snack time. Perfect.
"Here you go." Laxus shifted her to his shoulders then, so that he could go around the room and get their snack ready. First, he'd need to chop up a few apples, slather them with some peanut butter, and then get the tea (juice) ready.
You know, for their tea party.
"Here's the tea pot," Laxus grumbled as he found it in the sink. "The demon didn't wash it. I bet she did this on purpose. She knows that today's Thursday. That's our tea party day!"
Lana only patted at his head, making noises softly as she waited. He was right. It was tea (juice) day. That made snack time even better.
"I just don't get her," Laxus continued to grumble as he washed the tea pot and the cups that were in the sink. "We used to get along so well. We'd never fight. Ever. And the few times we did, it'd be over in an hour. Now we're always yelling or she's mad at me or saying that I'm being mean to her. What happened?"
It took him a few minutes to get everything ready for the tea party and, once it was, they headed upstairs to have it with her dolls. At the tiny table in the corner of her room, there was a chair, of course, for her and one for her daddy, as well as another that housed her big stuffed dragon, Flash, and one for whatever other stuffed toy she felt like setting in it. That day it was one of her favorite dolls, with dark hair and big brown eyes. Honestly, the thing creeped Laxus the heck out, but he wouldn't complain.
"Tea," Lana sang as she rushed over to her toy box the second they were in the room. They needed their gloves and hats for it. Tea was for fancy people, after all. And after Laxus got his hat and way bigger gloves on, he went to take his place at the table. As always, he had to push the too tiny chair aside and just sit on the floor, but it was fine.
"Here you go," Laxus said as he went around the table, pouring some tea (juice) into all of their cups (or at least pretending with the two dolls, no need to waste good juice). "Good?"
She nodded, coming to take her own chair. Good.
"Not to beat a dead horse," Laxus began as Lana took to just munching on her apples, "but about the demon and this fight. I just can't get it out of my head. She's so uppity these days. Like she's always right and I'm always wrong. I'm not. And I'm tired of pretending like I am. What do I look like? A chump? I mean-"
"Tea, Daddy."
"I'm drinkin' it, I'm drinkin' it," he grumbled with a frown as he lifted the miniature tea cup to his mouth. "Don't you rush my tea time. You can look like Mirajane all you want, but dang it, Lana, you're not gonna boss me around too."
Maybe. Or at least not about things like tea (juice).
The little girl only took to humming as he went back to complaining. There were days that her father could talk and talk and talk. Usually she just let him. His voice was very soothing. Her mommy always said that he was the strong silent type, but Lana just didn't see it.
Mainly because he wasn't. Around her. He could talk to her. She understood him. Took him seriously. Didn't pick apart his faults until there was nothing left. Lana was his little good girl.
After a tedious tea party where Lana insisted multiple times that the dolls wanted more and more refills (never rightly grasping that Laxus was never pouring anything into the cups to begin with), it was finally nap time. And, after cleaning up a bit, they headed off to his and Mirajane's bedroom to start on that.
Only, for some reason, Laxus just couldn't shut up.
"What am I supposed to do?" he was still complaining. "Huh, Lana? I mean, what? I can't just say sorry. Not when I don't think I'm wrong. Because I'm not wrong. And I'm through acting like I am. The demon can just grow up. That-"
"S'ory."
"What's that, hatchling?"
He was laid out on his back, in the middle of the bed, the toddler resting against one of his sides.
"S'ory."
"You think that I should just say sorry? And admit that I was wrong? Even when I wasn't? Because that's what I have to do, if I wanna make up with the demon? And that I should just accept that sometimes, to be in a relationship, you have to take the high road, even when the other person doesn't want to?"
Not at all. If Laxus was actually paying attention to her and not preoccupied with his own problems, he would have remembered that Lana said sorry as serry. And s'ory, actually just meant story.
Which she wanted. Badly. Because it was naptime. And he gave the best stories.
Still though, it was a question and she just gave one of her standard answers.
"Yes."
"Hmmm." Laxus blinked. Then he rolled onto his side to snuggle the baby, eliciting giggles and wiggles from her. "I guess you're right, hatchling," he whispered though, if he was being honest with himself, he would have admitted that that was exactly what he was going to do regardless. "I love you."
"Love you." Lana had that one down pat and even gave him kisses. "Love you."
It didn't take long for the two of them to drift off then and, honestly, Laxus was glad for it. He and the demon had fought all night the day before and that never lead to a good night's sleep. No, he was having to make up for it then and that was fine. In fact, it was a few hours before he woke up again.
Lana was still there, in the bed with him, snoozing, but that wasn't what caught his attention. He could hear Mirajane, in the shower in the adjoining bathroom, and only laid there for a few minutes, still a little drowsy as he awoke.
The shower was just turning off when he pushed out off bed and figured he'd better head in there.
"I'm in here," Mira called out simply as he found her toweling off. Not that he cared. He only went to go help her. The demon didn't like that. "No, Laxus, I-"
"I'm sorry." He still took the towel from her before moving to help her dry off. "Mira. I shouldn't have yelled at you. It was so stupid too. I…I messed up. Sorry."
For a moment, he thought that she would shove him off. Instead, she only giggled.
"Awe."
Nodding, he moved to kiss her head. "I get real self-righteous sometimes."
"Sometimes."
"You forgive me?"
It was Mira's turn to kiss him. "Always."