Roxas wraps masking tape around the journal with shaking hands, his long frail fingers tripping over themselves. He places it in the box under the bed, his ribs digging into the white railing, no doubt turning his skin into a thick bruise. It seems all he is made of now is paper skin and rod bones, his organs dry and painful, fish out of water.
The clock is just ticking to five fourty two when he shuffles completly back into a comfortable stop, just when the door swings open and a friendly nurse walks in, giving stern orders to someone. Roxas can see the blur of red hair as the other boy bounces on his heels. Roxas pastes his eyes to the children's show on the small TV, although the quiet innuendo and shoddy refrences paired with strange drug-like animation make him feel sympathy for those who have to raise kids in this desensitized world. Even more so for those, like his mother, who have to lose them.
Roxas knows he will die, and though it sounds awful, he is ready and waiting to go. His life now is so painful, the days brightened by the shining personality trying to inch his way into room, even though the nurse clearly told him to stay out. She makes a bit of a choking noise, as quietly as possible, then tries not to look worried as she smiles at Roxas. The redhead jumps back before the nurse turns all the way around, smiling sweetly at her. She pats Axel on the shoulder as she walks out, smiling back, but Roxas can hear her muffled, dry sobs from his bed. He walks in the room quietly, shuffling the boquet of flowers in his hand.
Roxas can tell Axel thinks he isn't looking, and has to fight back a weak blush as handsome green eyes scrape over his delapadating form. He feels his stomach leap, all air in his lungs gone, and his throat contracting and tightening. It is the same sensation you get when driving over a small hill to fast. Only Axel could make the weeks before the end pleasant. Roxas feels guilty and sad for many reasons, about his dying. One, he is leaving Axel; two, Axel, and others, will miss him; three, he knows Axel loves him and will have a hard time moving on to someone else. And, he smiles as Axel dump half-wilted Irises into the garbage putting fresh magnolias into the vase, the teen must be spending a load on flowers.
Axel sits in the chair beside the bed, trying to look grim through his faint smile. It's so very hard not to feel that warmth when Roxas is around, despite how ill the other is. He pretends to think Roxas will be fine, tries to convince himself that he will be. But he can see the heart-rate monitor, hear the change in Roxas' breahting, and see the pain in his eyes. Yet, he will continue to smile at the boy laying by him, trick him into thinking Axel is still perfectly ignorant. There is no point in coming just to feel your throat contract, just to see the almost mummified boy on the bed, coming just to see death, sickness, and cry your eyes out like Xion or Olette or Hayner or Pence. They try to visit their friend, but can't see what is really happening, how things truly are like Axel can. They see him dying, Axel sees him being reborn.
Roxas sees the anger set slowly into Axel's jaw, knows he is Axel is thinking of all thier other friends. He raises a hand out toward Axel, and immediatly the boy yanks his chair forward, his body jerking into motion at uneven times. Axel is careful to wrap his fingers around the bruises from the IV, rubbing the pads of his fingers on Roxas' thin palm. Axel moves his leg and feels the box of journals under the bed, looking up to smile at the blonde. Roxas grins back, and then starts coughing violently. Axel reaches over and presses the button for the nurse, the climbs into the bed with Roxas before she can get in the room. A soft touch runs through his hair, and he breathes in the sterile scent of Roxas skin, mixed with a familiar twinge of sweat and sea-salt. He still smells almost the same.
A few nurses bustle in the room, Roxas parents in tow, and Axel presses a kiss to his temple. He discreatly drags the box out from under the bed, kicking away toward one wall of the room, then moves to stand in the corner by it. Roxas greets his family weakly, trying and failing to lift his hands to wave at them. Axel bends over and picks up the boxes, smiling at Roxas as he leaves. They keep as much eye contact as they can, wide smiles and wet eyes, then both are gone.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Some things never change, Eleaus thinks, staring at the sight before him. Ienzo sits on a blue swing, the rubbery plastic melding around his bottom. His legs pump ever-so-slightly as he rocks back and forth, light raindrops dusting his hair and making the tips of his bangs curl. They may be in college, but Ienzo has never been one to skip out on tradition.
Eleaus is supposed to be in a med class, and had skipped out on it simply from a whim. He watches Ienzo look around, then pump his legs with a bit more vigour, before deciding to walk over. He silently stands behind Ienzo, then places his hands firmly on the petite boys back, pushing him forward. Ienzo's fingers tighten on the chains of the swing, then relax almostb completely. Eleaus knows the boy was worried he wouldn't show, not because he has little faith in Eleaus, but because the Ienzo always worries. He is worried about school, about he will do after school, he is worried is too childish, and is at the same time worried he is too boring and grown up. And though it is never expressed, never talked about, he is worried of growing apart from Eleaus.
