A/N: My fan fiction will be based off my favorite characters and the dragon age franchise. *I DO NOT OWN ANY RIGHTS TO THE DRAGON AGE FRANCHISE, Bioware, EA GAMES! I ONLY OWN MY STORIES AND MY PROTAGONISTS.*

"No, Shit!" I exclaimed as Cassandra walked forward with the prisoner. I knew she was a dwarf but I couldn't get a good look at her till now. Olivia Cadash. "Livi? You're the prisoner!?"

The Seekers eyes dodged between Olivia's and my own, "You two know each other?" The hint of minor disgust in her voice was all but hidden.

"We grew up together. That's all." Olivia looked away from me to Chuckles.

"I am Solas if there are to be introductions. I am pleased to see you still live."

"He means I kept that mark from killing you while you slept." I took a step towards her as she eyeballed me. Daggers still in hand. Flipping them around her wrists, she placed them in their holsters on her back. "Thank you Solas."

Cassandra and Solas walked ahead as Olivia turned to me, "I see you still have Bianca."

I was smirking at the slight hint of jealousy, "Ah! You know I couldn't part with her if I tried." She responded with an eye roll, " Seems nothing ever changes." Her hand gestured to Chuckles but her eyes remained on me, "At least someone is happy to see I'm still alive."

Reaching up, I grasped her shoulder and turned her to face me. My eyes reflected the seriousness in her own. I waited until the Seeker was out of earshot before continuing, "What is that supposed to mean, Livi?"

Aggressively so, she shrugged my hand away, "You know EXACTLY what it means Varric." With that, she stalked off. Leaving me here to ponder my past and my regrets.

Shortly after closing the rift and back at Haven, I laid Bianca down in my tent, cleaned the blood off of her and headed out to the fire. Rubbing my hands together in a slighted attempt to warm them. Looking up to the sky, still tainted with green; it was erie.

For a moment I allowed myself to drift. Perfect green emeralds. Olivia laid on the grass of the knoll outside of Kirkwall. Her red hair blew like fire in the wind. Black trousers with a white undershirt. It was loose, made of soft material. The breeze was just chilly enough to make her nipples slightly visible underneath. The leather bracelet I had made for her when we were young still hanging from her wrist. The smell of salt water clung to the air. Clinging like the last thread of hope. Small kissable lips, voice of an angel. Pulling at my heart strings. Tears in her eyes, as she laid there. Blood seeping from her side. A silent betrayal...

"You're still here?" opening my eyes I looked over my left shoulder to Olivia. She looked beautiful in her hunter green leather armor. I chuckled at her sarcastic curiosity.

"Surprise! I figured I'd stick around for awhile." I smiled at her and received a smile in return. The slightest hint of pink on her cheeks. "Since you're out of the Seeker's grasp, how are you holding up?"

"I've been in worse shit." She stared out to the sky before turning back to me, "There was red lyrium at the conclave..." Her eyes drifted to the ground then turned to me, "All those people died, Varric."

Burdensome tears formed at the edges of her eyes. Instinct for her, a wound that never healed, a fire that never died; I reached out to her and hugged her. "Don't blame yourself, Livi." I whispered in her ear as I stroked her red hair. Pulling her away, I wiped the tears from her face and kissed her forehead, "More people are going to die if we don't stop this."

She nodded her head acknowledging that I still cared before straightening herself back up. "What do you know about red lyrium?" She asked.

"The shit infected most of Kirkwall during Meredith's rule. It's powerful and evil. Needless to say will fuck with your head." I knew my eyes showed more concern than I intended.

Olivia reached out and touched my shoulder, "You always hated my family's line of work."

I knew exactly what she was referring to. The Cadash family was notorious for smuggling lyrium. When she was a part of Orzammars' trade, they were part of the Casteless. Olivia was smart, she made a lyrium run that the surfacers couldn't refuse. That's how I found her again, in Kirkwall. "I hate that you live a risky life."

"It's a little late for sentimental's don't you think?" One that note, she turned on her heels and walked back towards the Chantry. And there I was, foot in mouth again.

Shit, my feet were sore from this week. We had gone to the Hinterlands twice! Notorious for hills. Hills and dwarves don't mix! And twice to Orlais. Olivia was a people person. Much better with her connections than she used to be. Within this past week, she recruited four new members to the Inquisition. A rogue Archer elf named Sera; she was quick witted as she was sharp. A qunari named Iron Bull; after the events at Kirkwall I tended to not undermined what the qunari we're capable of. A grey warden named Blackwall; who was certainly hiding some demons of his own. And a sassy mage known as Dorian. I called him Sparkles. For various reasons.

Yet here I was walking to her hut despite my feet aching. Only knocking twice, she immediately answered the door, "Cassandra. I said I'd be right...Oh! Varric."

"Sorry to disappoint you. I came by to see how you're holding up." I snaked in the room as she closed the door behind me. I was curious as to why she took me on every trip. Regardless of the fact that I hadn't seen her in years.

"It's been hectic, to say the least." She crossed her arms, leaning against the door frame. "Definitely crazier than the lyrium trade but I'd say the same amount of betrayal." Looking at her, our eyes met. I could tell in her eyes she meant me.

"Livi, I thought you didn't have feelings for me." Immediately, her arms uncrossed. Her face flushed and she turned away from me. "I don't have feelings for you. Never have. Never will."

I walked over to her, placing my right hand on her shoulder and turned her to face me. She leaned back against the door frame as I leaned my arm above her head, my breath at her neck, "Never, eh?" My left fingertips brushed her cheek. She was breath taking. The life in her eyes forever enlightened the depths of my soul. Green eyes looked up at me, lips inches apart. Close the gap! My thoughts screamed. The scent of her wrapped around my heart like a silk scarf of lavender and wood fire. Squeezing my heart till I bleed on both of us. I'd wash her clean in Andrastes holiest waters.

Her eyes darted to the window of the setting sun, "Nope, never." Wiggling herself from beneath my arm and headed for the door, "I'm needed in the war room."

Once again, she was gone. I leaned my head against the wall. "Come on, Varric. Get your shit together." Leaving the sunlight shined brightly on a piece of tanned leather. I walked over to the desk and touched it. The hand woven leather band, the dwarven symbol of compassion etched into it. I had worked for weeks on it. My father had frequented Orzammar for trade. She was a year or two younger than I. I cared deeply for Livi for years. A casteless dwarf tried to mug me once. He would have left me for dead if it wasn't for fifteen year old Livi deeply settling her blade in his spine. She was my first kiss. My first love. Until Bianca.

"Never say never," I shook my head from the memory, placing the band back in the desk and walked out to the setting sun. I needed to write. I needed to be lost in something other than my past. Something other than her.