But, like he did as a child, Ienzo could always swing away his troubles. It became a past-time for him, finding a swing set and settling down on it. The first time he had met Eleaus he was on a swingset. The tall boy had sat himself on the grass a few feet away, agaisnt a tree, and opened up a notebook. Nearly an hour later they finally spoke to each other, and had been best friends ever since. Ienzo found his that his cleansing-of-the-soul tradition was magnified by the soothing presence of the brunette, and as they grew closer, the large, warm hands on his back. It was like Eleaus could take hold of him and push him farther away from his troubles then Ienzo could ever have imagined.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Roxas was not a whore. A bit slutty, maybe, but it's not like he could feel anything. That was the problem, he was emotionally completely drained, and physically he was lacking.
The dear, dear Superior, before things went totally downhill with them, that is, gave Roxas a word of advice. He pulled Roxas aside, and talked to him about the lack of the heart they all had. Xemnas explained that he knew he was devoted to Kingdom Hearts, and he knew he loved Saix. He rambled about Kingdom Hearts, but Roxas ignored that. One thing he said though caught the blonde's attention. He said that although they had no hearts, no emotions, thier bodies... almost, didn't understand that. So, when looking for a steady relationship, like the one he had with Saix, the way to know it was real as to use your body to decide. He said that the physical level of pleasure changes depending on the situation. When you have an orgasm, amazing like no other, that is when you know that if you could feel, you would.
So, Roxas went on a mighty, epic journey to find that soul-shattering orgasm. He started in the shower, with his hand. The basis for all good relationships was utter perfection, he figured, and no one knew him better then himself. The only problem was, he felt like a douche for jacking off with no reason, other than to jack off. It worked, of course, but Roxas couldn't help but feel, well, bored during and after. Nothing is worse than a boring orgasm. He had a basis, time to move on to everyone else.
In a quick summary, Vexen was freezing, Demyx was slobbery, Roxas craved a lint roller after Xaldin, he could barely keep it up with Larxene, Marluxia made him sneeze, Lexaeus was scary, Xigbar was fucking upside-down, pun intended, Zexion just wasn't right, Luxord had cards in his bed (Roxas had burning, painful papercuts in places he didn't want to admit) and Xion was more clueless then he was. Axel was good, but only in the same way his hand was. So that idea was out.
Then, Kairi. Roxas didn't feel bad for talking advantage of her, just like he wasn't digusted by himself being so open-legged, but that was almost as bad as Namine (who he went soft on, no embarrasement, and the other blonde picked up his softened penis and FLOPPED it back agaisnt him, giggling. Like a cat with a string.) Riku, well, he was attractive, and didn't object. But, dammnit, the boy fumbled like nothing Roxas could ever imagine. He just poked, prodded, and stroked until he figured it out. Of course, the blindfold probably didn't help much.
So, Roxas left. The only thing his conversation with Axel conviced him of was this; Axel may not have been mind-blowing for Roxas, but Roxas was mind-blowing for Axel. He did discover something interesting though, the one boy who did it for him. Roxas didn't even feel happy.
Imagine the irony that took place when Axel faded away beside the one person who made Roxas jizz his pants.
____________________________________
The first thing he noticed was the lava lamp on the corner desk. The second was the body pillow as big as he was. The last was mangled peice of surfboard over the bed, which had silken sheets. He placed his duffle bag on his bed, and jumped as the door opened. He quickly set his case down and turned to his roommate. He examined the other male quickly and guessed he was a junior or senior, and was very attractive. But, unfortunatly for Demyx, he probably wouldn't want his freshmen roommate hanging all over him. He was wrong, though, and Xigbar was really nice to him. He even helped Demyx set up a solid study sechdule.
They became close friends, and one night Xigbar sat with Demyx and told him how he crashed into a coral reef where the ocean was shallow. He had been surfing and caught the fin of the board in them as he came off a wave. He tumbled into the rocky shores of the beach, and it had taken half an hour before his friends had managed to find him. Xigbar pulled off his shirt, and Demyx had gaped at the jagged scars covering his chest, hips, and back, all matching the one on his face. After that, something akin to hero-worship played out, and Demyx would admire the other man from afar. He would lay awake until obscene hours of the morning listening for a hitch in the other man's breathe, praying to stay awake until Xigbar woke up, just to see if he could catch a glimpse of morning wood.
Then he got caught. Xigbar caught him staring, texting under the table about his troubles, staying awake at night and listening, he caught everything. And Demyx was afraid, but unashamed. He wasn't sure what would happen. He tried not to cry during the week of silence when the other was mainly gone. Then, tried not to cry when he came back again, explaining he felt the same way, and the absence was a test.
Some of the last things he noticed was the glow of the lava lamp, the fact the body pillow was in his own bed, where he usually slept, and the way Xigbar's sheets felt like being underwater in the way they caressed his leg. The surf board reflected thier image with help of the moonlight, and Demyx didn't realise he had been smiling.
__________________________________________________
"You know what, fuck you Sora! Maybe I am just like my father; too bold. Maybe your just like my mother! She's inever/i satisfied! That's why she left him in the first place! You can't leave me if I leave first!" With that, Axel slammed the door behind him, leaving the brunette with tears in his eyes.
"How can you leave me just standing here!" Sora screamed at the door, but the car started up none-the-less.
Sora stormed to the kitchen and grabbed a glass of wine from the table. He trudged back to the living room and sank on the leather couch, turning on the television. By the time his glass was empty, bottle next to him, and the show was rolling it's credits, the door opened again.
Sora raised tired blue eyes to meet the hunched redhead's form in the hallway. Axel sighed, walking slowly over to his lover. He bit his lip as he stared at him, then looked away as his eyes began to sting.
"Why do we scream at each other?" Sora asked quietly, throat raw.
"....Maybe I'm just too demanding... I'm sorry, Sora, I always expect so much, but then I never follow through for you-" Axel choked on his words, shaking his head.
"It's okay Axel, come here." The redhead sat on the couch, and Sora raised his hand to feel his heart- beating rapidly in his chest, then Sora's stomach, churning and frothing with anxiety.
"Don't make me chase you when you want to be here, Axel." Sora rubbed his thumb over Axel's hand and smiled.
"I always turn the car around." Axel replied, bringing their lips together.
_________________________________________
///eeyore and the blustery day///
"Good morning." Zexion glanced over his shoulder from watching the coffee drip, to see Xaldin standing there. The taller man, not that it was much of a feat when comparing to Zexion, was wearing naught but his pajama trousers, and -hmm, they appeared to be traditonal white- briefs. Or maybe boxer briefs.
Zexion sniffed as he realized he probably would find out soon enough. -ooh, he does smell lovely. Irish Spring soap, the kind that leaves your skin feeling odd.- Xaldin laid his hand on Zexion's shoulder and glanced at the coffee pot.
"Morning." He nodded back, reaching above Zexion to grab two mugs from the cabnit. His chest rubbed agaisnt Zexion's shoulders, and the shorter man smirked. He yawned and pushed back agiasnt his partner, wiggling his behind. Xaldin shifted to the side, so Zexion gave one final, rough and lingering as it were, stretch. The coffee maker beeped and he lifted the pot from the machine. Boxer briefs, he decided, just as Xaldin pulled him away from pouring the coffee.
_________________________
Somewhere in the dark corner's of Reno's mind.....
Well, good morning and hello to all you listeners. It's a nice and sunny day today in Renopolis, and it's now 5 after the hour of 11 PM in the big, booming city! Temperature's a bombing 65 degrees, which is good news for you guys, since Tseng is blowing out hot air, and in order for it go in the left ear, and out the right, it's gotta blow over us!
Pale, pretty and pissy is, well, pissy, and apparently it's our fault, so look out for major black-outs on your city block, as this is gonna go on for a while! In other news, Elena's tits are inflating at a slow and steady rate, seeing as she bought that bra with the blue straps about a month ago, and now the fleshy-globes are rising up over the edges of the cup. We predict that if this steady climb continues, her buttons will be straining in a mere four months!
Also, our neighboring town of Rudeights, the one that we share telephone wires and snowplows with, will be signing a peace treaty to stop the physical attacks of lustclear bombs. Hopefully we can withdraw the hand-and-foot nerves, as well as the gueiralla warfare of the taste-buds, from thier lovely country soon. More on this later, but for know, enjoy the sultry tunes of Mindless Self Thoughts. Have fun, and stay sexy.
Soraxel song is When Doves Cry by Prince with the end line taken from OAR's 'Shattered'.
{Crappy little one-shots I haven't brought myself to re-write or edit and post. Mainly I only the beginings. The idea is there, but I can't seem to get them just right.}